Bulking When Already Looking Like ****

Bigger Stronger Leaner Competitive Bodybuilding
41

Man, please please for my sake, the sake of your family and your friends and most importantly, for your sake…please speak to someone. I am not saying this to be mean. You are not fat. You MUST eat more.

Work yourself slowly up to six meals a day. Start with eating three solid meals with as big of a breakfast as you can manage. Drink a big (grab the biggest glass in your cupboard) glass of milk and drink it right before bed. That doesn’t count as a meal btw. Do us a favour and make a log for us to see what you eat each day along with your training.

You can eat pizza, McDonalds, ice cream and cheesecake…whatever you want. The point is to get you healthy again by bringing your weight up. I repeat, YOU ARE NOT FAT. No cardio for you.

If you have questions or something, pm me. I won’t be an asshole…I will try to answer as best as I can if you so wish it.

42

First post. I’ve been lurking for about a year, waiting until I felt qualified to actually contribute something useful before jumping in. Well, right now I feel qualified.

When I stumbled on here a year ago (sadly I discovered this site through the Men’s Health forums, where I was hoping to learn how to sculpt my abs), I weighed 135 pounds at 6’1. I had been suffering from anorexia and vegetarianism. I read some Berardi and some Lowery, thought they had some good ideas, but I couldn’t imagine putting away all the food they were prescribing.

That was before I found the Photo Forum.

At that time there had apparently been a flurry of skinny kids posting close-ups of their strirated ribs looking for praise. And man, these T-Nation guys, they were brutal. Every time they made a crack, it cut me deep. They weren’t talking to me, but they were talking to me.

I felt ashamed of myself. It hurt. And it was exactly what I needed.

Cressey, I love my foam roller, but you don’t know everything about everything. Sometimes a swift kick in the ass is exactly what we need, even those of us with a history of psychological disorders. We’re not delicate little flowers who need to be handled with care. We’re men, even if we don’t always eat that way.

I’ve gained 50 pounds so far and I can’t wait to break 200. And I would not have gotten here if not for this website and the assholes who populate it.

FriedRice, it looks like you’re on the right track. Realize that it won’t always be easy. Your belly is going to stick out further than your pecs. You won’t see your abs for a long time. Even when it feels like that next bite will turn you into the wheelbarrow fellow pictured above, chew it up and choke it down. Because that’s what a man does.

A lot of these guys probably know a lot more than I do, but feel free to PM me if you feel like talking to someone who’s “been there”.

Tom

43

[quote]tanuki wrote:
First post. I’ve been lurking for about a year, waiting until I felt qualified to actually contribute something useful before jumping in. Well, right now I feel qualified.

When I stumbled on here a year ago (sadly I discovered this site through the Men’s Health forums, where I was hoping to learn how to sculpt my abs), I weighed 135 pounds at 6’1. I had been suffering from anorexia and vegetarianism. I read some Berardi and some Lowery, thought they had some good ideas, but I couldn’t imagine putting away all the food they were prescribing.

That was before I found the Photo Forum.

At that time there had apparently been a flurry of skinny kids posting close-ups of their strirated ribs looking for praise. And man, these T-Nation guys, they were brutal. Every time they made a crack, it cut me deep. They weren’t talking to me, but they were talking to me.

I felt ashamed of myself. It hurt. And it was exactly what I needed.

Cressey, I love my foam roller, but you don’t know everything about everything. Sometimes a swift kick in the ass is exactly what we need, even those of us with a history of psychological disorders. We’re not delicate little flowers who need to be handled with care. We’re men, even if we don’t always eat that way.

I’ve gained 50 pounds so far and I can’t wait to break 200. And I would not have gotten here if not for this website and the assholes who populate it.

FriedRice, it looks like you’re on the right track. Realize that it won’t always be easy. Your belly is going to stick out further than your pecs. You won’t see your abs for a long time. Even when it feels like that next bite will turn you into the wheelbarrow fellow pictured above, chew it up and choke it down. Because that’s what a man does.

A lot of these guys probably know a lot more than I do, but feel free to PM me if you feel like talking to someone who’s “been there”.

Tom[/quote]

This asshole is glad you made that much progress.

44

Good luck man. You’re in the right place. And keep us updated!!!

-MAtt

45

[quote]friedrice683 wrote:
Hey guys…I think I made you guys think the wrong thing. What I meant by that is my mom will bring me to the doctor’s if she knows I’m sick, but anything else, such as depression, she handles herself. I am seeing a shrink. I told the shrink when I thought I had anorexia, when I actually did have it, and I told the shrink I am doing much better, which I am right now. (Eating 2x as much as I was when I was anorexic less than 3 months ago).

Anyways, thanks again for all your willingness to help, all those who offered private help, I am taking all of this advice and putting it to good use.

My mom through out the scale two days ago, it was the best thing too caus now I don’t even care or even want to know what it says, I enjoy just eating a lot and getting bigger.

However, I’m going on vacation with her for a week at the end of this week. Should I still eat a lot even though I will have no access to the gym? Or should I just take it easy and wait until I’m back in the gym, whatever’s best I’m willing to do.

Thanks again guys, I appreciate it more than you’ll ever know.

Oh yeah someone wanted to know what I ate today. I hear you are supposed to gradually go into a bulk diet, so I am, gradually increasing my calories up to that 3,000-3,500 mark.

Breakfast
cup of oatmeal
protein shake

post-workout
protein shake
peanutbutter and roast beef on whole wheat
MRP (56g of protein, 11g carbs, 3g fat)

snack
roast beef
2 veggie burgers and egg whites
a crap load of peanutbutter

dinner
1/2 an entire pot roast
cup of mozarella cheese sprinkled on it

goin to bed now :slight_smile:

Thanks again guys, you really are life-savers. [/quote]

That’s good, keep it up. I would keep eating (more) for that week if you can.

Dax

46

There’s a big part of the problem.

Yes. You can do bodyweight exercises at the hotel, such as pushups (with feet elevated on the bed, too), squats, chair dips, hand-stand pushups, door pullups, and even some isometrics.

47

[quote]tanuki wrote:
I felt ashamed of myself. It hurt. And it was exactly what I needed.
Tom[/quote]

Tanuki, nice first post!

I think one of the things that happens here, on T-Nation, is perhaps that we reject and counter the retarded social pressures that drive people to strive for lean at any price.

A healthy body, not a malnourished one, is attractive. Regardless of what Hollywood and popular magazines are trying to promote.

Anyway, just figured that maybe there are more people out there sitting on the fence, trying to get over the concept of “abs at any cost”.

48

Hey Tom,

Drop me an email: ec@ericcressey.com.

49

The last time I logged on it said, “Bodybuilding Think-Tank”, not “Shrink Tank”. It’s nice how this thread has turned all fuzzy and warm since Eric posted. Where were all you guys at the the start?

If Eric or any of you want to open this place up to people looking for eating disorder guidance and treatment, well get a Medical Degree and a good lawyer, because you’re gonna need it. That’s a precedent that shouldn’t be allowed. Very slippery slope.

If this guy and others like him are as fragile as E.C thinks, then to encourage that idea, is the worst thing that can be done for him and others. I can hear it now," hey guys I found this great place online where everyone is oh so nice and I get all the help I need". Then his parents sue your ass off when something happens.

Is this something Tim, TC, Shugs want to encourage? I highly doubt that.

The best that most of can do here is to tell this kid to eat and seek help, which was said more than once. We all read his first post.

50

[quote]pbody03 wrote:
The last time I logged on it said, “Bodybuilding Think-Tank”, not “Shrink Tank”. It’s nice how this thread has turned all fuzzy and warm since Eric posted. Where were all you guys at the the start?

If Eric or any of you want to open this place up to people looking for eating disorder guidance and treatment, well get a Medical Degree and a good lawyer, because you’re gonna need it. That’s a precedent that shouldn’t be allowed. Very slippery slope.

If this guy and others like him are as fragile as E.C thinks, then to encourage that idea, is the worst thing that can be done for him and others. I can hear it now," hey guys I found this great place online where everyone is oh so nice and I get all the help I need". Then his parents sue your ass off when something happens.

Is this something Tim, TC, Shugs want to encourage? I highly doubt that.

The best that most of can do here is to tell this kid to eat and seek help, which was said more than once. We all read his first post. [/quote]

I couldn’t agree more. I personally am not putting my license on the line by trying to actually give TREATMENT over the internet FOR FREE. The entire idea is completely removed from logic and anyone acting like we need to become “Consult-Nation” needs to have their head examined…professionally.

51

Seems to me this is a forum, a place where regular people, which includes those with issues, talk about things.

Professionals have standards of conduct to worry about and so forth, general idiots like myself, do not.

I think people asking for help in a public forum understand that they will be getting all kinds of bullshit in return and that they’ll have to sort through it.

52

[quote]vroom wrote:
I think people asking for help in a public forum understand that they will be getting all kinds of bullshit in return and that they’ll have to sort through it.[/quote]

Especially coming to a forum clearly labled “Testosterone Nation”…

53

[quote]vroom wrote:
Seems to me this is a forum, a place where regular people, which includes those with issues, talk about things.

Professionals have standards of conduct to worry about and so forth, general idiots like myself, do not.

I think people asking for help in a public forum understand that they will be getting all kinds of bullshit in return and that they’ll have to sort through it.[/quote]

To take it beyond that creates HUGE ethical and practical delimmas. You can’t just begin giving treatment and direct referrals over the internet. The most this place should be is an avenue for someone to help THEMSELVES, not to expect actual treatment for mental or physical disease processes. Again, I am amazed this issue even came up. There is a guy like this logging on at least once a week or more. Where was the sudden concern to turn this in to a treatment center then? Be prepared for your first law suit.

54

Something to consider…

A kid with existing “issues” logs in and you berate him mercilessly. He goes and kills himself.

Aren’t you just as liable as if you sent him some encouraging words?

Few quick notes:

-Convincing a kid to get his blood drawn is a million times easier than getting an anorexic to “just eat a burger.”

-When you have a problem that is just a subcategory of a larger class of problems (obsessive compulsive disorder), there isn’t one simply solution like “Just sack up and eat.” One size doesn’t fit all.

-If a morbidly obese person comes on here and you ridicule them and tell them to “just eat less and exercise more,” are they automatically able to do it? My father has every risk factor there is for cardiovascular disease, and I’ve been trying to help him for 25 years; if it was that easy, don’t you think that I would have stumbled onto this by now? People’s minds work in different ways; they aren’t always going to respond to the same approach.

55

[quote]Eric Cressey wrote:
Something to consider…

A kid with existing “issues” logs in and you berate him mercilessly. He goes and kills himself.

Aren’t you just as liable as if you sent him some encouraging words?

Few quick notes:

-Convincing a kid to get his blood drawn is a million times easier than getting an anorexic to “just eat a burger.”

-When you have a problem that is just a subcategory of a larger class of problems (obsessive compulsive disorder), there isn’t one simply solution like “Just sack up and eat.” One size doesn’t fit all.

-If a morbidly obese person comes on here and you ridicule them and tell them to “just eat less and exercise more,” are they automatically able to do it? My father has every risk factor there is for cardiovascular disease, and I’ve been trying to help him for 25 years; if it was that easy, don’t you think that I would have stumbled onto this by now? People’s minds work in different ways; they aren’t always going to respond to the same approach.[/quote]

Why do you assume the same approach is used on everyone? It isn’t. If you believe it is, you aren’t paying attention. This one poster started at least 4 different threads in one day all ranging across the entire spectrum of what he is dealing with. This is a public forum. As “blunt” as it may seem, the only one here that would be responsible if someone killed themselves…is the one who actually gave them professional TREATMENT before they did so.

56

Just to add, there are PROFESSIONAL lawyers who visit this site regularly as well. perhaps ask BostonBarrister about the extent to which treatment can actually be given before you become liable.

57

[quote]Eric Cressey wrote:
Something to consider…

A kid with existing “issues” logs in and you berate him mercilessly. He goes and kills himself.

Aren’t you just as liable as if you sent him some encouraging words?

Few quick notes:

-Convincing a kid to get his blood drawn is a million times easier than getting an anorexic to “just eat a burger.”

-When you have a problem that is just a subcategory of a larger class of problems (obsessive compulsive disorder), there isn’t one simply solution like “Just sack up and eat.” One size doesn’t fit all.

-If a morbidly obese person comes on here and you ridicule them and tell them to “just eat less and exercise more,” are they automatically able to do it? My father has every risk factor there is for cardiovascular disease, and I’ve been trying to help him for 25 years; if it was that easy, don’t you think that I would have stumbled onto this by now? People’s minds work in different ways; they aren’t always going to respond to the same approach.[/quote]

Then the mods and the higher ups should NOT let posts like that get through. This isnt the place for that. They should re-direct them to a place that is better suited for them or to people that can help them one on one in private. If their problems are so major the community doesnt need to know about it.

These people are coming to a BODYBUILDING site. What could they possibly expect, an Oprah intervention? Just a few clicks of random threads shows what type of people frequent here. I highly doubt these people are clicking on T-Nation, blindly joining and beginning to post away. If you begin posting away on a forum about your problems you’re looking for a quick fix. Expecting that you’re going to get the months of hand holding one on one help from a forum is extremely naive. The best thing people can do is say “go get help” or “go see a dr” when it comes to something like this. It was said numerous times in here.

I cant count how many times people have been told straight up, “GO TO A DOCTOR.”

58

Experts and doctors don’t cure, they treat. The cure is found on the left hand sidebar:

We improve ourselves by victories over ourself. There must be contests, and you must win. – Edward Gibbon

59

[quote]Eric Cressey wrote:
Something to consider…

A kid with existing “issues” logs in and you berate him mercilessly. He goes and kills himself.

Aren’t you just as liable as if you sent him some encouraging words?
[/quote]

No. This is a heavily moderated bodybuilding forum, not an online psychiatric practice. Most of the posters in FriedRice’s (ugh, not my favorite food) threads know that. We’re just big men telling him to eat more. The rest is very much up to him, whether he eats more or not, continues to be preoccupied about actually structuring a diet, seeks additional counseling on his self-image, or whatever.

60

[quote]Eric Cressey wrote:
Something to consider…
[/quote]

Eric,

I don’t have any issue with you being concerned about the possible direction that things can take. It is important to realize that things you say can have consequences.

An acquaintance of mine once killed himself in part due to a phrase I used when the dart game we were involved in went on endlessly. I said “I don’t care if I win or lose, I just want the game to be over”.

Unfortunately, he applied that phrase to situations in his life that I had no knowledge of and killed himself that evening. Basically, that phrase was the straw, and though I didn’t understand it at the time, his attitude went sour shortly afterwards.

While I certainly felt horrible about my small part in that fiasco, it’s not my responsibility to understand the mental state of everyone I talk to. I can’t magically read their minds and know how they will react to anything I might say.

Regardless, coming to a public forum to ask questions is known to lead to answers of all types. You will get praise, ridicule, advice, support, criticism and everything inbetween. It’s the way Internet forums work. It is happening all over the world on millions of forums right now.

Surely, there are people who are finding that “last straw” at times as well. The best we can do is try to take things seriously and not be that last straw. In particular, if you know a situation is fragile than your social responsibility changes quite a bit.

The fact that some people are unable to cope with the pressures of life, or the comments of others even when anonymous, is not the responsibility of the world – as harsh as that may seem.

I would guess that it is impossible to know which people posting on a public resource have issues and which ones don’t. The degree of fragility of a person is not something that is easily assessed. However, the character of this site is easily assessed by anyone wishing to post a message to it.

It is open for reading. Other requests and responses are certainly visible. People need to decide for themselves if they can handle the brand of advice they will get on “Testosterone Nation” and I believe that most who do post are fully aware of how Internet forums work.

They are anonymous. They can run and hide if they then wish to.

To summarize, I don’t have any problem with your viewpoint or your concern for people. That is certainly admirable. However, I am not so much in favor of trying to ensure everyone is playing nice all the time because we just don’t know when someone might have serious issues.

The people here generally don’t seem to be about tiptoeing through life…