Alright. I’m frustrated as hell. Pissed off and almost ready to quit. I’ve spent considerable time thinking about my progress over the last 2 years. As a newbie I saw some good gains. I saw my strength increase rapidly, bodyfat drop, and size increase. About once a week I’d have new stretch marks open up on my biceps. And as a typical newbie I didn’t keep a workout or food log and I didn’t even track my weight or bodyfat. I just ‘knew’ I was getting better. In fact, I didn’t work legs for the 1st 6 months and didn’t do cardio until a year after that. My diet consisted of some soy protein (maybe 80g/day), GatorAde, and take out food. I hit a peak about a year ago. Waist was down to about 32" and I weighed about 190#. Still didn’t know what bodyfat % was. I was benching 265 (1rm) and 225x7 fairly consistantly. Started using whey (tons of it), Nandrosol, Androsol, Tribex, and finally Finasol. Did long cycles of Clomid, T2, and MD6. I cycled between 177# and 196# trying to cut and gain repeatedly. Did Fat Fast with great results the 1st time. Later attempts weren’t so good. When I was 196# my gf commented that I was getting too fat and that I looked better when I was leaner (back @ 185#). Tried to cut several times but didn’t make much progress until about 3 months ago. After I read JMB’s method of bf reduction by doing cardio for a month while maintaining bw then dropping cals I tried that. BAM! I dropped from 190# to 178# in 20 days! I came off that diet feeling great. I felt like I made a serious dent in the bf finally and my strength was just under my alltime best until the end.
Now I’m all screwed up. My strength and endurance have been in the gutter for last couple of months. I started trying to shock myself into growth by varying my routine but any amount of overfeeding is just expanding my waist. When I look in the mirror I look ‘less’ muscular and cut than I did a year ago. Somehow I’ve lost my shoulder width and my upper pecs are almost nonexistent. Legs have come up a bit but I feel like my overall look has been compromised. More ‘skinny/fat’ than when I started. I’m caught in a perpetual loop of trying to cut 'cause I got no abs and trying to build 'cause I got no shoulders.