Oh that’s sad. It seems like there are all sorts of games people have to play with online dating.
I think that’s worth celebrating right there.
If anything happens to me, I want Chris to meet someone new while he’s out doing cool stuff: working out, hiking, salsa dancing, beer-making, volunteering, etc. That’s my only stipulation. No dating apps.
This speaks volumes about what kind of partner you are. Y’all are both lucky to have found each other!
This put a huge smile on my face. YAY!!
Oh, @Andrewgen_Receptors recently shared a couple book recommendations in my log about this specific topic.
I don’t understand all the over analyzing here. The situation is beyond a platonic text message to an ex. There is still a relationship given ongoing communication and nearly every other cheating red flag imaginable, including clothes accidentally left at her place. Stop helping the man hoodwink himself.
The emotional affair alone is too much, even if sex can’t be confirmed. This shouldn’t have to be explained to a spouse as if it’s a personal toothpaste flavor preference.
I don’t know anyone with an only fans but I do know someone who joined dating apps for validation. She graduated with a CS degree from the university I went to for undergrad and currently earns 6 figures as a software engineer. she gets validation from her teammates and supervisor weekly, if not more often.
From what I understand, the validation she gets from dating apps is very different from the validation she gets from the rest of her life. She’s not ugly, but isn’t what most would consider attractive (slightly overweight, struggles with acne). She likes that she feels desired in a way other than “the girl who writes code and fixes bugs” even if she is VERY good at writing code and fixing bugs
Me too. I made the transition from working with kids to adults right around the time I met my now-husband and these conversations - whether I agree or not - are helpful for that, too.
He doesn’t even seem to have had a frank conversation with her yet. Don’t you think he should? Because much of the wrongdoing we’re so worked up about is speculated, either by OP or by other posters. She may have deleted messages, she may be phoning him from work, etc.
In his initial post he’s not even sure he has the right to be unhappy with the friendship, and now he should just pack his shit and go without telling her he’s unhappy with it?
How is his personal insecurity and reluctance to acknowledge what’s happening a bellwether of right or wrong in her actions? The support he needs is to buck up and look at the situation objectively, not downplay every single clue and be hapless.
Why ignore every red flag, and there are multiple, to hold a pseudo intellectual conversation in an online forum?
Do you expect her to come out and just say “yeah, I have been dirty deleting texts to hide them from you, but let me tell you all about them now”.
Does he need to walk in on her getting railed to know with certainty she’s cheating before making his decision?
Does the next shirt he finds need to have “return to _______” with his name and address written on the tag?
One issue and maybe two, ok, give a little leeway but perhaps investigate if your gut says so.
In total, with a felt need to air his laundry on an Internet forum, not so much. He obviously knows he’s being slighted short of seeing the actual deed taking place. Be it physical, emotional or both. Let him explore those feelings instead of encouraging to tuck under the bullshit he’s eating.
I’m not sure. I’m in the one where every single poster, male and female alike, has said some variation on “oof, that’s not good,” and then either suggested leaving, or speaking plainly and then deciding whether to leave.
It’s one thing when you know a woman has a boyfriend or husbandbut far too many times I have seen women leading on a guy who has no ide they are in a relationship and are all too happy to be the recipient of male attention. In these cases I believe the responsability is on the woman.
Regarding the topic, sometimes a platonic friendship develops into something deeper, might be physical or emotional, and when it’s over, the friendship remains. Happened to me, so I can see it happening to others. It does not mean it will go back to be anything else. But I understand how it could be bothersome for a significant other.
I think some are talking about divorce flippantly. It is not easy, even in cases in which there there are serious transgressions in which there should be divorce (at-fault), and there are serious ramifications, not just financial ones that men seem to be barking and bellowing about in all corners of the Internet. Example: “She gonna take all of his shit!” Divorce can carry social and familial consequences, even if there are no children involved.
I would edit this to “cheating can carry social and familial consequences, even if there are no children involved”. Divorce is the logical next step for the victim. The scarlet letter belongs to the cheater.
I would again ask just how concrete evidence needs to be. Nearly every warning box is checked, short of walking in on the physical deed.
I just don’t prefer to publicly make an absolute statement without concrete evidence or advise a man who I don’t know from a hole in the wall. It’s up to him how he wants to proceed.
Some men and women actually tolerate infidelity. I know of such a woman, my former friend’s wife. He’s loaded, and from a loaded family (surprise!)
I personally would not tolerate my wife talking to any man “like a couple” or maintaining “friendship” with an ex. No… freaking way.
Maintaining friendship with a man whose mind is filled with previous sexual experiences. As expressed previously, I consider this nuts!
I’m a 1000 times more curious about this situation than anything Taylor Swift is up to.
And this thread is packed with interesting discussions and ideas (alpha widow? What?!) Props to the T Nation Community. Can’t get this stuff on Instagram.
This reminded me of when Jada Pinkett Smith said in some interview that she and Tupac were soulmates or some shit.
Fuck Will Smith and his clean Mr. nice guy bullshit, she’s in love with the dead ‘‘thug’’.
No wonder the guy has gone bonkers. That bitch is clearly an alpha window.
