My dad always told me “If you want a friend, be a friend.”
Basically, if you see somebody doing something like working on their car and you know what your doing, go help them out. Thats just an example. It takes a while to meet quality people. If you see some guy in the gym struggling with bad form, go help them out. Do you consider yourself extroverted or introverted?
[quote]MaximusB wrote:
Our lives also go in different directions after college too. The whole “drink til you puke” lifestyle gets old, and when you have real world responsibility you cannot afford to fuck around as much as you did in college. I don’t think its hard making new friends after college, as it is to make friends with similar interests and headed in similar directions. My days of partying like a mad man are few and far between, because I had my fun (way too much of it) and it gets old. [/quote]
The only really “new” friends I’ve met have been at the gym. Funny enough, they are also the first who called me when the hurricane hit…even the ones back in Florida.
[quote]entheogens wrote:
No, it’s not just you. Think about it. At college there are a lot of people to choose from, and you can pretty much find somebody that you like.
If you work in a corporation, you are forced to associate at least 40 hours a week with people you don’t necessarily
like. In my case, I wouldn’t be caught dead with 99 percent of the people I work with…if it weren’t for work.
I believe that you are, like me, an engineer. I am sorry but MOST engineers, at least the ones here in Silicon Valley, are “good little boys” (as in teacher’s pet), anal and, well, crashing bores. If you lift weights, I know already that you don’t fit in with that bunch. For the most part, you should give up the notion of finding friends at work.
You’re going to have to make more of an effort to create a good social life. Join a sport team, take a class in a subject you enjoy where you are likely to meet like-minded individuals, etc. etc.
[/quote]
well put entheogens,
i’m a mechanical engineer…and yeah alot of people are wayy too wrapped up in their jobs to pick their head up and notice anyone.
i’ve only lived where i am now since june; so it’s only been a bit.
i joined a hockey team, should be starting in a week or so…i can’t wait!
and i’m definatly an extravert. i’m a loud outgoing person who is wiling to do almost anything. (with some exeptions)
[mind the spelling, im leaving work and makin’ this fast)
[quote]Renton wrote:
I wouldn’t know. I never had any friends in college and I don’t have any now. :-([/quote]
Begbie? Sick boy? Spud?
[quote]Subliminal-Steve wrote:
Renton wrote:
I wouldn’t know. I never had any friends in college and I don’t have any now. 
Begbie? Sick boy? Spud?[/quote]
He cheated them, remember?
[quote]B rocK wrote:
entheogens wrote:
No, it’s not just you. Think about it. At college there are a lot of people to choose from, and you can pretty much find somebody that you like.
If you work in a corporation, you are forced to associate at least 40 hours a week with people you don’t necessarily
like. In my case, I wouldn’t be caught dead with 99 percent of the people I work with…if it weren’t for work.
I believe that you are, like me, an engineer. I am sorry but MOST engineers, at least the ones here in Silicon Valley, are “good little boys” (as in teacher’s pet), anal and, well, crashing bores. If you lift weights, I know already that you don’t fit in with that bunch. For the most part, you should give up the notion of finding friends at work.
You’re going to have to make more of an effort to create a good social life. Join a sport team, take a class in a subject you enjoy where you are likely to meet like-minded individuals, etc. etc.
well put entheogens,
i’m a mechanical engineer…and yeah alot of people are wayy too wrapped up in their jobs to pick their head up and notice anyone.
i’ve only lived where i am now since june; so it’s only been a bit.
i joined a hockey team, should be starting in a week or so…i can’t wait!
and i’m definatly an extravert. i’m a loud outgoing person who is wiling to do almost anything. (with some exeptions)
[mind the spelling, im leaving work and makin’ this fast)[/quote]
hockey teams always get close haha i now mine is so it should work out well for you
[quote]Professor X wrote:
Just wait until you experience the “now you make more money than your friends so they start acting funny” phase.[/quote]
I’m in the “my friends are making more money than me so I am acting funny” phase
[quote]pch2 wrote:
Roual wrote:
To quote Monday’s Strong Words
“The strongest man in the world is he who stands alone.” �?? Henrik Ibsen
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go listen to Godsmack (10 points for anyone who can explain that)
Too easy…
Now I’ve told you this once before can’t control me
If you try to take me down you’re gonna break
I feel your every nothing that your doing for me
I’m thinking you oughta make you run away[/quote]
10 points to pch2
[quote]AssOnGrass wrote:
Professor X wrote:
Just wait until you experience the “now you make more money than your friends so they start acting funny” phase.
I’m in the “my friends are making more money than me so I am acting funny” phase[/quote]
I don’t get that. I don’t see how money should influence a friendship (I’m not saying it doesn’t, just, I don’t see why it should). I have friends who earn so much more money than me they’d probably spend my annual wage on a meal and not bat an eyelid.
On the other end of the scale, I’ve a very good friend who I ended up lending a lot of money to when he was persuing personal projects instead of a traditional 9 - 5 job. Now he’s earning more than me and it hasn’t changed how close we are. Like prof X said though, he’s one of those friends that either one of us would drop everything if the other needed help.
[quote]AssOnGrass wrote:
Professor X wrote:
Just wait until you experience the “now you make more money than your friends so they start acting funny” phase.
I’m in the “my friends are making more money than me so I am acting funny” phase[/quote]
I think I’m right on par with 90% of my friends; but the “girls” subgroup we have is funny because there are about 3 of them that are up around 75-100k (Physician Assistants) and they are looked at differently. I only know this because my girl is one of them.
It’s nice to have that. 
awww Brock ill be your friend
“nobodys gonna stand in my way, im doing this my way”
[quote]Roual wrote:
AssOnGrass wrote:
Professor X wrote:
Just wait until you experience the “now you make more money than your friends so they start acting funny” phase.
I’m in the “my friends are making more money than me so I am acting funny” phase
I don’t get that. I don’t see how money should influence a friendship (I’m not saying it doesn’t, just, I don’t see why it should). I have friends who earn so much more money than me they’d probably spend my annual wage on a meal and not bat an eyelid.
On the other end of the scale, I’ve a very good friend who I ended up lending a lot of money to when he was persuing personal projects instead of a traditional 9 - 5 job. Now he’s earning more than me and it hasn’t changed how close we are. Like prof X said though, he’s one of those friends that either one of us would drop everything if the other needed help.[/quote]
Things change depending on how old you are and how close you really were. Partying every other night and going out every weekend sounds great when you are 22. When you get close to 32 and you are still doing that, you start to notice that the guys who didn’t (the ones made fun of for not going out all of the time because of studying or discipline) are now reaping benefits from that.
If you grew up with people who knew you when all of you were broke, once some start moving away from that and get closer to “not broke and a little comfortable”, there can be some animosity.
Imagine what pro football players go through when they first get signed. Everyone back home would have a hand out. You would suddenly get 30 new friends you can’t trust and the previous friends you had would suddenly feel a lot less significant.
That’s just human nature. If you first met your friends when they were already doing well, that changes everything.
People breaking loose of whatever box you placed them in is the issue…that and knowing who your real friends are.
[quote]B rocK wrote:
Is it just me; or it is harder?
I mean, I went to college…had/have a bunch of friends from the area and that graduated. But since; I have moved and so have they. I live near boston now and a bunch of my friends live IN boston. They are always doing shit; but I typcially don’t feel like driving BACK into boston at night (I work in boston and commute 30min into the city).
Also, I don’t really drink/party as much as I did then; which tends to be typical. My friends are nuts though…so they still do.
People at my work are some of the most unfriendly and super busy people I’ve delt with in my post college life thus far. It’s crazy; I can’t get 90% of the people to lock eyes with me in order to say “hi”
And at the gym I’m all business. I ask people for spots; and assist my girlfriend with her lifts…but that’s about it. Get in, lift, get out, eat.
Anyone else notice this?
(after reading this; i really feel like a loser haha)
oh well. :)[/quote]
You are not alone in this experience.
Yes. It sucks. Everyone I know has moved away. I have one general acquaintance that I’m just casual with, and that’s it.
Really depressing at times.
[quote]entheogens wrote:
No, it’s not just you. Think about it. At college there are a lot of people to choose from, and you can pretty much find somebody that you like.
If you work in a corporation, you are forced to associate at least 40 hours a week with people you don’t necessarily
like. In my case, I wouldn’t be caught dead with 99 percent of the people I work with…if it weren’t for work.
I believe that you are, like me, an engineer. I am sorry but MOST engineers, at least the ones here in Silicon Valley, are “good little boys” (as in teacher’s pet), anal and, well, crashing bores. If you lift weights, I know already that you don’t fit in with that bunch. For the most part, you should give up the notion of finding friends at work.
You’re going to have to make more of an effort to create a good social life. Join a sport team, take a class in a subject you enjoy where you are likely to meet like-minded individuals, etc. etc.
[/quote]
It’s even worse in the defense industry. All the engineers are a bunch of baby-boomer fossils who haven’t done anything physical in the better part of 40 years. What a dull group of people. Everything you’ve said is true of the ones fresh out of college, though. I feel pretty trapped having to associate with people like that all week. Call me a wahhhmbulance. violin playing
[quote]Professor X wrote:
Professor X wrote:
Things change depending on how old you are and how close you really were. Partying every other night and going out every weekend sounds great when you are 22. When you get close to 32 and you are still doing that, you start to notice that the guys who didn’t (the ones made fun of for not going out all of the time because of studying or discipline) are now reaping benefits from that.
If you grew up with people who knew you when all of you were broke, once some start moving away from that and get closer to “not broke and a little comfortable”, there can be some animosity.
Imagine what pro football players go through when they first get signed. Everyone back home would have a hand out. You would suddenly get 30 new friends you can’t trust and the previous friends you had would suddenly feel a lot less significant.
That’s just human nature. If you first met your friends when they were already doing well, that changes everything.
People breaking loose of whatever box you placed them in is the issue…that and knowing who your real friends are.[/quote]
Looking back, I guess I’ve been lucky with my friends. I’ve only really got a couple of friends from school (mid 20’s now incase you were wondering), the rest I’ve made through working various jobs but none of them have ever been the out drunk every weekend type.
I understand what you mean about football players though, I’d imagine it would be even worse if you suddenly came into a lot of money (i.e. winning the lottery). Friends you’d forgotten about would suddenly appear and your real friends may suffer for it.
it also seems that (at least with my family and having an older sibling) as your number of friends dwindles, we tend to get closer to our roots (family).
my sibling doesn’t haev too many friends b/c they are all starting families as well as my sibling.
its funny how you spend so much time trying to push away from the second you leave the womb; that now it all comes back around full circle.
i have always been close to my family; but wanted independence but here i am…i moved back to MA (from NY) and see my family over hanging with friends.
weird.
my friends are more fun though haha.
[quote]B rocK wrote:
it also seems that (at least with my family and having an older sibling) as your number of friends dwindles, we tend to get closer to our roots (family).
my sibling doesn’t haev too many friends b/c they are all starting families as well as my sibling.
its funny how you spend so much time trying to push away from the second you leave the womb; that now it all comes back around full circle.
i have always been close to my family; but wanted independence but here i am…i moved back to MA (from NY) and see my family over hanging with friends.
weird.
my friends are more fun though haha.[/quote]
thats a good point man, thats why it good to have alot of sibilings because i have 3 and that that eventaully will grow into a large family yano hah
I feel for you. I’m having trouble making friends IN college, let along after.
I have plenty of acquaintances, but I feel like everyone else is forming real friendships while I just “know people”.
It blows. Worst part: All of my “friends” aren’t even in my building.
/whine