If this post seems a little rant-y, it’s because I just finished yet another horribly disappointing lifting session and I’m pretty pissed off.
At this point in my training I’m completely lost and I don’t know where to go from here. Probably the main reason I’m posting is for someone to confirm my suspicions to why my training has been completely sucking and affirm that I’m not stuck here forever.
So a summary of my training history:
2008-2010: General fucking around in the gym, following Starting Strength off and on for a few months at a time. Nothing serious.
November 2010 - May 2011: Started following 5/3/1, got serious about the gym. I was also playing a club sport in the on-season then, but I still made my best gains during this time. Squat - 155, Bench - 115, Deadlift - 235
May 2011 - November 2011: Joined a gym after graduating college that followed a Westside template. By November, my squat had gotten up to 200lbs, but this was only because I stopped squatting ATG and just went to parallel or a little below. Bench - 115, Deadlift - 235.
November 2011 - April 2012: After I started working at a gym, I stopped following the Westside template and went back to 5/3/1. I did a meet in March and did: Squat - 200, Bench - 115, Deadlift - 240. I ended up aggravating an old back injury in early April and had to take about a month to do easy stuff / rehab.
April 2012 - Now: I made a full recovery from my back injury. Since this time I’ve also lost ~25 pounds (on purpose). I’ve been guinea-pigging a powerlifting program my friend wrote. My lifts at present are: Squat - 195, Bench - 125, Deadlift - 210.
This is absolutely pathetic, especially the deadlift. My lifts have done nothing in almost 2 years. I don’t know what to do anymore. Whether I’ve failed all the programs I’ve been on or the programs have failed me doesn’t matter, either way failure was the result. I’m tired of being stuck, and the irrational thought that this is just my limit of strength keeps getting more persuasive. I walk into the gym with the expectation of failure and I don’t know how to stop that from happening when all the evidence points that way.
Obviously the weight loss isn’t helping my case. But that doesn’t explain all of my wasted training prior to that. I’ll be done with this weight loss in the coming months and I want to know where I’m going to go from there. I know this post has been a lot of whining so if you got this far I appreciate it - any advice would be appreciated even more so.