Let's Process Our Feelings

Off Topic
922

[quote]pushharder wrote:

[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
I am currently processing the feelings of being deeply in like and also nicely in lust, as well as having had too little sleep last night.

You’re all very lucky that I’m having dinner with my best friend tonight, so she can listen to me gush about Hockey and you won’t have to.

[/quote]
[/quote]
:slight_smile:

Know what was one of the nicest things (which allowed time for one of the other nicest things)? We woke for some unremembered reason this morning at 5:10, and were talking a little as we settled back to sleep - and then he said something so funny I wound up laughing my ass off, after which we were both wide awake. I don’t think I’ve ever been with a man who makes me laugh as much as I make him laugh. I think this guy may be as funny to me as my best friend. Just this incredible, deadpan, cheerful sense of humor. And I get to make him laugh, too.

It’s fun.

Okay, that’s all my gushing for now. I have to go to dinner. lol

923

[quote]csulli wrote:

[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
He smells really good.
[/quote]
Every time with you women… So weird.[/quote]

It’s not a very big study and I have no idea if it’s been repeated, but this is interesting.

I’m with you about smell. It’s not his soap or any skin product, but The Mister just smells really good. I love to snuggle my face right below his ear. I think this would be a big drawback with people meeting on the web. They’d need to pass the sniff test. Honestly, when I was dating this was a thing for me. Some men just don’t smell right.

Changing topics…

Emily, I didn’t want to take up more of Spock’s thread taking about clothes, but you mentioned age and skirt lengths. I’m with you, I think. Since I’m short, I can pull off shorter lengths without looking too risque, but I’m starting to feel more comfortable with lengths that come to about my knee, or just above. I don’t like to look like “older gal, trying too hard”, or “older gal, needs to stay out of her daughter’s closet.” I have a teenage son, and I don’t need his friends saying “wow your mom” either. :slight_smile:

Funny, when I was in my teens and 20’s I was more modest, with lots of my skirts coming down to mid-calf. Remember the Laura Ashley look? Then I think the climate and beach culture here in Ca had an impact. - It’s been in the 80’s here this week, and during the summer you see lots of swimsuits everywhere - along with other factors that influenced me. And spending way more time in exercise clothes made me more comfortable showing more skin. Still, if I’m going to show more leg, I’ll always cover my arms and wear a higher cut top. And if I wear a lower cut blouse or sundress, I tend to cover my thighs, and/or wear a sweater that covers my shoulders. I think that’s a key to dressing ladylike, If you are going to expose a little leg, cover your top and vice versa.

I haven’t been following, but this Hockey sounds nice. Exciting!

Edited

925

Ha! Well, Chuck E’s best friend was considerably less sold on the whole thing. Not because she doubts Hockey in any way, but because she’s worried that I’m “doing that thing again” where I only see the good things and if I notice bad, brush it away. I may have mentioned in here 70 or 80 times, and I mentioned it to her last night, that I would have broken up with Tim long before I did if she hadn’t been doing the exact same thing (“But I LIKE him, Emily. You like him, too!”).

Even last night I had to run down the list of absolute deal-breakers (some of which I haven’t talked about in here) to pull her away from the idea that there is or should be a romantic spark remaining there. She and I have a similar tendency to recognize red flags, but then lose focus on them in favor of positives. Which is why we’re similarly good at strengths-based work.

Still, the only red flag I’ve noted with Hockey (and am still exploring) is the physical piece, and wondering do we suit there. That’ll take time, but happily exploration of the matter is pleasant.

So Chuck E is in tentative strong like. Hero worship is present, but that’s infatuation, not love, unless it’s sustainable. Hockey seems to be right there with me, which is helpful, obviously.

927

[quote]Powerpuff wrote:

[quote]csulli wrote:

[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
He smells really good.
[/quote]
Every time with you women… So weird.[/quote]

It’s not a very big study and I have no idea if it’s been repeated, but this is interesting.

I’m with you about smell. It’s not his soap or any skin product, but The Mister just smells really good. I love to snuggle my face right below his ear. I think this would be a big drawback with people meeting on the web. They’d need to pass the sniff test. Honestly, when I was dating this was a thing for me. Some men just don’t smell right.

Changing topics…

Emily, I didn’t want to take up more of Spock’s thread taking about clothes, but you mentioned age and skirt lengths. I’m with you, I think. Since I’m short, I can pull off shorter lengths without looking too risque, but I’m starting to feel more comfortable with lengths that come to about my knee, or just above. I don’t like to look like “older gal, trying too hard”, or “older gal, needs to stay out of her daughter’s closet.” I have a teenage son, and I don’t need his friends saying “wow your mom” either. :slight_smile:

Funny, when I was in my teens and 20’s I was more modest, with lots of my skirts coming down to mid-calf. Remember the Laura Ashley look? Then I think the climate and beach culture here in Ca had an impact. - It’s been in the 80’s here this week, and during the summer you see lots of swimsuits everywhere - along with other factors that influenced me. And spending way more time in exercise clothes made me more comfortable showing more skin. Still, if I’m going to show more leg, I’ll always cover my arms and wear a higher cut top. And if I wear a lower cut blouse or sundress, I tend to cover my thighs, and/or wear a sweater that covers my shoulders. I think that’s a key to dressing ladylike, If you are going to expose a little leg, cover your top and vice versa.

I haven’t been following, but this Hockey sounds nice. Exciting!

Edited [/quote]

PP, I’ve run out of time to address this, but (obviously) it’s a topic of interest to me, too. I’ll be home tonight and will talk about it, but I will say that I’ve had a shift away from extreme modesty in dress, but without the religious component.

928

I surprised Derek hasn’t emerged with his processing gif… unless I missed that since I didn’t read a solid chunk of this thread.

929

[quote]spar4tee wrote:
I surprised Derek hasn’t emerged with his processing gif… unless I missed that since I didn’t read a solid chunk of this thread.[/quote]

I hope the processing GIF isn’t the one with all the skin tags.

930

[quote]EmilyQ wrote:

[quote]spar4tee wrote:
I surprised Derek hasn’t emerged with his processing gif… unless I missed that since I didn’t read a solid chunk of this thread.[/quote]

I hope the processing GIF isn’t the one with all the skin tags.
[/quote]
No, my dear.

931

[quote]Powerpuff wrote:

[quote]csulli wrote:

[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
He smells really good.
[/quote]
Every time with you women… So weird.[/quote]

It’s not a very big study and I have no idea if it’s been repeated, but this is interesting.

I’m with you about smell. It’s not his soap or any skin product, but The Mister just smells really good. I love to snuggle my face right below his ear. I think this would be a big drawback with people meeting on the web. They’d need to pass the sniff test. Honestly, when I was dating this was a thing for me. Some men just don’t smell right.

Changing topics…

Emily, I didn’t want to take up more of Spock’s thread taking about clothes, but you mentioned age and skirt lengths. I’m with you, I think. Since I’m short, I can pull off shorter lengths without looking too risque, but I’m starting to feel more comfortable with lengths that come to about my knee, or just above. I don’t like to look like “older gal, trying too hard”, or “older gal, needs to stay out of her daughter’s closet.” I have a teenage son, and I don’t need his friends saying “wow your mom” either. :slight_smile:

Funny, when I was in my teens and 20’s I was more modest, with lots of my skirts coming down to mid-calf. Remember the Laura Ashley look? Then I think the climate and beach culture here in Ca had an impact. - It’s been in the 80’s here this week, and during the summer you see lots of swimsuits everywhere - along with other factors that influenced me. And spending way more time in exercise clothes made me more comfortable showing more skin. Still, if I’m going to show more leg, I’ll always cover my arms and wear a higher cut top. And if I wear a lower cut blouse or sundress, I tend to cover my thighs, and/or wear a sweater that covers my shoulders. I think that’s a key to dressing ladylike, If you are going to expose a little leg, cover your top and vice versa.

I haven’t been following, but this Hockey sounds nice. Exciting!

Edited [/quote]

Okay, back to this - I think spending so much time in workout clothes has definitely reduced my bashfulness about skin. I rarely wear low-cut tops, though sometimes, but for some reason I’m very comfortable with my legs showing, within reason. Mostly I’m going for a look that’s appealing and makes me seem accessible, sporty, and casually sexy rather than overtly sexual. It’s important to me that other women like me. I guess that’s how I gauge whether I’m okay or not rather than any particular rule of thumb about dress. As long as women along the socioeconomic spectrum feel comfortable with me, I feel I’m managing to keep myself within bounds. If men find me appealing, too, then I’ve hit the sweet spot.

932

[quote]Chushin wrote:

[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
Ha! Well, Chuck E’s best friend was considerably less sold on the whole thing. Not because she doubts Hockey in any way, but because she’s worried that I’m “doing that thing again” where I only see the good things and if I notice bad, brush it away. I may have mentioned in here 70 or 80 times, and I mentioned it to her last night, that I would have broken up with Tim long before I did if she hadn’t been doing the exact same thing (“But I LIKE him, Emily. You like him, too!”).

Even last night I had to run down the list of absolute deal-breakers (some of which I haven’t talked about in here) to pull her away from the idea that there is or should be a romantic spark remaining there. She and I have a similar tendency to recognize red flags, but then lose focus on them in favor of positives. Which is why we’re similarly good at strengths-based work.

Still, the only red flag I’ve noted with Hockey (and am still exploring) is the physical piece, and wondering do we suit there. That’ll take time, but happily exploration of the matter is pleasant.

So Chuck E is in tentative strong like. Hero worship is present, but that’s infatuation, not love, unless it’s sustainable. Hockey seems to be right there with me, which is helpful, obviously.
[/quote]

Yeah, I was torn between “Are you doing that thing again???” and teasing you with Chuck E.

I decided to let you enjoy your euphoria. :-)[/quote]

I’m trying hard not to do that again. I’m hoping it won’t happen because it’s now an identified issue and I’m generally pretty good about changing maladaptive patterns. And let’s not forget that I’ve dropped a lot of men like hot potatoes when I’ve noticed something off.

But we’ll see what happens once (if) I get securely attached. That’s the test.

933

[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
But we’ll see what happens once (if) I get securely attached. That’s the test. [/quote]

Actually, the test is responsible for your libido. Oxytocin is responsible for attachment.

:stuck_out_tongue:

934

Right, I’m back and it turns out I AM gay, after all. Well, ‘bisexual’, anyway. Can we pick up where I left off, or do I have to start the whole process all over again?

936

[quote]Der_Steppenwolfe wrote:
Right, I’m back and it turns out I AM gay, after all. Well, ‘bisexual’, anyway. Can we pick up where I left off, or do I have to start the whole process all over again?[/quote]

All hot and bothered trying to label yourself?

937

Not really, I knocked off work 3 hours ago and I’m just getting back on T-Nation now because I’m going to need some lifting advice in, ooh, 3 week’s time. Thanks for being an insulting prick though, that’s why people come to T-Nation :smiley:

938

Seriously, though, the number of times I’ve gasped the words ‘fuck you, dicktoe’ after the last set over the past however long it’s been… it’s not even funny. I’m actually working on a project for carving starting strength by Mark Rippetoe into a stone tablet for posterity… it’s the last I can do.

939

[quote]Der_Steppenwolfe wrote:
Thanks for being an insulting prick though, that’s why people come to T-Nation :D[/quote]

There is wisdom in your words, potentially gay Sir, there are far too many sites where emotional diapers are handed out freely.

940

I hope so. I’m still a git, though, and I’d like to know:
Does anybody want a stone sculpture with Mark Rippetoe’s ‘A’ and ‘B’ workouts and simple instructions for carrying out the program carved into its face? I’m not in the business of making stuff on a speculative basis any more and I need a show of hands before I proceed.

Also:

Can Jamie Lewis in fact go fuck himself? He seems really nasty and egotistical. It’s a serious question. I mean, I’d never want to hang out with him, because I’m scared of him, but I’d like to know if I should keep reading his stuff.