[quote]sen say wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
And foppishness isn’t alpha.
[/quote]
What about fappishness?[/quote]
Extremely alpha
[quote]Chushin wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
Yeah, I’ve been thinking about it and have decided not to meet him. I’m not in his weight class. Mostly what I think is that whether he’s earnest or not, I’ll always worry that he’s the same restless sort of guy I keep trying to redeem. Mistrust does not make for a good foundation.
[/quote]
I’m Chushin, and I approve of this decision.[/quote]
Ack, his response this morning:
Now I have guilt and uncertainty. :-/
Swinger: “Okay, so, in reading your latest, the question that comes to my mind is, do you even need me for this conversation? It seems like you’re handling it pretty well as a solo act.”
Emily: “No as a matter of fact I don’t. I am a strong, independent, full bodied, African American woman, and I don’t need no man!”
[quote]csulli wrote:
Swinger: “Okay, so, in reading your latest, the question that comes to my mind is, do you even need me for this conversation? It seems like you’re handling it pretty well as a solo act.”
Emily: “No as a matter of fact I don’t. I am a strong, independent, full bodied, African American woman, and I don’t need no man!”
[/quote]
I thought about mentioning that actually I’m having the conversation with my posse of meatheads and jocks, not solo, but that didn’t seem best.
So I said good point and re-agreed to lunch. We’ll see what he says. He may not want to bother with it now. Could be he’s very insulted if he’s not a big ol’ libertine like Sen Say, or figures this isn’t going to be his sexual adventure dream come true if he is.
[quote]csulli wrote:
African American woman
[/quote]
?
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
[quote]csulli wrote:
African American woman
[/quote]
?[/quote]
My thought exactly.
[quote]Derek542 wrote:
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
[quote]csulli wrote:
African American woman
[/quote]
?[/quote]
My thought exactly. [/quote]
It was the “full-bodied” part that caught my attention. 
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
[quote]Derek542 wrote:
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
[quote]csulli wrote:
African American woman
[/quote]
?[/quote]
My thought exactly. [/quote]
It was the “full-bodied” part that caught my attention. :([/quote]
I just took that as referring to your breastes
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
[quote]Derek542 wrote:
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
[quote]csulli wrote:
African American woman
[/quote]
?[/quote]
My thought exactly. [/quote]
It was the “full-bodied” part that caught my attention. :([/quote]
You mean you aren’t a big sweet blackberry?
That does it. I’m outa here.
Wow Push, you mean after years of chronicling threesomes, foursomes, and sometimes many moresomes- you’re clamming up?
Not trying to be intrusive, but that’s not even like a new leaf, more like a whole different forest.
[quote]pushharder wrote:
LOL at the guys who still don’t get the Sen of Say after all these years.
[/quote]
To be fair, he doesn’t post all that often anymore.
Plus, he’s kinda like David Spade whereas DollarBill was Chris Farley. Kidding, Sen.
[quote]Derek542 wrote:
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
[quote]csulli wrote:
African American woman
[/quote]
?[/quote]
My thought exactly. [/quote]
Remember gentlemen, this is still the internet 
[quote]csulli wrote:
[quote]Derek542 wrote:
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
[quote]csulli wrote:
African American woman
[/quote]
?[/quote]
My thought exactly. [/quote]
Remember gentlemen, this is still the internet :)[/quote]
Your mom’s the internet.
Emily, something you wrote earlier about being abandoned by your mother struck a chord with me. I was abandoned also but by my father… You see where this is going?
Do you think not having a mother around has an effect on how you are as an adult woman? I ask because I’m certain it has an effect on me, it’s had an effect on me damned near my while life. I think not having a dad around is one of the reasons I joined the Corps, I think I was seeking out father like figures, go figure. After what I’ve gone through in that pursuit, I kinda have my own home made ideas of what being a man is about. Do you have any similar experiences or parallels about being a woman? There was a time where I needed to like, define man to myself, so I could have direction as to who I wanted to be/become in a sense.
There are things that impacted me negatively in sports being raised by a single mother, as when she went at the coaches they didn’t know how to deal with her and ended up causing a bit of drama. I remember so few people sticking up for my mother, but my mother sticking up for people wherever she could. I think this is something that really stuck with me that I like and am proud of, but like you I’m also incredibly short with flaky and clingy women. The abandonment issues are there as well, I have a pretty hard core loyalty about myself since I was abandoned and so few men stuck up for me in my youth.
Of course, it’s obviously more complicated than I’m leading on, but that’s it in a nutshell.
[quote]Severiano wrote:
Emily, something you wrote earlier about being abandoned by your mother struck a chord with me. I was abandoned also but by my father… You see where this is going?
Do you think not having a mother around has an effect on how you are as an adult woman? I ask because I’m certain it has an effect on me, it’s had an effect on me damned near my while life. I think not having a dad around is one of the reasons I joined the Corps, I think I was seeking out father like figures, go figure. After what I’ve gone through in that pursuit, I kinda have my own home made ideas of what being a man is about. Do you have any similar experiences or parallels about being a woman? There was a time where I needed to like, define man to myself, so I could have direction as to who I wanted to be/become in a sense.
There are things that impacted me negatively in sports being raised by a single mother, as when she went at the coaches they didn’t know how to deal with her and ended up causing a bit of drama. I remember so few people sticking up for my mother, but my mother sticking up for people wherever she could. I think this is something that really stuck with me that I like and am proud of, but like you I’m also incredibly short with flaky and clingy women. The abandonment issues are there as well, I have a pretty hard core loyalty about myself since I was abandoned and so few men stuck up for me in my youth.
Of course, it’s obviously more complicated than I’m leading on, but that’s it in a nutshell. [/quote]
Oh, absolutely, a profound effect. All I wanted growing up was a close family, and as I got older I started trying to figure out what made for a good family. I watched for it in novels, read all the pop-psych books, asked people who seemed to have what I wanted what they did in their marriages and raising kids, have been relentlessly curious about friends’ childhoods - and then ultimately focused myself on the topic in college and graduate school because I’d become sort of expert and continue to feel curious and passionate about the topic of happy people and healthy families.
And then there’s the piece Pushharder was talking about, the need and desire to BE there for my people.
Huge impacts.
[quote]Chushin wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
[quote]Chushin wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
Yeah, I’ve been thinking about it and have decided not to meet him. I’m not in his weight class. Mostly what I think is that whether he’s earnest or not, I’ll always worry that he’s the same restless sort of guy I keep trying to redeem. Mistrust does not make for a good foundation.
[/quote]
I’m Chushin, and I approve of this decision.[/quote]
Ack, his response this morning:
Now I have guilt and uncertainty. :-/[/quote]
Guilt? Certainly no need for that.
I have no idea what you wrote to him, and I’ll be the first to admit that he might be your dream partner, but I’m still sceptical.
I think I’d have more doubt about my sense of him if he’d responded with, “Ok, cool. I’m disappointed, but I understand, and would never want to push you into seeing me.”[/quote]
Of course, then we would all assume he’d just been trying to get laid!
Okay, so latest confusing thing: last night was the 4th date with the hockey player. The plan was for him to pick me up and we have a glass of wine here, then to dinner, then drinks. I’m very clear about the need to go dutch or pick up every other check or whatever, so as not to prostitute myself for a dinner or build either of our expectations that we’re in a relationship.
So, last night he showed up with FOUR Christmas presents (one probably +/- $50, the others minor), plus cheese, wine, chocolate. . . . and then we went for a sushi feast, which was my turn to pay for (and then some) but no, he did the quick check-grab thing (I don’t know how to manage the check thing - to what degree do I argue or launch myself after the check?), so I wound up buying a couple glasses of wine after, when we switched places. Which has been the pattern. He buys $100 dinners, I buy $24 drinks. I didn’t get him a gift. :-/
Now I feel obligated, but to what? I’m thinking I’ll offer to cook dinner, but is that as much as saying “now we’re officially together”? I like him, but I’m not ready to say that this is the one because he’s nice and quietly funny and very thoughtful. Though he is all those things and I do like him. I still don’t know about sex. We kissed twice last night, but chastely. I don’t actually want to have sex with him now, I just don’t know what that would be like if we did become closer, in terms of compatibility.
Please advise. Should I shoot him? Or is this workable? What’s my next move? I still want to meet Iraq (returning Feb 8th).