Injuries while Doing Stupid Things

Off Topic
21

[quote]Testy1 wrote:

[quote]rrjc5488 wrote:
Prof X hurt his bicep a few years back while curling 80’s without a warmup while seeking the validation of the skinny kid in the gym who thought he couldn’t do it.

[/quote]

It was actually from Zercher squatting. No one his size should put that kind of pressure on his bicep tendon.
[/quote]
Shit, I feel like heavy, properly performed Zerchers will actually help prevent forearm and bicep injuries by breaking up knots and adhesions. I know my shit feels great after a set.

22

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:
I was in the back of a Humvee reading Maxim, looking at pictures of Amber Arbucci when an IED blew up next to us and sent me to Walter Reed with 2nd and few little 3rd degree burns. Had drugged-induced dreams about her for like two weeks.

I think she at least owes me a blowjob.[/quote]

Some of those blurry lines between reality and comatose are awesome. I was in a drug induced coma after someone replaced the whiskey in a bottle with drain cleaner and I took a big swig, which dissolved my esophagus.

I’m pretty sure all of the nurses in the ICU fell in love with me cuz I was a rock star or something.
[/quote]

Dayum. I hope someone went to jail and had to fork over a big chunk of cash.

23

I injured my brain trying to follow along with prof X’s thought process.

24

[quote]on edge wrote:

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:
I was in the back of a Humvee reading Maxim, looking at pictures of Amber Arbucci when an IED blew up next to us and sent me to Walter Reed with 2nd and few little 3rd degree burns. Had drugged-induced dreams about her for like two weeks.

I think she at least owes me a blowjob.[/quote]

Some of those blurry lines between reality and comatose are awesome. I was in a drug induced coma after someone replaced the whiskey in a bottle with drain cleaner and I took a big swig, which dissolved my esophagus.

I’m pretty sure all of the nurses in the ICU fell in love with me cuz I was a rock star or something.
[/quote]

Dayum. I hope someone went to jail and had to fork over a big chunk of cash.
[/quote]

Just the big (eh, medium) chunk of cash. Which I promptly used to injure my sinuses with a mountain of cocaine.

25

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:

[quote]on edge wrote:

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:
I was in the back of a Humvee reading Maxim, looking at pictures of Amber Arbucci when an IED blew up next to us and sent me to Walter Reed with 2nd and few little 3rd degree burns. Had drugged-induced dreams about her for like two weeks.

I think she at least owes me a blowjob.[/quote]

Some of those blurry lines between reality and comatose are awesome. I was in a drug induced coma after someone replaced the whiskey in a bottle with drain cleaner and I took a big swig, which dissolved my esophagus.

I’m pretty sure all of the nurses in the ICU fell in love with me cuz I was a rock star or something.
[/quote]

Dayum. I hope someone went to jail and had to fork over a big chunk of cash.
[/quote]

Just the big (eh, medium) chunk of cash. Which I promptly used to injure my sinuses with a mountain of cocaine.
[/quote]

Seems like you had your priorities in order.

26

Got a hamstring pull while fucking a chick doggie-style.

I know I am not the only one, so go ahead all you fuckers and deny it all you want.

27

2007: Went skiing with my best friend and our wives. The last run of the day I decided I was going to get some air off of a jump. Pointed my skis straight down the hill at the start and didn’t cut a single turn until I popped off the top. It was dusk, so visibility was pretty poor, and I got disoriented in the air. Landed with my weight too far back and my right ski shattered. Right boot dug into the snow and popped my femur out of the socket.

What followed was without question the worst pain I’ve ever felt in my life. Still makes me queasy to think about it. Some little kid went and got the ski patrol, and I laid there in the snow for what seemed like an hour until they got there.

They put me on a sled and GINGERLY took me down the hill. Every bump and turn felt like hot knives in my hip. Then I got laid on a table while we waited for the ambulance.

The ambulance ride was the worst. It seemed like all of Western NY was covered in fucking potholes and the driver was determined to hit every last one of them. On the way to the hospital, the medic examined my hip. He saw something odd sticking up and pushed on it, and it disappeared behind my pelvis. The thing he pushed on was the head of my femur, and if I could have managed it, I would have thrown the guy out of the back of the vehicle. WORST. PAIN. EVER.

Anyhow, long story short, they took me to the hospital, gave me some awesome pain meds, then put me out so they could put Humpty Dumpty back together again. I spent the next 2 weeks on pretty heavy pain meds, and didn’t really come off of them for a month.

2 surgeries, 9 combined months on crutches, and probably 18 months of rehab later and the hip still wasn’t right. Never will be either. I am consoled by the fact that I managed to hit a 605 all-time deadlift PR, 650 single ply squat, and 575 raw squat after the injury. Probably dumb to be lifting like that but I can’t help myself. It’s what I do.

2009: This one really wasn’t my fault…it was my bachelor party. My best friend (same guy as above) and I were out on a boat with another buddy and a few girls. I went out to go tubing, had my run, and was swimming back to the boat. Right as I was about to get on the platform, the guy driving the boat accidentally bumped the boat into reverse. The boat backed over me and my legs got pulled into the prop.

Fortunately, the dumbass that fucked up immediately recognized what he did and hit the kill switch. The boat was probably in reverse for a second or two. I got out of the water and sat on the back for a minute or so to collect myself. Had a few deep gashes on my left leg, my trunks were shredded all the way up to my junk, and my right calf hurt like a motherfucker. It had gotten thumped with the flat side of the prop about a dozen or so times. Over the next several minutes it swelled to the point where I couldn’t walk on it.

After we got off the boat (a few hours later…I soothed my wounds with about a dozen beers), we spent the next 90 minutes driving around Cleveland to find a set of crutches so I could get around. And that is how I spent the rest of my bachelor party: at a strip club…on crutches. at a pool bar…on crutches. It was pretty hilarious at the time, and I still get a chuckle out of it to this day. My wife doesn’t find it nearly so amusing, since I was, after all, nearly castrated by a fucking speedboat.

28

^Metal.

29

[quote]Steel Nation wrote:
2007: Went skiing with my best friend and our wives. The last run of the day I decided I was going to get some air off of a jump. Pointed my skis straight down the hill at the start and didn’t cut a single turn until I popped off the top. It was dusk, so visibility was pretty poor, and I got disoriented in the air. Landed with my weight too far back and my right ski shattered. Right boot dug into the snow and popped my femur out of the socket.

What followed was without question the worst pain I’ve ever felt in my life. Still makes me queasy to think about it. Some little kid went and got the ski patrol, and I laid there in the snow for what seemed like an hour until they got there.

They put me on a sled and GINGERLY took me down the hill. Every bump and turn felt like hot knives in my hip. Then I got laid on a table while we waited for the ambulance.

The ambulance ride was the worst. It seemed like all of Western NY was covered in fucking potholes and the driver was determined to hit every last one of them. On the way to the hospital, the medic examined my hip. He saw something odd sticking up and pushed on it, and it disappeared behind my pelvis. The thing he pushed on was the head of my femur, and if I could have managed it, I would have thrown the guy out of the back of the vehicle. WORST. PAIN. EVER.

Anyhow, long story short, they took me to the hospital, gave me some awesome pain meds, then put me out so they could put Humpty Dumpty back together again. I spent the next 2 weeks on pretty heavy pain meds, and didn’t really come off of them for a month.

2 surgeries, 9 combined months on crutches, and probably 18 months of rehab later and the hip still wasn’t right. Never will be either. I am consoled by the fact that I managed to hit a 605 all-time deadlift PR, 650 single ply squat, and 575 raw squat after the injury. Probably dumb to be lifting like that but I can’t help myself. It’s what I do.

2009: This one really wasn’t my fault…it was my bachelor party. My best friend (same guy as above) and I were out on a boat with another buddy and a few girls. I went out to go tubing, had my run, and was swimming back to the boat. Right as I was about to get on the platform, the guy driving the boat accidentally bumped the boat into reverse. The boat backed over me and my legs got pulled into the prop.

Fortunately, the dumbass that fucked up immediately recognized what he did and hit the kill switch. The boat was probably in reverse for a second or two. I got out of the water and sat on the back for a minute or so to collect myself. Had a few deep gashes on my left leg, my trunks were shredded all the way up to my junk, and my right calf hurt like a motherfucker. It had gotten thumped with the flat side of the prop about a dozen or so times. Over the next several minutes it swelled to the point where I couldn’t walk on it.

After we got off the boat (a few hours later…I soothed my wounds with about a dozen beers), we spent the next 90 minutes driving around Cleveland to find a set of crutches so I could get around. And that is how I spent the rest of my bachelor party: at a strip club…on crutches. at a pool bar…on crutches. It was pretty hilarious at the time, and I still get a chuckle out of it to this day. My wife doesn’t find it nearly so amusing, since I was, after all, nearly castrated by a fucking speedboat.[/quote]

I see by your avi you have let that boating accident in which you nearly died affect your physique goals.

30

[quote]Testy1 wrote:

[quote]Steel Nation wrote:
2007: Went skiing with my best friend and our wives. The last run of the day I decided I was going to get some air off of a jump. Pointed my skis straight down the hill at the start and didn’t cut a single turn until I popped off the top. It was dusk, so visibility was pretty poor, and I got disoriented in the air. Landed with my weight too far back and my right ski shattered. Right boot dug into the snow and popped my femur out of the socket.

What followed was without question the worst pain I’ve ever felt in my life. Still makes me queasy to think about it. Some little kid went and got the ski patrol, and I laid there in the snow for what seemed like an hour until they got there.

They put me on a sled and GINGERLY took me down the hill. Every bump and turn felt like hot knives in my hip. Then I got laid on a table while we waited for the ambulance.

The ambulance ride was the worst. It seemed like all of Western NY was covered in fucking potholes and the driver was determined to hit every last one of them. On the way to the hospital, the medic examined my hip. He saw something odd sticking up and pushed on it, and it disappeared behind my pelvis. The thing he pushed on was the head of my femur, and if I could have managed it, I would have thrown the guy out of the back of the vehicle. WORST. PAIN. EVER.

Anyhow, long story short, they took me to the hospital, gave me some awesome pain meds, then put me out so they could put Humpty Dumpty back together again. I spent the next 2 weeks on pretty heavy pain meds, and didn’t really come off of them for a month.

2 surgeries, 9 combined months on crutches, and probably 18 months of rehab later and the hip still wasn’t right. Never will be either. I am consoled by the fact that I managed to hit a 605 all-time deadlift PR, 650 single ply squat, and 575 raw squat after the injury. Probably dumb to be lifting like that but I can’t help myself. It’s what I do.

2009: This one really wasn’t my fault…it was my bachelor party. My best friend (same guy as above) and I were out on a boat with another buddy and a few girls. I went out to go tubing, had my run, and was swimming back to the boat. Right as I was about to get on the platform, the guy driving the boat accidentally bumped the boat into reverse. The boat backed over me and my legs got pulled into the prop.

Fortunately, the dumbass that fucked up immediately recognized what he did and hit the kill switch. The boat was probably in reverse for a second or two. I got out of the water and sat on the back for a minute or so to collect myself. Had a few deep gashes on my left leg, my trunks were shredded all the way up to my junk, and my right calf hurt like a motherfucker. It had gotten thumped with the flat side of the prop about a dozen or so times. Over the next several minutes it swelled to the point where I couldn’t walk on it.

After we got off the boat (a few hours later…I soothed my wounds with about a dozen beers), we spent the next 90 minutes driving around Cleveland to find a set of crutches so I could get around. And that is how I spent the rest of my bachelor party: at a strip club…on crutches. at a pool bar…on crutches. It was pretty hilarious at the time, and I still get a chuckle out of it to this day. My wife doesn’t find it nearly so amusing, since I was, after all, nearly castrated by a fucking speedboat.[/quote]

I see by your avi you have let that boating accident in which you nearly died affect your physique goals.
[/quote]

Best Post

31

Nothing as bad as you guys but when I first learned about drop sets and partial reps, I applied it straight away to my next deadlift session. Being a newbie with shitty technique and HIT mentality you can imagine how it went. My lower back is fucked since, even a sneeze can cripple me for a week nowadays if I don’t brace myself for it.

32

[quote]MaximusB wrote:
Got a hamstring pull while fucking a chick doggie-style.

I know I am not the only one, so go ahead all you fuckers and deny it all you want.[/quote]
Did you finish?

Damn Max have you increased your mobility since then?

33

Steel’s my idol sheer badass all around. I got a foot cramp getting a bj yesterday,maximus, I finished played it off like I was gonna orgasm ahha.

34

No I didn’t finish, I had to push her fat ass forward and extend my leg to do a MacGyver style hamstring stretch.

She looked at me like wtf , I thought I should explain what a charlie horse is, but it would not give me cover from throwing her forward on her face.

35

“pull a damn ham-strang tryin’ to put it on ya”

-flo rida

36

I do believe we have all experienced the pains of love making.

I got my own little injury I would like to share with you all. About ten years ago at the tender age of 14 I used to be big into motocross. I honestly thought I could have been the next big pro. I was decent at it and had a few races. Unfortunately it cost way too much money with gear, race fees and constant repairs to the bike. I went to a local track one day and my carb was acting up. It would flood the engine with gas if I pinned it for too long and the engine would choke which is really bad if your on the kind of track I was.

Like an idiot I kept riding and there was this one double that to clear it I had to hit it in fourth gear pinned. Well right at the take off of the double my engine chokes and throws me into/maybe over the bars can really remember I was probably doing 30 mphs maybe a little more. Next thing I know I am on the landing getting up dusting myself off when I notice this huge gaping gash in my left arm and blood all over my riding pants. No pain but I still freaked the fuck out.

Rod to the local hospital where they air lifted me to johns hopkins for emergency surgery. They fixed up nice but I have a pretty gnarly scar. You can probably see it in my avi if you look. Its right below the elbow joint on the forearm. I swear since it has healed I have had super human grip strength in my left hand.

37

Once, when I was drunk.

38

[quote]A-rod wrote:
I do believe we have all experienced the pains of love making.
[/quote]
lol, I actually thought I had given myself a hernia once…

39

Many years ago I installed a chinning bar in my basement. I was standing on a weight bench when I slipped and fell back onto the bench press rack (you know, the “Y” shaped thing at the top), and it damn near went into my ass. That soft skin on the way in got tore up though.

40

Riding my bike around my house,with shut eyes,on the third lap,I crashed into a building,and next thing I know I’m in d air for a split second,and then on the ground the next.and then I had a deep gash on my foot,shit hurt for days.
Playing with a bad steel gate, and then the whole thing just falls on me,flattening me.