how to cheat a blood test

a few weeks back i went to get my levels checked (see issue 213 by cy wilson “level with me doc, how long do i got?”), and my doctor said that i needed to cut my protein WAY back because my bun/creatinine ratio was to high. now, i am a big red meat eater and take creatine, and i have also read that muscle breakdown can cause the ratio to go up, so im not to worried about anything. well they want me to come back in to “make sure i cut my protein,” so i was wondering, if i take 2 high carb days and limit my protein intake to 4 oz per serving for 2 days, while eating no red meat and laying off the creatine, will this help get the ratio down and get the doc off my back? right now i eat 6-8 oz per serving on very low carbs. (im not sure the exact gram total, im estimating it will drop about 40-50 grams, or 80-100 in the 2 days.)

Get a new doctor.

I’ve never been in this type of situation before, but if I had to, I would consume tons and tons of colon cleanse for a few days before the blood test. I’m thinking that way, all the protein is pushed out and whatever you have backed up is all gone.

Demo Dick is 99% correct. I would, however, like to add to his statement:


“Get a new doctor, tell this one that he is an ignorant asshole, and then tell everyone you know not to go to him.”

Did you tell your dr. you were taking creatine? Creatine can cause creatinine levels to go up. Being dehydrated can also cause B.U.N. to go up (at least according to my Dr.) If you want everything to check out ok on your next blood draw it’s probably a good idea to lay off the creatine for a while, drink tons of water, cut down on protein for a few days before the test, and avoid heavy training for a few days prior.

Bro, your doctor works for you! Listen to his advice, check the numbers from the blood work, do your own research, and make up your OWN mind on how to proceed. If your doctor doesn’t like it, FUCK HIM (not literally like that Moose fag, of course)!

yes, i told the dr. everything i was taking, and i had a plan, but it kind of backfired. i was going to finish my strength phase on a monday, take the rest of the week off and get tested on that friday. however, my allergies have been acting up and i have to go in to get them checked, so he kind of pressured me in to getting re-tested. i already drink 2 gallons a day, but i might go up to 3 the day before and the day of. and like i said, im going to bump my carbs way up, and cut the protein in half. in fact, i might take a cheat meal the day of, say some pizza right before i go to help just a bit. and yes, i will lay off the creatine for those two days, along with a few other things.