Cheating: How Did You Deal...

Off Topic
281

Eating is not cheating.

Other than that and generally speaking: if she cheated on me I’d like to know the circumstances. I can be pretty draconic if need be, but I also know that life’s not black and white and I wouldn’t necessarily be hurt. A one-time deal wouldn’t be a relationship killer for me. It’s gotta be said, though, that I’m only in a relationship with a woman if I really respect her. Other than that, she’d just be a fuck buddy.

I’m married, now. And she’s playing for both teams. Which I approve of. Jealousy has become very foreign to me. Maybe I’ve lost my soul? I’m an atheist. My father was Christian. My mother was forced to be a Muslim, but she ‘dropped out’. My aunt, whose tits I always wanted to fondle when I was 14 years old, is Jewish.

282

[quote]Totenkopf wrote:
You’re a beautiful woman (judging from your avatar) and from the post I read from you, you have a good head on your shoulder. [/quote]

Slightly OT but I need to second this. If I didn’t have a girlfriend I’d have a massive internet crush on theBeth. Just saying.

284

[quote]FattyFat wrote:
Eating is not cheating.

Other than that and generally speaking: if she cheated on me I’d like to know the circumstances. I can be pretty draconic if need be, but I also know that life’s not black and white and I wouldn’t necessarily be hurt. A one-time deal wouldn’t be a relationship killer for me. It’s gotta be said, though, that I’m only in a relationship with a woman if I really respect her. Other than that, she’d just be a fuck buddy.

I’m married, now. And she’s playing for both teams. Which I approve of. Jealousy has become very foreign to me. Maybe I’ve lost my soul? I’m an atheist. My father was Christian. My mother was forced to be a Muslim, but she ‘dropped out’. My aunt, whose tits I always wanted to fondle when I was 14 years old, is Jewish.
[/quote]

Mother of god, this post summerized my views on this issue period. Except for motorboating your aunt. Perhaps we have lost our souls. Or are we simply afraid of commitment?

Never understood how jealousy could consume the majority of this world at at least one point in their lives and blind them to one unique need of the person they love most. I’ve always believed that if you truely love someone, you will set them free. You will want them to do what they need in order to be happy, even if this means you need to be entirely selfless. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

Remember Maslow’s theory of human motivation. At the lowest physiological level in the hierarchy are breathing, food, water, sex, sleep, homeostasis, and excretion. You don’t eat tuna and rice every day. Why should she/he/anyone?

285

[quote]nighthawkz wrote:

[quote]Totenkopf wrote:
You’re a beautiful woman (judging from your avatar) and from the post I read from you, you have a good head on your shoulder. [/quote]

Slightly OT but I need to second this. If I didn’t have a girlfriend I’d have a massive internet crush on theBeth. Just saying.[/quote]
Yes. Nice, atheltic body and that Tegan and Sara haircut? Oh Lawdy!

286

[quote]Totenkopf wrote:

[quote]nighthawkz wrote:

[quote]Totenkopf wrote:
You’re a beautiful woman (judging from your avatar) and from the post I read from you, you have a good head on your shoulder. [/quote]

Slightly OT but I need to second this. If I didn’t have a girlfriend I’d have a massive internet crush on theBeth. Just saying.[/quote]
Yes. Nice, atheltic body and that Tegan and Sara haircut? Oh Lawdy![/quote]

Gentlemen, you flatter me.

I thought only lesbians knew about Tegan and Sara. I was hoping it was more like Noomi Rapace in Girl With the Dragon tattoo…

287

[quote]theBeth wrote:

[quote]Totenkopf wrote:

[quote]nighthawkz wrote:

[quote]Totenkopf wrote:
You’re a beautiful woman (judging from your avatar) and from the post I read from you, you have a good head on your shoulder. [/quote]

Slightly OT but I need to second this. If I didn’t have a girlfriend I’d have a massive internet crush on theBeth. Just saying.[/quote]
Yes. Nice, atheltic body and that Tegan and Sara haircut? Oh Lawdy![/quote]

Gentlemen, you flatter me.

I thought only lesbians knew about Tegan and Sara. I was hoping it was more like Noomi Rapace in Girl With the Dragon tattoo…[/quote]
Ermahgawd. I’m a huge Tegan and Sara fan and it’s like cruel joke that they are Lesbians because they are right up my alley. I was obsessed with their last album and put it on blast for 3 months straight in my car. I googled your reference and yes, I can see it now,lol.

288

Tegan and Sara for those who are not up-to-date on the Indie music scene.

289

[quote]Totenkopf wrote:
Tegan and Sara for those who are not up-to-date on the Indie music scene.[/quote]

290

[quote]theBeth wrote:
To be perfectly honest, the only thing really hurt is my pride. I’ve exercised poor judgement with my choices and this is the outcome. Sorry about what you went through. So did you find someone even better?[/quote]

I completely missed this… I can relate to it. Basically (correct me if I’m wrong) you’re embarassed because you should have known better. Been there, done that. The feeling will simply fade over time. It’s ok. As they say, fool me once…

291

[quote]nighthawkz wrote:

[quote]theBeth wrote:
To be perfectly honest, the only thing really hurt is my pride. I’ve exercised poor judgement with my choices and this is the outcome. Sorry about what you went through. So did you find someone even better?[/quote]

I completely missed this… I can relate to it. Basically (correct me if I’m wrong) you’re embarassed because you should have known better. Been there, done that. The feeling will simply fade over time. It’s ok. As they say, fool me once…
[/quote]

Yes I should have known better, but my pride was hurt because I couldn’t imagine why anyone would cheat on me. Especially since I was so good to him.

292

[quote]theBeth wrote:
Yes I should have known better, but my pride was hurt because I couldn’t imagine why anyone would cheat on me. Especially since I was so good to him.[/quote]

From all that we know about him, that guy was an idiot. This wasn’t about you, this was about his inability to keep his dick in his pants. If you’d been in the same room at the time he might’ve even preferred you - who knows, does it matter? Him cheating had nothing to do with your qualities… At all.

293

[quote]theBeth wrote:

[quote]nighthawkz wrote:

[quote]theBeth wrote:
To be perfectly honest, the only thing really hurt is my pride. I’ve exercised poor judgement with my choices and this is the outcome. Sorry about what you went through. So did you find someone even better?[/quote]

I completely missed this… I can relate to it. Basically (correct me if I’m wrong) you’re embarassed because you should have known better. Been there, done that. The feeling will simply fade over time. It’s ok. As they say, fool me once…
[/quote]

Yes I should have known better, but my pride was hurt because I couldn’t imagine why anyone would cheat on me. Especially since I was so good to him.[/quote]
Hey, people do stupid things. I was so good to this girl I thought I was going to marry but she ended up running with the wrong crowd and started doing coke and ended up dumping me and stripping. These people are irrational, stupid, and childish. They are apparently on a different plane of thought and maturity level.

294

See I loved one girl, but I thought about a million of 'em
Now I got a million of 'em
Don’t love any of 'em
Don’t it always seem to go
That you got a good thing
But you still want more

296

Yes, been there, unfortunately. My pride and my heart were both hurt.

297

[quote]pushharder wrote:

[quote]theBeth wrote:

…my pride was hurt because I couldn’t imagine why anyone would cheat on me. Especially since I was so good to h(er).

[/quote]

Yep.[/quote]

You should be proud of me from refraining from drunk texting/dialing your wife friday night.

298

[quote]theBeth wrote:

[quote]pushharder wrote:

[quote]theBeth wrote:

…my pride was hurt because I couldn’t imagine why anyone would cheat on me. Especially since I was so good to h(er).

[/quote]

Yep.[/quote]

You should be proud of me from refraining from drunk texting/dialing your wife friday night. [/quote]

I could see him being disappointed about that… =p

299

[quote]FattyFat wrote:
Eating is not cheating.
[/quote]

.

300

[quote]Chushin wrote:

[quote]SmilingPolitely wrote:

[quote]theBeth wrote:

[quote]SmilingPolitely wrote:

[quote]Ronan wrote:

[quote]SmilingPolitely wrote:

[quote]csulli wrote:

[quote]HeavyTriple wrote:

[quote]theBeth wrote:

[quote]HeavyTriple wrote:
“everything but the sex sucked”

“I can count on the fingers of one hand the number of times I actually had an orgasm with him”

…lolwut?[/quote]

The sex was a kinky adrenalin rush. But as far as me getting off, I have to open up to someone for that and frankly, his personality turned me off. It’s a trust thing too. Intuitively I knew I couldn’t trust him. I shouldn’t have let it drag out like it did.

[/quote]

I think I’m going to have a hard time understanding this no matter how much you explain it. In my mind, sex with an orgasm and sex without one aren’t comparable. The latter scenario might be OK, but can’t measure up to the former.[/quote]
In the latter scenario I would rather have just not had sex at all.[/quote]

WTF?! If you do not derive pleasure from getting your partner off, you are not emotionally mature enough to be in a sexual relationship.

I am admittedly spoiled rotten with orgasms, but every so often I just won’t get there for one reason or another. And in those times, when he collapses on top of me and the two of us are sweaty and breathing heavy I have NEVER thought, “Man, that was pointless”. Cumming may be the end goal, but the rest of it is a fucking awesome way to pass the time.[/quote]

werent you the lady a few years back struggling with orgasms? I think it was you. now you have them all the time. what changed?[/quote]

I wasn’t struggling alone, but to let go enough with someone else was a different story. After getting out of the bad relationship I was in, I met someone who helped me with some non-traditional therapy. Then I met my boyfriend and we just clicked. The fact that he was patient with me and didn’t take the fact that it took me a while to cum as a personal afront. Once I stopped worrying about that, the pressure was gone and it has been smooth sailing :)[/quote]

Same boat. my ex gf is actually the one who brought me out of it. Then I totally regressed with this last guy. Can I ask what the non traditional therapy was?[/quote]

Back in the good old days of TN I would have been more likely to discuss this, but I am hesitant to expand on it now and invite all sorts of knuckle head comments.

I will say that “old” guys rock :)[/quote]

Thank you, SP!

(Derek – you listening?)

:-)[/quote]

Unless I misread I think smiling means she had her own “Mr. Robinson”? Sorry about that Chushin. Am I wrong thinking that Smiling?