I was going to add accessories to that thing to make it… not low volume, to say the least. But you’re right, running that program right now would probably be a bad idea.
Thanks, everyone. I really appreciate the support. I’ll try to calm my crazy brain and grow some damn muscles.
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There seems to be quite a bit of research to back up lack of sleep causing issues, some of which are hormonal in nature… by extension of this, it can affect your response to hypertrophy training.
@T3hPwnisher is a mutant (Juggernaut, specifically) so what goes for him may not apply to everyone 
, but I’ve averaged 5 to 5.5 hours sleep with poor quality for the last 6 or 7 years… it hasn’t stopped me from getting a 500lb deadlift, 400lb squat, 300lb bench, OR near 18-inch biceps. So does stress and lack of sleep impact training? Science says yes, but i think it’s dependent on personal dedication as to how much you let it impact training.
+1 to what’s been said above.
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Awesome gains 
Also, i’ve somehow missed your username before, or it didn’t register in my brain for some reason. Andrewgen receptors, pretty good lmao
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Juggernaut is not a mutant 
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Absolutely appreciate this sentiment, but Iike to emphasize how genetically average I am so people don’t write off the power of effort and consistency
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I have found basic mindfulness meditation to be extremely helpful for reducing anxiety and improving sleep, and I swear that it notably improves my results from training even though I don’t understand how that could be the case.
I would also advise hiring a coach if that is at all possible for you. This may allow you to stop analyzing and focus solely on execution, which sounds like it would be beneficial for you.
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This can’t be said enough.
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Sleep and easy life helps, but i dont think that anyone whos country is not under an attack currently, can be SOOO stressed and sleepless that his whole body changes basic biology so its probably first world problems and our bodies and brain can handle much much worse conditions, so…
From what i read, i see you gained strenght and you gained weight.
Your problem might be that you havent been gaining weight and training for size long enough. I mean… you should be doing 2-3 year cycles of gaining weight week after week. If you start to cut every time you gain a bit fat, you just remain the same.
Sure, there are better and worse genetics, but unless you are 50lbs heavier now than u were when you started, you dont get to complain that you dont gain size… Size = weight and in order to gain weight most people will have to get fat.
I was like 220lbs lean for years and tought i cant gain anymore size. Then i went on a 18month bulk, stuffed myself day in and day out, gained 45lbs, then cut and kept around 20 of em. Now im bigger than i ever was and the lesson i learned - you have to be fat and stay there for YEARS, not months.
Back in my 20’s (20+ years ago). I ate like this and never missed a training session for 5 years to gain a total of 30lbs. Maybe a little over half of that was muscle. This stuff takes years not weeks.
I notice your choice of words there were ‘sometimes more than 5000’. I am going to say that you have made some great progress based on your numbers above but possibly missing out due to consistency of eating and training.