10 Rules for Dealing with a Big Man

Training Powerlifting
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[quote]Polish Rifle wrote:
hoosegow wrote:
A buddy of mine and I were talking the other day about what we wish “normal people” knew about us. I typed it up and sent it to him. Maybe this should go into “Get a Life” but I thought more in this forum could relate. Flame away.

10 Rules for Dealing with a Big Man

To the OP,

I know I’ve read this before somewhere and the format was obviously cut and pasted.

Great read, but did you write this yourself?

I smell plagarism.[/quote]

I can honestly say I sat down and wrote every single word. I will also admit that many of the complaints are not mine alone and probably echo quite a few other complaints. I am not arrogant enough to think I have come up with a completely new rant.

Please note that I gave credit where I had obviously borrowed concepts or ideas (the slay the dragon reference gave credit to TC). So if I have no problem giving credit once, why would I have a problem doing it again? Several of these points are a result of many conversations - both verbal and internet posting. I assume many of you have had the same.

So in a nutshell, every item is not new. You’ve probably heard the topic before. I am 100% sure that if you looked at every post and article on this website, you will see some aspect of what I wrote. Plagerism, definitely not. Recycling concepts we have heard before, guilty as charged. I am not talented enough to create whole new ideas.

As stated in OP, a buddy and I were talking about the things we wished normal people new about how to treat us. I wrote down what we talked about. I had fun doing it and simply shared my take on things we have all complained about.

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[quote]hoosegow wrote:
Polish Rifle wrote:
hoosegow wrote:
A buddy of mine and I were talking the other day about what we wish “normal people” knew about us. I typed it up and sent it to him. Maybe this should go into “Get a Life” but I thought more in this forum could relate. Flame away.

10 Rules for Dealing with a Big Man

To the OP,

I know I’ve read this before somewhere and the format was obviously cut and pasted.

Great read, but did you write this yourself?

I smell plagarism.

I can honestly say I sat down and wrote every single word. I will also admit that many of the complaints are not mine alone and probably echo quite a few other complaints. I am not arrogant enough to think I have come up with a completely new rant.

Please note that I gave credit where I had obviously borrowed concepts or ideas (the slay the dragon reference gave credit to TC). So if I have no problem giving credit once, why would I have a problem doing it again?
[/quote] Thats exactly why, so you could trick us all into thinking you are great, and pulling in our trust by giving credit to TC, then stealing everything else from this post http://www.T-Nation.com/tmagnum/readTopic.do?id=2340244 Dirty trickster!

63

[quote]zephead4747 wrote:
LightsOutLuthor wrote:
It kinda got passed over there in regards to the ‘fight’ issue, and was asked and not re-addressed:

If someone 'talks sh*t" about you, how does it go?

  1. You take the bait - You pummel 'em and get called a bully, or are told “what do you expect - you’re BIGGER than him!” and are to blame.

  2. You let it slide - they continue on and ruin your day/evening/whatever by dropping those little comments as listed here - “See, he’s all size but a pussy”. “Being big doesn’t mean you’re tough!” or somesuch crap.

Most big guys know they can’t win in this situation. I also know that my ability to deadlift big weights isn’t going to help much with a living, possibly drunk human being (unless I do knock him out and have to move a body!).

But just like in the animal kingdom, size appeals to the IDEA or THREAT of power and it intimidates, as it should…but I don’t lift to be ‘tough’, and I don’t think most do.

And to anyone that missed the point and told MegaNewb to ‘go play football’ was wrong - we COVERED that it’s not about ‘playing ball’, but that poster seemed to be fairly football-centric, given his profile.

And I’ll echo the comment that ANY 15 year old who thinks he’s SEEN SO MUCH yet still thinks resorting to violence is the wise-beyond-his-years best option is lying.

I’m going to go off on this a little. I’m in highschool, I know EXACTLY how the guy feels. I had all sorts of little jealous football players (although not all of them, a lot of them are pretty tight) perpetually hanging off my nuts all year. I know what it’s like to want to smash heads in because you can only take so much.

But after so long, it really does settle out. And really your best way to resolve these situations are by letting them know you aren’t going to deal with their shit. Period. Once you give a warning, and try to solve a problem, there isn’t much else you can do.

However most people aren’t actually trying to hurt you anyways. They are just trying to make their friends laugh. A direct confrontation in front of said friends usually ends any further conflict.

Bud, take a page out of my book. I’ve been there. Fights are only fun the first few times, and when you aren’t eating cement becuase 5 guys jumped you.[/quote]

Amen dude. I played high school football (first two years, and was harassed by the coaches when I quite junior year). But I was a lineman - a biggish dude that push things and lifted heavy.

SO I didn’t have the ‘cool dude’ status of a football guy then. But oh man, should I have let more things slide. My humor is much more sly and sarcastic, but like you said, those football types would run their mouths in the DUMBEST ways:

“Hey folder!” (If you were carrying a folder, for example).

How can you logically let that bother you? But I did and it was futile like you said.

You and Newb are both mature beyond your age and just stay that way!

64

[quote]zephead4747 wrote:
And really your best way to resolve these situations are by letting them know you aren’t going to deal with their shit. Period. Once you give a warning, and try to solve a problem, there isn’t much else you can do. [/quote]

I think you’re missing a few options if you consider this to be the “best way”.

Why don’t you just turn it around and bust their balls a bit, or even have a laugh at your self? If they’re alright guys it’ll just be fun, if they’re complete assholes sooner or later they’ll find someone who gives more of a reaction to pick on.

Most people aren’t complete assholes unless you want them to be.

I’ve just noticed the “strong words” for today:
“My Father taught me how to be a man�??and not by instilling in me a sense of machismo or an agenda of dominance. He taught me that a real man doesn’t take, he gives; he doesn’t use force, he uses logic; doesn’t play the role of trouble-maker, but rather, trouble-shooter; and most importantly, a real man is defined by what’s in his heart, not his pants.�??Kevin Smith”

Hang on, Kevin Smith? Isn’t that Silent Bob?

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[quote]DragnCarry wrote:
zephead4747 wrote:
And really your best way to resolve these situations are by letting them know you aren’t going to deal with their shit. Period. Once you give a warning, and try to solve a problem, there isn’t much else you can do.

I think you’re missing a few options if you consider this to be the “best way”.

Why don’t you just turn it around and bust their balls a bit, or even have a laugh at your self? If they’re alright guys it’ll just be fun, if they’re complete assholes sooner or later they’ll find someone who gives more of a reaction to pick on.

Hang on, Kevin Smith? Isn’t that Silent Bob?[/quote]

Basically if that was the case, THey shouldn’t need advice on how to handle the situation.

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[quote]LightsOutLuthor wrote:

Amen dude. I played high school football (first two years, and was harassed by the coaches when I quite junior year). But I was a lineman - a biggish dude that push things and lifted heavy.

SO I didn’t have the ‘cool dude’ status of a football guy then. But oh man, should I have let more things slide. My humor is much more sly and sarcastic, but like you said, those football types would run their mouths in the DUMBEST ways:

“Hey folder!” (If you were carrying a folder, for example).

How can you logically let that bother you? But I did and it was futile like you said.

You and Newb are both mature beyond your age and just stay that way![/quote]

I don’t play any kind of ball anymore, and haven’t since middleschool. But our team for the most part is made up of the preppy kids who don’t do anything but join the team so they can say they’re on it. And like 5-6 good guys. It makes me sick to my stomache I used to hang out with the douchebag crowd of those guys and the stupid spoiled whores in the same group.

Not much I can do about it now.

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Good post…but I don’t see how being big makes you an Alpha Male…or allows you to “slay dragons”. There are plenty of “little” guys that will destroy a big man. Other than that…cool post.

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oh and btw…fighting solves everything. So much for wisdom. I don’t go looking for fights…in fact I’m not even that great of a fighter I don’t think. But…when people talk shit…destroy them. Don’t even talk back…just destroy them…and if you lose…try try again. Fuck talking your way out of it and fuck ignoring people.

IF there is one thing I could change in highschool it was not fighting because I was afraid of my dad being pissed and getting suspended. I feel like I took more shit than I should have…and no I wasn’t small or wimpy…just wasn’t as aggressive and angry as I am now. So take my advice kids in highschool!

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[quote]facko wrote:
oh and btw…fighting solves everything. So much for wisdom. I don’t go looking for fights…in fact I’m not even that great of a fighter I don’t think. But…when people talk shit…destroy them. Don’t even talk back…just destroy them…and if you lose…try try again. Fuck talking your way out of it and fuck ignoring people. IF there is one thing I could change in highschool it was not fighting because I was afraid of my dad being pissed and getting suspended. I feel like I took more shit than I should have…and no I wasn’t small or wimpy…just wasn’t as aggressive and angry as I am now. So take my advice kids in highschool![/quote]

Have fun in prison.

Seriously, have fun in prison. I’m assuming you’re a grown man right? In highschool that shit is easy as hell to start, and end without anyone getting in serious trouble. I hope you’re a big boy, or you’ll end up eating concrete with that view. I’m not big by any means 5’8" 185-190 pounds.

But I’m intelligent enough to use tact, becuase realisticly what is me kicking the shit out of some 6’ 130 pound underclassman wannabe hardass going to prove, Most of the people in my HS have a pretty decent level of respect for me, becuase I use my brain when I talk, and can defuse potential fights because most of the posers walking around don’t want to mess with the powerlifter. If I can make this kid eat his own words, stutter like a motherfucker and embarass the hell out of him. I look like a god, and he looks like a fool. I still win, without getting in any sort trouble.

If you have an above average IQ making average joe stutter around while you remind him of all his shortcomings in front of a bunch of people will usually end any pseudohardassedness.

Seriously, I’ve seen it all as far as highschool goes. Getting in fights all of the time is going to leave you being the angry kid who sits by himself because he’s too much of a hardass to be around other people.

Fights are really only acceptable when:
No other means can fix a situation
Someone hurt your girl
Someone hurt your family
Someone hurt your buddy
someone hurt you

/end

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[quote]zephead4747 wrote:
facko wrote:
oh and btw…fighting solves everything. So much for wisdom. I don’t go looking for fights…in fact I’m not even that great of a fighter I don’t think. But…when people talk shit…destroy them. Don’t even talk back…just destroy them…and if you lose…try try again. Fuck talking your way out of it and fuck ignoring people. IF there is one thing I could change in highschool it was not fighting because I was afraid of my dad being pissed and getting suspended. I feel like I took more shit than I should have…and no I wasn’t small or wimpy…just wasn’t as aggressive and angry as I am now. So take my advice kids in highschool!

Have fun in prison.

Seriously, have fun in prison. I’m assuming you’re a grown man right? In highschool that shit is easy as hell to start, and end without anyone getting in serious trouble. I hope you’re a big boy, or you’ll end up eating concrete with that view. I’m not big by any means 5’8" 185-190 pounds. But I’m intelligent enough to use tact, becuase realisticly what is me kicking the shit out of some 6’ 130 pound underclassman wannabe hardass going to prove, Most of the people in my HS have a pretty decent level of respect for me, becuase I use my brain when I talk, and can defuse potential fights because most of the posers walking around don’t want to mess with the powerlifter. If I can make this kid eat his own words, stutter like a motherfucker and embarass the hell out of him. I look like a god, and he looks like a fool. I still win, without getting in any sort trouble. If you have an above average IQ making average joe stutter around while you remind him of all his shortcomings in front of a bunch of people will usually end any pseudohardassedness.

Seriously, I’ve seen it all as far as highschool goes. Getting in fights all of the time is going to leave you being the angry kid who sits by himself because he’s too much of a hardass to be around other people.

Fights are really only acceptable when:
No other means can fix a situation
Someone hurt your girl
Someone hurt your family
Someone hurt your buddy
someone hurt you

/end[/quote]

x2…

Facko… you aren’t serious… are you? Fighting is one thing, sometimes it’s necessary. But especially in HS, you can’t go around punching people out.

I agree with above poster on the only times a fight are acceptable… except one time I did beat the shit outta a guy because he was supposed to be one of my best friends, and he started fucking and then dating my at the time girlfriend, and we loved each other (she and I… at least I thought she did)

Fighting for staring someone down is a bad idea.

My new haircut… anyone?

“One motha fucka looks at me the wrong way… I’m startin a fight… cuz I’m the FUCKIN MAN!”

lol

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[quote]kayveeay wrote:

x2…

Facko… you aren’t serious… are you? Fighting is one thing, sometimes it’s necessary. But especially in HS, you can’t go around punching people out.

I agree with above poster on the only times a fight are acceptable… except one time I did beat the shit outta a guy because he was supposed to be one of my best friends, and he started fucking and then dating my at the time girlfriend, and we loved each other (she and I… at least I thought she did)

Fighting for staring someone down is a bad idea.

My new haircut… anyone?

“One motha fucka looks at me the wrong way… I’m startin a fight… cuz I’m the FUCKIN MAN!”

lol
[/quote]

THat video rocked PROTIEN, HGH, MUSCLE MILK

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Since we are talking about fighting…

You dont lift weights to be able to beat peoples asses. You lift weights so you dont have to beat peoples ass.

The best way to win a fight is to never be in a situation where one would happen. You have nothing to gain at all, and everything to lose.

Any kids thinking about fighting should consider the fact that they will probably get arrested, could get sued, could kill the person and rot in jail through the best years of their life.

Get big, douche bags that start fights, are also cowards. They will never go for the big guy when there are smaller easier targets.

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[quote]facko wrote:
oh and btw…fighting solves everything. So much for wisdom. I don’t go looking for fights…in fact I’m not even that great of a fighter I don’t think. But…when people talk shit…destroy them. Don’t even talk back…just destroy them…and if you lose…try try again. Fuck talking your way out of it and fuck ignoring people. IF there is one thing I could change in highschool it was not fighting because I was afraid of my dad being pissed and getting suspended. I feel like I took more shit than I should have…and no I wasn’t small or wimpy…just wasn’t as aggressive and angry as I am now. So take my advice kids in highschool![/quote]

My dumbass sense is tingling.

If I fight someone, its going to be to defend my self. If I really want to fight them Il just say what ever I have to to get them to attack me first.

That or Il give them a bitch beat down, which is more like just pushing them down, bitch slaping them, kicking them, punching them in the ribs, stomach, body slam, tackle them etc. Not something that will kill them, or disfigure them. Just something to hurt them and make them shut the fuck up.

I dont think anyone on T-Nation wouldnt get a laugh out of some douche bag getting bitch slapped and knocked down when they run their mouth. however, this is no where near as bad as caving their face in, knocking teeth out etc.

Punching someone in the face or head is unacceptable unless you have to defend your self.

Maybe its just me, I feel like if I really fight someone Il end up killing them on accident or something…

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[quote]Mega Newb wrote:
facko wrote:
oh and btw…fighting solves everything. So much for wisdom. I don’t go looking for fights…in fact I’m not even that great of a fighter I don’t think. But…when people talk shit…destroy them. Don’t even talk back…just destroy them…and if you lose…try try again. Fuck talking your way out of it and fuck ignoring people. IF there is one thing I could change in highschool it was not fighting because I was afraid of my dad being pissed and getting suspended. I feel like I took more shit than I should have…and no I wasn’t small or wimpy…just wasn’t as aggressive and angry as I am now. So take my advice kids in highschool!

My dumbass sense is tingling.

If I fight someone, its going to be to defend my self. If I really want to fight them Il just say what ever I have to to get them to attack me first.

That or Il give them a bitch beat down, which is more like just pushing them down, bitch slaping them, kicking them, punching them in the ribs, stomach, body slam, tackle them etc. Not something that will kill them, or disfigure them. Just something to hurt them and make them shut the fuck up.

I dont think anyone on T-Nation wouldnt get a laugh out of some douche bag getting bitch slapped and knocked down when they run their mouth. however, this is no where near as bad as caving their face in, knocking teeth out etc.

Punching someone in the face or head is unacceptable unless you have to defend your self.

Maybe its just me, I feel like if I really fight someone Il end up killing them on accident or something…[/quote]

That’s the scary thing…I remember the last fight I was in was in High School and I remember picking the dude up and throwing him - we were about the same size, I just so happened to be way stronger (hence the point of this story) and thinking I was gonna toss him towards some lockers in a locker room. Well, I missed and he landed on a bench…and even though nothing came of it, all I could imagine was if there had been some freak accident and the dude broke his back or something.

Now, NOT fighting because you’re afraid of ‘dad’ or something like that when you’re truly harassed is a different matter. But a blanket statement like “fighting DOES/DOESN’T solve problems” is wrong.

But like I said, let’s get these facts straight:

  1. Being big doesn’t necessarily mean you are tough, or strong - but it aids in the perception of that.
  2. Being big doesn’t necessarily mean you’re a nice guy, or a jerk, but more often than not we’re big because we’re nice guys who needed to do something other than BECOME jerks.
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[quote]Mega Newb wrote:
facko wrote:

If I fight someone, its going to be to defend my self. If I really want to fight them Il just say what ever I have to to get them to attack me first.

That or Il give them a bitch beat down, which is more like just pushing them down, bitch slaping them, kicking them, punching them in the ribs, stomach, body slam, tackle them etc. Not something that will kill them, or disfigure them. Just something to hurt them and make them shut the fuck up.

I dont think anyone on T-Nation wouldnt get a laugh out of some douche bag getting bitch slapped and knocked down when they run their mouth. however, this is no where near as bad as caving their face in, knocking teeth out etc.

Punching someone in the face or head is unacceptable unless you have to defend your self.

Maybe its just me, I feel like if I really fight someone Il end up killing them on accident or something…[/quote]

AGREED…

Freshman year in highschool was basically fight club. Anyone said the wrong word and you were in a fight. If i would’ve chosen my friends circle wisely fighting would have been no problem but being "popular and “tough” was important at the time…People were scared of me and i became scared of what i turned in to. I was a ticking time bomb and if i didn’t change i was going to be in jail or a cemetery.

Tenth grade was my turnaround year, i was bigger (220lb) but not really muscular, just looked scary… i changed my friends and fights were no longer a concern to me.

Chances to fight were in my face all of the time. Kids talk a lot of shit, but i was able to carry myself with words and that would be enough to diffuse the situation.

The thought of backing out of a fight in fear of looking like a bitch is ludicrous. If you have the right crowd of friends, they will know why you did it, and if you really are a man like you claim to be, they will respect that and all your other decisions. In my school it was mostly the underclassman taking shots at higher class man to prove that they are “COOL”. I was friends with all the guys that played sport, i was very good friends with because we had a lot of shit in common. Somehow its always the small skinny guy that thinks he is “gangster”.

I only fought again senior year (last year) because i saw this guy beating this girl because she made fun of him, though i didn’t know the girl, it was breaking my moral code, it wasn’t really a fight either, more of a tackle and told him to stop, and he agreed.

I trained boxing for the mere fact that if someone was hurting anyone i cared for or myself i would be able to handle them and keep those people safe. I am no pro but i handle myself better then most kids my age…

Conclusion is :
Kids in highschool are always chasing the tittle of “Alpha”, wise choices and your attitude will give you that alpha. Most guys who are alpha don’t have to fight because they are better then that. If it comes down to survival or protection of a loved one, fighting is not out of the question, but fighting to prove you are tough is gay.

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[quote]matso1236 wrote:
In my school it was mostly the underclassman taking shots at higher class man to prove that they are “COOL”. I was friends with all the guys that played sport, i was very good friends with because we had a lot of shit in common. Somehow its always the small skinny guy that thinks he is “gangster”.

[/quote]

Yep, I almost beat the shit out of this freshmen last year. It more of less ended up with me making them out to be a pussy a locker room, because the kid wouldn’t look at me when I was talking to him. Much better ending then a 2 week suspension IMO.

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The guys who pretend to be bad asses when ur around them… happened in school alot lmao… its fun to watch them get beat up XD

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[quote]zephead4747 wrote:

Basically if that was the case, THey shouldn’t need advice on how to handle the situation.[/quote]

I couldn’t figure out your replies at all so I re-read your earlier post.

Sorry mate, I completely misunderstood what you had tried to say. Ignore me.

79

I notice a disturbing trend around the university where lots of “brah’s” are walking around with ILS and giving people dirty looks.

80

[quote]Mega Newb wrote:
facko wrote:
oh and btw…fighting solves everything. So much for wisdom. I don’t go looking for fights…in fact I’m not even that great of a fighter I don’t think. But…when people talk shit…destroy them.

Don’t even talk back…just destroy them…and if you lose…try try again. Fuck talking your way out of it and fuck ignoring people. IF there is one thing I could change in highschool it was not fighting because I was afraid of my dad being pissed and getting suspended.

I feel like I took more shit than I should have…and no I wasn’t small or wimpy…just wasn’t as aggressive and angry as I am now. So take my advice kids in highschool!

My dumbass sense is tingling.

If I fight someone, its going to be to defend my self. If I really want to fight them Il just say what ever I have to to get them to attack me first.

That or Il give them a bitch beat down, which is more like just pushing them down, bitch slaping them, kicking them, punching them in the ribs, stomach, body slam, tackle them etc. Not something that will kill them, or disfigure them. Just something to hurt them and make them shut the fuck up.

I dont think anyone on T-Nation wouldnt get a laugh out of some douche bag getting bitch slapped and knocked down when they run their mouth. however, this is no where near as bad as caving their face in, knocking teeth out etc.

Punching someone in the face or head is unacceptable unless you have to defend your self.

Maybe its just me, I feel like if I really fight someone Il end up killing them on accident or something…[/quote]

What makes you so vain to think that…? I train hard but I’m by no means a “big” guy…but I love how big guys feel as though it automatically gives them superiority over guys smaller than them. Thats not true…and you know it deep down.

If you are a tough kid you are a tough kid no matter what size you are. I actually know kids much bigger than me that really suck at fighting and on top of it aren’t tough… BTW I WAS BEING PRETTY SARCASTIC IN MY POST.

I truthfully don’t mind fighting and I mind my business…but if someone talks shit enough to piss me off…I mean repeated…I’m going to fight them…I don’t feel as though I have to be physically harmed to have the right attack someone. I mean that…if they would like to take that right away from me…then beat my ass…and then I guess I’ll just have to accept your shit talking now won’t I. Thats my view on the situation.

Also…stop throwing the coward shit around…“it takes more of a man to walk away”…sure I guess that has some truth…but it also takes a man to fight for someone or something that he is passionate about or believes in. I believe in me…and I don’t believe in being shit on by anyone…verbally or physically. But I respect your views…honestly.