I just rediscovered my gym love while training with my wife.
There is no pressure to perform, I am explaining and showing exercices and we are having some fun. Enjoying her progress on her new tiny triceps muscles as well. Last workout we had some fun with the jump rope where she is pretty good. We finish workouts with either basketball, ping pong or federball.
Anyone training with their partner? Share your experiences.
Hereās my experience
Donāt do it
Gonna second this from the woman perspective:
Also donāt do it.
This works if yāall share the same mutual interest to the same degree.
My husband cannot stand being in a gym, or anything that involves a heavy focus on strength training.
I really donāt prioritize endurance activities nearly as much as I do anything else. And I canāt stand cardio either.
He likes BMX and Trail riding. I like powerlifting and strength training/conditioning. Heās happy. Iām happy. Iām happy. Heās happy.
Itās amazing. But we have the same gym interest. Sheās been lifting for 7 years and me 10 before we met. Introduced her to a John Meadows split and we do some hard sessions together sometimes
I donāt want to know about your āhard sessionsā with the missus @aldebaran mate
I have to double down on the cardio.
My wife and I are VERY different people when it comes to physically exertion.
Iām all blood sweat and tears.
She invented low intensity interval training.
We donāt work out together anymore.
My wifeās a badass, runs 3 miles per day and now does 100 pushups per day. In 12 years ive learned sheās better off without me trying to influence her training.
I did persuade her to do rows to offset the pushups, and to use a little weight when squatting.
If you can work out together thats great, she and i do sometimes, but as far as following the same program? Never gonna happen. And thatās just fine!
Iāve heard people say ādonāt train with your SOā - I would just amend that to say ādonāt force itā. Some couples have totally different workout styles and shouldnāt work out, some couples Iāve seen at my gym working out for years and work amazingly well together. My wife and I work out sort of parallel to each other and once or twice a month actually run through a workout together, at which point my wife has had enough of my programming and goes back to her own thing again.
If you enjoy training with your SO, you should do it.
I tag along with my wife on runs when sheās willing to have a slow/leisurely run. Iāve helped her with resistance training when she wanted to do some to help improve her running. We took a college weight training course together. And weāve even run a few half marathons and 10 mile races together. But for our respective sports and interests, we train separately.
We go to the gym together, but aside from spotting the bench, we do our separate things. During the week we meet there. That way if I take to long she can leave when she wants.
For me, the only thing that is really important is that she is having fun and has a desire to be consistent.
If she wants a program, I make it minimal for her. Just include a few lifts to progress, and then tell her to do what she wants after.
Iāve found that actually training WITH the wife doesnāt work. I can train, she can train, we can even both be in the same building, but training together is a no-go. I help her with the program and spot if needed, but otherwise we gotta do our own thang.
Honorable mention: Donāt be a ātrainerā for your SO!
Sounds like we are in the same boat.
Ever recommend something to your wife for it to be easily dismissed, then later a lady gym friend has the same recommendation, and now it is a brilliant idea?
No, itās usually more self-perpetuating than that.
Le Wife (with sciatic pain post-baby): ādeadlifts hurt my back too muchā
Le Me: ākeep doing themā
Le Wife (6 months later): āI havenāt had sciatic pain in months. Iām glad my idea to keep doing deadlifts workedā
Le Me: 
I get it, as frustrating as it is. My wife and I are currently studying the same martial art together. Iāve trained martial arts off and on since I was 7 years old. Iāve tried offering my perspective a few times, but have since stopped. My wife and I are āequalsā; thatās how a marriage tends to work. In turn, itās hard for her to see me as an authority on something: Iām that same goofball she met in college. Our instructor will say the same thing and it will āclickā. I just smile and appreciate it.
Seems like Iām in the minority here, but I love training with my wife. Sheās pretty much the only person I enjoy training with, actually.
As far as actually coaching her, it works as long as Iām relatively tactful. Thereās a large education gap between us (me: mostly self-educated and self-employed, her: neuroscience Phd), which I think makes it easier for her to let me be the āsmart oneā when it comes to lifting weights.
I agree. I will admit that this:
Hasnāt already been my approach. More of āremember when Iā¦ā
There isnāt a point to that though.
It is varied depending on the topic for us. Both ways. She tries to get me to do things differently on things she knows more about and I have been stubborn in the past.
Thatās definitely a game with no winners, haha. If nothing else, I appreciate that ANOTHER authority agrees with me.
My wife and I donāt train together, in the sense that thereās no consistent plan for us to work out together. Once every week or two, one or the other of us will do the otherās day. Like sheāll do leg day with me or Iāll go to one of her classes with her. I think that keeps it low pressure enough (because you canāt really care about something youāre not training for) that we still have fun.
I do think itās important to find ways to support one another, but that may not be the same as doing those things together.
We occasionally train at the same time in the same gym (my garage). But different goals with almost no overlap in any exercise at any time. I help her out with programming and technique, she takes care of the rest. Any interference on my part would not only be futileā¦but potentially world ending.