Tiger Woods, Anti-Marriage Posterboy

Off Topic
281

I’m not going to weigh in on whether or not people should get married because frankly, it’s none of my goddamn business and each individual should make their own decision about that.

I am a little surprised by how many married people seem to think that their spouse would never do anything to hurt them in the event of a divorce because they’re “best friends”. Sure, amicable divorces happen sometimes when BOTH parties are ready to move on but what happens when one spouse comes home and says “Hey, best buddy, I’ve decided I don’t love you anymore so could you go ahead and get your shit out of my house so I can move my new best buddy in? kthanxbye.”

I love my husband and he is my best friend but I’d put him in a fucking hole if he did that to me. Betrayal is bad enough when it comes from a regular friend but from your best friend in the whole world, the one you had kids with and promised to spend the rest of your life with? I’m not seeing the happy, sappy Disney ending going down. Call me a cynic but um… bullshit.

Oh, and alimony is the most insulting and ridiculous fucking concept. There’s no goddamn good reason why some grown ass bitch can’t take care of herself. No adult deserves a piece of another adult’s income for years because they used to fuck once upon a time. Anybody who accepts alimony is a piece of shit. Hookers have more pride and self respect than some skank claiming that she can’t work because she has a fucking vagina.

282

[quote]eeu743 wrote:

[quote]attydeb2005 wrote:

[quote]eeu743 wrote:

[quote]attydeb2005 wrote:
You make a good point eeu. Prenup?[/quote]

Are u proposing?[/quote]

:-)[/quote]

It’s the crotch avatar isn’t it? I knew people liked it.[/quote]

ha! nooooo…altho i do like the quads

283

[quote]Iron Dwarf wrote:

[quote]eeu743 wrote:

[quote]EmilyQ wrote:

[quote]eeu743 wrote:

[quote]attydeb2005 wrote:

[quote]eeu743 wrote:

[quote]attydeb2005 wrote:
You make a good point eeu. Prenup?[/quote]

Are u proposing?[/quote]

:-)[/quote]

It’s the crotch avatar isn’t it? I knew people liked it.[/quote]

I think your underwear has gone out of style. :-/[/quote]

Boxer briefs are out of style? Hm, go figure. Or am I the only one who can see that I obviously pushed it up so that you could actually see my legs? It wouldn’t make much sense for me to take a leg picture where my legs were covered…[/quote]

Damn. I was hoping they were tighty whities… just for fuck’s sake.

lol[/quote]

Nope. A lot of people think they are though. The fact that they’re white probably doesn’t help lolz. But no, boxer briefs for me. They’re so comfy and they look great when you have decent legs.

284

[quote]attydeb2005 wrote:

[quote]eeu743 wrote:

[quote]attydeb2005 wrote:

[quote]eeu743 wrote:

[quote]attydeb2005 wrote:
You make a good point eeu. Prenup?[/quote]

Are u proposing?[/quote]

:-)[/quote]

It’s the crotch avatar isn’t it? I knew people liked it.[/quote]

ha! nooooo…altho i do like the quads[/quote]

:slight_smile:

285

[quote]eeu743 wrote:

[quote]attydeb2005 wrote:

[quote]eeu743 wrote:

[quote]attydeb2005 wrote:

[quote]eeu743 wrote:

[quote]attydeb2005 wrote:
You make a good point eeu. Prenup?[/quote]

Are u proposing?[/quote]

:-)[/quote]

It’s the crotch avatar isn’t it? I knew people liked it.[/quote]

ha! nooooo…altho i do like the quads[/quote]

:slight_smile:
[/quote]

Let’s see the same pic in black? And I think the boxer/briefs accentuate great quads. Feel free to PM me any variations and I’ll tell you which one works best

286

[quote]MarvelGirl wrote:
I’m not going to weigh in on whether or not people should get married because frankly, it’s none of my goddamn business and each individual should make their own decision about that.

I am a little surprised by how many married people seem to think that their spouse would never do anything to hurt them in the event of a divorce because they’re “best friends”. Sure, amicable divorces happen sometimes when BOTH parties are ready to move on but what happens when one spouse comes home and says “Hey, best buddy, I’ve decided I don’t love you anymore so could you go ahead and get your shit out of my house so I can move my new best buddy in? kthanxbye.”

I love my husband and he is my best friend but I’d put him in a fucking hole if he did that to me. Betrayal is bad enough when it comes from a regular friend but from your best friend in the whole world, the one you had kids with and promised to spend the rest of your life with? I’m not seeing the happy, sappy Disney ending going down. Call me a cynic but um… bullshit.

Oh, and alimony is the most insulting and ridiculous fucking concept. There’s no goddamn good reason why some grown ass bitch can’t take care of herself. No adult deserves a piece of another adult’s income for years because they used to fuck once upon a time. Anybody who accepts alimony is a piece of shit. Hookers have more pride and self respect than some skank claiming that she can’t work because she has a fucking vagina.

[/quote]

sniff This was just so…beautiful…

287

I can’t even wrap my head around the numbers at play in something like this. Theoretically, sure, but actually no. The scale of the exchange is just mind blowing. Having enough money as personal wealth for a settlement like that to even be possible is incomprehensible to me.

If you have ever gotten short changed by a cashier and noticed that you got change for a ten back when you paid with a twenty, then you probably can’t either.

Likewise, some people can’t comprehend or are not capable of the trust and vulnerability required to feel safe in a marriage, regardless of net worth. Those are not characteristics that money can buy, or that lack of money increases.

288

[quote]MarvelGirl wrote:
I’m not going to weigh in on whether or not people should get married because frankly, it’s none of my goddamn business and each individual should make their own decision about that.

I am a little surprised by how many married people seem to think that their spouse would never do anything to hurt them in the event of a divorce because they’re “best friends”. Sure, amicable divorces happen sometimes when BOTH parties are ready to move on but what happens when one spouse comes home and says “Hey, best buddy, I’ve decided I don’t love you anymore so could you go ahead and get your shit out of my house so I can move my new best buddy in? kthanxbye.”

I love my husband and he is my best friend but I’d put him in a fucking hole if he did that to me. Betrayal is bad enough when it comes from a regular friend but from your best friend in the whole world, the one you had kids with and promised to spend the rest of your life with? I’m not seeing the happy, sappy Disney ending going down. Call me a cynic but um… bullshit.

Oh, and alimony is the most insulting and ridiculous fucking concept. There’s no goddamn good reason why some grown ass bitch can’t take care of herself. No adult deserves a piece of another adult’s income for years because they used to fuck once upon a time. Anybody who accepts alimony is a piece of shit. Hookers have more pride and self respect than some skank claiming that she can’t work because she has a fucking vagina.

[/quote]

So you’re saying…what? That you would both put your husband “in the hole” and that you would never disgrace yourself by taking another’s income? Would there be a contradiction here?

At any rate, I’m not sure what point you’re proving. I don’t see people saying their spouses wouldn’t hurt them. Speaking for myself, if we get to the point of divorce it’s already hurting. Shit, even without it’s sometimes miserably painful. I can’t even count the number of times my husband has made me cry, and I’m not weepy. He can be a complete fuckhead and we’ve definitely gotten close enough a couple of times to begin talking about who should move out and to where.

I’m saying character doesn’t change. If my husband cheated on me I’d be furious. But I don’t see myself devoting my life to harming him in return. How I know this is that I haven’t behaved vindictively toward others who’ve hurt me in the past and I tend to want to turn a new page very quickly. So I see myself lashing out viciously–but verbally, not legally–until we achieved physical separation and then wanting to finish it and move on.

And then there’s HIS character. If he cheated on me he’d feel badly because that’s the kind of guy he is. So I would imagine he would bend over backwards to accommodate me in a divorce. He’d figure it was fair, and I suspect he’d just want it over and done with so he could move on with his new…er, ho.

When my mother left my father for a new gig she took her clothes and a couple of towels. That was fair. He had the kids, the house, etc. I’m not living in a fantasy world where all people behave well and no one ever hurts anyone.

That fretful, paranoid people want to paint those of us who don’t live our lives in a state of perpetual anxiety as naive children does not make us so. Disney ending? No. I just expect us to behave essentially as we always have once the dust settles. A coworker’s ex-husband has been passing along warnings about speed traps on my way to and from work. They’re friends and they talk more days than not. I hung out with them a few weeks ago at what used to be their lake cabin, but is now hers. He keeps his boat there. He drinks a lot and was apparently serially unfaithful. As soon as she felt that the kids were old enough for her to manage alone, she left. There’s nothing Disney-esque about a marriage that fails because one partner keeps getting shitfaced and fucking other people. But he’s a pretty nice guy in other ways and she’s apparently not a big grudge holder, so they’re friends now and do stuff together with their kids. Possibly the man cares more about his family than his former lake house.

Obviously I’ve met people from the other end of the spectrum, too. I don’t deny they exist. Why should I? Cognitive flexibility FTW.

289

Regardless of whether we agree on marriage or not, and going slightly off topic, i do get the feeling that there are a lot of guys on here who have varying degrees of commitment phobia. At the end of the day, when u look at it objectively, a lot of people do fucked up things to each others in relationships. Having said that, you could be in that 50% that doesn’t get divorced. It’s all about finding the right person, at the right time, and taking that chance.

Sure, you could end up being completely miserable. But i question whether u can ever be truly happy without taking that chance in life. A lot of u guys seem kind of anti-women out of some misguided combination of pride/ego and fear. Not all marriages end in some kind of rinsing of the man’s wealth. I’ll stop rambling now.

290

Emily, several people on this thread have said that their divorce would be amicable, should it happen. I read the whole damn thread, if you want to take the comment personally fine, but don’t give me that “Nobody said that” bullshit.

I don’t see the contradiction between admitting that I am a human being with feelings and I might be furious enough to resort to physical violence at a massive betrayal and also stating that weeks or even months after the fact that I would not set womens rights back decades by standing up in a court and making the statement that my vagina prevents me from supporting myself.

Also, I’m laughing my ass off at your idea that your husband would give you whatever you wanted if he was fucking around on you. Yeah, right, you’re sure he’s a great guy but if he happens to not be a great guy and ends up being the kind of guy who fucks around on his wife, he’ll keep pretending to be a great guy through your divorce. LOL, keep dreaming.

I’m a little confused as to why you brag about cognitive flexibility. Obviously, I don’t hate marriage. I’ve been happily married for 10 years but I’m not about to pretend that my husband and I are robots who will never change and handle a separation with cold detachment. That’s called reality.

291

[quote]FlameofOsiris wrote:
Yeah, you’re right, that completely and utterly justifies his wife essentially kidnapping his children and claiming physical abuse was rampant during their marriage. [/quote]

What? Who the fuck said it did?

All I said was that, in light of some new information, I’d have to reconsider everything this guy just said as possibly suspect.

How you got that the response “utterly justifies” his wife’s behavior (if he’s even being completely honest about that) I have no idea. Also, this guy is a screenname on a website - how could anyone possibly know if he’s being straight, or completely full of shit? In which case, maybe his wife hasn’t done anything like what he’s described.

Not saying that’s what he’s doing, but certainly no one knows for sure.

292

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]MarvelGirl wrote:
I’m not going to weigh in on whether or not people should get married because frankly, it’s none of my goddamn business and each individual should make their own decision about that.

I am a little surprised by how many married people seem to think that their spouse would never do anything to hurt them in the event of a divorce because they’re “best friends”. Sure, amicable divorces happen sometimes when BOTH parties are ready to move on but what happens when one spouse comes home and says “Hey, best buddy, I’ve decided I don’t love you anymore so could you go ahead and get your shit out of my house so I can move my new best buddy in? kthanxbye.”

I love my husband and he is my best friend but I’d put him in a fucking hole if he did that to me. Betrayal is bad enough when it comes from a regular friend but from your best friend in the whole world, the one you had kids with and promised to spend the rest of your life with? I’m not seeing the happy, sappy Disney ending going down. Call me a cynic but um… bullshit.

Oh, and alimony is the most insulting and ridiculous fucking concept. There’s no goddamn good reason why some grown ass bitch can’t take care of herself. No adult deserves a piece of another adult’s income for years because they used to fuck once upon a time. Anybody who accepts alimony is a piece of shit. Hookers have more pride and self respect than some skank claiming that she can’t work because she has a fucking vagina.

[/quote]

sniff This was just so…beautiful…[/quote]

You know what? You sound really chickish. I’ve seen this before…

Chick: I want to look like you but I don’t want to build too much muscle!
Me: Oh, don’t worry, you won’t. Women don’t build muscle easily. You’ll just be nicely defined.
Chick: No, I don’t want to bulk up. Besides, muscle turns to fat if you ever stop!
Me: No, muscle mass just decreases. When people maintain the same body weight without maintaining muscle, it’s because they’re gaining fat. If you don’t continue eating as if you’re working out after you stop lifting, that won’t happen. You won’t gain fat.
Chick: Digs in, gets shrill.
Me: You know what? You’re probably right. Lifting isn’t for you.

This person reacts with glee to anyone who interjects that she knew a chick who got huge and then fat. Why glee? I don’t know.

Chick: I want to look and feel like you. But aren’t you afraid you’ll damage your knees running? I don’t want to wind up hurt.
Me: Most people with blown knees get them because they’re overweight and sedentary. I can run across town without any problem. I’m stronger because I run, not weaker.
Chick: Yeah, I ran once and it definitely hurt my knees.
Me: A slow, steady progression will prevent that.
Chick: Digs in, gets shrill.
Me: You know what? You’re probably right. Running isn’t for you.

This person reacts with glee to anyone who interjects that she knew a chick who got hurt running. Why glee? I don’t know.

Chick: I want the benefits of a close and intimate relationship with the legal benefits that accompany marriage. But what if she takes my stuff?
Me: Nah, man, you just have to make good choices. Don’t choose a partner who prioritizes material things. Find someone who’s gracious even when hurt. They won’t fuck you over.
Chick: But you can’t tell! I read in the news that blah blah blah!
Me: I see people make good choices all the time and when things go south, they work it out.
Chick: Digs in, gets shrill.
Me: You know what? You’re probably right. Marriage isn’t for you.

This person reacts with glee to anyone who interjects that she knew someone who got fucked in a divorce. Why glee? I don’t know.

Can you explain?

293

[quote]EmilyQ wrote:

Can you explain?

[/quote]

No.

I agreed with what she wrote…both times now. Why would I need to explain anything any further than that?

She’s right. You’re wrong. There have been several people in this thread acting like their marriages are so airtight that should a divorce happen, they know with 100% certainty that their significant other won’t screw them over in court.

That line of thinking isn’t even rational.

You have decided to make this personal…even though I keep avoiding some all out attack on you that most here should know I am capable of. In other words, I am going very easy on you at the moment because your ideas put forth so far suck…but arguing back and forth with irrationality is just a waste of time.

Bottom line, neither you nor anyone else here can predict the future no matter how well you THINK you know someone else.

Therefore, it makes sense to protect your assets.

It makes ZERO SENSE not to.

294

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]EmilyQ wrote:

Can you explain?

[/quote]

No.

I agreed with what she wrote…both times now. Why would I need to explain anything any further than that?

She’s right. You’re wrong. There have been several people in this thread acting like their marriages are so airtight that should a divorce happen, they know with 100% certainty that their significant other won’t screw them over in court.

That line of thinking isn’t even rational.

You have decided to make this personal…even though I keep avoiding some all out attack on you that most here should know I am capable of. In other words, I am going very easy on you at the moment because your ideas put forth so far suck…but arguing back and forth with irrationality is just a waste of time.

Bottom line, neither you nor anyone else here can predict the future no matter how well you THINK you know someone else.

Therefore, it makes sense to protect your assets.

It makes ZERO SENSE not to.[/quote]

No U

V

295

Let’s sew this up right now.

!) Yes X - you absolutely should protect your assets if and when you choose to get married. No question, with a home and cash assets, you would be stupid not to protect yourself.

  1. No one can know with 100 % certainty what will happen to their relationship in the future.

  2. Professor X is BIGGER THAN YOU!!!

And that about sums it up. : )

296

[quote]MarvelGirl wrote:
I’m not going to weigh in on whether or not people should get married because frankly, it’s none of my goddamn business and each individual should make their own decision about that.

I am a little surprised by how many married people seem to think that their spouse would never do anything to hurt them in the event of a divorce because they’re “best friends”. Sure, amicable divorces happen sometimes when BOTH parties are ready to move on but what happens when one spouse comes home and says “Hey, best buddy, I’ve decided I don’t love you anymore so could you go ahead and get your shit out of my house so I can move my new best buddy in? kthanxbye.”

I love my husband and he is my best friend but I’d put him in a fucking hole if he did that to me. Betrayal is bad enough when it comes from a regular friend but from your best friend in the whole world, the one you had kids with and promised to spend the rest of your life with? I’m not seeing the happy, sappy Disney ending going down. Call me a cynic but um… bullshit.

Oh, and alimony is the most insulting and ridiculous fucking concept. There’s no goddamn good reason why some grown ass bitch can’t take care of herself. No adult deserves a piece of another adult’s income for years because they used to fuck once upon a time. Anybody who accepts alimony is a piece of shit. Hookers have more pride and self respect than some skank claiming that she can’t work because she has a fucking vagina.

[/quote]

One of the best posts I’ve ever read on here. Your husband is damn near the luckiest man on the planet.

297

Tiger had 13 whores, strippers, and such, right? Who knows if he brought home AIDs, clap, warts? She is right to berate the worthless prick.

Kids see mom pissed off at scmmy slut-dad? Good! Maybe they’ll learn that being a scummy male slut results in bad things.

She should also take him to the cleaners. Maybe people will learn not to cheat, esp just because you can chase a little white ball around and hit it into a hole.

Hope his Buddism helps him…LOL!

298

She should also take him to the cleaners. Maybe people will learn not to cheat, esp just because you can chase a little white ball around and hit it into a hole.

Hope his Buddism helps him…LOL![/quote]

Yeahhh, but that Little White ball had it coming.

299

I don’t have time to do this justice so I’ll just be quick & dirty.

AC, your post a few pages back should be an argument for staying together, not that divorce is ok because the kids will get over it. You had strange men throwing you down the stairs for crying out load. That wouldn’t have been happening if your father was there. Sure, a lot of kids recover, maybe most, and they can live happy lives and become good citizens. SOME DON’T. And all of the children of divorces become different people than they would have if their parents had stayed together. One thing that is statistically known is the children of divorce are more likely to get divorced themselves and doing the same thing to their children.

If you have children you should stay together as long as there is no physical or verbal abuse and do your best to make the relationship as good as possible until the kids are out. In my opinion, cheating alone is not an acceptable reason for divorce if you have children.

X, You should apply the approach you use for bodybuilding to relationships. Specifically the part where you say ‘listen to the guys who are bigger than you’. Listen to people who have successful long term relationships especially ones that thrive even with children. Btw, it’s been mentioned in this thread that marriages take a lot of work. Huh? How hard is it to be generous, courteous, kind and respectful to someone you love? Raising kids, now that’s hard work.

Oh and X, that was mighty pussy of you to take pot shots at people way back from the first page like you thought you could influence the collective memory of the board to forget that you were exposed as being completely insensitive and that material possessions are the priority for you.

Emily, nice posts.

Marvelgirl, I agree with most of what you wrote. I do disagree about alimony though. If a woman has given up her career and earning power in a relationship and dedicated her time to caring for the children she absolutely should get alimony.

And of course if you have assets, man or woman, you should have a solid prenup going into a marriage. Maybe even create a trust as well. This shouldn’t even be discussed here. It should be universally understood.

300

[quote]on edge wrote:

If you have children you should stay together as long as there is no physical or verbal abuse and do your best to make the relationship as good as possible until the kids are out. In my opinion, cheating alone is not an acceptable reason for divorce if you have children.
[/quote]

Agree with much of what you wrote, but this makes no sense. From the child’s perspective: are they really better off in an unhappy, but intact, family rather than a split, but perhaps happier one? Is it really better for the kids to see mom and dad arguing every night? Is it really better for them to have to eat dinner in icy silence?

And from the parents standpoint: you’re out of your cotton-pickin mind if you think it’s somehow better to stay with a cheating spouse rather than split. How happy is that family going to be, exactly? What kind of lesson are you teaching the kids? How do you face the other person across the dinner table? Is the faithful spouse supposed to be consigned to an adulthood with no intimacy whatsoever, just for the sake of keeping a family together?

And I don’t understand why verbal abuse is somehow worse than cheating. Cheating is a violent betrayal of nearly everything that marriage stands for. Verbal abuse can be awful in it’s own right, however I’d take being called an asshole of getting cheated on any day of the week. I would also take (and did) getting shit thrown at me over cheating.