[quote]Kuz wrote:
Bauer97 wrote:
He replied with “I’m using the equipment. I’m trying to lengthen my leg muscles, not make them wide.”
I would think getter taller is the only thing that would do the trick for longer leg muscles. Maybe he’s onto a secret! This is awesome news! My dream of a NBA career lives![/quote]
I want longer muscles but I don’t want to get taller.
I want my muscles so long they drag on the floor behind me.
I always overhear people in my gym talking shit because I make a beeline for the power rack and carry on with my squats and hang cleans and whatever “dangerous” exercise I do. Well one tall fat fuck was pissing me off with the following:
Fatty: What is the deal with squatting that low?
Friend: dunno
Fatty: do people do steroids here?
Friend: dunno
Fatty: He must be crazy or something
Friend: Yeah, check out his face, he turns red!
they watched me some more, then:
Friend: I wonder how many more sets he’s going to do.
I was doing another day of Smolov this particular day
Fatty: I guess when you shoot up 'roids and protein, you can squat all day.
No shit!
I walked into the gym to get some leg work in and there was a guy doing quarter squats with 155 takeing 7-10 minutes in between setts
naturaly when he walks away for 10 minutes I think hes gone aparently not I put on 225 right as he was walking back to wich he responded I can work with you guys I can do what you do ect
I start off with paralel squats and my brother with atg the guy waks over to one of his trainer buddys to talk about how bad our form was so he thinks he would give me some advice…
If you want leggs like mine you need to ride a bike that why my legs are so big compared to my body
the guy had chicken leggs and was telling me how to get mine bigger with quarter squats? and bikeing?
I cant stand it when two guys sit right behind you and talk about how your going to hurt your self they even bother you in the middle of a set to tell you
Yesterday doing breathing squats so yeah my form wasnt the best around rep 10 on good think I had the dime squat crew come over and show me how to do a real squat dont want to bend your back you might take the stress off your legs mean while they are useing 365 for some kind of leg lockout
N3wb*
Ha! This crap is priceless… I’d share some stories but I wear earbuds and can’t be bothered to listen to the gym clowns.
I didn’t know how lucky I was. I train in the morning, and I’m lucky if someone says Hi to me.
WHAT A DUMBASS ! SOME PEOPLE NEED TO LEARN THE HARD WAY !
CAN YOU SAY GRAPEJUICE !
new guy shows up and starts talking about what he does. it’s never just some fat-ass that wants to get in shape or some skinny guy who wants get stronger.
nah.
these guys are all ‘semi-pro football players’. ‘college basketball player’. or the ever-popular these last few years, ‘mixed martial artist!’.
[quote]apayne wrote:
Direct result of squatting in the smith machine.
[/quote]
Not really. Just a result of no inherent athleticism at all. She has never done smith machine squats, just what she has done with me.
To the other question, I can do anything and everything I want as long as I hurt nobody. It was probably a little mean to make her continue after falling several times, but I wanted to drive home the message that things can be done when someone tries, and that failure on something like this is not acceptable.
She is definitely going to hate me this morning however.
actual gym conversation, circa 2003:
i’m on the platform doing cleans and jerks. just did a rep around max, something like 165 kg. or so. not sure.
guy walks up. he’s around 5’5" tall and goes around 200 pounds.
him: how much is that?
me: 363 pounds.
him: what’s that?
me: what’s what?
him: what do you CALL that?
me: oh. clean and jerk.
him: what’s that do?
me: it’s a competitive lift. i compete in weightlifting.
him: yeah. i’m a powerlifter.
me: yeah? that’s cool.
him: yeah. i hold a few records.
me: oh. you do? what federation? i do some raw powerlifting.
him: no federation. world records.
me: oh? what records do you hold?
him: deadlift.
me: what weightclass?
him: middleweight.
me: middleweight? what’s that? what do you weigh?
him: 200.
me: okaaaaaaaaay. so…anyway. what’s your best deadlift then.
him: 'bout a thousand.
[quote]Hack Wilson wrote:
actual gym conversation, circa 2003:
i’m on the platform doing cleans and jerks. just did a rep around max, something like 165 kg. or so. not sure.
guy walks up. he’s around 5’5" tall and goes around 200 pounds.
him: how much is that?
me: 363 pounds.
him: what’s that?
me: what’s what?
him: what do you CALL that?
me: oh. clean and jerk.
him: what’s that do?
me: it’s a competitive lift. i compete in weightlifting.
him: yeah. i’m a powerlifter.
me: yeah? that’s cool.
him: yeah. i hold a few records.
me: oh. you do? what federation? i do some raw powerlifting.
him: no federation. world records.
me: oh? what records do you hold?
him: deadlift.
me: what weightclass?
him: middleweight.
me: middleweight? what’s that? what do you weigh?
him: 200.
me: okaaaaaaaaay. so…anyway. what’s your best deadlift then.
him: 'bout a thousand.
[/quote]
Priceless.
[quote]Bauer97 wrote:
devilBASTARDdog wrote:
Ok, so if I read a novel and stroke once every 15 seconds will I lengthen my favorite muscle?
Well, it didn’t seem to be working very well for this guy, but you can feel free to give it a shot.
Just don’t try it in my gym…[/quote]
What if I do it on the Hip Abductor/Adductor?
well, it turns out a good friend of mine has moved to the same city as me. he used to be a trainer at the same gym as i in our home town. now that he’s out here he wants to train with me. the only problem is that he appears to be in the same catagory as 90% of the trainers out there, and thats useless when it comes to training advice. it’s been about a week now and i have had to listen to every bit of wrong input he has given me and correct him on it. not that i’m some kind of guru, this is basic shit. how to target certain muscles, how not to put too much stress on weaker body parts(ex: rotator cuff, tendons, etc.) proper range of motion… the basics. it’s really putting a wedge between me and my training. i have never really had anybody to train with besides my ipod. the problem is that he doesnt have any friends here, we train at the same gym, and i saved his life(he says i saved it but he would have lived), plus he’s a cool cat. i dont want to be a dick to my friend, and i dont want to compromise my training. i was thinking of telling him that my schedule has changed and i have to trian at the exact time he cannot be there. what would you do?
Someone told me it was hard to get a good bicep workout without a spotter.
Seriously.
[quote]Hack Wilson wrote:
actual gym conversation, circa 2003:
i’m on the platform doing cleans and jerks. just did a rep around max, something like 165 kg. or so. not sure.
guy walks up. he’s around 5’5" tall and goes around 200 pounds.
him: how much is that?
me: 363 pounds.
him: what’s that?
me: what’s what?
him: what do you CALL that?
me: oh. clean and jerk.
him: what’s that do?
me: it’s a competitive lift. i compete in weightlifting.
him: yeah. i’m a powerlifter.
me: yeah? that’s cool.
him: yeah. i hold a few records.
me: oh. you do? what federation? i do some raw powerlifting.
him: no federation. world records.
me: oh? what records do you hold?
him: deadlift.
me: what weightclass?
him: middleweight.
me: middleweight? what’s that? what do you weigh?
him: 200.
me: okaaaaaaaaay. so…anyway. what’s your best deadlift then.
him: 'bout a thousand.
[/quote]
Feckin’ brilliant!
Alright, here’s a conversation I had last night in my gym. The gym is in the basement of the local YMCA. The closest bathroom is quite a ways away. So, next to the power rack is an emergency exit door. Here’s the exchange we had.
Me: Hey, does an alarm go off if that emergency exit door is opened?
guy: Why, is it open?
me: No, it’s not. I was just wondering if an alarm goes off if it’s opened.
guy: Why?
me: Well, I’m feeling a little queasy from my leg workout. And if I need to you know, puke, it’s a long run to the nearest bathroom. So, I was wondering if the situation arises, would an alarm go off if I go through that door to puke in a bucket or something.
guy: Why, don’t you just stop your workout?
me: Because i’m having a good leg workout, I don’t want to stop.
guy: Well, don’t overexert yourself.
me: What’s the point of working out if you don’t overexert yourself?
guy: Just don’t puke alright.
I just walked away shaking my head. I mean, don’t overexert yourself? WTF?
[quote]mazilla wrote:
well, it turns out a good friend of mine has moved to the same city as me. he used to be a trainer at the same gym as i in our home town. now that he’s out here he wants to train with me. the only problem is that he appears to be in the same catagory as 90% of the trainers out there, and thats useless when it comes to training advice. it’s been about a week now and i have had to listen to every bit of wrong input he has given me and correct him on it. not that i’m some kind of guru, this is basic shit. how to target certain muscles, how not to put too much stress on weaker body parts(ex: rotator cuff, tendons, etc.) proper range of motion… the basics. it’s really putting a wedge between me and my training. i have never really had anybody to train with besides my ipod. the problem is that he doesnt have any friends here, we train at the same gym, and i saved his life(he says i saved it but he would have lived), plus he’s a cool cat. i dont want to be a dick to my friend, and i dont want to compromise my training. i was thinking of telling him that my schedule has changed and i have to trian at the exact time he cannot be there. what would you do?[/quote]
Just tell him the truth man. That you would rather workout by yourself. Tell what I tell everyone. That my workouts are my time to myself. That gym time is about you and you alone. It’s not social hour, it’s not about making friends, it’s not about bullshitting. It’s about you and the weights! It’s about releasing all the tension and stress from the day. It’s your own personal sanctuary away from the rest of the world.
the other day i overhear the guy next to me…
douchebag doing pulldowns:
“I feel like I’m at the size where I don’t need to lift heavy anymore, I mean, i don’t want to get big and musclebound (looks directly at me while saying it)…cause chicks don’t like that anyway…they want an athletic looking guy! Why get so big? It looks stupid and girls will never like you”
Meanwhile: he is probably in his late 20’s-early 30’s, 5’10" and maybe 160. cut like a bag of milk. looks like andy dick. is struggling with an embarassingly low amount of weight. is wearing gloves and straps. has ILS/samsonite syndrome.
i laughed so hard i could barely finish my last set.
i hate people…the end.
[quote]vroom wrote:
Ha! This crap is priceless… I’d share some stories but I wear earbuds and can’t be bothered to listen to the gym clowns.[/quote]
I will sometimes eyeball a couple of goons and if they are close by me, I will leave on my earbuds and pause my iPod. I think I get some of my best material that way.
[quote]mazilla wrote:
well, it turns out a good friend of mine has moved to the same city as me. he used to be a trainer at the same gym as i in our home town. now that he’s out here he wants to train with me. the only problem is that he appears to be in the same catagory as 90% of the trainers out there, and thats useless when it comes to training advice. it’s been about a week now and i have had to listen to every bit of wrong input he has given me and correct him on it. not that i’m some kind of guru, this is basic shit. how to target certain muscles, how not to put too much stress on weaker body parts(ex: rotator cuff, tendons, etc.) proper range of motion… the basics. it’s really putting a wedge between me and my training. i have never really had anybody to train with besides my ipod. the problem is that he doesnt have any friends here, we train at the same gym, and i saved his life(he says i saved it but he would have lived), plus he’s a cool cat. i dont want to be a dick to my friend, and i dont want to compromise my training. i was thinking of telling him that my schedule has changed and i have to trian at the exact time he cannot be there. what would you do?[/quote]
I would hate to be in a situation where I go and have an entirely new gym schedule just to avoid one person (especially a friend). I think you just need to say that you have a different style or you want to try a new program. If he wants to do something entirely different (i.e. he wants to do a traditional 4 or 5 day per week bodypart split and you want to do Westside), then that would make sense and should not caused any hurt feelings between the two of you.
Overheard while I’m doing chins with a 45lb plate aroud my waist. Obviously they didn’t think I could hear em.
Skinny Guy points at me: That looks hard
Fat Friend: He’s on steroids
(yes, all 185lbs of me is so juiced! LOL)