I remember years ago there was this guy at the gym I used to frequent that everyone used to call “stretch” because he was really tall and thin - I’d estimate him to be about 6’ 3" or 6’4", and maybe 170-180lbs tops.
He used to do a full-body workout of something like leg press, pulldowns, bench presses and a bunch of arm and ab work about 4 or 5 times a week, and he always used about 40 or 50 pounds more than he could lift in good form, especially on the bench.
He was complaining that he hadn’t gained any weight lately. I remember after spotting him on a 10-rep set on the bench where I was helping him out after the second rep that he might want to lower the weight a bit and try to improve his form, and him saying, “Tried that. Didn’t work.” (And clearly his current routine was!)
I also suggested he might be overtraining doing a full body workout 4 or 5 times a week and he looked at me like I was an idiot and said, “You can’t overtrain”. The best one was after doing a terrible set on the bench where he was bouncing the bar off his chest like it was a trampoline, and complaining that his shoulder had been bothering him lately.
When I asked him why this could be, he went quiet, thought about it for a bit and then said, “I think it must be my diet”. True story, I shit you not.
[quote]Man O’ War wrote:
BarneyFife wrote:
The dumbass did NOT use collars, and several of the 45’s fell off. There was a catch peice on the smith machine that kept him from getting snapped in half. I wish people would act smarter, and learn how to lift properly!
That reminds me of an accident at my gym a few years back. The hero of the story was a World Strongman competitor. He’s featured on many TV shows.
He picked up a Olympic Bar with 2 45lb plates per side. He wanted to carry it over to the other side of the gym. He does and about turn and one of the plates somehow slides off with the momentum.
Some poor female staff member was picking up a weight off the floor and the 45 came straight down onto her hand. Needless to say it was broken.
The strongman just goes “You probably should get that looked at.” and picks up his weights and walks over to the other side of the gym.[/quote]
I hope you drug him out into the parking lot and helped him make some room in his mouth for new dental work.
Can you beleive the ingroance and the stupidity of some people? I dont care if you freaking ronnie coleman, you should be concerned about the safety of others.
Better yet, knock him in the head with a barbell, and then tell him to get it looked at.
A guy I know is the head of Sport Sciences at a University.
We were training in the Uni gym one day and he was doing a few sets of BB Jump squats.
Some punk instructor comes up to him and explains “There are better better exercises to build your quads.”
The guy I know dumbs himself down a fair bit to make out he knows jack shit about training. He listens to the guys self proclaimed wisdom/ garbage for 10 minutes and casually asks him where he studied.
The punk replies “I’m doing my Exercise Science degree here.”
The Professor then replies “Well, I’m the head of this school and I’m going to be doing a thorough review of our resistance training classes after your performance today.”
The look on the intructor’s face was priceless. The guy was obviously a struggler for the fact that he didn’t even who the head of the school was.
[quote]BarneyFife wrote:
I hope you drug him out into the parking lot and helped him make some room in his mouth for new dental work.
Can you beleive the ingroance and the stupidity of some people? I dont care if you freaking ronnie coleman, you should be concerned about the safety of others.
Better yet, knock him in the head with a barbell, and then tell him to get it looked at.
[/quote]
The guy was kinda big (read Goliath big) so he thought he owned the place.
He used to be sponsored by the gym. After that accident he had to pay his membership. We wouldn’t even give him a days grace on payment.
It was probably close to the biggest display of arrogance I have ever seen in a gym.
[quote]Cthulhu wrote:
OMFG.
I am about ready to do something to the people at my gym!
I was working out tonight and along came invasion of the thin kids who use steroids.
One walks up to me and asks me how I got so big.
I tell him hard work in the gym and lots of food.
Then he says,“Na man! Get some good juice and you won’t have to worry about eating too much and unwanted fat gain”-coming from a kid who is 6 ft and is around 135 pounds.
I almost hit him right in his jaw.[/quote]
I would have wired you some bond money if you had.
[quote]TrainerinDC wrote:
New girl client tongiht. Very cute, very intelligent. Just, not athletic at all. Showed her how to squat, using just an olympic bar. I tell her drive through the heel on the upward motion. She goes down, a2g, but unintentionally. She fell at parallel and I didn’t know this until she hit the floor.
Showed her again, picked her and the bar up for attempt two, where this time she falls again. This continued for about ten minutes. I wouldn’t let her stop until she did 3x10 squats with the bar. She was trying to push forward with her feet instead of into the ground, and falling every time. Here’s the kicker, she can leg press 300 lbs.
Not overheard, but a scene to watch. [/quote]
You’re actually allowed to do this as a trainer at your gym?
Kuz was asking for stuff that was overheard, so here are my two stories, that are brought to you today by the word “effort”:
#1
At my previous uni gym, there are 2 older, chubby women next to the ab crunch machine (the type you can add weights to). It’s obviously their first day and they have little clue what they’re doing.
One of them lies down on the machine and tries to do a crunch with it (no weight added) and can’t. Meanwhile, her friend is walking around the machine looking all over and under it as if searching for the magic lever that will help her friend get going. All of a sudden the lady gets a rep done, and exclaims Oh! It actually takes some effort!.
#2
Two young girls at my new uni gym, taking turns at the adductor/abductor machine. While one of them is knocking out 1000 reps on it she says to her friend I like using this machine…because it’s so easy and requires no effort.
[quote]Miserere wrote:
Two young girls at my new uni gym, taking turns at the adductor/abductor machine. While one of them is knocking out 1000 reps on it she says to her friend I like using this machine…because it’s so easy and requires no effort.[/quote]
Something similar;
There’s only one squat rack in my gym (which I was using) and two guys (skinny etc. obviously) came in and looked around a bit and then settled down at the smith machine & started to load it up for squats.
Being the nice guy I am I told them that I’d be done in two minutes if they wanted to wait for the rack, to which one of them replied “nah it’s cool, I prefer this machine anyway, it’s much easier.”
Oh, and they quarter squatted & ran up on their toes at the bottom of their quarter ROM.
The novel reading work out seems to be becoming a growing fad. There are at least three guys I’ve seen who do this and none of them look like they’ve ever seen a weight. How much concentration can you really have by doing seated rows while reading a book? [/quote]
How on earth can you read a book while doing seated rows???
[quote]devilBASTARDdog wrote:
Bauer97 wrote:
Professor X wrote:
He replied with “I’m using the equipment. I’m trying to lengthen my leg muscles, not make them wide.”
I asked him if he’d like some advice, to which he replied “none needed” and then swaggered on over to the inner/outer thigh machine, where his novel reading continued.
Ok, so if I read a novel and stroke once every 15 seconds will I lengthen my favorite muscle?
[/quote]
A little one handed reading always lengthens that muscle.
[quote]Man O’ War wrote:
A guy I know is the head of Sport Sciences at a University.
We were training in the Uni gym one day and he was doing a few sets of BB Jump squats.
Some punk instructor comes up to him and explains “There are better better exercises to build your quads.”
The guy I know dumbs himself down a fair bit to make out he knows jack shit about training. He listens to the guys self proclaimed wisdom/ garbage for 10 minutes and casually asks him where he studied.
The punk replies “I’m doing my Exercise Science degree here.”
The Professor then replies “Well, I’m the head of this school and I’m going to be doing a thorough review of our resistance training classes after your performance today.”
The look on the intructor’s face was priceless. The guy was obviously a struggler for the fact that he didn’t even who the head of the school was.
[quote]Bauer97 wrote:
He replied with “I’m using the equipment. I’m trying to lengthen my leg muscles, not make them wide.”
[/quote]
I would think getter taller is the only thing that would do the trick for longer leg muscles. Maybe he’s onto a secret! This is awesome news! My dream of a NBA career lives!
The novel reading work out seems to be becoming a growing fad. There are at least three guys I’ve seen who do this and none of them look like they’ve ever seen a weight. How much concentration can you really have by doing seated rows while reading a book?
How on earth can you read a book while doing seated rows???
[/quote]
You put your book in your lap while you use the lightest weight possible…light enough for you to stop in the middle of your set of a million reps to hold the bar with one hand as one arm keeps rowing and the other arm turns the pages.
Of course, these are the first guys to accuse anyone bigger than them of drug use.
Another thing overheard in the gym. This one is actually by an employee of mine.
She has been losing quite a bit of weight over the last year or so and had an appointment yesterday to have her BF% checked by the trainer in her gym. Now, she had this checked by them a few months back and has lost more weight since then.
I get on her case a lot because she is eating FAR too few calories these days. For instance, she is following some diet tracking site where her maintenance calories are set at 1700 so she tries to go 500 below that on a day with no exercise. On days she does exercise, she is alloted more calories. Again, I hassle her about eating too little, but I digress.
So, she gets her BF% checked and the wonder trainer tells her “Ohh, your BF% is too high. Its 31%” Now, this upsets my employee because she knows she has lost more weight and that number is higher than the last time they checked (of course, they are trying to sell her on a program). My employee explains to them her diet and the woman responds:
“Oh, that’s too many calories.”
WTF? Apparently her version is for her to vary her calories each day regardless of the amount of exercise. So in other words, 1200 calories on a day she does a long bike ride with her boyfriend or lifts. Just astonishing.
Kuz was asking for stuff that was overheard, so here are my two stories, that are brought to you today by the word “effort”:
#1
At my previous uni gym, there are 2 older, chubby women next to the ab crunch machine (the type you can add weights to). It’s obviously their first day and they have little clue what they’re doing.
One of them lies down on the machine and tries to do a crunch with it (no weight added) and can’t. Meanwhile, her friend is walking around the machine looking all over and under it as if searching for the magic lever that will help her friend get going. All of a sudden the lady gets a rep done, and exclaims Oh! It actually takes some effort!.
#2
Two young girls at my new uni gym, taking turns at the adductor/abductor machine. While one of them is knocking out 1000 reps on it she says to her friend I like using this machine…because it’s so easy and requires no effort.[/quote]
Effort? It actually takes effort? I don’t know what kind of kooky program you’re on, but I built my tremendous body using a low-effort, non-resistance, zero-impact program. It’s nice because I don’t have to worry about any kind of injuries like all of you juiceheads.
[quote]izzieable wrote:
I had a older fellow tell me that I should swim laps to smooth out my legs and git rid of those lumps and bumps.
Heard one guy ask another if he used protein power or are you natural.[/quote]
A friend of mine had a guy he knew from high school walk up to him in the gym all secretive-like and tell him in a whisper, “Hey, I’m on Hot Stuff.” He was dead serious.
[quote]TrainerinDC wrote:
New girl client tongiht. Very cute, very intelligent. Just, not athletic at all. Showed her how to squat, using just an olympic bar. I tell her drive through the heel on the upward motion. She goes down, a2g, but unintentionally. She fell at parallel and I didn’t know this until she hit the floor.
Showed her again, picked her and the bar up for attempt two, where this time she falls again. This continued for about ten minutes. I wouldn’t let her stop until she did 3x10 squats with the bar. She was trying to push forward with her feet instead of into the ground, and falling every time. Here’s the kicker, she can leg press 300 lbs.
“Creatine gave me acne and I started having sexual side effects so I stopped using it. It’s way too powerful for anyone who is not an advanced trainee”
This was from a 5’ 10" 300 pound kid, all fat, who got winded walking from his bench were he perched his gear to the dumbell rack to bust out another set of curls. At least he understood that he wasn’t advanced…
