Squat Rack Curls Quatro

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181

[quote]jtrinsey wrote:
My favorite lifting story ever:

A few years ago, a buddy of mine and I were both back from college for the long Thanksgiving weekend. We wanted to get a workout in, but didn’t want to pay the “walk-in” fee at any of the gyms around here. Luckily, I happened to have a bar with some plates in the basement, so we brought that outside and did some cleans, front squats, presses, etc. I live in a townhouse, so we are basically doing this in the parking lot.

Getting some weird looks yes, but we at least have some decent size on us, so the people that walked by could tell what we were doing. Everybody except for one old lady. I see her approaching from a distance with that creepy smile old people get when they are going to say something profoundly dumb. She’s old, so it takes her a good 25 seconds to get within talking distance. As she approaches, she looks at us (and mind you, my buddy is mid-overhead press), and says, “Well… what are you building?”

My mind spins for a second, wondering if I had mistaken my barbell for a jigsaw and the plates for 2 x 4s. Nope, just a barbell and plates. I stammer for a second, my mind spinning into the void. My buddy however, didn’t miss a beat. In his best Arnold impersonation, he simply goes, “Mah-suhhhhhls” and keeps going with his set. She stared at us for a few more seconds, then weeble-wobbled away.

I still giggle to myself thinking about that.[/quote]

Nobody commented, but shit made me laugh.

182

[quote]marathe wrote:

[quote]jtrinsey wrote:
My favorite lifting story ever:

A few years ago, a buddy of mine and I were both back from college for the long Thanksgiving weekend. We wanted to get a workout in, but didn’t want to pay the “walk-in” fee at any of the gyms around here. Luckily, I happened to have a bar with some plates in the basement, so we brought that outside and did some cleans, front squats, presses, etc. I live in a townhouse, so we are basically doing this in the parking lot.

Getting some weird looks yes, but we at least have some decent size on us, so the people that walked by could tell what we were doing. Everybody except for one old lady. I see her approaching from a distance with that creepy smile old people get when they are going to say something profoundly dumb. She’s old, so it takes her a good 25 seconds to get within talking distance. As she approaches, she looks at us (and mind you, my buddy is mid-overhead press), and says, “Well… what are you building?”

My mind spins for a second, wondering if I had mistaken my barbell for a jigsaw and the plates for 2 x 4s. Nope, just a barbell and plates. I stammer for a second, my mind spinning into the void. My buddy however, didn’t miss a beat. In his best Arnold impersonation, he simply goes, “Mah-suhhhhhls” and keeps going with his set. She stared at us for a few more seconds, then weeble-wobbled away.

I still giggle to myself thinking about that.[/quote]

Nobody commented, but shit made me laugh. [/quote]

x2

183

Yesterday I saw a very skinny Asian man with tight sweatpants use his entire body in an attempt to move the weight stack on a cable station. He was trying to do pushdowns, and looked at the stack dumbfounded when it didn’t move at all; repeat three times. Then he turned around with the rope over his head and trying pulling it away from the machine with a bow shaped body, lol.

184

I saw a guy using straps on the Hammer pulldown with a 25 on either side.

185

Talking straps…how many times have you seen a guy use them for curls? I’ve seen that probably two dozen times.

186

When i was at a gym near my gf’s house, there was a scheme where in off-peak times they brought in blind people and got them to use the machines. Fair enough. But for one trainer that wasn’t enough. he got this girl, with no prior training experience (and let me repeat, BLIND) doing lateral raises standing on a bosu ball WHICH WAS UPSIDE DOWN. I didn’t know whether to say anything or not so I just did my stuff, left and looked for an interesting article in the next day’s paper (sadly, none)

187

Two guys who are always at my gym grabbed the squat rack after I finished. They put the bar way down low and loaded up their weight. Then they put some 15 lb dumbbells on the floor and put them under their heels. So the first guy gets in there and has to crawl to get under the bar and get it on his back. He stands up and places his heels in the dumbbells and proceeds to do about 8 quarter squats. He then nearly falls on his face trying to put the bar back in the super low hooks. Then he turns around and tells the other guy, “That’s how you do it. It’s great for your knees.”

I’m not certified or anything, but this seems like a bad idea, especially for the knees.

188

[quote]Nards wrote:
Talking straps…how many times have you seen a guy use them for curls? I’ve seen that probably two dozen times.[/quote]

Actually saw Bob Cicherillo recommend this in his “War for the Worlds” videos when I used to hang out on bodybuilding.com. Not saying it’s right, just pointing out that there’s a precedence.

(I said I used to go to bodybuilding.com. I don’t anymore, so stop frowning at me)

189

-Steal and hide dumbbells
-load an extra plate/unload a plate when someone is about to bench/squat and they aren’t paying attention
-drop heavy weights
-curse
-say the word “faggot” out loud and its derivatives (fag, faggy, fag-shit)
-tell dudes to their face they are emo
-“Get the fuck out of my gym”
-Politely ask “are you using this?” about dumbbells or bar/plates, and if they are, say “not anymore” and take it
-take cable handle attachments during someones rest period and put it back in the box or behind the bar (especially D-handles for cable crossovers)
-throw half-full container of whatever beverage in the trash if its on a bench

Can’t think of anymore at the moment

190

[quote]solidkhalid wrote:
-load an extra plate/unload a plate when someone is about to bench/squat and they aren’t paying attention[/quote]

This one is the worst. It can be straight up dangerous. I can handle rudeness, stupidity, and overall douchebaggerry, but when it comes to safety I get pissed off fast.

191

Ok, so, I’m sitting in the library at school and this girl just picked her nose …

I lul’d. It’s not gym related but she caught me laughing at her and felt embarassed and got up and left. This made me lul somemore. She looked back and saw me luling still and I’ve never seen a human being turn that shade of red without being sunburned.

This made me lul even more, now that 163 lb kid that I’ll use as a zombie shield keeps looking at me which is making me lul more!

So, here’s my dick move. Sunday I was in on the incline bench doing db inclines and this guy, who was a few feet away, was curling w/ body english. So, he asks me after his second set if there’s anything he could do to improve his curls. I said, “Try putting your back into it. It looks like you’re only half swinging, you should be almost falling backwards when you curl.”

Hleft almost immediately after our interaction.

I didn’t feel bad mainly because he was kind of distracting. I hope he doesn’t think we’re friends now. There’s nothing I hate more than guys who think you’re best friends with them just because you gave them advice. Even if that advice was bad advice, which is the only advice I give to jabronies in the gym. I used to give solid, good advice until they kept talking to me while I was lifting.

It’s like, dude, can’t you see I"m in the fuckin’ zone? I think next time someone decides to bother me 3 consecutive days in a row I’m going to bother them. Because sometimes you can’t just tell people things and they’ll understand, you have to show them. Like, hey dude, stop bothering me over every little thing, I’m here to lift, ya know? But then they go ahead and continue to bother you. So I think I’m going to ask them for tax advice. Or like where they get their car repaired. And if they say that they repair their own automobile I’m going to trap them into repairing mine for me for free! That’ll teach them. Sometimes obligation is fun.

Unless it’s a hot girl, then she can ask me for advice all she wants, because do you know how much obligation will accumulate? Then one day BAM…

That bitch’ll be making me sammiches

192

[quote]Fletch1986 wrote:

[quote]solidkhalid wrote:
-load an extra plate/unload a plate when someone is about to bench/squat and they aren’t paying attention[/quote]

This one is the worst. It can be straight up dangerous. I can handle rudeness, stupidity, and overall douchebaggerry, but when it comes to safety I get pissed off fast.[/quote]

Also do it for those about to do any kind of overhead pressing with a barbell.

No one has gotten hurt yet (mostly due to bro-spotting) and the only time something remotely bad happened was when a dude lifted off with a squat and got stapled at the bottom.

Just for clarification when I said load/unload I meant only one side.

193

[quote]marathe wrote:

[quote]jtrinsey wrote:
My favorite lifting story ever:

A few years ago, a buddy of mine and I were both back from college for the long Thanksgiving weekend. We wanted to get a workout in, but didn’t want to pay the “walk-in” fee at any of the gyms around here. Luckily, I happened to have a bar with some plates in the basement, so we brought that outside and did some cleans, front squats, presses, etc. I live in a townhouse, so we are basically doing this in the parking lot.

Getting some weird looks yes, but we at least have some decent size on us, so the people that walked by could tell what we were doing. Everybody except for one old lady. I see her approaching from a distance with that creepy smile old people get when they are going to say something profoundly dumb. She’s old, so it takes her a good 25 seconds to get within talking distance. As she approaches, she looks at us (and mind you, my buddy is mid-overhead press), and says, “Well… what are you building?”

My mind spins for a second, wondering if I had mistaken my barbell for a jigsaw and the plates for 2 x 4s. Nope, just a barbell and plates. I stammer for a second, my mind spinning into the void. My buddy however, didn’t miss a beat. In his best Arnold impersonation, he simply goes, “Mah-suhhhhhls” and keeps going with his set. She stared at us for a few more seconds, then weeble-wobbled away.

I still giggle to myself thinking about that.[/quote]

Nobody commented, but shit made me laugh. [/quote]
x3

194

This doesnt really fit the theme but its short.

Bros curling and talking about their part time jobs. One works the bar at kind of a ritzy restaurant. The other comments that the money must be good. The other counters, no, its not, nobody goes to the bar at the restaurant.

“Oh well do you split tips with the servers?”

“No, they’re pretty jewish about that shit.”

Casual anti-semitism standing next to a Jew. Nice.
Don’t do that. Unlike black people, we can go undercover and you never know when we’re around.

195

[quote]Eli B wrote:

[quote]marathe wrote:

[quote]jtrinsey wrote:
My favorite lifting story ever:

A few years ago, a buddy of mine and I were both back from college for the long Thanksgiving weekend. We wanted to get a workout in, but didn’t want to pay the “walk-in” fee at any of the gyms around here. Luckily, I happened to have a bar with some plates in the basement, so we brought that outside and did some cleans, front squats, presses, etc. I live in a townhouse, so we are basically doing this in the parking lot.

Getting some weird looks yes, but we at least have some decent size on us, so the people that walked by could tell what we were doing. Everybody except for one old lady. I see her approaching from a distance with that creepy smile old people get when they are going to say something profoundly dumb. She’s old, so it takes her a good 25 seconds to get within talking distance. As she approaches, she looks at us (and mind you, my buddy is mid-overhead press), and says, “Well… what are you building?”

My mind spins for a second, wondering if I had mistaken my barbell for a jigsaw and the plates for 2 x 4s. Nope, just a barbell and plates. I stammer for a second, my mind spinning into the void. My buddy however, didn’t miss a beat. In his best Arnold impersonation, he simply goes, “Mah-suhhhhhls” and keeps going with his set. She stared at us for a few more seconds, then weeble-wobbled away.

I still giggle to myself thinking about that.[/quote]

Nobody commented, but shit made me laugh. [/quote]
x3[/quote]

x4
I catch myself saying this when I’m walking long straight lines around campus, I crack myself up.
I need friends.

196

[quote]Eli B wrote:
Unlike black people, we can go undercover and you never know when we’re around.[/quote]

I just imagined Terry Crews trying to sneak into a gym with a ninja-spandex-suit.

197

Just a couple days ago I was taking a 45 off a bar that was place ridiculously high (I’m apparently the only one at my gym that has the decency to put weights back) and It caught, so i tugged really hard and hit myself right in the eye. Hurt like a monkey. Thankfully no one was there.

I go to the the gym at off hours and find myself alone for long periods of time. So, for fun, after my workout, I move all the 45s to the squat rack, and move all the weights on the smith machine to other places. One of the trainers gave me kudos the next day- apparently they have cameras everywhere.

My favorite though? The old guy who looks bat shiz insane, doing a circuit on the machines… of one rep per machine. And one circuit.

198

I was in the gym today finishing off a back workout with bent over rows. I did my first set wandered off up the little set of steps to the water fountain to get a quick drink before going back into a set, while i am off getting said drink some little kid no more than 16/17 pulls a bench out from the smith press to no more than 4 inches away from the end of the bar that i will be lifting .

Fair enough i wasnt there at the time and he might have just been moving the bench out of the way to get on the smith press , but no as i start doing my 2nd set he proceeds to sit down and start doing an incline chest press or shoulder press with his lap no more than 4/5 inches slightly off centre from my face , so as i finnish my set i bang the weight down (not too hard but enough) to register my displeasure at his blatent disregard for my personal space .

When i have completed my sets and start unloading the bar he has to move his legs to as the plates that i am taking off are hitting his legs .

Needless to say it made me a little bit angry which would have been great at the start if my workout as i could have used the anger in a positive way ,

199

So today is leg day and I’m doing squats in the squat rack. Guy walks up and asks to work in. I said fine and he precedes to do half squats with the same weight I’m using.

The squat rack next to us opens up and says, “I’m gonna go over there cause I’m lifting heavy today.”

He then loads two more plates than the previous weight and does 1/4 squats. I should get a T-Nation medal of honor for showing tremendous restraint for not making any comments.

200

[quote]Eli B wrote:

[quote]marathe wrote:

[quote]jtrinsey wrote:
My favorite lifting story ever:

A few years ago, a buddy of mine and I were both back from college for the long Thanksgiving weekend. We wanted to get a workout in, but didn’t want to pay the “walk-in” fee at any of the gyms around here. Luckily, I happened to have a bar with some plates in the basement, so we brought that outside and did some cleans, front squats, presses, etc. I live in a townhouse, so we are basically doing this in the parking lot.

Getting some weird looks yes, but we at least have some decent size on us, so the people that walked by could tell what we were doing. Everybody except for one old lady. I see her approaching from a distance with that creepy smile old people get when they are going to say something profoundly dumb. She’s old, so it takes her a good 25 seconds to get within talking distance. As she approaches, she looks at us (and mind you, my buddy is mid-overhead press), and says, “Well… what are you building?”

My mind spins for a second, wondering if I had mistaken my barbell for a jigsaw and the plates for 2 x 4s. Nope, just a barbell and plates. I stammer for a second, my mind spinning into the void. My buddy however, didn’t miss a beat. In his best Arnold impersonation, he simply goes, “Mah-suhhhhhls” and keeps going with his set. She stared at us for a few more seconds, then weeble-wobbled away.

I still giggle to myself thinking about that.[/quote]

Nobody commented, but shit made me laugh. [/quote]
x3[/quote]

I want you to know that I used your friend’s line today and it was a big hit.

Mid story about how the doctor gave me a steroid shot for strep throat I remembered this little tale and threw in a double bi and a claim that the shot gave me “Mah-suhhhhhhls” Many LULZ ensued.