Pranks and Scares

Off Topic
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For a while now I have been thinking about trying to scare two of my good friends. I believe both of them are probably gullible enough to believe it and will be good sports about it when relise they were punked. I’m still debating whether or not it’s worth the time because if I do decide to go through with it, I will have to go in hardcore, maybe a week of setup, and enlisting the help of other people.

So tell me if you have ever played a really funny joke on someone. Scared someone on Halloween. I love pranks, not of the “jackass” variety that involve eating animal feces and blunt force trauma to the genitals. I like setup pranks. I remember when I was younger, a show used to come on Sci-Fi called “Scare Tactics” I loved it! I always thought it would be cool to do a prank like that. Possibly even film it for later viewing pleasure.

Post your funny pranks, or any time you have scared the hound out of someone.

Here’s mine, it’s still in it’s developing phases…

The joke will include my friends S, M, and P, my brother B. I will invite S, M and P over to the house for some good ole’ beer drinkin’. I live 50 mi. from town, pretty rural, so the drive is about an hour if you go the speed limit, so we have plenty of time to get the “story” going. S will be in on the joke, because he won’t fall for any of it, he lives rural also, and will ruin it because he won’t freak out like P and M will. Also, I can use him as a reference, to back up my scary story.

The Story: Lately a lot of local farmers/ranchers have been losing a lot of livestock to predation. (Cheesy, I know, but it will work). I may even throw in some bogus story about a person or two being killed, maybe as an unrelated story. At some point going home, close to the house, I will have B, run across the road in a costume, but do it far enough in front of the headlights that M and P won’t be able to tell what it is, and S and I will disregaurd it as wildlife, ensuring them it was probably just a coyote or bobcat, ect.

“I don’t know, it didn’t really move like a coyote but I’m sure that’s what it was, I didn’t get a good look at it, it may have been a dog, but I don’t know…Oh well.”

We get to the house, I reinterate stories of animal predation, talk about how the livestock don’t look like they were attacked by any kind of native predators. Yadda Yadda, build a little suspense. See if anyone wants to go spotlighting for coyotes.

(a hobby where I come from, park the pickup, turn on a tape of a coyote call “rabbit in distress or wounded deer fawn” and use a spotlight to see if coyotes approach the area, some people shoot them, some people don’t. For obvious safety reasons, we WON’T carry guns)

We will call up some coyotes, the prank will be even better if we actually call up real coyotes to see, which is likely, and then, at a predetermined time, B will appear in costume in a predetermined position on the ground, I will reveal him with the light. And everyone will get a good look at him in costume, looking eerily NOT like any native wildlife. He will be far enough away so that nobody can properly discern exactly what he is, until he moves, AND STANDS UP LIKE A FUCKING HUMAN, BUT HE WILL BE DRESSED UP IN THIS FREAKY ASS COSTUME MOVING AROUND STEALTHILY SCARY AS SHIT, YES!..CLASSSSIC!!

Then we will be too freaked out to spotlight anymore. Me and S will just keep rationalizing it out like it is normal. (Lol like what kind of animal is going to stand up on two legs and move around, like James Bond)

We will go to the house, beer-drinking as promised, and then, the creature will reappear, stalk around the house.

I’m still trying to think of a way to trap M and P outside the house with the monster all alone so B can chase them around in the costume and scare them.

I also want to do a close-up of the monster, like at some point we all get in the house and it walks really close to a window with everyone pressed up against the window in anticipation.

I am undecided on the costume, maybe were-wolf type? Too cheesy, I was thinking about integraded deer antlers somehow, I don’t know why, he would end up looking like something straight out of a navajo campfire story, spirit of the wolf-deer-man god. LOL I think it has potential. Sorry for the long post.

Give me YOUR stories!

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I can see this going horribly wrong. B will run across your headlights but mistime the distance and you’ll mow him over. Realising what you done the three of you decide to ditch him in a lake but then realise at the last possible moment, as he’s sinking, that he’s still alive…so not only have you run over your friend - you’ve drowned him too.

The three of you spend the rest of the year as shells of your former selves, grades slipping, avoiding people and each other until next summer, on the anniversary of B’s death one by one you receive text messages iniviting you out to the lake. THE lake, where it all happened…

OR

There really is a predator in this area and before you come upon B on the road the predator kills B, takes his costume and spends the next 67 minutes chasing you all through the woods.

So…just saying…be careful, be safe. Pranks like this always go wrong in the movies and the more complicated the plan - the more margin there is for error.

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One time me and a couple of buddies decided to watch the Star Wars trilogy one night during Christmas break in high school.

Since we grew up in Winnipeg the sun goes down at about 4:30PM in the winter and we started Star Wars at about 6PM.
One guy fell asleep 5 minutes in so me and the other guy changed the clock on the VCR to 2AM and put in Return of the Jedi and fast forwarded to the end when the Ewoks are dancing and woke up buddy and told him it was 2AM…he looks at the clock, sees that Jedi is over,freaks out and runs home thinking his mom and dad will kill him but it was about 6:30.

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We once filled a guy’s dorm room with newspaper by slipping in sheets under the door. Then we filled the elevators with it.

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Old roommate put fake eviction notice on door for other roommate to find.
Was hilarious.

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[quote]Nards wrote:
One time me and a couple of buddies decided to watch the Star Wars trilogy one night during Christmas break in high school.

Since we grew up in Winnipeg the sun goes down at about 4:30PM in the winter and we started Star Wars at about 6PM.
One guy fell asleep 5 minutes in so me and the other guy changed the clock on the VCR to 2AM and put in Return of the Jedi and fast forwarded to the end when the Ewoks are dancing and woke up buddy and told him it was 2AM…he looks at the clock, sees that Jedi is over,freaks out and runs home thinking his mom and dad will kill him but it was about 6:30.[/quote]

Hahahaha. Evil! I love that one!

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I lived in a dorm my first year of college. You had to live on the floor to get on to it (unless someone opened the door obviously) so a lot of people left their doors unlocked. Stupid, but probably not risky so whatever. One time my friend on the floor was at practice or something, and a bunch of people went in to his unlocked room and moved EVERYTHING out to the common area, including his desk and his bed, and recreated his room out there.

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One night I snuck into some sort of mission in Norco, CA and found this barn that had a second floor apartment. I figured out a way to unlock and lock it from the outside. I unlocked then slammed the door open and closed a few times relocked it then ran. You should have seen the look on those two guys’ faces.

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[quote]postholedigger wrote:
One night I snuck into some sort of mission in Norco, CA and found this barn that had a second floor apartment. I figured out a way to unlock and lock it from the outside. I unlocked then slammed the door open and closed a few times relocked it then ran. You should have seen the look on those two guys’ faces.[/quote]

You clever little asshole!

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Those are all funny as hell. I love that kind of stuff. We will go through a lot of practice on the headlights thing. As well as other aspects of the joke. We’re just not going to set it up and run through it a couple times and call it good. I’m talking, were going to run through it until it’s perfect. It’s gonna take days. We will go through every nessessary precaution to make sure nothing goes wrong. And like I said…I havn’t thought it all the way out yet. But if we do it, I want it to be the biggest scare ever. LOLLOLLO makes me laugh just thinging…lol

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Best “prank” story I’ve heard of was (I think) an excerpt from some poster’s school paper. Apparently the writer had a terrible roommate, so he started engaging in psychological warfare with the guy. It was the most epic story I’ve ever read, and if I remember correctly in the end the roommate thought he was going insane (didn’t suspect foul play) and moved out.
Of course, I can never find that thread when I look for it. If anybody knows what I’m talking about I would love to find that story again.

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I used to scare my roommate all the time. I would go in the backyard and lay out a nice long trail of gasoline leading out into the front yard where I’d be standing with a blowtorch. The trail wound into the backyard and ended right at the back door, not a foot from the threshold.

Then I’d call him outside with some bullshit excuse and as he came down the stairs I’d run out into the front and light the gasoline. That shit would light up and race through the yard so that when he opened the door here’s this big flame running across the ground at him.

Other times I’d do the same thing with a leaf pile. I’d lay a trail from the leaf pile to a random spot in the yard. But I’d have put a bunch of gas under the pile first and then more on top. What happens is the fumes settle a little bit and then I’d light the trail while he’s standing near the pile. He’d be used to the little “trail of fire” trick so he wouldn’t react to it, even when it hit the leaf pile and caught it on fire. But if you do it right, the fumes from under the pile light on fire a few seconds later and it’s literally a fucking explosion! Not a big flame rollout type of explosion, just a big concussion from the rapid expansion of air. But it would still scare the SHIT out of him because the concussion was like getting punched in the stomach. We didn’t live together long.

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My sophomore year in college my buddy and I met these two hot little freshmen the weekend before school started. Earlier that week we had tossed out an old couch but it was still in the alleyway near our house. So I decided we should play a little trick on the two chicks and welcome them to college life. We snuck over to their apartment (they lived in a school-affiliated apartment that was basically off-campus glorified dorms) with the couch and tied it to their front door at 3 in the morning. They had class the next day at 8am sharp.

Well, we decided after a little while that we wanted to see their reaction, so we went back and started banging on the door to wake them up. Apparently they freaked the fuck out and thought they were being attacked or robbed or whatever. They REALLY freaked out (we were now hiding in the bushes watching all of this) when they realized they couldn’t even open their door because this monster-sized couch is hog-tied to it. We thought it was hilarious, but we didn’t realize they had called the cops in a panic. We went back to our place for a couple more beers (we lived in the complex next door) when all of a sudden about 5 cops show up. The chicks recognized the couch (they met us when they saw us dragging it behind my truck through their parking lot like a fucking tube behind a boat) and they knew where we lived so they ratted us out. When the cops found out we were on the baseball team they just made us go over and get rid of the couch instead of arresting us for who knows what.

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I held a bit of a grudge against the two chicks who ratted us out, and so did my buddy.

One night we’re walking home from a party and I’ve got an empty backpack on my back. We always flipped coins to see who had to lug around a backpack with about 40 beers in it from party to party. So we’re on our way home and we come across this dead squirrel that was in pristine condition in the middle of the sidewalk. It must have fallen out of a tree earlier that night because it wasn’t a roadkill squirrel, you know what I mean? Fucking solid condition.

So I tell my buddy “Hey! Grab that fucking squirrel and put it in my backpack! I’ve got a great idea.” So he picks the fucking thing up by its tail and puts it in the empty backpack. We had left the party early because we both had to be up real early the next day for practice, so there’s still a lot of people walking around heading down to the frat house area. It was also common knowledge that if you saw someone walking around with a backpack in the middle of the night on a Friday there was probably a bunch of beer in it. So this douchebag and his girlfriend walk up to us and this fucking guy has the nerve to ask me if he can have a couple beers out of the backpack. The following was NOT my great idea; it came to me in a flash.

We were out of beer, but I didn’t mention this and said “Sure, just grab a few out of my backpack! Help yourself!”, and I turn around so he can open it up. My buddy is barely able to control himself at this point.

The guy reaches in and I can feel him grab the fucking squirrel with a FIRM grip and then he squeals out loud and screams “What the fuck was that?!?!? It’s all hairy! Oh fuck!” I couldn’t contain myself any longer and yell at him “It’s a dead fucking squirrel you asshole! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” He stares at me in disbelief and then blurts out, “I’m gonna fucking puke!” and he starts kinda dry heaving and the real funny part is his girlfriend is laughing the whole time and he went to cover his mouth with the hand that he had grabbed the squirrel with, then realized what hand he used and just took off running.

But the point of grabbing the squirrel in the first place was because we had seen these two chicks who ratted us out to the cops at this party, and on the way back I was still fuming about the whole couch episode. Well, I also knew that one of them was a hardcore animal rights activist. So on the way back to our place we made a little detour and stopped by their place. I pulled the squirrel out of my backpack by the tail and chucked it against their door as hard as I could. The fucking thing splattered into a huge bloody, furry mess! Then we waited in the bushes again for them to come home and see what carnage was waiting for them on their door. THAT reaction was hysterical! L.O.L.

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The roommate that I used to scare with fire was the subject of a couple other good pranks. My OTHER roommate and I fucking hated his guts, but we were all locked into a 6 month lease together so there was nothing we could do…except engage in a highly sophisticated, covert PSYOPS campaign.

My favorite one was when we steam-opened some mail he got from some sort of govt-related disability agency. Turns out the guy had a raging case of dyslexia and was receiving monthly handouts from the govt as a result. So what do we do? We seal the envelope back up like nothing ever happened. He didn’t know that we knew what he was all about at that point. He NEVER told us that he had dyslexia or any sort of learning problem whatsoever. And he definitely never mentioned anything about receiving retard welfare.

So every night for about a month and a half whenever he was home, my OTHER roommate and I would launch into these long, heated diatribes about the backwards nature of bloodsucking moochers sucking off the govt’s teat and how the worst of all of these parasites are the ones who get payments for disabilities, specifically learning disabilities. But we never directly addressed any of this AT the target roommate; we just screamed and yelled about these injustices AROUND him. Without failure, every time we started in on this shit, he would get red in the face and slink away to his room in shame.

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The same roommate mentioned earlier was the target of many dirty little tricks as part of our sustained PSYOPS campaign. Some of them involved microscopic amounts of fecal matter in his food, microwaved milk, disappearing fish from his exotic fish tank and other rather mundane endeavors.

BUT, I was worried that if he found out about this stuff, the totality of what we had done would set him off and perhaps even provoke some sort of counter-operation of his own. I wanted to ensure that he didn’t move out and get the last laugh by telling us that he had done all sorts of weird shit to US. So I created a little insurance policy and jacked off into his shampoo about 22.5 times (I missed the whole bottle once). That way, if he ever moved out and revealed his trickery to us, I could calmly and collectedly tell exactly how his soft, manageable hair had become so silky and smooth over the last couple months. He never did try to one-up us, so I never had to cash that policy in, but it always pays to have a little insurance just in case.

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[quote]Sharp4850 wrote:
Best “prank” story I’ve heard of was (I think) an excerpt from some poster’s school paper. Apparently the writer had a terrible roommate, so he started engaging in psychological warfare with the guy. It was the most epic story I’ve ever read, and if I remember correctly in the end the roommate thought he was going insane (didn’t suspect foul play) and moved out.
Of course, I can never find that thread when I look for it. If anybody knows what I’m talking about I would love to find that story again.[/quote]

HAHAHA! That was me who posted that shit! I just posted some examples from it and then I saw this! I’ll have to track down the disk I have that saved on. It wasn’t for the school paper, by the way. It was for the magazine I write for and I actually got paid to write that shit. I had to use a pseudonym for it. I interviewed porn star extraordinaire Kayden Kross the week that that issue came out and she had read it before I showed up for the interview. She thought it was pretty nutty and that I was probably a bit deranged. I didn’t get to fuck her, despite trying to lure her downtown for a Rohypnolcolada.

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All these other pranks are for fucking kids. Aren’t there any real SADISTS out there?