Which is why I said itās contrived tripe.
The best breakup song of all time is One, by U2 -@dt79 's favorite group of all time.
You say love is a temple, love a higher law
Love is a temple, love the higher law
You ask me to enter but then you make me crawl
And I canāt be holdinā on to what you got
When all you got is hurt
Donāt get me started! My mom left when I was 12; Iām a breakup song connoisseur.
But again - holidays. Weāre making gnocchi now, for Tuesday.
1 Like
When someone who is not Italian says āgnocchiā, I giggle on the insideā¦
Itās only Saturday! Food Network cooking competition shows told me you can easily make gnocchi in an hour, but half an hour is not enough time.
Hot Take:
Most men (90%+) in dead bedrooms (sex 1x a month or less) have only themselves to blame.
2 Likes
Agree completely.
Itās because of feminism!!!
I know my reasons as to why I believe this, but why do you believe this?
Many reasons. Women tend to initiate less boldly and become self-conscious more easily. Men may not even notice the move. Female sex drive quiets down when nothing is happening, whereas male drive does not. Female sex drive increases with regular action, assuming the action is satisfactory.
Women are more particular about hygiene; both men and women can slack off for whatever reason, but a male is less likely to shut down sex because of it. Iāve read womenās arousal described as narcissistic; they become aroused by arousing others. I think thereās truth to this. So merely grabbing a boob at bedtime is probably not enough.
A big cause of celibacy in relationships is male reactivity to performance issues. They experience ED, freak out, and then have worsening issues due to anxiety around it. While she becomes more and more self-conscious and her sex drive wanes.
All of these are generalizations, of course, so only true for the people for whom they are.
Healthy male drive assuming all else is in order is the primary engine. Women enjoying a happy sex life will IMO be more likely to reciprocate taking initiative. And then we have a nice feedback loop of desire and mutuality andā¦you know, sex
2 Likes
We have a lot of similar beliefs here, albeit yours are far more kindly worded.
I would say that most men do not realize that the way they look plays a big role in their sex life. Being attractive as a whole is obviously going to make your wife more attracted to you. Moreover, being attractive to other women creates a preselection bias that reaffirms oneās wifeās attraction to her husband. Partially related to attraction to status/intrasexual competition.
This is an interesting way to frame it. I think I would expand on it to: women become aroused by arousing others (who they find sexually attractive).
I could talk about this for hours but Iāll leave it alone as itās such a major derail to this thread that itās worthy of itās own thread.
I agree. This is worthy of its own thread.
It would be interesting to explore this subject.
Said the young man.
I donāt disagree, but me being me is defensive - isnāt it both partiesā responsibility to make sure the action is satisfactory?
I appreciate your acknowledgement of generalizations.
You might actually try having sex rather than talking about it on a forum.
1 Like
*who turned his dead bedroom into a 5x+ weekly kind of bedroom.
Hard to do that at work but Iāll let the bosses know you said it was okay and they should blame you.
1 Like
I think I assume that this is obvious, as itās difficult for me to imagine an uninvested female deriving pleasure to the point that her sex drive shifts into a higher gear. I guessā¦maybeā¦if heās simply pleasuring her. But then the whole thing sort of collapses anyway, because how many men remain invested in a sex life consisting only of oral sex for her, or whatever it is he does to satisfy her without any effort on her part.
It paints a funny picture - like, a Victorian woman draped on a fainting couch, completely uninvolved in whatās going on in her underwear - so thank you for the early morning giggle.
@Andrewgen_Receptors Iāll take my response to you to the other thread.
1 Like
Reminds me of a joke my mother told me. She has a degree in Philosophy, which might explain why I am fucked up.
You are the young bull. I am the old bull.
Most people know the joke.
4 Likes
No, it is not. Some gals check out after having their second kid, living down the block from their parents, in a Cape similar to what they grew up in. They gain sixty pounds, stop cleaning themselves, and take everything for granted.
Some gals. I hear. I wouldnāt know.
1 Like
Anytime I can make you giggle is a good time.
Right, but these women arenāt enjoying a positive sex-drive-revving feedback loop. The more we do it the better it feels the better it feels the more I think about it the more I think about it the more I want to do itā¦
No, you are correct. They are just drinking gallons of wine, getting fat, satisfied to have two kids and living in the neighborhood in which they were raised.
So I hear - purely hypothetical.
Hypothetically, their husband is jacked, working out, attractive.
2 Likes
Iām nit-picking, but is this really a problem?