'Please Don't Get Too Big'

Off Topic
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[quote]jaybvee wrote:
My parents have always thought I was pretty big - even before I started lifting - my nickname as a kid was “the little fridge” (Go ahead, laugh)

At 34 I’m still stocky but way more muscular than I was in HS - now when I go home to visit the parents, yep, I get the "You should stop working out, you’re getting too big, lose some weight, blah, blah, blah) I know as my parents they love me to death & say it out of love :slight_smile:

I get mixed reactions from various people (co-workewrs, friends I haven’t seen in a while, etc.) but I know I should cut down to around 190-200 from my current 235 lbs @ 5’8 so I can see my damn abs & give my knees a break…[/quote]

who is girl in your picture? she look very nice

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[quote]LiveFromThe781 wrote:
jaybvee wrote:
My parents have always thought I was pretty big - even before I started lifting - my nickname as a kid was “the little fridge” (Go ahead, laugh)

At 34 I’m still stocky but way more muscular than I was in HS - now when I go home to visit the parents, yep, I get the "You should stop working out, you’re getting too big, lose some weight, blah, blah, blah) I know as my parents they love me to death & say it out of love :slight_smile:

I get mixed reactions from various people (co-workewrs, friends I haven’t seen in a while, etc.) but I know I should cut down to around 190-200 from my current 235 lbs @ 5’8 so I can see my damn abs & give my knees a break…

who is girl in your picture? she look very nice[/quote]

^ very.

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It is really sad. I agreed to start training a friend, who said he wanted to get big, but not to big. He gave an example of wanting to look like a wrestler, Mr. Kennedy i think, but if you are going to lift why would not want to look huge like…

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John Cena, another wrestler?

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I’d settle for twice as big as john cena…
but more yoked-much more.

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[quote]That One Guy wrote:
When I told my sister that I wanted to get to around 200ish and then i’d reasses my goals, she replied

“So you’re gonna get fat? Like all the coaches (football coaches i’m assuming she’s referring to) are all fat.”

“Ummmm…no 200 isn’t even that heavy, and no i’ll lean out.”

“…so you’re gonna be fat” with some kinda ignorant giggle

It just seems like when people say the amount of 200 pounds they imagine someone who is overweight, which is sad and says a lot about the state of our people’s dietary habits when that is the first picture that comes to mind. [/quote]

I agree, being treated like a fat person is the last thing I expected since I started living this lifestyle, and it was very bizarre the first time I heard someone say that to me.

I’ve also quit telling my family what my goals are. Every time I have reached my target weight, I immediately added another 10 pounds to my previous goal and started working towards that. This mindset is something that separates those of us who are truly dedicated from everyone else, and trying to explain/justify this concept to the average person is extremely difficult. Some people just don’t get it…

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My wife is constantly overfeeding me, filling up plates with food it takes me an hour to finish. When I try to lower my portions she goes “you worked out today, shouldn’t you eat more carbs?” It would make sense if I weren’t already 260 lbs. She likes me big, when I cut she always says I’m skinny :slight_smile:

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[quote]Professor X wrote:

I am really surprised by how much some of you married people let slide.
[/quote]

That being said; there has to be SOME give and take in a relationship (not going to get into that any more) but yeah; I agree. There has to ALSO be a certain “way I am and always will be” with each person and they (the other party) have to learn to at LEAST accept that (if not grow to love that).

Since before I knew my girl; she was checking me out at the gym and saw how dedicated I was/am. And that will never change.

We don’t eat at the same time always; and when we do you can be almost certain I’m eating differently.

She knows that if it’s a gym day, I’ll be home late. And if I have to stay late at work, I’ll be home even later.

Thankfully she is in the medical field and is very intelligent about nutrition/supplementation so she doesn’t give me shit about anything I take and/or took. Hell, she even woke up at 5am to spray me down these last 2 weeks!

But I guess what I’m saying is that it’s nice to have someone that is 100% on your side with your goals when there is so much opposition in the world.

And by opposition I not only mean friends and family who think you’re too big; but this whole “Emo/Straighleg/Skinnyfuck” fad that’s catching the teen-world by storm.

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[quote]Professor X wrote:
bsims80 wrote:
Professor X wrote:
bsims80 wrote:
My wife is the same, she always tells me to not get any bigger. Or accuses me of taking steroids and threatens to leave me if I am!! I usually just laugh at her and go make a shake!

She also gets mad when I’m cooking ground beef, steaks, chickin for my lunches bc I am not making her and my sons lunches too…I’m so selfish! I guess I’m missing something about her being home all day with the kiddo while I’m stuck in the office and don’t have time to leave for lunch. I just tell her to help herself to my plain ground beef and sweet potatoes…she says yuck. Lol, guess you just can’t win those battles.

…and you are ok with this?

Wow.

I found humor in the fact that she complains that I’m not cooking for her yet she has no interest in eating what I’m cooking. Women are nuts.

…Not just that, but yes, that would be a huge red flag to me also.

I eat in order to make progress. If some woman I am with has a problem with me eating MY OWN FOOD when I need to regardless of who is in the house, then I see bigger problems coming later on.

I am really surprised by how much some of you married people let slide.

It isn’t like it disappears. It will get added into a box of everything else she finds a problem with until it is too big to ignore.

I would think someone looking at the future would put an end to that before it actually got bad.

…either that or you aren’t that serious about lifting weights.[/quote]

I cook my own food and my wife supports me going to the gym. Hell, she was lifting the day before our kid was born–and lifted more than the guy beside her. But, once you get married and especially after having a kid, you need to be more serious about being a good husband and father than you are about lifting weights. It is a priority choice.

Not for everyone, sure. And I would not disagree with the idea that the greatest gains a lifter can make are during the times he and she can focus on his/her self over anyone else. I think this is why college is such a productive time for many guys/gals on this site. It is not just about the hormones but that college is a time where you are expected to be self directed.

If lifting is your top priority, as I know it is for you X, that’s fine. Its just not always everyone else’s.

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[quote]catone wrote:
My wife is constantly overfeeding me, filling up plates with food it takes me an hour to finish. When I try to lower my portions she goes “you worked out today, shouldn’t you eat more carbs?” It would make sense if I weren’t already 260 lbs. She likes me big, when I cut she always says I’m skinny :)[/quote]

lucky bastard.
:wink:

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I was stationed in Guam when I went through my ‘transformation’(20 pound gain in four months). Sent a picture home that my GF(now wife) took at a waterfall, with my shirt off. One of my uncles joked about quitting the roids, but my mom got all serious, and gave me this lecture about how I was gonna be one of those old men with stretched out, hanging skin.

A chick I was stationed with at the time didn’t see me while I was gaining, then saw me in uniform with the sleeves rolled up(GUNZ!), and actually pulled me aside to ask if I was taking roids or something. Thought that one was funny, took it as a compliment actually. I said, ‘No, why, you got any?’

My wife has said before that she didn’t want me to get too big, but when I came home from deployment at about 215(biggest I have ever been) and 10%bf, and was wearing a wife beater…she hasn’t said that since. Her concern with me getting too big wasn’t looks, though(she digs the muscle), it was more about having that weight on top of her in bed.

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My mom accused me of taking steroids before. It actually pissed me off because I bust my ass in the gym and kitchen to look the way I do and I’m not even big!

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[quote]hardgnr wrote:
I’m about 235 now and still feel fairly small, although like you said, when your in public you realise your bigger then most people - minus the fat women. Some of those bitches have 25 inch arms.
[/quote]

Some women I see throughout the course of the day make me throw up in my mouth

[quote]hardgnr wrote:
Other then my family, nobody says ‘your getting to big’ or ‘how big do you want to get?’ Its usually compliments since I was such a skinny ass. I usually just change the topic when they bring it up since they don’t want to know the answer. “Mum, I want to be FUCKING HYOOOOOGEEEEE!”[/quote]

I agree with this. All of my friends always have good things to say and compliment my progress. Some of them have even started working out after they saw how much weight I have been putting on, which is pretty cool. It’s my family that are the only source of negativity.

When I went to Thanksgiving this year, I took so much shit for my physique. The minute I walked in the door, my cousins and uncles started cracking jokes. I was called ‘the hulk’ at least 20 times every day. They gave me plastic cups to drink out of because they didn’t want me to accidentally crush a glass in my hand while drinking. They asked me to wait last to serve myself mashed potatoes because they thought I was going to fill an entire plate full just for myself.

I don’t mind because that’s how my family has always been and always will be. I had a great time throwing insults back their way every time, and it was much easier for me to point out their wet noodle arms, chicken legs, beer guts, man boobs and the fact that some of them can’t see their own feet when they look down.

When it came time to deep fry the turkey, no one said a word when it was me that had to lower the bird into the hot oil…

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[quote]boatguy wrote:
I was stationed in Guam when I went through my ‘transformation’(20 pound gain in four months). Sent a picture home that my GF(now wife) took at a waterfall.[/quote]

Talafofo Falls? Been there, got a similar picture, lol.

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[quote]catone wrote:
My wife is constantly overfeeding me, filling up plates with food it takes me an hour to finish. When I try to lower my portions she goes “you worked out today, shouldn’t you eat more carbs?” It would make sense if I weren’t already 260 lbs. She likes me big, when I cut she always says I’m skinny :)[/quote]

Damn whered you find a dime like that ?

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[quote]G87 wrote:
I think it’s exactly as you said. People who don’t work out keep telling me I’m big… And I’m only about 185 lbs! I think the deal is, you seem small to yourself because your point of reference is people who weightlift. THEIR point of reference is the average person. Hence the confusion. [/quote]

Truth

[quote]WS4JB wrote:
How bout this.

Ive leaned up a little bit since I moved out from living with the parents, walking around a college campus and paying your own food bill will do that I guess.

Well my mom, sister, and dad all told me that i should add some more mass, because at 5"10 and 185 i look too small, they all think i should be up above 205 to look good on my frame.

So i asked them to write me a check for more groceries when I left to drive home, and they were all for it.

Guess Im just lucky.[/quote]

You hit the jackpot

[quote]Enjoy The Pain wrote:
Just tell 'em that you won’t get too big. They don’t need to know that, from our point of view, getting too big is impossible.[/quote]

Good point. That’s beyond the comprehension of non-gym folk and might make someone’s head explode out of confusion.

[quote]Doug Adams wrote:
After hearing mom tell you that, you should’ve ate everyone else’s food at lunch, take a long drink from your gallon of water, and smash the table in half. How dare someone question your alpha status.[/quote]

Hahaha. Smash the table before or after I started throwing empty tubs of Whey at their heads?

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[quote]B rocK wrote:
Join the club!

About 3yrs ago my mother accused me of taking steriods when I came home for a weekend and brought my supplements with me (whey, fish oil and Animal pak). I was 185lbs lol. But back then I was just growing out of my size medium shirts…so I “looked” bigger.
[/quote]

I figure its only a matter of time at this point before the 'Are you on steroids" question comes up.

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[quote]Pluto wrote:
John Cena, another wrestler?[/quote]

Cena would be much cooler without the jorts

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I think women are engineered to be able to take that sort of thing. They’re very durable.

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My problem is the opposite. I used to be larger than life. My ex told me to stop “getting skinny” and my mother would leave chicken drumsticks under my pillows to fatten me up.