I was/am in a similar situation, though it seems like you guys are better friends – all I can say is kudos to you for revealing in-person.
Obviously I don’t know the relationship dynamics, but it sounds like you are offering genuine friendship regardless of whether she returns romantic feelings for you. If she does not want to maintain the friendship, even if it is slightly awkward at first, then it’s her loss. There’s nothing left for you to do, and I don’t think you should feel bad.
I’m really sorry to hear what happened
^^^^^^^^
She’s lucky to have you as a friend. Hopefully she sees that and you guys can still be great friends after. Who knows, it might end up as an inside joke
very likely
There is nothing wrong with telling someone how you feel. It was brave and the right thing to do. She will understand and given a little time to process she will accept it and you can work on building a new friendship with you both coming from a place of honesty and understanding. You are not the first person to have feelings for a friend and definitely not the first to not have those feelings returned. Give her time and give yourself time to come to terms with it.
I am. Everything I offer is genuine. For better or worse (yep, very possible), I never lie. Not that I’m incapable, I just chose, a lot of years ago, not to. It’s basically what I’m most proud of about myself.
Speaking the truth obviously depends on your view point (I love star wars) and I might withhold things to shield people for example but ask me straight and you’ll always get the real deal.
Does my bum look big in this?
It looks fabulous!
So you’re very honest. That’s great, and, honestly, this might be the true test of this particular friendship. Again, nothing to feel bad about. Unless you did something creepy while confessing, haha, but I imagine that was not the case.
Does appearing naked on her couch count as creepy?
20.08.
1 axle clean and press
8 x 1 @ 116 kg
I fucked up my plate math and went from 96 kg to 116 kg, thinking I had loaded 106 for my last warm up.
2 car deadlift
3 x 5 @ 270 kg
1 @ 300 kg - PR, easy lift. This was just for confidence
3 bent over row, 4 sec ecc.
3 x 11 @ 70 kg
4 step ups
2 x 12 @ 30 kg dbs
Notes:
There are other moves?
Yes. You can appear naked on her bed.
I’ll consider that if I ever find myself in need of making a move again.
I gotta say over the last few days my perspective on the matter changed a good deal. @Voxel got me thinking and opened up a whole new perspective. This led to me being less understanding and actually less patient as a negative but also freed me up of some of the guilt I’ve been feeling. I just don’t see that I did anything inherently bad or hurtful. Maybe I’m missing something, I don’t know but as far as I can tell, this shouldn’t be such a negative thing from her point of view. I’d really wish to talk things over with her but she’s been avoiding me and I did the same (to give her space), which increases my feeling of unease.
If anyone (looking your way @bagsy ) has been in this situation but in her position, not mine, could maybe open my eyes for how she might feel or why this could be such a negative thing (given what I have disclosed about heh dynamic of our friendship), I would appreciate it.
On a completely unrelated note: I am anxious for our water bill. I have been taking so many hot baths (as did my room mate apparently) that things might have escalated. They help me relax and I pretend they do all sorts of other things as well (help recovery and help fight my still not outbroken cold).
Pre-kids, my go to cure for a cold was lots of hot baths and lots of tea (British). Usually cleared even the worst colds up in a day.
My 2c is that it’s still very early days to see how this shakes out. I understand you want closure and want closure now, because you’ve been preparing yourself knowingly or unknowingly for this for a long time, but this is new for her. She’s had no warning, and will likely need longer to process things.
Absolutely. I have acknowledged that already and included it in my thought process. This was not surprising for me but it was for her.
The thing about me is that I can’t deal with uncertainty and lack of control well. And when I say I can’t deal with it well, I mean “it’s a big thing in therapy -not well”. Uncertainty and lack of control about my own emotions mainly. That’s what creates the impression that nothing ever can shake me, that other people often tell me they have about me (you don’t get that here because I can willingly articulate otherwise on here in text form).
My therapist actually kind of hinted at me trying to take pot in order to let go of some of that need for control because I can’t willingly let that go and we have a hard time actually getting to my raw emotions. But that’s a whole other story, haha.
Yeah, I’ve very recently been on the receiving end. I don’t think the relationship dynamic is the exact same, so I don’t know how useful my input would be, but I’ll have time to write a more thoughtful response later today.
How long has it been? Not yet two weeks, right? I wouldn’t be too concerned yet. And seriously, if she turns around and says you guys can no longer be friends, then that’s that. You’ll have closure either way. Sucks because it sounds like you would “settle” for only a friendship either way, but I think your taking the chance rather than spending the rest of your life wondering is worth it. I would try to busy yourself with something else for the time being.
Mate…I am just going to quote this and everyone can just fill in the blanks themselves.
I knew I could count on you!
But you forget I am huge and poor. No room for anyone else in our little tub.
Yep - candle, bubbles… All of it!
I did not open this forum up expecting to see a picture of you, in a bath, with moodlighting. A warning would have been cool, is all I’m saying.
I’ve read Onlyfans is banning explicit content. I just wanted to take one of the last opportunities I have to promote my special sale. Cyrrex can mail you the details.
Isn’t this like Instagram banning pictures of asses? Or Facebook banning everyone’s mum?
