From my grandma- “Be good! And if you can’t be good, be fast. If you cant do either, name it after me.”
I used to be ‘with it’ then they changed what ‘it’ was now what I’m with isn’t ‘it’ and what’s ‘it’ seems weird and scary to me.
Call me anything you want, just don’t call me late for dinner.
GunSmoke
If a frog had wings it wouldnt bump its ass when it jumps.
[quote]Gambit_Lost wrote:
[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
Shit eating grin
Nothing beats that phrase…[/quote]
I can’t count the number of times I was told to “wipe that shit eating grin off your face”… lol
[/quote]
I just got told to wipe the shit off my face.
We are going to have a right “knees up mother brown” tonight.
He’s as bent as a two-bob watch.
My granpa’s favourite ---- “Lad, you don’t know wether to scratch your watch or wind your arsehole”
My dad always told me that “Anyone who beat it more than him had 3 hands”
Hunger is the best sauce (told by my grandmother chasing me out of the kitchen trying to eat before dinner).
Whoever marries for money, earns every penny (grandma talking about the hottie who married the old man next door — damn, she was hot)
A pig gets fat, but a hog gets slaughtered (which is a really weird saying for Israelis).
Whiskey is for drinking; water is for fighting over (when I was playing with the hose outside; maybe this is a desert thing).
This is really going to show my southern roots…
“You can’t make chicken salad out of chicken shit.”
“What’s time to a hog?” - My mom referring ot my granfather who would drive to Georgia just to get peaches.
“They could eat corn on the cob through a chain link fence” - refering to someone with jacked up teeth
“She looks like 10lbs of shit in a 5lb bag.”
“That dog won’t hunt.”
“You are getting to big for your britches son!” - Dad to smartass son…
“Nervous as a long-tailed cat in a romm full of rockers.”
“As easy as pulling a greasy string out of a cats ass.” no idea on where this came from other than my Papaw
“Well bless their heart!” - What mom and mammaw said when they didn’t have anything nice to say about someone.
“That boy could tear up concrete.”
When I was a teen, and cocky…my dad would say (jokingly) “I don’t see an anchor chained to your ass- come get some”. Then he would say (holding his arms up like a boxer) “I’m 0-57…I’m due!” I’ts funny, I never post, but this kinda hits home… haha…
[quote]Hip Scar wrote:
This is really going to show my southern roots…
“You can’t make chicken salad out of chicken shit.”
“What’s time to a hog?” - My mom referring ot my granfather who would drive to Georgia just to get peaches.
“They could eat corn on the cob through a chain link fence” - refering to someone with jacked up teeth
“She looks like 10lbs of shit in a 5lb bag.”
“That dog won’t hunt.”
“You are getting to big for your britches son!” - Dad to smartass son…
“Nervous as a long-tailed cat in a romm full of rockers.”
“As easy as pulling a greasy string out of a cats ass.” no idea on where this came from other than my Papaw
“Well bless their heart!” - What mom and mammaw said when they didn’t have anything nice to say about someone.
“That boy could tear up concrete.” [/quote]
What part of the south HS, cause I grew up hearing all those same sayings.
[quote]sleepyhollow wrote:
When I was a teen, and cocky…my dad would say (jokingly) “I don’t see an anchor chained to your ass- come get some”. Then he would say (holding his arms up like a boxer) “I’m 0-57…I’m due!” I’ts funny, I never post, but this kinda hits home… haha…[/quote]
One of my dads favorites was “don’t let fear and common sense hold you back”.
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
[quote]sleepyhollow wrote:
When I was a teen, and cocky…my dad would say (jokingly) “I don’t see an anchor chained to your ass- come get some”. Then he would say (holding his arms up like a boxer) “I’m 0-57…I’m due!” I’ts funny, I never post, but this kinda hits home… haha…[/quote]
One of my dads favorites was “don’t let fear and common sense hold you back”.
[/quote]
Dad and big brothers:
“Feel froggy, jump.”
One I used to hear from my grandparents that I just heard by a new secretary about a young IP guy who is jumpy as hell after coming back from Afganistan:
“He had a bad war” (explaining why he was jumpy as hell).
I’m a military guy, and I was particularly sad to hear a young person use this old person’s saying.
[quote]hel320 wrote:
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
[quote]sleepyhollow wrote:
When I was a teen, and cocky…my dad would say (jokingly) “I don’t see an anchor chained to your ass- come get some”. Then he would say (holding his arms up like a boxer) “I’m 0-57…I’m due!” I’ts funny, I never post, but this kinda hits home… haha…[/quote]
One of my dads favorites was “don’t let fear and common sense hold you back”.
[/quote]
Dad and big brothers:
“Feel froggy, jump.”[/quote]
He would also say “if you ever hit me and I find out about it”
I am so old I remember when vampires sucked blood and not cock.
For the NY heads:
Word, as in “Word up, yo!”
Dope, as in “That shit is dope, yo!”
Fly, as in “That shit is fly, yo!”
Mad, as in “That shit is mad fly, yo!”
Fresh, as in “Dude is lookin mad fresh…yo!”
“Oh SNAP!!”
Such colorful, schoolyard insults such as, “you motherfucking, titty-sucking, two-timing bitch!” That one really takes me back to elementary school…
“when you get to be my age there are two rules to live by…never waste an erection, and Never, never trust a fart.”