Butterscotch!
Depends.
“Some people don’t know the difference between shit and chewed up dates”.
“shit & git”
“He’s good people”
“Don’t you piss on my leg and tell me it’s rainin’!”
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left.
“Seventeen! Why don’t you try fucking a grown woman?!”
“You need help! Seriously!”
Driving like this.
Be sure to refer to black people as “colored”
Better yet “that nice colored girl” “That nice colored boy”
[quote]Dasher wrote:
Remember < $1.00 gasoline.[/quote]
Oh shit.
I also remember cigarettes for cheap, and the stop&rob clerk would sell them to me if I said they were for my mother.
“You’re only as old as the person you feel.” -Groucho Marx
[quote]SkyzykS wrote:
Butterscotch!
[/quote]
Yes! You need to start keeping those little old fashioned hard candies wrapped in celophane around. In fact, I recommend several candy dishes strategically placed around your abode. They should rest upon doilies.
Refer to television shows as “programs”
Your ultimate expression of shock and dismay should be “Why I never!”
“My penis doesn’t work anymore.”
Goodness!
Put your shoes/hat/sweater/socks on or you’ll catch your death of cold
[quote]Mad HORSE wrote:
“You’re only as old as the person you feel.” -Groucho Marx[/quote]
Wasn’t his quote something like “A man is as old as his wife makes him feel?”
Just thought I’d have a gander at all the shenanigans going on in this thread!
I’m 38 and I was telling my coworker who is 23 that we had a little hole in the corner of our desks in elementary school where the ink well would go.
I tried telling her that we were laughing at it in 1985 as they last time they’d likely had ink wells in there was 1940, but she still thought it meant I was ancient.
I had another coworker that thought since I said I was once in the army that I might have fought in Vietnam. Which ended when I was born.
The worst part is she thought the Vietnam war was in the 50s.
[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
The more books I buy you the dumber you get.[/quote]
I buy you books and all you do is eat the covers.
I’m in my late forties. My two favorite saying are, “dumbass”, and “pussy”. They are usually direct at males of the ages 13-28.
here’s a few for those “still wet behind the ears”
can’t dance and too wet to plow
everythings chicken but the beak
six of one 1/2 dozen of the other
he’s dumber than a box of rocks
she’s got an ass 2 ax handles wide
that things tighter than a tick
if you can’t run with the big dogs stay off the porch
if you sleep with dogs yer gonna get fleas
that boy couldn’t fight his way out of a wet paper bag
you’re so stupid you couldn’t find a elephant in a phone booth
yer breaths so bad you’ed knock a buzzard off a shit wagon
whatta ya mean who? yer feet don’t fit no treelimbs
whatta ya mean who? you don’t shit through feathers
colder than a well diggers asshole
colder than a witches tit in a brass bra
yer so old you fart dust
I ain’t had pussy in so long I forgot which arm it’s under
her pussy’s so big ya better strap a 2x4 across yer ass so ya don’t fall in
Boogie-oogie-oogie!!!