You know what I would bet the biggest problem in your life is?
THAT YOU HAVE THE FRICKIN’ MINDSET TO ASK SOMEONE ELSE TO MOTIVATE YOU AND IF THEY CAN’T TO TURN YOU ONTO A DRUG THAT WILL!!!
Does IT not register in your brain what a problem that is???
Look, I know how you feel. I am a FFB (Former Fat Boy), I lost alot of weight over a couple years, and over another couple years I gained about half of it back. I’ve smoked cigarettes since I was 15, been addicted to certain substances, been through months of drinking everyday and eating like shit and there was nothing but ME that was able to stop any of that.
It didn’t all happen at once like that, but over the last year I had quit smoking, wasn’t drinking much, no drugs and HAD gained 30 pounds. I broke up with my girlfriend, went to waking up with a drink, smoking alot of cigarettes, and actually losing weight during that because I wasn’t eating much and was living like shit. Started back to eating alot, then throwing it up.
All of that was stupid and extremely unhealthy. You think I didn’t know that? I sure as hell did, and inside I hated myself for it, but I sure as hell didn’t bitch about having a drinking problem, or being fat, and I SURE AS HELL never said, “I want to quit smoking”.
You know what happened?
It just hit me one day. I was sick enough of things being the way that they were that it was easier to change. I had a freshly lit cigarette in my hand, I threw it out. I had a pack and a half of cigarettes and I crushed them and threw them in the trash.
I didn;t say I was gonna quit drinking, I didn’t say I was going to finish this pack and then quit, and I didn’t say I was going to start a diet tomorrow. I did it right then.
YOU DO IT NOW!
If you’re asking this question on a forum you’re not ready to do it, and you’re not going to take anyone else’s advice. It’s all on you buddy, you have to want it like you want to fucking breathe.
I sincerely wish you good luck and hope that the smarter you comes out and takes over things. When you start back on the right path I’d be glad to give whatever advice I can, though there’s little I have to offer in the way of bodybuilding knowledge.