Can I get just a bit hippyish and say it makes me feel happy now emilyQ is together with somebody and happy and that togetherness is important, man?
[quote]Der_Steppenwolfe wrote:
Can I get just a bit hippyish and say it makes me feel happy now emilyQ is together with somebody and happy and that togetherness is important, man?[/quote]
Right on, man.
(pic is probably more for Chushin than anyone else though.) 
[quote]Chushin wrote:
[quote]SkyzykS wrote:
[quote]Der_Steppenwolfe wrote:
Can I get just a bit hippyish and say it makes me feel happy now emilyQ is together with somebody and happy and that togetherness is important, man?[/quote]
Right on, man.
(pic is probably more for Chushin than anyone else though.)
[/quote]
LOL!
Fuck you, too! :-)[/quote]
But I thought you liked those beautiful Squaws?
Oh and to follow up on a question- My wife’s heritage is part Cherokee.
[quote]pushharder wrote:
If you’re gonna put up the Sonny and Cher pic you gotta play the song?
Who here remembers their TV show?[/quote]
I remember parts of it. I was born in May of '72, but have an oddly sporadic but detailed memory of things from as early as 16 mos. old.
[quote]Right on, man.
(pic is probably more for Chushin than anyone else though.) [/quote]
Bridget Riley pectorals? Way fucking cool. I could understand it if somebody decided to get their body tattooed like that. I mean, I wouldn’t do it myself, but I’d understand it.
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
except he still pushes for the unbalanced financial thing (paying for everything).
[/quote]
Yes, because now its a war of frames.
This is a traditional guy and you like him.
Let him be traditional.
If you think its too one sided, up the ante and make it even by doing something traditional for him.
Like cooking.
Nekkid in high heels. [/quote]
I do cook! But he’s a better cook than me. :-/ He can even do that pan flip thing to stir stuff. I have to muck it around with a spoon. So much less cool.
Nekked. . .I’m without curtains in the kitchen, so that’s out. I suppose I could bring stuff over to his place. It’s pretty cold right now for that sort of thing, though, honestly.
One of the things I think about when dealing with money stuff is the resentment I’ve read on here about women using men, men getting the short end of the stick, women being conniving and money-oriented, etc. So it’s important to me not to give the impression that I am after financial benefit. I don’t want to be an asshole. Plus, delightfully enough, I get paid to go to work every day, which affords me the luxury of pulling my own weight (although we’d have to weigh less for it to be totally even; more pizza and less nice restaurants).
Still, he seems genuinely miffed when I get there first, or when I insist on buying groceries because I’m cooking at my house, but he’s thrown shampoo and razors in. So I dunno. I’m not sure which way to go.
I like doing traditional things, so that’s not a problem. I’m just not sure what they are in our context, or how to go about them.
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]silverblood wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
except he still pushes for the unbalanced financial thing (paying for everything).
[/quote]
Yes, because now its a war of frames.
This is a traditional guy and you like him.
Let him be traditional.
If you think its too one sided, up the ante and make it even by doing something traditional for him.
Like cooking.
Nekkid in high heels. [/quote]
but do you love him enough to fry bacon?[/quote]
No.
Even if I did I would not steal her man. [/quote]
This made me laugh. God, you’re funny when you’re not being awful.
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
One of the things I think about when dealing with money stuff is the resentment I’ve read on here about women using men, men getting the short end of the stick, women being conniving and money-oriented, etc. So it’s important to me not to give the impression that I am after financial benefit. I don’t want to be an asshole. Plus, delightfully enough, I get paid to go to work every day, which affords me the luxury of pulling my own weight (although we’d have to weigh less for it to be totally even; more pizza and less nice restaurants).
Still, he seems genuinely miffed when I get there first, or when I insist on buying groceries because I’m cooking at my house, but he’s thrown shampoo and razors in. So I dunno. I’m not sure which way to go.
I like doing traditional things, so that’s not a problem. I’m just not sure what they are in our context, or how to go about them.[/quote]
When we want to pay for the girl and she doesn’t let us, it’s actually pretty annoying. Just let him pay for what he wants. I know you are a gracious person and you won’t take him for granted. He will pick up on that very obviously and know you’re not just taking advantage of him; trust me.
Also it’s annoying when you try to carry something for a girl and they’re like “No I got it.” And I’m like “Dammit I have to prove my worth by lifting things; stop stifling me!”.
So there >:P
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
One of the things I think about when dealing with money stuff is the resentment I’ve read on here about women using men, men getting the short end of the stick, women being conniving and money-oriented, etc. So it’s important to me not to give the impression that I am after financial benefit. I don’t want to be an asshole. Plus, delightfully enough, I get paid to go to work every day, which affords me the luxury of pulling my own weight (although we’d have to weigh less for it to be totally even; more pizza and less nice restaurants).
[/quote]
But, for me at least, I have no problem with the traditional bargain.
I have a problem with women not holding up their end of it.
So if he wants to provide, let him, your deal is to support.
Emotionally, sexually and whatnot.
Thank you all for your good wishes.
He’s off playing pick-up hockey this morning and I am (ostensibly) running and cleaning. Then we’re going to do public skate, because this is the last day of ice. It’s a good thing - I have a cracked tailbone and yesterday I fell on my arm and it keeps dislocating or something. So several months to recover may not be a bad thing. But I am getting better at crossovers and turning around to skate backwards, so there’s that. However, if my physical condition deteriorates much further sex is going to be very challenging. I’m hoping to make it through today injury-free. I’ve got one good arm and one good leg left. I’d like to keep them.
In bigger feelings, he added me onto his phone plan yesterday. I needed to switch carriers because I’ve been tearing through my data allotment at work and am consistently charged overage fees. We both got new phones and my carrier switch and now we’re on a plan together. It feels like a big commitment, even though I can just split off if something goes wrong. Still. It’s a family plan.
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
Thank you all for your good wishes.
He’s off playing pick-up hockey this morning and I am (ostensibly) running and cleaning. Then we’re going to do public skate, because this is the last day of ice. It’s a good thing - I have a cracked tailbone and yesterday I fell on my arm and it keeps dislocating or something. So several months to recover may not be a bad thing. But I am getting better at crossovers and turning around to skate backwards, so there’s that. However, if my physical condition deteriorates much further sex is going to be very challenging. I’m hoping to make it through today injury-free. I’ve got one good arm and one good leg left. I’d like to keep them.
In bigger feelings, he added me onto his phone plan yesterday. I needed to switch carriers because I’ve been tearing through my data allotment at work and am consistently charged overage fees. We both got new phones and my carrier switch and now we’re on a plan together. It feels like a big commitment, even though I can just split off if something goes wrong. Still. It’s a family plan.
[/quote]
As a teaching moment, look ye here, even the tiniest sliver of commitment means a lot to wimminz…
So, dont give it away lightly…
[quote]csulli wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
One of the things I think about when dealing with money stuff is the resentment I’ve read on here about women using men, men getting the short end of the stick, women being conniving and money-oriented, etc. So it’s important to me not to give the impression that I am after financial benefit. I don’t want to be an asshole. Plus, delightfully enough, I get paid to go to work every day, which affords me the luxury of pulling my own weight (although we’d have to weigh less for it to be totally even; more pizza and less nice restaurants).
Still, he seems genuinely miffed when I get there first, or when I insist on buying groceries because I’m cooking at my house, but he’s thrown shampoo and razors in. So I dunno. I’m not sure which way to go.
I like doing traditional things, so that’s not a problem. I’m just not sure what they are in our context, or how to go about them.[/quote]
When we want to pay for the girl and she doesn’t let us, it’s actually pretty annoying. Just let him pay for what he wants. I know you are a gracious person and you won’t take him for granted. He will pick up on that very obviously and know you’re not just taking advantage of him; trust me.
Also it’s annoying when you try to carry something for a girl and they’re like “No I got it.” And I’m like “Dammit I have to prove my worth by lifting things; stop stifling me!”.
So there >:P[/quote]
Ack, now not only do I not bring anything to the relationship but my fancy vocabulary and that one exceptionally good leg, but I’m irritating to boot?
I do like it when he lifts things. I like it when he cooks! I came home from work one night last week and he’d cooked dinner and organized my refrigerator. It was nice. Very.
How do I prove MY worth, though? Sex is a shared thing, so it’s not that.
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
How do I prove MY worth, though? Sex is a shared thing, so it’s not that.
[/quote]
The classic is sexual access against committed relationship.
So, yes, it is.
And, even the nicest of nice guys is much more perverted than you could possibly imagine so, well, its kind of hard to overdo it.
The only thing he wants is that you are not A raging slut but HIS raging slut.
Plus, loyalty and emotional support are kind of nice.
How do I phrase this gently…
Without sex and emotional support what does he need you for?
Simply give him lots of it and all will be fine.
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
Thank you all for your good wishes.
He’s off playing pick-up hockey this morning and I am (ostensibly) running and cleaning. Then we’re going to do public skate, because this is the last day of ice. It’s a good thing - I have a cracked tailbone and yesterday I fell on my arm and it keeps dislocating or something. So several months to recover may not be a bad thing. But I am getting better at crossovers and turning around to skate backwards, so there’s that. However, if my physical condition deteriorates much further sex is going to be very challenging. I’m hoping to make it through today injury-free. I’ve got one good arm and one good leg left. I’d like to keep them.
In bigger feelings, he added me onto his phone plan yesterday. I needed to switch carriers because I’ve been tearing through my data allotment at work and am consistently charged overage fees. We both got new phones and my carrier switch and now we’re on a plan together. It feels like a big commitment, even though I can just split off if something goes wrong. Still. It’s a family plan.
[/quote]
As a teaching moment, look ye here, even the tiniest sliver of commitment means a lot to wimminz…
So, dont give it away lightly…[/quote]
It’s an intertwining of finances. It scares me. WHAT IF IT’S A SLIPPERY SLOPE AND WE INTERTWINE MORE?
Do you think Hockey gave it away too lightly?