[quote]sen say wrote:
[quote]Derek542 wrote:
Are you asking me Or the collective?
[/quote]
Just you…I’ve put everyone else on the site on ‘ignore’ so I can pretend it’s just us 2 pals.[/quote]
Lol
[quote]sen say wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
Yeah, but this was a CAUTIONARY TALE on some level, not that lovey dovey drivel that we see it as.
[/quote]
What are you talking about? “CAUTIONARY TALE?” It’s by Shakespeare…William Shakespeare…it happened for real…history type stuff.[/quote]
They BOTH FUCKING DIE AT THE END?
Fuck.
[quote]Derek542 wrote:
Key to successful marriage = ass to mouth [/quote]
If you say so.
[quote]sen say wrote:
I think bigamy should be legalized. Think about it…I am a desirable male…I’ve risen to the top of my profession…have money, shelter, food…I can support more than one woman…more than one woman wants me to support them…I’ve already got my Primary Wife…what do I care if some dumb slut banged 20 or 50 guys before age 22…I could use some slut slots to bang and to do the washing and dishes (the sluts, not their slots)…the other males out there aren’t as capable as I am…get the gummint to legalize this, send these cum buckets my way and we’ll turn this mess around![/quote]
That makes for a very violent society.
[quote]orion wrote:
They BOTH FUCKING DIE AT THE END?
Fuck. [/quote]
Am I crazy, or did everyone else also think he was saying this type of thing was a good idea!?!?
Fuck.
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]sen say wrote:
I think bigamy should be legalized. Think about it…I am a desirable male…I’ve risen to the top of my profession…have money, shelter, food…I can support more than one woman…more than one woman wants me to support them…I’ve already got my Primary Wife…what do I care if some dumb slut banged 20 or 50 guys before age 22…I could use some slut slots to bang and to do the washing and dishes (the sluts, not their slots)…the other males out there aren’t as capable as I am…get the gummint to legalize this, send these cum buckets my way and we’ll turn this mess around![/quote]
That makes for a very violent society. [/quote]
I ain’t gonna sweat it. I got all the women. I got strong fortifications on my house and I got plenty of fire power. I got three strong sons to help me protect and defend. I have a motherfucking dog with teeth. Just try taking my women now that you and the other Betas don’t have aging cum-dumpsters to exploit any longer now that I got them doing my wash and dishes.
[quote]sen say wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
They BOTH FUCKING DIE AT THE END?
Fuck. [/quote]
Am I crazy, or did everyone else also think he was saying this type of thing was a good idea!?!?
Fuck.[/quote]
Alright, Romeo and Juliet did not do as they were told, oh no, they had to go their own way, with their respective family´s rivals at that.
Doesnt really work out, both die.
That tale does not really encourage teenagers to make their own choices, does it?
And back then, they usually had none.
This play reinforces the social norms of that day.
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
[quote]therajraj wrote:
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
She makes more than I do, (most) everything I have we accumulated together.
[/quote]
Marriages where the woman contributes 60% or more to household income have extremely high divorce rates.[/quote]
Source? So is there a time frame I should be worried? Been together 23 years, married 18 and it is not nearly the struggle now as it was in our younger years. Of course if you want to look at it that way, anyone can fuck you over at any time.[/quote]
it’s possible, a lot of times you hear stories about how the woman gets bored and has an affair
Romeo and Juliet is about two kids from warring families who fall in love, die for each other and force their relatives to settle their differences.
[quote]sardines12 wrote:
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
[quote]therajraj wrote:
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
She makes more than I do, (most) everything I have we accumulated together.
[/quote]
Marriages where the woman contributes 60% or more to household income have extremely high divorce rates.[/quote]
Source? So is there a time frame I should be worried? Been together 23 years, married 18 and it is not nearly the struggle now as it was in our younger years. Of course if you want to look at it that way, anyone can fuck you over at any time.[/quote]
it’s possible, a lot of times you hear stories about how the woman gets bored and has an affair[/quote]
I’ve never heard a case where a woman cheated on her alpha husband/boyfriend. It’s always seems to be beta guys whose wives/girlfriends have an affair.
Talking real life cases here, not made-for-TV stories.
I’m not going to say it’s 100% the guy’s fault, but it’s kind of his fault. A guy who doesn’t maintain his girl’s interest, especially when it reaches the point when she stops respecting him, is doing something quite wrong.
[quote]LoRez wrote:
[quote]sardines12 wrote:
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
[quote]therajraj wrote:
[quote]Testy1 wrote:
She makes more than I do, (most) everything I have we accumulated together.
[/quote]
Marriages where the woman contributes 60% or more to household income have extremely high divorce rates.[/quote]
Source? So is there a time frame I should be worried? Been together 23 years, married 18 and it is not nearly the struggle now as it was in our younger years. Of course if you want to look at it that way, anyone can fuck you over at any time.[/quote]
it’s possible, a lot of times you hear stories about how the woman gets bored and has an affair[/quote]
I’ve never heard a case where a woman cheated on her alpha husband/boyfriend. It’s always seems to be beta guys whose wives/girlfriends have an affair.
Talking real life cases here, not made-for-TV stories.
I’m not going to say it’s 100% the guy’s fault, but it’s kind of his fault. A guy who doesn’t maintain his girl’s interest, especially when it reaches the point when she stops respecting him, is doing something quite wrong.[/quote]
But… but…that would mean that this whole “game” stuff (Fuck you Neil Strauss, btw, and thank you too I guess) is more important for men who are in a relationship than for those without one.
That cannot be, I heard it is all about banging ditzy, drunken college chicks?
/derp
I, ummm - think that in your wifes eyes, you were an Alpha Male prior to getting married, and are now a Beta Male -
[quote]sen say wrote:
[quote]LoRez wrote:
How exactly DO you assess who would or wouldn’t make a good marriage partner? Just considering the degree of give-and-take that has to happen in an LTR especially if you’ve cohabitated – which is always bound to bring up a number of issues – how do you go from that?
I’m looking for something a little more useful than “if you’re having doubts, maybe you shouldn’t”.
[/quote]
I looked at it from “Would I be happy without this person” and the answer was no. We’ve been married 18 years. Dated like 6 months before proposing. Lived together for 3 of those 6 months. Had known her for many years prior.
We’ve worked hard to make it work and every day is not happy puppies and flowers. So…the important thing to think about is it’s a lot of fucking work to have a happy marriage. Is the person you’re thinking about marrying going to work as hard as you to stay happy?
More concretely, if you have a college degree, I wouldn’t recommend marrying someone without one and vice versa. I basically wouldn’t recommend marrying anyone outside of your socio-economic group. If you can find someone you’ve known all your life also that helps. You don’t have to deal with ‘her friends’ and ‘your friends’…everyone already knows everyone.
[/quote]
That’s good advice about the socioeconomic equality aspect, just regarding dating in general.
I’m happy with her, but things were pretty tumultuous there for awhile. And here and there, every few months, things just snap and blow up for a bit, and it takes a few days to recover from it. Things work 98% of the time, but there’s those 2% where things REALLY REALLY don’t work. While those situations have gotten less frequent but they haven’t gone away. And it’s those times that make me question the whole thing.
I’m not really going to blame her (I mean, sure, as far as I know she’s the one who instigates things, but I can’t say that without bias.) Neither of us had this problem in prior relationships, so it’s something unique to our dynamic. And it’s that aspect that makes me question the sustainability.
If it weren’t for that 2%, there’d be little doubt.
I just never heard about this with other [good] relationships… whether it’s because it just doesn’t happen, or whether it’s because it all happens behind closed doors, I don’t know.
[quote]LoRez wrote:
[quote]sen say wrote:
[quote]LoRez wrote:
How exactly DO you assess who would or wouldn’t make a good marriage partner? Just considering the degree of give-and-take that has to happen in an LTR especially if you’ve cohabitated – which is always bound to bring up a number of issues – how do you go from that?
I’m looking for something a little more useful than “if you’re having doubts, maybe you shouldn’t”.
[/quote]
I looked at it from “Would I be happy without this person” and the answer was no. We’ve been married 18 years. Dated like 6 months before proposing. Lived together for 3 of those 6 months. Had known her for many years prior.
We’ve worked hard to make it work and every day is not happy puppies and flowers. So…the important thing to think about is it’s a lot of fucking work to have a happy marriage. Is the person you’re thinking about marrying going to work as hard as you to stay happy?
More concretely, if you have a college degree, I wouldn’t recommend marrying someone without one and vice versa. I basically wouldn’t recommend marrying anyone outside of your socio-economic group. If you can find someone you’ve known all your life also that helps. You don’t have to deal with ‘her friends’ and ‘your friends’…everyone already knows everyone.
[/quote]
That’s good advice about the socioeconomic equality aspect, just regarding dating in general.
I’m happy with her, but things were pretty tumultuous there for awhile. And here and there, every few months, things just snap and blow up for a bit, and it takes a few days to recover from it. Things work 98% of the time, but there’s those 2% where things REALLY REALLY don’t work. While those situations have gotten less frequent but they haven’t gone away. And it’s those times that make me question the whole thing.
I’m not really going to blame her (I mean, sure, as far as I know she’s the one who instigates things, but I can’t say that without bias.) Neither of us had this problem in prior relationships, so it’s something unique to our dynamic. And it’s that aspect that makes me question the sustainability.
If it weren’t for that 2%, there’d be little doubt.
I just never heard about this with other [good] relationships… whether it’s because it just doesn’t happen, or whether it’s because it all happens behind closed doors, I don’t know.[/quote]
Its not whether you argue with a woman, its how you argue.
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]LoRez wrote:
I’m happy with her, but things were pretty tumultuous there for awhile. And here and there, every few months, things just snap and blow up for a bit, and it takes a few days to recover from it. Things work 98% of the time, but there’s those 2% where things REALLY REALLY don’t work. While those situations have gotten less frequent but they haven’t gone away. And it’s those times that make me question the whole thing.
I’m not really going to blame her (I mean, sure, as far as I know she’s the one who instigates things, but I can’t say that without bias.) Neither of us had this problem in prior relationships, so it’s something unique to our dynamic. And it’s that aspect that makes me question the sustainability.
If it weren’t for that 2%, there’d be little doubt.
I just never heard about this with other [good] relationships… whether it’s because it just doesn’t happen, or whether it’s because it all happens behind closed doors, I don’t know.[/quote]
Its not whether you argue with a woman, its how you argue.
[/quote]
Meaning what?
[quote]LoRez wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]LoRez wrote:
I’m happy with her, but things were pretty tumultuous there for awhile. And here and there, every few months, things just snap and blow up for a bit, and it takes a few days to recover from it. Things work 98% of the time, but there’s those 2% where things REALLY REALLY don’t work. While those situations have gotten less frequent but they haven’t gone away. And it’s those times that make me question the whole thing.
I’m not really going to blame her (I mean, sure, as far as I know she’s the one who instigates things, but I can’t say that without bias.) Neither of us had this problem in prior relationships, so it’s something unique to our dynamic. And it’s that aspect that makes me question the sustainability.
If it weren’t for that 2%, there’d be little doubt.
I just never heard about this with other [good] relationships… whether it’s because it just doesn’t happen, or whether it’s because it all happens behind closed doors, I don’t know.[/quote]
Its not whether you argue with a woman, its how you argue.
[/quote]
Meaning what?[/quote]
Meaning, the high class people I met in my life did not call me a dickhead, arsehole or some such, even when they vehemently disagreed with my thoughts or actions they kept it on topic and polite.
They got loud and emotional, but never unfair and demeaning.
At least not on purpose.
There also is the book “Blink” where one guy says that after having watched 2 gazillion couples interact he can tell whether it will work out or not.
What he uses is whether they respect each other, even in the heat of the moment, or not.
[quote]Edgy wrote:
I, ummm - think that in your wifes eyes, you were an Alpha Male prior to getting married, and are now a Beta Male - [/quote]
Then you like, totally need some game bro…
Btw, this gorilla actually has “game”.
It is not what he does, it is what he is.
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]LoRez wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]LoRez wrote:
I’m happy with her, but things were pretty tumultuous there for awhile. And here and there, every few months, things just snap and blow up for a bit, and it takes a few days to recover from it. Things work 98% of the time, but there’s those 2% where things REALLY REALLY don’t work. While those situations have gotten less frequent but they haven’t gone away. And it’s those times that make me question the whole thing.
I’m not really going to blame her (I mean, sure, as far as I know she’s the one who instigates things, but I can’t say that without bias.) Neither of us had this problem in prior relationships, so it’s something unique to our dynamic. And it’s that aspect that makes me question the sustainability.
If it weren’t for that 2%, there’d be little doubt.
I just never heard about this with other [good] relationships… whether it’s because it just doesn’t happen, or whether it’s because it all happens behind closed doors, I don’t know.[/quote]
Its not whether you argue with a woman, its how you argue.
[/quote]
Meaning what?[/quote]
Meaning, the high class people I met in my life did not call me a dickhead, arsehole or some such, even when they vehemently disagreed with my thoughts or actions they kept it on topic and polite.
They got loud and emotional, but never unfair and demeaning.
At least not on purpose.
There also is the book “Blink” where one guy says that after having watched 2 gazillion couples interact he can tell whether it will work out or not.
What he uses is whether they respect each other, even in the heat of the moment, or not.
[/quote]
OMG! I agree with you! I’m not familiar with Blink, but I am familiar with Dr. John Gottman’s research: You are being redirected...
And yes, it’s the respect or lack of it that determine success. Criticism, contempt, stonewalling, and withdrawal are what he calls “the four horsemen of the apocalypse.”
Key findings of his 35 years of research:
*Happily married couples behave like good friends, and they handle their conflicts in gentle, positive ways.
*Happily married couples are able to repair negative interactions during an argument, and they are able to process negative emotions fully.