Keeping a Girl from Saying 'Well Expect to Pay for It'

Off Topic
181

[quote]Chushin wrote:

Ok, then.

Perhaps things are exactly as you say they are. I am rarely arrogant enough to be 100% certain that I am right, and the other guy is wrong.

But I have to ask: What has all of this alleged “insight” done for you? Has it somehow allowed you to find a healthy, longterm, happy-making relationship?

Which kind of brings me back to my original comment: One has to wonder why the insightful gurus never seem to be the ones in successful longterm relationships.[/quote]

Also, I would really like to know how good my guess was.

Of course I do not want any details about your wife, just whether I was right or not.

182

[quote]orion wrote:

[quote]radagasdcar wrote:
I’m 23, abstinent, and its great. Give it a try![/quote]

If you do not want to stay abstinent for the rest of your life this is probably not a good idea.

Except if you are a Mormon or Amish, then, have at it. [/quote]

oh c’mon. the typical implication there would be that radagasdcar is waiting till marriage. more than just amish and mormons are SUPPOSED to do this. i respect anyone that makes this decision and even more so those that actually follow through. If i could go back and rethink my decisions to have meaningless sex, I would–that kind of behavior has pushed me in the sociopathic direction.

183

Orion gets a bit of shit his way in this thread, maybe America is a bit ahead in terms of bad blood between the dating masses.

I have used a fair bit of information from this thread and concluded that I need to back off women for a while but I wont say no to any opportunity if one presents itself.

I was out on wednesday for a sports social and it hit me, I am too old for this shit and I am becoming bored way too easily when out. It should not be like this but it is so I will be going out when its a decent theme night and not every week.

More is less apparently.

From the first pages where I made a list and some people commented on it, including Orion who said it was a good list, I will be sticking to it and listening to the advice.

I take advice from older men seriously. World-wise advice especially as I do not see anything to be gained by being miserable in a shitty 1-way relationship or struggling with credit cards.

This is what is going for me right now.

I don’t smoke, don’t eat shit (altho I cheat! :smiley: )I only drink socially, I can cook, clean, I look younger than 28, I have a solid gym plan 5 days a week, no credit card debts, I have a car and I have fun in my own time, I am studying the degree of my choice which I enjoy and I have great parents.

I wish I didn’t fuck up my early 20’s education-wise but lesson learned. Rather be 28 than 38 with a shitty job and bad relationship experience.

Thanks :slight_smile:

184

[quote]orion wrote:

[quote]radagasdcar wrote:
I’m 23, abstinent, and its great. Give it a try![/quote]

If you do not want to stay abstinent for the rest of your life this is probably not a good idea.

Except if you are a Mormon or Amish, then, have at it. [/quote]
Not Mormon or Amish…just Christian. Girls in the practicing Christian circle appreciate this kind of thing, and some girls elsewhere too.

185

[quote]orion wrote:

[quote]harrypotter wrote:
Straight to the point.

I have met women who are students like me, have a good time on the first meet and generally see each other when we can but then they give me the “dont expect to have sex without doing [insert date-type stuff here]” or something worse.

I am not after a GF in these situations and if a girl does this I just find someone else and stop seeing them, I have no problem with this whatsoever.

However.

These same girls I have been with who do the ‘paying for pussy’ talk are out on student nights and I see them pulling guys or having the fuckmenow look which every guy can spot a mile off so they’re not exactly worse off.

Why turn down regular, drunk-free sex with a guy they do like for ONS because the guy doesn’t want a GF/BF type of relationship with her.

Nothing really wrong with these girls, I am older than them at 28 where the normal university age is 18-22 but seriously, I want to avoid this in future as I have to admit I am just too straight up honest with them about it and I turn them off me.

Anyone got experience with this?[/quote]

Excuse me while I go a little PUA on you.

The SMV, or sexual market value of women is at its peak from around 17-24.

It is pretty much downhill from there.

Alas, in this period of their life they hold all the cards, which is good, because I want you to remember what that looks like, so that you remember when they no longer do.

They will never hold all the cards again, UNLESS, you marry one.

Then you are fucked.

So, in short, nothing you can do right now, you are 28, the tide will turn in around 2 years for you, save genuine affection for those who deserve it, pump and dump the rest.

Last, but not least, women in their early thirties who have all wised up and such?

Dont even shake their hand without a condom.[/quote]

totally true

186

[quote]harrypotter wrote:

I have used a fair bit of information from this thread and concluded that I need to back off women for a while but I wont say no to any opportunity if one presents itself.

[/quote]

This

Good luck from this post I think your answer is pretty simple, work on school and your future. You get that set, life will come to you.

187

[quote]radagasdcar wrote:

[quote]orion wrote:

[quote]radagasdcar wrote:
I’m 23, abstinent, and its great. Give it a try![/quote]

If you do not want to stay abstinent for the rest of your life this is probably not a good idea.

Except if you are a Mormon or Amish, then, have at it. [/quote]
Not Mormon or Amish…just Christian. Girls in the practicing Christian circle appreciate this kind of thing, and some girls elsewhere too.[/quote]

All right, if that works for you, good luck.

189

I am surprisingly interested in the conversation between our Orion, and Emily.

I say surprising, cause I am glued to the screen and appreciate the respect that they have for each other and thier opinions, however different they are, and are able to keep the discussion civil, and intelligent.

kinda gets me hot - like I’m some kinda e-voyeur or something.

carry on~

190

[quote]Chushin wrote:

[quote]orion wrote:

[quote]Chushin wrote:

Ok, then.

Perhaps things are exactly as you say they are. I am rarely arrogant enough to be 100% certain that I am right, and the other guy is wrong.

But I have to ask: What has all of this alleged “insight” done for you? Has it somehow allowed you to find a healthy, longterm, happy-making relationship?

Which kind of brings me back to my original comment: One has to wonder why the insightful gurus never seem to be the ones in successful longterm relationships.[/quote]

Also, I would really like to know how good my guess was.

Of course I do not want any details about your wife, just whether I was right or not.

[/quote]
Right about what? Not sure what you’re asking.[/quote]

So, why does it work with your wife?

Statistically speaking, she must not have had too many partners before you married and the ones she had were longterm and not drunken hook ups, there should be a SMV difference slightly in your favor and you are instinctively manly enough to push her buttons, maybe with a little exotic appeal thrown in the mix, also working in your favor.

191

[quote]radagasdcar wrote:
I’m 23, abstinent, and its great. Give it a try![/quote]

If it’s not by choice, it’s probably not that great.

192

[quote]radagasdcar wrote:

[quote]orion wrote:

[quote]radagasdcar wrote:
I’m 23, abstinent, and its great. Give it a try![/quote]

If you do not want to stay abstinent for the rest of your life this is probably not a good idea.

Except if you are a Mormon or Amish, then, have at it. [/quote]
Not Mormon or Amish…just Christian. Girls in the practicing Christian circle appreciate this kind of thing, and some girls elsewhere too.[/quote]

I hate to break it to you, but most girls in the “Christian circle” like to take it in the mouth and up the ass on a semi-regular basis.

193

[quote]Makavali wrote:

[quote]radagasdcar wrote:

[quote]orion wrote:

[quote]radagasdcar wrote:
I’m 23, abstinent, and its great. Give it a try![/quote]

If you do not want to stay abstinent for the rest of your life this is probably not a good idea.

Except if you are a Mormon or Amish, then, have at it. [/quote]
Not Mormon or Amish…just Christian. Girls in the practicing Christian circle appreciate this kind of thing, and some girls elsewhere too.[/quote]

I hate to break it to you, but most girls in the “Christian circle” like to take it in the mouth and up the ass on a semi-regular basis.[/quote]

No worries, they will find Jesus when they want to settle down.

I mean, they might have some serious mileage on the odometer and a few bumps and scratches but Christianity is all about forgiving, right?

194

[quote]orion wrote:

[quote]Makavali wrote:

[quote]radagasdcar wrote:

[quote]orion wrote:

[quote]radagasdcar wrote:
I’m 23, abstinent, and its great. Give it a try![/quote]

If you do not want to stay abstinent for the rest of your life this is probably not a good idea.

Except if you are a Mormon or Amish, then, have at it. [/quote]
Not Mormon or Amish…just Christian. Girls in the practicing Christian circle appreciate this kind of thing, and some girls elsewhere too.[/quote]

I hate to break it to you, but most girls in the “Christian circle” like to take it in the mouth and up the ass on a semi-regular basis.[/quote]

No worries, they will find Jesus when they want to settle down.

I mean, they might have some serious mileage on the odometer and a few bumps and scratches but Christianity is all about forgiving, right?[/quote]

196

[quote]cubuff2028 wrote:

[quote]orion wrote:

[quote]radagasdcar wrote:
I’m 23, abstinent, and its great. Give it a try![/quote]

If you do not want to stay abstinent for the rest of your life this is probably not a good idea.

Except if you are a Mormon or Amish, then, have at it. [/quote]

oh c’mon. the typical implication there would be that radagasdcar is waiting till marriage. more than just amish and mormons are SUPPOSED to do this. i respect anyone that makes this decision and even more so those that actually follow through. If i could go back and rethink my decisions to have meaningless sex, I would–that kind of behavior has pushed me in the sociopathic direction. [/quote]

You make a good point. I also look back and wish I hadn’t played around so much. You really can lose your feelings later on.

198

[quote]Chushin wrote:

[quote]orion wrote:

[quote]Chushin wrote:

[quote]orion wrote:

[quote]Chushin wrote:

Ok, then.

Perhaps things are exactly as you say they are. I am rarely arrogant enough to be 100% certain that I am right, and the other guy is wrong.

But I have to ask: What has all of this alleged “insight” done for you? Has it somehow allowed you to find a healthy, longterm, happy-making relationship?

Which kind of brings me back to my original comment: One has to wonder why the insightful gurus never seem to be the ones in successful longterm relationships.[/quote]

Also, I would really like to know how good my guess was.

Of course I do not want any details about your wife, just whether I was right or not.

[/quote]
Right about what? Not sure what you’re asking.[/quote]

So, why does it work with your wife?

Statistically speaking, she must not have had too many partners before you married and the ones she had were longterm and not drunken hook ups, there should be a SMV difference slightly in your favor and you are instinctively manly enough to push her buttons, maybe with a little exotic appeal thrown in the mix, also working in your favor.
[/quote]

Yeah, I guess what you wrote is true.

But then again it was also pretty much true of most of the women I was involved with. If I think about it, if you let me drop one of your “elements” for each other woman, it was true for them all. But none of those relationships lasted 20 years like this one did.

And I fail to see the insight involved in knowing that a LTR is more likely with someone who doesn’t freely have sex with others. Hell, the same thing is true for men.

Bottom line, and as Em has said over and over, it depends on what you select for. Most men have trouble seeing that you can’t make a solid relationship based on sex, but you can find your way to great sex if you truly like, respect, and value your partner. Which is not to say that attraction isn’t necessary; it is, but it’s not sufficient.

These boards filled with guys searching to find the best way to get laid. Then later they complain about how crazy, opportunistic, whatever, women are. They train like crazy for the 50 yard dash, and then wonder why they can’t complete a marathon. You want a good woman? Make that your priority and you’ll find one.

Disclaimer: Writng on my phone during a training break. May not be very coherent or eloquent expression of my views.[/quote]

Your post sounds pretty damn good to me, bud.

200

[quote]Chushin wrote:

These boards filled with guys searching to find the best way to get laid. Then later they complain about how crazy, opportunistic, whatever, women are. They train like crazy for the 50 yard dash, and then wonder why they can’t complete a marathon. You want a good woman? Make that your priority and you’ll find one.
[/quote]
This.