Interfaith relationships

Is there anyone else besides me out there who gets frustrated? I am frustrated because I dislike it that people are quick to judge in my religion, if you date someone outside of the religion, which in my case is true. I can not pick who I fall in love with. Comments or opinions, feel free. and p.s. 2daman, thanks for the compliment. you could have told me outright ("she has her moments… ")there was more to it than just what you told me you said. i am glad i saw for myself. :slight_smile:

Not at all. I’m buddhist, she’s catholic. I don’t want kids, and for some reason a couple weeks back her bio clock EXPLODED and she has to have multiple children. shrudder I am so effing screwed. Hopefully we can work this out, otherwise we won’t be getting engaged as planned.

Just a note, I taught sociology and psychology classes for years before getting into this field and this is one of the things we always discussed. The fact is (according to the psych texts) differences in religion lead to a higher chance of divorce. In fact, this is one of the top three things that can lead to divorce (the other two being sex and money issues.) I think the religion thing mainly becomes a problem when kids arrive. It may not cause divorce, but things are always smoother when couples have the same ideas about key issues like religion.

If traditional Judaism is important to you
Bionic, you will not marry a non-Jew. If it
is not important, than you won’t care. Either
way, your problem isn’t much of a problem.
Besides, your kids will be Jewish because
you are female and religion (Judaism) is
matriarchal. Now if you are a kohen…this
would be a really problem. I had a problem
because I am a kohen and my wife is an
acolyte and so I am banned from Orthodoxy. -


ya mind not using the TESTOSTERONE forum for such girlie, frilly things, bionic? huh? huh?

Brock- what if the religion of the man she marries is patriarchal? im guessing the kids are pretty much screwed in that respect...

im the sig other, btw… Heaven help me…

ok i apologize for the frilly shit. it slipped it own’t happen again. but seriously, i think as long as my future chidlren have a good religion to believe in, whehter it be christianity or an awareness of judaism, i will be pleased if they turn out good and just human beings. i’m out.

Bionic woman, in response to your most recent post: You said it would be ok as long as your kids have a ‘good’ religion, christianity or Judaism. I am confused by this comment. First of all, is religion something you believe in because you genuinely believe that it is true, or is it just something you think is good to live your life by. For me, religion is useless unless I believe it to be true. I cant understand why it wouldnt matter to you what religion your kids were. If you believe that your religion is true, then you must believe the other one to be false (at least as far as how people get to heaven, the religions are fundamentally different). How could you live believing that your kids were not going to heaven (if they ended up practicing a different religion than you did).
Basically what I am saying is that there can only be one truth. Everyone cant be right. People cant all just get to heaven in their own way (im not saying that this is what you believe). If it was me, the decision would be so extremely important to me that my kids knew the truth, and not just practiced a ‘good’ religion.

i didn’t mean to imply that only christianity or judaism were good religions; certainly i meant that i don’t want my kids growing up with no religion or, with no values or morals. this is not to say that if my kids were atheist that they would be bad people either. i just want them to turn out alright. sorry for the misinterpretation of what i said. there is no real good religion, i mean. just as long as one does not go crashing planes into huge buildings or evil things like such. thanks, and sorry agian.

This is one of the problems with religion (and there are many). In fact, religion is usually the cause of most wars. It kind of makes you wonder. Hey, religion can be a great thing. People need spirituality. But I think there are too many people that take things too far or there are religions that take things too far. When you can’t marry outside of your religion without being crucified, something is wrong. People need to take a step back and look at the big picture.

The Dogg has spoken! I totally agree. Religions have their origins from a time when humans did not know there were people of different races or even if they did, it never occurred to think of them as human. Religious faith is nothing to dismiss in a relationship however. A muslim Malaysian girl and I were totally and absolutely smitten in love when I was in undergrad. I mean we were absolutely crazy in love with each other. In the end, my refusal to convert to Islam ended the relationship, plus the fact that her going back to Malaysia provided a convenient out of the relationship. I talked to her several years later, and it seems that she never got over it. Apparently, her talking about me all the time drove away potential boyfriends. In the end, I decided to end even what remained of the friendship, because it was easier to deal with that way. The lesson? Don’t discount the powerful influence of religion, because not only does it encompass certain beliefs, but also family, traditions and customs.

sorry man i’m going to have to disagree with you here although i think its a case by case basis. NOt only do i believe In my religion (Judaism) but i also feel I owe it to my people as a whole to keep the religion going-Marry a jewish girl. Now obviously if i didnt believe in the religion things would be different but since i do than i got to believe there is some special jewish girl out there for me. ofcourse this drives some of my friends nuts b/c they want to know why i wont even date a non jewish girl and i just tell them i dont want to play with fire. i imagine for some one who is Christian it would be similiar although they dont have the pressure of keeping the religion going but like i said for me it doesnt matter b/c i believe in my religion.

Xracer - that’s like saying white should only marry white - to keep the color strong. I’m definately not Jewish, but I wouldn’t mind marrying a Jewish girl, so long as I didn’t have to convert. Hey, I’ve seen Fiddler on the Roof and thought Fyedka was a nice guy! :slight_smile:
Seriously though, my personal feeling is why CAN’T we all be right? Religion is many paths leading to the same destination. You can’t tell me that someone who lives like a saint, sacrificing himself for the good of others, is going to hell just because he went to a temple, or a mosque, or a church, or a damn shoebox for that matter!

aikigreg-you obviously missed some of brocks posts b/c unlike most religions(idont no about every religion) judaism beleaives that if you are a good person and arent jewish you go to heaven. So for example according to the pope i’m goign to hell for not beleaving in christianity however we beleaive hes goes to heaven for just being agood moral person-this is one of the main differences between the two religions. Also brock said we dont try and convert people to judaism unlike most religions, there is no such thing as a jewish misionary!!! and another thing while i seem to be ona tirade against you(no offense to you) if i beleaive in the religion than why would I not want to marry a jewish girl so that ic ould have jewish children to be brought up in the religion i beleaive. IF the person i marry is going to cause conflict with those beleifs that why would i marry her. As chris said just look at devorce rates in interfaith marriages not something that seems to work out??-xracergs

You said this in your post: “Religion is many paths leading to the same destination.” This simply can not be true. How can there be more than one “most powerful God”. There cant, there can only be one God, there can only be one truth. Dont say that its all the same God with different names either, because the Gods of different religions all have things that are fundamentally different about them, so only one of them can really be the true God, and all of the other ones must not exist. Many religions identify their God as all powerful, so this certainly leaves no room to take different paths to the same destination. If someone is not following the true God, then their path will not get them to his heaven.

I’m not trying to argue with you or convince you of something, but just as an FYI about Christianity and its difference from other religions. I hear this so much. You talk about “someone who lives like a saint, sacrificing himself for the good of others”. Yes, that is a great and wonderful thing to do, but I would just like to point out that from the standpoint of Christianity salvation is not about being good enough; its about realizing that you could never be good enough. God requires you to be perfectly holy. And, He knows you can never be perfectly holy of your own self, and so He has offered you the holiness and righteousness of Jesus—His for yours. The problem is not with God knowing our wretched state, but with us knowing it. And that is why the Law (the 10 commandments and such) was given. The purpose of the Law is to lead us to Christ. How does the Law do this? The Law is like a mirror showing us that our face is dirty and needs washed. When the Law has done its work in someone’s life the end result is that person realizing that he is hopelessly inadequate, a wretched person, guilty as a lawbreaker. In my own life I was once pretty self-righteous and legalistic. I was keeping the right rules to get God’s approval. Thankfully that didn’t last long because the more I tried to keep the Law, the more I saw how hopeless it was. The Law is good and holy and just, but when it flows through me it kills me because the problem is with me. I used to judge others to a degree. Not anymore. When the law shined the spotlight in my heart and my eyes were opened to see who I was, I say like the apostle Paul, “I am the chief of sinners”. I’m thankful that somehow I got humble and saw my need for the Savior Jesus Christ. God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble. People who remain in their pride and think they are a “good saint” because of the wonderful life they live are blind and can’t receive the truth. I didn’t mean to make this so long, but while I’m at, one more point… It’s important with Christianity to understand old covenant versus new covenant. Old covenant is before the cross; new covenant is after the cross. The old covenant is Law; the new covenant is Grace. Jesus taught under the old covenant, but proclaimed the new. Jesus buried people under the law in many of His teachings in the gospels. He said “be perfect”, “be holy as your heavenly Father is holy”, “if you look at a woman with lust you have committed adultery”, “if you hate you are guilty of murder”, “if you don’t forgive others, neither will God forgive you”. We could go on and on. Basically, people who thought they were doing pretty good keeping the Law didn’t have much to stand on after Jesus got through. Jesus tells us God is looking at your heart, not at what you are doing and saying. Who cares if you keep some outward commandments, but in your heart burn with lust, pride, anger, etc. And, Jesus did not leave us without hope. He went to the cross, took our punishment, and rose again, providing a new covenant. Now we read in the epistles (new covenant) that as a child of God, He has made us holy and perfect. He has already forgiven us of our sins, even if we don’t forgive others. He has given us His perfect righteousness. He loves us perfectly and accepts us just the way we are. That is the good news of the gospel. Christ is the end of the Law to all who believe. Now we live by a higher law, the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus. There is such a confusing mixture of law and grace among Christians today. When you mix law and grace you get confusion and dilute the message of each. Some Christians think God wants them to keep the Law, but He has told us that all have fallen short. Jesus has already fulfilled the Law. He did it, we can’t. I didn’t mean to write a sermon. Some people around here may hate my guts for writing all this, but so what. Maybe you wouldn’t know it, but I’m not a bible-thumping fanatic. Just a Christian with good quads and hams.

whatever you say dude. I know better than to argue this particular issue.

I must be some sort of witness to the heavens becasue every woman I’ve slept with claims to have seen God…they certainly called out His name enough! :slight_smile:

Hey Jason, why can’t there be more than one
path to God? Do you claim to be privy to
God’s divine plan? If so, I am all ears :slight_smile:
The Pope has recently proclaimed that
Catholicism is NOT the only path to God.
This took an immeasurable amount of guts
to say and I applaud him. There might be
more than one path to God. You don’t know
and neither do I.


TRUTH: The sense of awe and spirituality felt by the worshipper is psychologically identical regardless of whether one prays to a cross, a rock or whatever else the person deems holy.

I applaud your post. Well thought out and well said.