I Don't Trust a Man Who....

Off Topic
41

I also don’t trust a man who…

does not like dogs

does not like the prospect of his dog having at it with a random woman of questionable moral virtue

does not like rock music or is not familiar with Led Zeppelin, does not know who John Bonham is and has never owned anything at all by James Brown

does like to dance in public a lot

does not dance in the privacy of his own home to some really good grooves from time to time, if only for a few minutes.

has ever sang at a karaoke bar, regardless of blood-alcohol level

doesn’t like 'dem shugah wowls

doesn’t like football or baseball

didn’t play multiple sports as a kid up until at least the age of 13

start off a conversation about what the best sport is by saying that it’s soccer

remind people that it’s not soccer, it’s “football”

have ever had a conversation lasting more than two sentences about soccer, except to say that it sucks in more than one way

uses soy-based protein, or any other soy-based product for that matter

pays someone else, other than his kids, to do repairs around the house and yard work

can’t swim, unless they’re a quadriplegic; paraplegics have no excuse

is a paraplegic

42

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Apoklyps wrote:

[quote]goldfingers25 wrote:

does any type of recreational drug
drinks excessively

[/quote]

Alcohol is recreational drug dipshit, it’s just a legal one.

People who contradict themselves.[/quote]
He didn’t contradict himself, he simply stated a redundancy since doing a recreational drug includes drinking. If anything, he simply added to it by also stating that he doesn’t like it when people use that particular recreational drug in excess. Dipshit.[/quote]

If English is your first language, please sue the educational institution you graduated from. It is indeed a contradiction. The phrase “drinks excessively” possesses the implication that drinking in moderation is okay (i.e. he only has an issue with drinking if taken to excess), yet the phrase “does any type of recreational drug” is an absolute in terms of meaning.

I don’t trust a man who argues with me when I feel like being a semantics Nazi.

43

I don’t trust a man who pisses in a stall when there are plenty of urinals available.

44

[quote]Apoklyps wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Apoklyps wrote:

[quote]goldfingers25 wrote:

does any type of recreational drug
drinks excessively

[/quote]

Alcohol is recreational drug dipshit, it’s just a legal one.

People who contradict themselves.[/quote]
He didn’t contradict himself, he simply stated a redundancy since doing a recreational drug includes drinking. If anything, he simply added to it by also stating that he doesn’t like it when people use that particular recreational drug in excess. Dipshit.[/quote]

If English is your first language, please sue the educational institution you graduated from. It is indeed a contradiction. The phrase “drinks excessively” possesses the implication that drinking in moderation is okay (i.e. he only has an issue with drinking if taken to excess), yet the phrase “does any type of recreational drug” is an absolute in terms of meaning.

I don’t trust a man who argues with me when I feel like being a semantics Nazi.
[/quote]

This thread was just fine until you arrived…you may be excused from this thread…

45

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Apoklyps wrote:

[quote]goldfingers25 wrote:

does any type of recreational drug
drinks excessively

[/quote]

Alcohol is recreational drug dipshit, it’s just a legal one.

People who contradict themselves.[/quote]
He didn’t contradict himself, he simply stated a redundancy since doing a recreational drug includes drinking. If anything, he simply added to it by also stating that he doesn’t like it when people use that particular recreational drug in excess. Dipshit.[/quote]

46

…Uses the phrase “Team Player” while in the process of being a buddy fucker.

Tries to do the handshake thing where they sort of over squeeze, then when you squeeze back and collapse their hand, he gets all offended. You know right then that he’s going to pull some passive aggressive douchebaggery in the near future.

Can’t stop licking his lips. That is just freakin whacked out.

47

A guy who thinks it’s something to brag/whine about that he can’t live without his smart phone.

I’m 40, so I still have some of that leftover, old-fashioned thing that younger guys may not understand where I see using a phone a lot as a “girl” thing.

48

…only achievement or contribution to an organization or workplace is to create a document, form, or paperwork in general- for everybody else to fill out and turn in to another person besides himself.

49

I tend to not trust someone based off their actions towards me. That being said, some things that really stick out and set of my bullshit alarm are:

  • Anyone that seems to have a lot of non-genuine opinions about things. Usually these are the folks that just repeat things that other people have told them that they agreed with. Also known as “pruppets*”. *See Dr. Steve Brule

  • Overly naive people.

  • People who said they’ve tried everything but can’t lose weight. That’s just code for a person telling you that they are delusional and have a hard time taking responsibility for their actions.

  • People who use facebook.

  • People who can’t be serious.

  • People who can’t take a joke.

  • Bitter men that talk about how women are all back stabbing whores. Doesn’t matter if that may be true in their particular case or not, it’s still always their own fault they have that opinion.

  • Men who cry.

  • Men that want to bro hug. Seriously? Your dicks are like…tenths of an inch apart.

  • Men that complain about eating too much/complain about being fat.

50

[quote]DBCooper wrote:
I also don’t trust a man who…

start off a conversation about what the best sport is by saying that it’s soccer

remind people that it’s not soccer, it’s “football”

have ever had a conversation lasting more than two sentences about soccer, except to say that it sucks in more than one way

[/quote]

I dont trust a man who…

hates on football because they have not realised that there views have been shaped by a corrupt media system that only shows the negatives aspects of football in the attempt to protect their own interests(and back pocket).

Feel a little silly?

I pity the fool.

tweet

51

[quote]bluebrasil wrote:
drinks Buckfast

confuses football with religion

calls everyone “big man”

finishes sentences with the word “but”

thinks that “Still Game” is a documentary

(not you though, Chong, I’m just guessing about the man in your Avatar)

[/quote]

what about ending every sentence with “eh”

52

… Dyes his hair. Either deal with the salt and pepper/gray or shave it off.

[quote]i_am_ketosis wrote:

  • Men who cry. [/quote]
    I thoroughly disagree.

I’ll go so far as to say I can’t trust a guy who doesn’t cry at the death of family, friends, or pets (which usually fall somewhere between being family and friend).

53

Vulpes man… that avi has plagued me since joining these forums. Please tell me that its from a video of which you can supply me the link.

Kthanksbye

54

[quote]Otto the Ecto wrote:
Vulpes man… that avi has plagued me since joining these forums. Please tell me that its from a video of which you can supply me the link.

Kthanksbye[/quote]

x2

55

[quote]Chris Colucci wrote:
… Dyes his hair. Either deal with the salt and pepper/gray or shave it off.

[quote]i_am_ketosis wrote:

  • Men who cry. [/quote]
    I thoroughly disagree.

I’ll go so far as to say I can’t trust a guy who doesn’t cry at the death of family, friends, or pets (which usually fall somewhere between being family and friend).[/quote]

your not the only one who feels that way.

56

[quote]PimpBot5000 wrote:
…treats his parents like shit

…is racist

…is homophobic

…smirks and giggles a lot

…wears white sunglasses

…tells unbelievable anecdotes which never have any witnesses (“when I was on the fourth moon of Saturn I banged like 17 girls at once”)

…practices “active listening” and/or overuses my name in conversation[/quote]

That was a great list PimpBot. I agree with much of what you wrote PimpBot. Pimpbot, you are a funny guy. I like to read your posts PimpBot. Bye PimpBot.

57

Doesn’t like curry or any other hot/spicy food.
Doesn’t like any rock or metal music.
Claims that NOTHING bothers him.
Talks as much if not more than your average woman.
Is uber sensitive to walking more than 12ft + getting his hair wet etc.
Makes statememts such as: You just don’t do that!
Is alledgedly turned-off by even pseudo jail-bait.

58

Who posts advice like a know it all yet has no current pics up on profile.
Thinks lunk alarms should be allowed and fun in the gym should not be allowed.
Who does not want to get that big.
Who judges others based on what they think they know by post count and join date.

59

[quote]Chris Colucci wrote:
… Dyes his hair. Either deal with the salt and pepper/gray or shave it off.

[quote]i_am_ketosis wrote:

  • Men who cry. [/quote]
    I thoroughly disagree.

I’ll go so far as to say I can’t trust a guy who doesn’t cry at the death of family, friends, or pets (which usually fall somewhere between being family and friend).[/quote]

Maybe I should reiterate. I would like to go back to time when men didn’t cry so damn much. It’s become too acceptable these days for men to cry over dumb shit. Having a moment when a friend or family member passes is totally cool in my book.

60

[quote]theBird wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:
I also don’t trust a man who…

start off a conversation about what the best sport is by saying that it’s soccer

remind people that it’s not soccer, it’s “football”

have ever had a conversation lasting more than two sentences about soccer, except to say that it sucks in more than one way

[/quote]

I dont trust a man who…

hates on football because they have not realised that there views have been shaped by a corrupt media system that only shows the negatives aspects of football in the attempt to protect their own interests(and back pocket).

Feel a little silly?

I pity the fool.

tweet[/quote]
My views about soccer have been shaped by the fact that I fucking played it from the age of 5 until I was 16. I know it’s a lame fucking sport from intimate personal experience you motherfucking avian flu-riddled moron.

And yes, I do feel a little silly for responding to a fucking bird.