As in shared beliefs, to include agnostic or secular beliefs, or does it have to be a form of religion?
I’d make all marriages illegal, see how that would go.
The way I normally think of it, is that most sects of various religious exist on a spectrum. You can jump 1 MAYBE 2 sects, but beyond that you’re asking for trouble.
I would believe this applies way heavier to the states than elsewhere. Interesting point
I could see this being true, but my question was, how do you feel about two people that are not religious? Aligned in their general views, but neither identifying as any religion. Was that part of your ‘same religion’ definition? Im basically wondering if you feel that some form of religion is required for a proper marriage. And I’m in no way asking this in an incredulous manner, just curious how you feel about it.
Oh, they finally banned this dude. Amen to that.
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I second this, I’m not in the states but I don’t know many people who care about religion in general or anyone’s religious background one day or the other.
I’m inclined to think that many, and maybe a majority, of younger Americans are so secularized that they don’t pay attention to it. That probably requires an assumption that we’re talking about Judaeo/Christian differences, though. Not sure it would be as easy with a Hindu or Buddhist, so let me go ahead and admit I’m pretty much full of shit, lol.
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I don’t begrudge anyone their religious beliefs as long as they don’t preach (which is a whole separate issue).
To me, it’s just how humans try to ascribe (more) meaning to life. And to generalize, we, here in the good ol’ USA, are ruminating from a much stronger position than most others on the planet.
My favorite happy marriage story of all time is of the couple who met in a religion that prohibited marriage/relationships, found a “more forgiving” religion, married, and I believe work as leaders of their respective congregations. Adjustments.
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I wanted to return to this for just a second and say that while I skim a great number of posts, I always read yours with my full attention, because no matter what you’re posting about, your perspective is of interest to me.
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Full disclosure, since we’re in this thread: I actually had a bit of an argument with my wife last night, and left for work without it being totally resolved, and so today was a weird one because that’s a rarity for us. We did just talk on the phone and reconciled, everything is fine, but I just figured I’d throw it out there that these things happen even in a happy marriage, and as with 99% of our arguments, it was pretty silly. Not going to go into any more detail than that.
But I was and still am a bit down today as a result of that, and so I got a genuine smile out of your post, especially since I very much admire and respect your opinions. So thanks. Really.
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I just happened to pop back in this thread to see where it degraded to, and was not disappointed. Genuinely glad that’s over. I just want to hit a few random talking points regardless of GB’s involvement.
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Women sleeping around being worse than men. Does anyone (else) really think that? Sure, at a point, sleeping around is unsanitary at best. But I like getting laid. Honestly it’s a driving force. Why would that be any different for a woman? Also, why is it always the same people that simultaneously believe all women hold out on sex, while also believing any chick that gets any strange is a slut? Go get some dick gurl. Just avoid the clap.
Yes and no?
Religious background definitely plays a role, but that should and typically will resolve itself long before any true committed relationship. My fiance was very… I guess agnostic. Her family is catholic, and I was kind of her outlet to… not feel bad… about just not believing. But it was an important discussion in the beginning. Truly believing your SO will burn in hell for eternity (or whatever afterlife you choose to believe in) while you try to make to the pearly gates is a pretty large talking point.
Financially… eh. To a degree. Once again, this is something that should be handled and well transparent within the first few months. If you actively avoid the fact your SO is financially autistic, then take issue with it later, you can really only blame yourself.
Totally unrelated @Chris_Colucci how often (if ever) have you banned someone, caught them making an account, then just let them post to see the game play out? That’s got to be hard to resist. Greenboy is just too damn persistent to let a ban stop him.
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I’d consider them roughly the same tbh. As an example, I’m an atheist (raised Catholic) and the wife is an agnostic (raised Protestant).
Not necessarily, but I think some form of religion makes it more likely to succeed that no religion. The religion itself will USUALLY push an anti divorce stance on some way, as religions are keen on building strong family units to pass down the faith.
Absolutely agree.
For sure. I’m going to get a little anecdote’y here, but a number of people I’ve known have all but acted in spite of being hilariously out of range with each other on spending habits, and it tends to end nasty
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Thank YOU, because last night I was all spun up that I’d been the one to destroy the thread and possibly gb himself (was it the “protection” because I’m female?) while at the same time wondering if I’ve given indication that I’m a big slut and THEN wondering why I would let myself be triggered by it since when I meet a big slut I don’t judge her unless she’s saddened by some aspect of it.
You know, for all of the claims he made that people are chest-beating that they’re so great in these relationship threads, I think we’ve all been very honest about bumbling around making dumb mistakes and having silly fights. The difference is that the people who anger him dust off after a dumb mistake or reconcile after a silly fight (I’m guessing with relief and gratitude, as that’s how reconciliation always feels at my house). We don’t waste energy looking for external forces to blame. In my last fight - I think it was the cutting up chicken fight - I was tired and grouchy and I guess so was he. I’m not sure who got snippy first, but I’m pretty certain the patriarchy wasn’t to blame.
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That’s some next level worrying right there. That’s got more layers than an ogre.
How does he get you to cut up chicken? Semi serious question. Mrs pfury will die on the hill that she won’t be touching raw chicken without gloves.
Fwiw, I do the vast majority of the cooking, but you’d think she’s planning to go immediately rub her eyes and pick her nose with how much the concept of salmonella scares her.
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I’d love to get this line into more daily conversations.
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He’s just a fucking moron. Idk, it came across that way to me and I overthink overthinking
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Hahaha, HE was supposed to cut up the chicken (and did, but snippiness around it became the fight). While we were grocery shopping I expressed resistance to having some sort of chicken dish for dinner because I was prepping for the week and was tired or still getting over a cold or something, and I didn’t want to mess with it. He cheerfully said “I’ll cut it up!” and then I guess forgot. So I’d been in the kitchen for like 2 hours prepping for the week (entirely for myself) and had gotten everything else ready for the dinner and unloaded the dishwasher and etc, while he watched three hours of football. Which is not a problem - no upset there at all. But then I started announcing the time relative to when we were supposed to eat dinner because I assumed he remembered that he was in charge of chicken and…I don’t even know how it turned into angry chicken-cutting and angry dinner-eating, but it did! It’s like…lol and wtf?
Given the football and nature of the task, now that I think about it, it probably WAS his oppressive patriarchal assumption of superiority!
But anyway, all that to say, I don’t like touching chicken, either. I don’t mind beef at all. But chicken…eww.
(He cooks as much as I do, btw.)
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I find myself saying this often enough for it to be a personal or at least interpersonal thing. Now it has been touched upon several times by a number of people.
I think that actually makes it a real thing and not a personal quirk.
Our chicken cutting thing involves size, shape and content. I like to slice it into medallions, and she does like a jullianne then dices the crap out of it to remove any sinew.
If I wanted to eat a bunch of overly cut chicken I’d get the crap that comes in a can next to the tuna, not fresh breasts or tenders!
Then she expects me to cook up the “scraps” for the cat. Screw that cat! I’m eating that stuff. A little basil and a splash of prosecco vinegar and that stuff is down the hatch! Usually at least half of it before the cat even knows about it. “Are you eating the cats chicken again!”. 
NO. I’m eating my chicken that you ruined!
So yeah, these things can have an impact on a relationship.
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Meanwhile, we’ve got @anna_5588 eating raw chicken…
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Oh yeah, I almost forgot about that conversation 
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