Gym Bags for Real Men

Alright, Christmas is just around the corner and I need a new gym bag. I can’t find one that I like, and because I have no friends, I turn to you, the internet, for help on my quest to find the perfect gym bag. I’ve been looking around and I can’t find one that fits what I need. These bright pink gym bags held by 145ib flower boys wearing turtlenecks don’t cut it. I need a real gym bag: plain black and shaped that of a duffel bag, big enough to fit my protein powder, pre-workout, and all my pent-up self-hate. A gym bag that says “I’m going to war”, not “I’m going for a latte -extra whipped cream and a sprinkle of joy after this.” And under $50. Any help will be much appreciated. I will think of you every time I go for a new PR. Maybe even keep your profile picture in my wallet.

Is it really that hard for you to find a plain duffel bag? Jesus.

Rogue Fitness and IronMind will both sell what you’re looking for. I have an IronMind bag and it’s extremely durable, no frills.

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I have a lot of self hate so…

I’ve used a cheap navy blue Addidas bag for like 5 years. Things don’t fall out when I put them in there. Flower boys scatter away from the squat rack when they see me pull my vinegar-fresh Rehbands out of it. It could easily handle a “No Turtlenecks” patch if you wanted to sew one on. It has handles and a detachable strap for ease-of carry. The zippers zip and unzip without failure. My enemies cower in fear when they see me carrying it because they know I’m on the warpath. It used to have a firm piece of material on the bottom, but I’m not sure where that went and the bag still works fine without it. Nobody’s ever started a fight with me in the gym, so the bag is obviously working as intended.

Navy blue Addidas all the way. May you crush your enemies, see them driven before you and hear the lamentation of their women.

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You can get a TON of Glad trashbags for $50

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The only neat solution to this I have seen is those “talking” clips that you can put on your bag but they look a bit fragile and the sound quality is poor.

I think the best solution is to buy a parrot and train it to say you’re going to war.

At least then you can tell people its the parrot that is confused about what happens at a gym and not you. Plus you get to walk around with a parrot.

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Get a Filson gym bag.

I’ve literally brought mine to war (two wars, actually), hunting, and the oilfield. Also a honeymoon. Same bag.

It’s indestructible. The bag equivalent to Red Wing work boots or Carhart flame retardant coveralls.

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Nothing says “I’m going to war” like this baby

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It has also been discounted down from your budget so you also have enough left for some fearsome headwear

For added effect and to ensure everybody knows you’re a real badass get a tattoo of Jocko Willink’s face over your own.

Alternatively just go for the navy Adidas twojarslave posted.

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Where is this plethora of ‘pink gym bags’ ? I have a suggestion. Type ‘gym bag’ into google. You know what comes up? A bunch of regular fucking black gym bags. Or go to ANY sports equipment store. You know what they sell? Black gym bags.

I read a lot of dumb threads and dumb questions on this site, but this might be the lamest of the year.

Also, anyone who is THAT concerned with what their gym bag looks like has issues. Stop trying to be hardcore based on the appearance of your gym bag, and just get stronger than everyone around you. That will do the trick. I wore a pink tank top with a unicorn on it, pink socks, and tights to the gym the other day. And christmas ornaments hanging from my beard. I also deadlifted 500+ for sets of 5 on an axle bar. Your lifting should do the talking, not your fucking bag.

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Haven;t looked for a gym bag in ages, but I would guess that most sporting good stores still have the usual range of different sized inexpensive duffels based on how much crap/gear you’ve got to carry.

I will admit though that lately I’ve been hitting the gym on my way home and was considering finding a replacement for my old adidas over the shoulder bag that might have a section to throw my work shoes in.

S

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that’s exactly what I have. A gray and black adidas bag with a shoe compartment. I love it, it’s been really durable. I had an underarmour bag for a few years that wasn’t near the quality of the adidas.

Somebody is mad lol. Look buddy, I just wanted ideas for a gym bag. Of course, I had to make a joke of it and mess around, crack a couple of jokes. If me asking the Internet for quality reviews on gym bags is offensive or makes you this angry, either lower your dosage of testosterone or work on your anger control. I’m sorry my post is so “lame” or doesn’t meet your criteria for a good post. What I think is lame is someone having to comment on how strong they are in their posts. Congrats bro, you can deadlift a lot while looking like a complete tool. And even thought this post was about quality gym bags for men, I appreciate you sharing with the rest of us how strong you are.

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Hartmann, Tumi, or Filson are the quality bags you see in international travel.

I have a Hartmann. It’s more traditional. Ballistic nylon. Mine has traveled with smelly gym clothes across every continent excepting Antarctica. It still looks fine.

Tumi is very NYC rich banker. Little too Euro for me. Probably the same quality as Hartmann, but I don’t know, I’ve never owned one.

Filson is more of an outdoor brand. I’ve always liked the look, but they are canvas, and I travel where it rains, so I imagine it would smell.


This is my gym bag. It’s orange and I like it. It’s been to school, not war.

His post was about much more than how strong he is. If that’s all you got out of it, then you missed the point.

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I’m fortunate enough to leave all my gear at the gym and just bring my belongings in a drawstring bag.

Lifting Large has good bags. You can also look at what they have for sale at Ross.

Ultimately, it’s just a bag.

It’s the bag that says “I’m going to kill you and fuck your wife!”.

Those filson bags are killer, but that price tag…

I’ll probably invest in one eventually though. Since I started traveling more with my gym bag, it’d be nice to have something that’s a bit more robust.

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Any of the “big three” (Hartmann, Tumi, Filson) are going to run you ~$400 to ~$500 for a good gym bag.

It only took one trip to China with my bag exploded and personal belonging shredded and placed in a trash bag to fork out the cash for real bags. Three destroyed suits was way more expensive than one big ballistic nylon Hartmann bag.

There is also (admittedly stupid) factor of avoiding getting snotty looks from a valet at the Four Seasons when they unload crap mismatched luggage from the Uber.

The Filson is a good-looking bag and looks tough. It would fit in in a board room or an iron gym.

These are plenty good reasons.

Funny valet thing. I used to drive an older truck to and from work a lot, because I needed to haul stuff regularly. If I was going out after work, I would always go home and switch cars first, specifically so that I wouldn’t have to pull up to the valet in the truck. Now I drive a pretty slick truck, so it’s not an issue anymore.

I’ve never had to check my gym bag on a plane, I always carry it on when I need to travel with it. I recently got a set of Away bags for travel as well. I can appreciate the need for matching luggage.

An entire thread on your gym purse?