This, but I wouldn’t want to be treated with respect if I was acting like I had an entitlement to something I didn’t need (well, I probably would at the time).
[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
But you should have offered before she even brought it up. Case closed.
[/quote]
You don’t get it. There were other guys sitting. She singled me out. On a packed bus. I couldn’t move unless I make others really miserable. So some demanding rude women could have my seat.
Don’t think so. I have just as much right to it as she does. And I was there first.
My statement was relating to chivalry in general, no specific situation.
I would like to know what makes giving up your seat to a non-disabled, non-elderly woman the right thing to do in this scenario?
Is there an answer of substance more than “it’s how I was raised” ?
[quote]MaazerSmiit wrote:
This, but I wouldn’t want to be treated with respect if I was acting like I had an entitlement to something I didn’t need (well, I probably would at the time).[/quote]
Agreed.
The fact that this woman had an attitude and was demanding that you give up your seat was obviously off putting.
I think as a man you should offer up your seat but if you do not then the woman should not demand that you do. She was in the wrong there. She has no idea if you have a bad back or knee or something that would prevent you from standing for prolonged periods of time.
[quote]MaazerSmiit wrote:
I’ll hold a door open for someone, it takes zero effort and it’s funny to watch them do that funny power walk to the door that everyone seems to do.
[/quote]
LOL, I do this too. Some times, usually at the gym, I’ll hold the door open even though the person is way too far behind me at an akward distance. It’s pretty funny to see them do the power walk/jog for 2 steps then power walk hahaha. Kinda a jerk move I guess but it makes me chuckle a little on the inside.
I just think of it as helping them get a little more warmed up before they hit the weights lol
[quote]dirtman wrote:
[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
But you should have offered before she even brought it up. Case closed.
[/quote]
You don’t get it. There were other guys sitting. She singled me out. On a packed bus. I couldn’t move unless I make others really miserable. So some demanding rude women could have my seat.
Don’t think so. I have just as much right to it as she does. And I was there first.[/quote]
No my Canadian brother, you don’t get it.
It’s not about you having a right to the seat. I’ve already conceded she’s trashy for even bringing it up, but just because you have to go out of your way to do the right thing doesn’t make it the wrong thing to do, capiche?
The other guys are just as much at fault as you are. Probably more so because they were closer, but that doesn’t make it OK that you didn’t give up the seat.
And lastly, if the bus was really that packed, I find it hard to believe there wasn’t another woman standing in your vicinity for whom you could have offered your seat, thus avoiding “making everyone miserable” and also avoiding, you know, doing the wrong thing. Or are we to believe the bus was unusually chock full of passengers, but everyone standing was a man except for this ungodly rude woman?
[quote]dirtman wrote:
[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
But you should have offered before she even brought it up. Case closed.
[/quote]
You don’t get it. There were other guys sitting. She singled me out. On a packed bus. I couldn’t move unless I make others really miserable. So some demanding rude women could have my seat.
Don’t think so. I have just as much right to it as she does. And I was there first.[/quote]
You are going to run into people like this all your life and the thing you should do 99% of the time is the right thing. Get up, give her your seat, and just dont respond. Others will see what you did as respectable and what she did bitchy. Im sure it really pissed you off and I know I would be too(ive been in a similar situation) but I try not to let my emotions get the best of me.
[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
[quote]dirtman wrote:
[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
But you should have offered before she even brought it up. Case closed.
[/quote]
You don’t get it. There were other guys sitting. She singled me out. On a packed bus. I couldn’t move unless I make others really miserable. So some demanding rude women could have my seat.
Don’t think so. I have just as much right to it as she does. And I was there first.[/quote]
No my Canadian brother, you don’t get it.
It’s not about you having a right to the seat. I’ve already conceded she’s trashy for even bringing it up, but just because you have to go out of your way to do the right thing doesn’t make it the wrong thing to do, capiche?
The other guys are just as much at fault as you are. Probably more so because they were closer, but that doesn’t make it OK that you didn’t give up the seat.
And lastly, if the bus was really that packed, I find it hard to believe there wasn’t another woman standing in your vicinity for whom you could have offered your seat, thus avoiding “making everyone miserable” and also avoiding, you know, doing the wrong thing. Or are we to believe the bus was unusually chock full of passengers, but everyone standing was a man except for this ungodly rude woman? [/quote]
The premise that your argument is based on - that giving up the seat is the right thing to do has to be proven first
If a healthy 38 year old male asked you for your seat would giving up your seat stil be the right thing to do?
Why or why not?
[quote]therajraj wrote:
[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
[quote]dirtman wrote:
[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
But you should have offered before she even brought it up. Case closed.
[/quote]
You don’t get it. There were other guys sitting. She singled me out. On a packed bus. I couldn’t move unless I make others really miserable. So some demanding rude women could have my seat.
Don’t think so. I have just as much right to it as she does. And I was there first.[/quote]
No my Canadian brother, you don’t get it.
It’s not about you having a right to the seat. I’ve already conceded she’s trashy for even bringing it up, but just because you have to go out of your way to do the right thing doesn’t make it the wrong thing to do, capiche?
The other guys are just as much at fault as you are. Probably more so because they were closer, but that doesn’t make it OK that you didn’t give up the seat.
And lastly, if the bus was really that packed, I find it hard to believe there wasn’t another woman standing in your vicinity for whom you could have offered your seat, thus avoiding “making everyone miserable” and also avoiding, you know, doing the wrong thing. Or are we to believe the bus was unusually chock full of passengers, but everyone standing was a man except for this ungodly rude woman? [/quote]
The premise that your argument is based on - that giving up the seat has to be proven first[/quote]
If you’re asking me to draw out some long, logically driven response as to why giving up your seat is the right thing to do, it’s not going to happen.
It’s like Mr. Pink’s speech in Reservoir Dogs. I don’t care how much logic he uses to support why he doesn’t tip waitresses, at the end of the day he’s just being a cheap asshole.
[quote]therajraj wrote:
If a healthy 38 year old male asked you for your seat would giving up your seat stil be the right thing to do?
Why or why not?[/quote]
Again, you’re looking for some logically driven response that will suit every specific situation, when at the end of the day we’re not talking about a 38 year old man, we’re talking about a woman.
So if you don’t agree that a man should give up his seat on a train/bus/whatever to a woman, let us skip the hypotheticals and logic traps and just agree to disagree. Sure, that makes me a better person than you, but you’re more logical so I guess we’re even. 
[quote]zecarlo wrote:
She shouldn’t have needed to ask as you should have given up your seat before it came to that. She wasn’t rude; she was simply correcting you and addressing an issue that your parents should have addressed when raising you. I take it you don’t watch westerns either. Lucas McCain would have given up his seat then kicked your ass off the bus. [/quote]
This is dead on.
[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
It’s like Mr. Pink’s speech in Reservoir Dogs. I don’t care how much logic he uses to support why he doesn’t tip waitresses, at the end of the day he’s just being a cheap asshole. [/quote]
^^This isn’t true IMO. Waitresses (or any person working in an industry that receives tips) isn’t entitled to a tip.
If they do not preform their jobs very well/exceptionally then they do not deserve a tip.
I am a very good tipper because I used to work a job that relied heavily on tips… But if I didn’t do my job well I didn’t expect a tip.
[quote]doogie wrote:
[quote]zecarlo wrote:
She shouldn’t have needed to ask as you should have given up your seat before it came to that. She wasn’t rude; she was simply correcting you and addressing an issue that your parents should have addressed when raising you. I take it you don’t watch westerns either. Lucas McCain would have given up his seat then kicked your ass off the bus. [/quote]
This is dead on.
[/quote]
You mean “this is dead wrong.”
She WAS rude. She WAS out of line.
[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
[quote]therajraj wrote:
If a healthy 38 year old male asked you for your seat would giving up your seat stil be the right thing to do?
Why or why not?[/quote]
Again, you’re looking for some logically driven response that will suit every specific situation, when at the end of the day we’re not talking about a 38 year old man, we’re talking about a woman.
So if you don’t agree that a man should give up his seat on a train/bus/whatever to a woman, let us skip the hypotheticals and logic traps and just agree to disagree. Sure, that makes me a better person than you, but you’re more logical so I guess we’re even.
[/quote]
Better person?
Sir, I think your desire to infantilize women is sexist and therefore harmful to women.
[quote]gregron wrote:
[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
It’s like Mr. Pink’s speech in Reservoir Dogs. I don’t care how much logic he uses to support why he doesn’t tip waitresses, at the end of the day he’s just being a cheap asshole. [/quote]
^^This isn’t true IMO. Waitresses (or any person working in an industry that receives tips) isn’t entitled to a tip.
If they do not preform their jobs very well/exceptionally then they do not deserve a tip.
I am a very good tipper because I used to work a job that relied heavily on tips… But if I didn’t do my job well I didn’t expect a tip.[/quote]
If a waitress is a complete retard and messes everything up, I give you that. But if a waitress does an “average” job, they still deserve a tip. Because honestly, 8/10 times you go out to eat, you’re getting an “average” waitress and if you’re not tipping each of those people because they were only “average”, you’re being cheap.
There were threads on this in the past.
I personally try to treat ever women I meet with the same respect and dignity that I hope others treat my mother, wife, and daughter with. So I probably would have stood as well.
My position: if there is some extenuating circumstance for a person requiring a seat, I will happily give it up male or female.
I don’t consider myself obligated to give up my seat to a healthy bodied person just because they are female
[quote]therajraj wrote:
[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
[quote]therajraj wrote:
If a healthy 38 year old male asked you for your seat would giving up your seat stil be the right thing to do?
Why or why not?[/quote]
Again, you’re looking for some logically driven response that will suit every specific situation, when at the end of the day we’re not talking about a 38 year old man, we’re talking about a woman.
So if you don’t agree that a man should give up his seat on a train/bus/whatever to a woman, let us skip the hypotheticals and logic traps and just agree to disagree. Sure, that makes me a better person than you, but you’re more logical so I guess we’re even.
[/quote]
Better person?
Sir, I think your desire to infantilize women is sexist and therefore harmful to women.
[/quote]
Lol, obviously that part was in jest, I’m hoping your response was as well.
Ya of course, no anger here