[quote]Digital Chainsaw wrote:
Donut62 wrote:
No weird relationships here, but one friend of had one that comes to mind. He comes from a VERY strict Indian family. He is a very normal college guy with a liberal social life and what not, but he had to put up quite the front at home or else get disowned. He dated this one real nice, good looking girl for 3 years as an undergrad. However, she was white, and if his parents knew that he was with a non-Indian woman they probably would have killed themselves. So literally, he had to hide the fact that he was dating a girl from his own family for a few years, and when they figured out he was with someone he had to find excuses to keep them from ever seeing her and knowing she was white. Meanwhile, he was hanging out with her family and hanging out at her house and what not. They ended up ending it, and I assume that the stress of his family put it over the edge.
For someone who is not from a family like that, it seemed very strange to me that your parents could control your life like that.
No kidding! Had the same thing happen when I dated an Indian girl about 10 years ago. She was 21 and still lived at home, and her mom was totally cool with me, and apparently her father was too, or so I thought.
To my face, the guy was all smiles and handshakes, but behind closed doors, he would berate his wife for raising a daughter (apparently, this is strictly a wife’s responsibility in this culture, as raising a son is the husband’s) who would choose not to date an Indian man. I guess he figured that if he ripped into his daughter, he would drive her away and he would lose his control over her, so he manipulated her by driving her mom to tears, something she hated to see.
Call it culture or whatever, I call it cowardly bullshit. If the guy had told me to fuck off directly, I may not have liked him, but I would at least have had some modicum of respect for him for standing up for what he believed (even though I thought he was wrong) man-to-man, rather than verbally abusing his wife to get his way.
As one can probably guess, the girl I was dating, no picture of mental toughness to begin with, started hemming and hawing about our relationship, which made me frustrated, and the whole thing went to hell pretty quickly.
I just couldn’t grasp how an adult (in age, at least) could be that jerked around by her parents. Then again, I suppose I was biased, having told my family to get bent years earlier.[/quote]
Well, here’s one…my girlfriend of 9 months is South Korean. I met her whilst we were both in Australia. We were apart for 2 months when my Australian visa ran out and i came back to England. She came to visit me 4 weeks ago then buggered off around Europe with her backpack…and we will spend another month together from early December until early January when her visa expires…after that who know? Teaching English in South Korea?
And she told me her dad, like quite a lot of older korean males apparently, would “kill her” if he found out about us, me being western and all. But i guess i dont have to worry about that unless i go over there lol
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