[quote]mitche11 wrote:
So i guess my question is this: What makes people like this think that as soon as they step into a gym, pull on some gloves and hop on a machine think that they are qualified to give anyone advice - no scratch that INTRUCTION?!
[/quote]
Same reason some post here? They aren’t sharing knowledge, they are recruiting. “please join me in my way of thinking”
I never seem to have this problem. Attitude is everything. Are you playing “grab ass” when in the gym?
If you treat the gym like a social hour, then people will approach you to talk. If you treat it like a santuary, people will know to stay away from you.
By “social hour,” I mean this: Do you take long rest periods, walk back-and-forth to the water fountain, smile, chuckle, and spend a lot of time making small talk. Most people do, and they suffer the consequences.
I go in, lift, keep my headphones on and rarely make eye contact with anyone. When I do make eye contact, my head is tilted slightly down, so that my eyes have to “roll” upwards to see the other person. (This is a freaky look with a touch of condesetion that says, “You’re not important enough to talk to me. So go away.” Try it sometime.)
Every once in a while, someone gives me a strange look as I do overhead squats. But they don’t talk to me.
When someone hovers around the power rack (they’re usually too trepid to break the ice), I ask them what they need it for. If they say squats, cleans, push presses, etc., then I invite them to work in with me.
If it’s to do curls, I literally chuckle to myself (loud enough for them to hear) and say, “curls, heh, what a douchebag,” put my headphones back in, and get back to work. That always scares them away.
So, go in with the right mindset - which is that what you are about to do is very serious business. If you have that mindset, then people will not give you unsolicited advice.
[quote]mitche11 wrote:
Took me 15 min just to get rid of this moron, i had bugger all time before work to get the training done, i did not have time for the fool.
[/quote]
Come to think of it… Only twice in my many years of lifting has any stranger ever even spoken to me. The first time was when a top 100 PL said, “Hey, you can tell me to go to Hell if you want, but if you changed your stance on squats, you could lift more weights.” We ended up becoming good friends.
The second time was when someone from the Human Kinetics pub. co. saw me squatting in a YMCA. She approached me and said, “Your squat form is really good. I’ve never seen anyone here squat properly.” I should have had my mind in the gutter, as she was a hottie. I just said, “Thanks,” and got back to work.
Anyhow, like I said, I don’t look like that “Caveman” guy from the “Bad Ass Mo-Fo” column. But I do look serious, and that’s about all it takes to keep people away.
[quote]CaliforniaLaw wrote:
I never seem to have this problem. Attitude is everything. Are you playing “grab ass” when in the gym?
If you treat the gym like a social hour, then people will approach you to talk. If you treat it like a santuary, people will know to stay away from you.
By “social hour,” I mean this: Do you take long rest periods, walk back-and-forth to the water fountain, smile, chuckle, and spend a lot of time making small talk. Most people do, and they suffer the consequences.
I go in, lift, keep my headphones on and rarely make eye contact with anyone. When I do make eye contact, my head is tilted slightly down, so that my eyes have to “roll” upwards to see the other person. (This is a freaky look with a touch of condesetion that says, “You’re not important enough to talk to me. So go away.” Try it sometime.)
Every once in a while, someone gives me a strange look as I do overhead squats. But they don’t talk to me.
When someone hovers around the power rack (they’re usually too trepid to break the ice), I ask them what they need it for. If they say squats, cleans, push presses, etc., then I invite them to work in with me.
If it’s to do curls, I literally chuckle to myself (loud enough for them to hear) and say, “curls, heh, what a douchebag,” put my headphones back in, and get back to work. That always scares them away.
So, go in with the right mindset - which is that what you are about to do is very serious business. If you have that mindset, then people will not give you unsolicited advice.
[/quote]
The unfortunate fact is this doesn’t work for everyone. Beginners(i.e. those lacking a certain physical stature) and women tend to have a lot of trouble with unsolicited “advice” no matter how they carry themselves.
There is a guy about my age I sometimes end up sharing the weight room with. I’m often taken aback by how similar his training routines are to some I’ve done in the past or plan to do.
His appearance(skinny) and working weight make it seem like he’s pretty new(could be comign back from injury or have some other obstacle though), but he’s putting in a quality workout everytime I see him there. Moves with purpose, doesn’t take off his headphones and writes everything down. The guy really seems to have gotten off to a great start.
Unfortunatly, people won’t leave this poor guy alone. I’ve seen people actually inturupt this guy during a heavy set of box squats, motion to him to take off his headphones, and say things like, “You’re going too heavy.” or “What’s that for?”. I sit there and wonder what the heck I’d do if they ever did that to me. I figure 20 curse works within about 6-7 seconds is the most likely outcome.
With him my guess would be people don’t find him physically intimidating and are comfortable bothering him.
Also, I once read a blog entry by a female figure competitor who was venting over how comfortable her fellow gym goers were with interupting her mid workout or even mid set. A female may not be able to find any peace no matter how long she has been training.
You know… I just don’t get it. I’m not big by any defintion. So I really do think it’s attitude. (Also, people do not make small talk with me on airplanes.)
Also, some people are too accomodating. Yesterday at the gym, some fat ass kept trying to chat up a girl doing swiss ball exercises. He kept saying things, and she kept saying, “uh-huh,” etc. She was obviously annoyed but wouldn’t “man up” and say, “Dude, I don’t want to talk to you. Get the fuck away from me.”
People are too afraid of offending others. I am very polite, but good manners doesn’t require me to have my time in the gym STOLEN by losers. So the way to end the conversation is to END it. Don’t be “polite” to time-thieves. Treat them like any thief: Confidently and assertively tell them to get the fuck away.
Of course, my demeanor already says “Stay the fuck away from me.” Remember, to win without fighting is best. Likewise, to yell at losers without opening your mouth is best.
[quote]Zell959 wrote:
The unfortunate fact is this doesn’t work for everyone. Beginners(i.e. those lacking a certain physical stature) and women tend to have a lot of trouble with unsolicited “advice” no matter how they carry themselves.
There is a guy about my age I sometimes end up sharing the weight room with. I’m often taken aback by how similar his training routines are to some I’ve done in the past or plan to do.
His appearance(skinny) and working weight make it seem like he’s pretty new(could be comign back from injury or have some other obstacle though), but he’s putting in a quality workout everytime I see him there. Moves with purpose, doesn’t take off his headphones and writes everything down. The guy really seems to have gotten off to a great start.
Unfortunatly, people won’t leave this poor guy alone. I’ve seen people actually inturupt this guy during a heavy set of box squats, motion to him to take off his headphones, and say things like, “You’re going too heavy.” or “What’s that for?”. I sit there and wonder what the heck I’d do if they ever did that to me. I figure 20 curse works within about 6-7 seconds is the most likely outcome.
With him my guess would be people don’t find him physically intimidating and are comfortable bothering him.
Also, I once read a blog entry by a female figure competitor who was venting over how comfortable her fellow gym goers were with interupting her mid workout or even mid set. A female may not be able to find any peace no matter how long she has been training.[/quote]
I’ve got the opposite problem. I don’t know if it because I look especially knowledgeable or unintimidating but I have a lot of beginners or casual lifters approach me with questions.
My routine is nothing like the shitty mostly machine exercises routine that the gym gives out when beginners sign up, so when the average machine bench presser sees me doing something like heavy good mornings they’re very curious and want to ask me about it between sets.
[quote]CaliforniaLaw wrote:
I never seem to have this problem. Attitude is everything. Are you playing “grab ass” when in the gym?
If you treat the gym like a social hour, then people will approach you to talk. If you treat it like a santuary, people will know to stay away from you.
By “social hour,” I mean this: Do you take long rest periods, walk back-and-forth to the water fountain, smile, chuckle, and spend a lot of time making small talk. Most people do, and they suffer the consequences.
I go in, lift, keep my headphones on and rarely make eye contact with anyone. When I do make eye contact, my head is tilted slightly down, so that my eyes have to “roll” upwards to see the other person. (This is a freaky look with a touch of condesetion that says, “You’re not important enough to talk to me. So go away.” Try it sometime.)
Every once in a while, someone gives me a strange look as I do overhead squats. But they don’t talk to me.
When someone hovers around the power rack (they’re usually too trepid to break the ice), I ask them what they need it for. If they say squats, cleans, push presses, etc., then I invite them to work in with me.
If it’s to do curls, I literally chuckle to myself (loud enough for them to hear) and say, “curls, heh, what a douchebag,” put my headphones back in, and get back to work. That always scares them away.
So, go in with the right mindset - which is that what you are about to do is very serious business. If you have that mindset, then people will not give you unsolicited advice.
mitche11 wrote:
Took me 15 min just to get rid of this moron, i had bugger all time before work to get the training done, i did not have time for the fool.
[/quote]
Please, nobody be like this guy.
Fake toughness is so easy to spot.
C Law–I dream of guys like you visiting my weightroom. I especially like the ones who look at me condescendingly and try to judge my importance.
In the gym or in life–you get more bees with honey. That doesn’t mean being all sunny and over the top nice. It means that just like at work or wherever 99% of the time a polite response with a “if you want to talk after my workout, I’ll gladly answer some of your questions.” It almost always works. If it doesn’t you just move forward.
I suppose that’s not T-man enough for the Law, but it is the way human beings treat one another.
[quote]sasquatch wrote:
C Law–I dream of guys like you visiting my weightroom. I especially like the ones who look at me condescendingly and try to judge my importance.[/quote]
You are quite narcissistic. Truth is, I wouldn’t CARE about you. I would ignore you. And I’d hope you’d do the same.
What does that have to do with anything? People often complain about having their training sessions interrupted. Thus, there are lots of folks who don’t want to “get any bees.”
[quote]
I suppose that’s not T-man enough for the Law, but it is the way human beings treat one another.[/quote]
You are a total dork. I train on my time. When people interrupt me with silliness (well, they don’t in the gym!), they are stealing my time. No one has the “right” or is “entitled” to my time.
Anyhow, I suspect you are one of those geeks who try chatting people up in the gym. So I will not waste anymore time reasoning with you.
[quote]CaliforniaLaw wrote:
If you treat the gym like a social hour, then people will approach you to talk. If you treat it like a santuary, people will know to stay away from you.
By “social hour,” I mean this: Do you take long rest periods, walk back-and-forth to the water fountain, smile, chuckle, and spend a lot of time making small talk. Most people do, and they suffer the consequences.
I go in, lift, keep my headphones on and rarely make eye contact with anyone. When I do make eye contact, my head is tilted slightly down, so that my eyes have to “roll” upwards to see the other person. (This is a freaky look with a touch of condesetion that says, “You’re not important enough to talk to me. So go away.” Try it sometime.)
Every once in a while, someone gives me a strange look as I do overhead squats. But they don’t talk to me.
When someone hovers around the power rack (they’re usually too trepid to break the ice), I ask them what they need it for. If they say squats, cleans, push presses, etc., then I invite them to work in with me.
If it’s to do curls, I literally chuckle to myself (loud enough for them to hear) and say, “curls, heh, what a douchebag,” put my headphones back in, and get back to work. That always scares them away.
So, go in with the right mindset - which is that what you are about to do is very serious business. If you have that mindset, then people will not give you unsolicited advice.
mitche11 wrote:
Took me 15 min just to get rid of this moron, i had bugger all time before work to get the training done, i did not have time for the fool.
[/quote]
…uhhh what the hell? Hahahahahaha! I love the quasi-toughness. By the way being a deliberate jerk to people is not bad ass or “tough”, it’s insecurity and weak.
I’m sorry bro’ but I can’t take that seriously especially after you end all of this with, “…I mean don’t get me wrong I am by no means big, but attitude is all it takes.”, it seems like if a person is truly big, he has no need to “act”, and to act is still acting, fronting.
I mean describing the way you keep your head down, as to make your rolled back eyes more intimidating…lol. “Scares them away”, I think that is more delusion than anything else.
Keep giving your all mighty sacrifices to Oden God of strength, remember to look scary and show your ILS (invisible lats syndrome) to all the mere average human beings, remember to drive in your Hummer with extreme rage, powerbuilder.
I’m truly sorry if I do sound too harsh.
[quote]CaliforniaLaw wrote:
sasquatch wrote:
C Law–I dream of guys like you visiting my weightroom. I especially like the ones who look at me condescendingly and try to judge my importance.
You are quite narcissistic. Truth is, I wouldn’t CARE about you. I would ignore you. And I’d hope you’d do the same.
In the gym or in life–you get more bees with honey.
What does that have to do with anything? People often complain about having their training sessions interrupted. Thus, there are lots of folks who don’t want to “get any bees.”
I suppose that’s not T-man enough for the Law, but it is the way human beings treat one another.
You are a total dork. I train on my time. When people interrupt me with silliness (well, they don’t in the gym!), they are stealing my time. No one has the “right” or is “entitled” to my time.
Anyhow, I suspect you are one of those geeks who try chatting people up in the gym. So I will not waste anymore time reasoning with you.
[/quote]
You’ll have to define your interpretation of narcissism to me to make that even slightly comprehendable.
My, mistakenly spoken metaphor, was quite meaningful. Treating people with respect and class is mature and productive. Getting honey=getting desired results. I really didn’t think that needed translation to anyone, but…
We all train on our own time. Interruptions are part of the gym. Handling them with maturity and class is quite acceptable. You would be quite wrong with your assessment of my gym time. However, I have been known to make time for others as I see fit. Sometimes that is even in the midst of my workout. And always afterwards within a reasonable time frame.
Oh by the way, nothing you did resembled “reasoning with me!” I’m afraid that is more nomanclature that I will need to sit down with you and explain.
[quote]EmperialChina wrote:
…uhhh what the hell? Hahahahahaha! I love the quasi-toughness. By the way being a deliberate jerk to people is not bad ass or “tough”, it’s insecurity and weak. [/quote]
Please show me where I said I was a jerk to people? What I said was this: I don’t talk to people. Indeed, the entire point of my posts was this: I’m not “anything” to people.
I just do my thing and put up barriers so that people stay away from me. That’s being a jerk only if you feel you have the right to interrupt me. You don’t.
In any event, I’ll let those with reading comprehension defects have the last “word.”
Oh vey. I’ll assume you’re responding in good faith - and that you’re not a troll. So…
[quote]sasquatch wrote:
You’ll have to define your interpretation of narcissism to me to make that even slightly comprehendable.[/quote]
In your initial reply to me, you wrote: “I especially like the ones who look at me condescendingly and try to judge my importance.” This is narcissistic because is assumes I (or anyone else) would care enough about you to “look at you” at all - let alone condescendingly.
Truth is, you could be built like a rock, and I wouldn’t care enough to give you any looks.
If you read the post, and my response, you would see that the “desired result” is keeping douchebags from interrupting our training sessions with “advice.” Being sweet to such people would not lead to the desired result!
Maybe it’s okay for YOU to be interrupted. That’s cool. That’s your choice. But I do not want to be interrupted. So I do what I need to do to avoid this.
Hopefully you now understand my position on the matter.
I just tell them go to the front counter and get an appointment with a PT. I don’t get paid to hand out advice.
[quote]CaliforniaLaw wrote:
Oh vey. I’ll assume you’re responding in good faith - and that you’re not a troll. So…
sasquatch wrote:
You’ll have to define your interpretation of narcissism to me to make that even slightly comprehendable.
In your initial reply to me, you wrote: “I especially like the ones who look at me condescendingly and try to judge my importance.” This is narcissistic because is assumes I (or anyone else) would care enough about you to “look at you” at all - let alone condescendingly.
Truth is, you could be built like a rock, and I wouldn’t care enough to give you any looks.
My, mistakenly spoken metaphor, was quite meaningful. Treating people with respect and class is mature and productive. Getting honey=getting desired results. I really didn’t think that needed translation to anyone, but…
If you read the post, and my response, you would see that the “desired result” is keeping douchebags from interrupting our training sessions with “advice.” Being sweet to such people would not lead to the desired result!
Interruptions are part of the gym.
Maybe it’s okay for YOU to be interrupted. That’s cool. That’s your choice. But I do not want to be interrupted. So I do what I need to do to avoid this.
Hopefully you now understand my position on the matter.[/quote]
I could care less of your assessment of my posting.
My 'narcississtic response was directly related to your post about looking tough and deciding who was important enough to talk too. Nothing more nothing less. Condescending was your own terminology fool.
Uh, it’s not my choice to be interrupted, it just happens sometimes. You don’t have to act respectful or mature. In fact, I don’t think it possible for you to do so. But doing so has more effect in stopping it as your hilariously stupid -head down- eyes rolled- condescending stare does. I’d laugh harder at that than I would anyone curling in the squat rack.
Peace douche.
Do you really think it was worth the effort to change your name from California Law to Granola?
[quote]sasquatch wrote:
I could care less of your assessment of my posting.[/quote]
You care so little that you had to let me know, 'eh?
Again, you missed my point. I don’t decide who is “important.” I avoid talking to everyone. It works for me. YMMV.
Really? If that’s the case, then why, in several years of training at commerical gyms, have only two people interrupted me? Seems like it works!
You must not be working out very hard if you’re so focused on other people.
[quote]
Peace douche. [/quote]
LOL. Well, I suppose it’s easier to call someone names than it is to correctly use metaphors!
[quote]
Do you really think it was worth the effort to change your name from California Law to Granola?[/quote]
It took me 30 seconds. When I’m bored with this one, I’ll change it. Unlike you, I’m not narcissistic enough to think I’ll develop a “rep” with my moniker. I’m just another anonymous geek - and that suits me nicely.
Laters.
If someone approaches me with advice in the Gym, or in any asoect of my life for that matter, I will listen to them, consider what they have to say and either take it on board or dismiss it. If I don’t like what they have to say I will tell them so, politely.
I will never consider myself so advanced that I know everything and I don’t have my head stuck so far up my arse that I think that someone smaller than me or newer to the Gym than me can’t offer good advice.
Like wise if they approach me for advice. I will take time out of my routine to help them out, no problem.
It’s never gotten to a point where either scenario has affected my lifting and don’t really see how it could.
Other athletes from other individual sports such as running and cycling help each other out all the time. Yet some lifters have this attitude that everyone else in the Gym is against them.
It’s pathetic really.
Well one thing people forget is, at least the person is trying to help. That is very good-spirited of them. It is not like they are poking fun at you or anything.
Just because they don’t know what they are talking about is beside the point.
Nevertheless it is bad etiquette.
If I was at a restraunt eating a meal and someone at the next table came over and said, “excuse me, you really should not order the steak, it would be better if you ordered the chicken” then that is RUDE RUDE RUDE.
Similarly in the gym although what one person thinks is rude another thinks is OK.
Ha Ha well for the last week i have had some pretty bad insomnia… so between the huge black circles under my eyes and the vacant expression on my face, no body bothers me…
-mitch-
[quote]Kliplemet wrote:
the correct response is ultra violence[/quote]
Hahahaha!
Granola you do sound a bit… yeah. I can see why the other posters have the views they do.
I think in life, you’re always better off with communication. If I had someone interrupt at a time when I really needed to concentrate I would smile at them and say “I’m sorry but I’m busy right now, I’ll get back to you after this”.
If they get offended it’s their problem, but as someone above said, in life it’s better to go through being friendly. It’s less stress.
Those know it alls that know nothing are just as annoying as the assholes that sit on equipment in between sets, and rest for like 4 minutes.
Those two traits combined equate to a super dipshit.