Thank you so much!
My wording is off- I meant that my parents would give me crap
Decently is a bit of an understatement 
I see. If there’s ever an instance where you can at least communicate these things to them, it’s better than just not saying anything. And specifically talking about your goals with training, or things you’re dealing with.
If you have a good relationship with your parents, hopefully they’ll understand, or at least listen to you.
Hopefully I can at least make more progress concerning my own personal stuff. I’ve mostly just found high rep stuff to be what I wish to persue currently. Although I’ll make my way back to strength training as I always do.
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Don’t underestimate the program. Fatigue accumulated during the program will mask you fitness/performance. I’m still surprised after a strategic light day or some fancy periodisation why can happen. Trust the process I guess. Sleep lots and do all the recovery things in the lead up.
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Having a good hormonal profile that makes you healthy will help strength/performance.
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no offense taken
I have actually somehow managed to get healthier while producing worse labs 
She, and I, thought everything was going great… until my bloodwork came back with lower numbers. My gynocologist is similarly confused and insists on hammering the point that I need to get fatter. My mom’s great, but definitely doesn’t take bad news well
How about we replace that with “putting on some healthy lipids onto my frame” so it doesn’t sound so bad as you make it out to be?
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I know, that I’ve wrote about this too many time here, but I will say this again- you won’t be fatter if you gain 4-5 kg, you will be normal. If you incerease your BF to a normal level like 18-20% there’s a big chance in time to improve your hormon levels. This is not fat, most of women would kill for this % in line of your level of muscle development and strengh and conditioning, you would be miraculous.
It’s not a solution but it’s better way than try to hack the tests or to tourture your body at this starvation mode. And as I said starvation, I don’t mean you feel it- obviously you don’t have appetite, that is not good at all. A healthy person with normal hormon levels would have stronger appetite as stronger he train. Every calorie calculator give at least 1800-2000 kcal for your activity and BW to maintain it. You eat in deficit all the time. It’s almost impossible to gain muscle in deficit without roids. Try this :
Health-calc - Energy expenditure adv.
As you want to compete in 43 kg weight class, i think you should gain at least 5 kg and stay about 45-46+kg off sesson to maintain enough strenght and muscle mass to have competitive results.
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You should expect to hit the 100% set. The 105% set is something to strive for, not something to just put on the bar and try if it doesn’t feel right. Work up to the 100% set, see how it feels. If you have it in you, try 102.5%, again assess and only then if you still feel strong try 105%. I’ve only ever once hit a 105% set on a prescribed day, but I often get small PR’s on those days. That seems to be the typical outcome.
@chris_ottawa is absolutely right here. Cut your conditioning leading up to the 1rm test. It will absolutely hurt your performance. You need to, and want to, go in extra fresh.
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This will be a good excuse not to work out on Saturday then (I’m flying back to Pittsburgh)
You absolutely should not workout the day before your 105’s. You also absolutely should not add conditioning to the workouts during the week leading up to it. Do the prescribed sets, not more.
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Nah is Gains
This seems less like confusion and more like a very clear message. One that’s being echoed by many here.
How do you judge “healthier” if not by labs?
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Tough love time. With the best of intentions, I think the only person confused is you. Friends, family, and most importantly doctors, are telling you that prolonged maintenance of your current bf level is causing damage to your body. The fact that this situation isn’t improving while you continue to maintain the same bodyfat level is not confusing at all. The only confusing thing is why you expected anything else?
When bodybuilders and physique athletes diet down to competition lean, for a last few weeks or months their hormones (as well as other labs) are, like yours, tanked. Men would absolutely qualify for TRT if tested and young women stop menstruating. Getting to that level of lean is provably unhealth and they do it for a short period, a willing sacrifice, and then they try to fix themselves as quickly as possible after the fact.
Most top bb/physique coaches will keep monitoring how long it takes their female athletes to get back to a normal menstrual cycle as a key marker of how well they have recovered after their competition.
Getting lean enough to cause these effects and then insisting on staying there, while using HRT instead of fixing the cause, is going to (continue to) cause you long term problems.
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Week 2: Day 2
Kickboxing lesson- I know I’m not supposed to do conditioning, but I already paid for the class. The coach did go easy on me though- it was still fun and very sweaty 
Tomorrow’s deadlifts are easy though, I’ll be fine
Week 2: Day 3
I was supposed to deadlift today, but my hamstrings were so sore and tight, I could barely get down into position 
Horrible cramping last night…
Back Squat: 1x10-40, 1x8-50, 4x6-60 w/1min rests, 2x4-50 w/3sec descents+3sec pause
Bench: 1x10-30,35, 6x8-40
- squats were a lot easier than expected, especially mentally, bench felt fine, first sets sucked though
Jinx
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The harsh truth is that there is a lot of disconnection between perception and reality going on.
Sorry to be so blunt, but you claim to take no offense to whatever is said, so I will take that at face value.
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I feel great today, so deadlifts are on
I’m not immune to failing to ignore sunk costs The class was very expensive, and the coach is very (almost creepily) nice
Jinx again. Careful now. I’m weird about people telling me big things are coming for my lifts because I injured my back right after that
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