I wonder how much of the apparent contempt you feel for men in general you happen to direct toward yourself, because buddy, something ain’t right here.
[/quote]
The only thing you said worth reading in your babbling bullshit was in the last paragraph. The only thing I hold against myself is the desire for sex which is mostly hormonal and there’s not much I can do about it. Other than that, do you have anything else worth repeating… are you just going to reply with another post of babbling bullshit?
I stand by what I said. The woman was under some dire mental stress. That doesn’t mean Derek did something wrong. It just means that given the circumstances, anyone should have compassion for her situation, just as SHE should have compassion for the client’s situation.
Just a couple of things:
To say “Have some compassion for her situation” is fair enough. However more than one poster on this thread has specifically said “She shouldn’t be held accountable for her actions”. That ISN’T the same thing. The first statement is reasonable. It’s the second statement that a lot of the guys on here seem to take issue with, because it’s complete and utter bullshit.
It appears (at least from what the original poster said) that she DID’T have compassion for the client’s situation. It also seems like she doesn’t admit she did anything wrong (forgive me if I’m wrong on this: the thread is getting long and I’ve skimmed over some responses). I’m not surprised he’s pissed off: why should he be the first one to move when he’s clearly in the right? Giving way first when you’re right isn’t ‘being big’ or ‘being compassionate’, it’s inviting the other party to make you into a fucking doormat.
I’ll take this one!
Who’s right? Who’s wrong? Who gives a shit? What’s he supposed to do now to keep this from happening again? There’s the important question. If you want to assign blame, then blame me motherfucker! It’s not going to matter none.
Is there some kind or rulebook that was passed out for assigning blame to relationship problems, because I didn’t read that one? I read the book on prevention and solution.
Do you see this pattern ladies? MEN love to be right, the best way to do that is to assign blame. If they’re not to blame, then they must be right, right? Hogwash! I’d rather be wrong and remedy the situation, than be right and only perpetuate another outburst.
Accountability: Whose responsible? Both of them because they are in a relationship, which if I’m not mistaken takes two to tango. One end of the relationship needs to learn to trust and feel more secure. The other end needs to provide the feeling of security and trust. Since they cancel each other out, there is no point in assigning blame and holding anyone accountable.
It’s a mutual problem with a mutual solution. Both sides must take responsibility. Therefore, anyone wanting to assign blame to a side is just talking out of their ass!
[/quote]
Was this not enough for you? Would you like another lesson? It will have to be some other time… the lady is calling.
Was this not enough for you? Would you like another lesson?
[/quote]
Dude I want all the ‘lessons’ you can give me. I’m in need of enlightenment and I want you to preach at me like you were on Oprah and I was your TV audience!
Oh, and since you requested it, I’ve also brought you some babbling bullshit fresh from the forum oven!
followed by:
[quote]
The only thing I hold against myself is the desire for sex[/quote]
Wait a second… ahhh shit. That was you wasn’t it? Never mind, I’ll leave you to go attend to your lady, but I hope you won’t forget about us poor guys in need of your special brand of wisdom tomorrow.
[quote]BarneyFife wrote:
Congrats. Your wife loves you, and wants to keep you. She shouldn’t have exploded on you, and it was good of you to call your wife and explain. No advice, but just a congratulations that you have a loving woman.[/quote]
Loving? He’s married to an pathologically insecure wench who wants to enslave him. Congrats, indeed.
[quote]Nominal Prospect wrote:
BarneyFife wrote:
Congrats. Your wife loves you, and wants to keep you. She shouldn’t have exploded on you, and it was good of you to call your wife and explain. No advice, but just a congratulations that you have a loving woman.
Loving? He’s married to an pathologically insecure wench who wants to enslave him. Congrats, indeed.[/quote]
Maybe that’s what he is into. There are some kinky people out there.
[quote]Nominal Prospect wrote:
BarneyFife wrote:
Congrats. Your wife loves you, and wants to keep you. She shouldn’t have exploded on you, and it was good of you to call your wife and explain. No advice, but just a congratulations that you have a loving woman.
Loving? He’s married to an pathologically insecure wench who wants to enslave him. Congrats, indeed.[/quote]
That wasn’t very nice!
She’s actually a sweet little thing that gives me as much freedom as I need. There are a few times here and there that I must question her response to a given situation. That’s all.
If you look back, you’ll see where I wrote that I’m a happy family man. All I originally asked was if I was right in what I did or not. The threads been all over the place ever since thanks to GHF and his lunatic rantings.
so it’s not about defending their honor, it’s about keeping them fake happy so you can blow seed. Why didn’t you say that to begin with.
Who said anything about defending an honor? And I did say that to begin with. “I’ll be fucking my wife”, do you not read my posts? I have many a posts with references to needing my wife for sex. I am open and honest about that. The only fake thing I see is you are afraid to be yourself and it takes someone like me to bring it out of you. You’re pathetic.
Keep your posts comming, they’re getting better. Another thing, don’t ever say anything about my wife unless you’d like to say to my face. (refering to your post before its deleted)
You know where I Lift. If you have something to say about my wife, you come to Gold’s Gym in Talahassee Florida and say it to me personally. I’m off to bed. Think about that for a minute… who’s the fake?[/quote]
It took a mod to point out my ‘comment’ You’re so stupid and tied up in yourself and your rant you just washed right over it. Real defender of honor. You won’t even stand up for your wife. But you keep right on pretending to be the big protector of all that is vaginal.
Hey Mr. PhoneyBaloney I don’t give much of anything you say a thought. I just keep on pushing your lying buttons and you keep on lobbing me softballs.
I will say one thing. Your interpretations of your posts are almost as amusing as your ramblings themselves. You’ve taken both sides of just about every topic on this thread.
And yet, I get the sense you think you have truly orated a good debate here.
Oh well, my work here is done. I can’t make you look any dumber than you’ve done yourself.
I wonder how much of the apparent contempt you feel for men in general you happen to direct toward yourself, because buddy, something ain’t right here.
The only thing you said worth reading in your babbling bullshit was in the last paragraph. The only thing I hold against myself is the desire for sex which is mostly hormonal and there’s not much I can do about it. Other than that, do you have anything else worth repeating… are you just going to reply with another post of babbling bullshit?[/quote]
Glad to know sex with your wife is simply your hormonal urges. Wouldn’t want you to write any more ‘chick porn’ about love, intimacy, feelings, and caring , and relationship mentoring…blah…blah…blah.
i signed up a few days ago and i wasn’t really going to post but i couldn’t help meself
im going to have to kick your ass becasue youre turning my girlfriend on
we were reading this post because it was so entertaning and we couldnt believe there was only one brain fending off all these people
how does one person shoot down that many people and have an answer for everything
my girlfriend said you have a cowboy issue
meaning that youre hard as hell on the outside and soft as a baby on the inside
how do i get something like that and stand up to people the way you do
im kind of a pushover but i have friends that usually stick up for me
i would like you to pm me and tell me how you do that
by the way my girlfriend said you know more about women than all the others and can you help me with some stuff
thanks pedro[/quote]
It’s not hard Pedro, most of these guys are self destructive just trying to toot their own horn. They don’t even believe half the shit they type. This is why they are so easy to defeat. Tell your girlfriend its called a “Cowboy Complex” not a “Cowboy Issue”, and she was right on the money.
[quote]derek wrote:
Is it possible that GHF’s wife is telling him what to write?
It makes sense when you think about it.
OK, gotta go back to work. Thanks guys and girls for all the advice (keep it coming).[/quote]
No Derek, if it was up to my wife, I wouldn’t type anything when I’m home. I’m already breaking “her” rules. I’m actually not going to be as much fun to play “internet babble battle” anymore. I like some others in here, will put their wife first. My wife would just type “Fuck You” and let it be over with. I like to open up their wounds and watch em’ squirm.
[quote]Go heavy fool wrote:
No matter how bad women piss you off, you bite your fuckin’ tongue. [/quote]
That’s the exact opposite of how I want to be “handled.” I’d have no respect for my husband if he wasn’t clear and direct with me and didn’t tell me what was on his mind for the sake of making peace. How does constantly biting your tongue help a relationship in the long run? Are women so ______ that they can’t accept honesty?
Derek, your wife may have insecurities/jealousies brewing that have nothing to do with you or your actions, and if that’s the case, you could continue to beat your head against the wall for years and never win. I imagine you’ve already been upfront with her - outside of the heat of an argument - about the specific ways her ongoing distrust is affecting you.
Maybe it’d be helpful to sit down with a friend, counselor or some other third party who can put things into perspective and allow her to take ownership of her part in this. Sometimes it’s easier to hear logic from anyone but your spouse.
If this was a rare incident, you could probably chalk up her misguided reaction to a bad set of circumstances, but it sounds like it’s an ongoing issue that needs resolution. For both of you.
For the record, I think men, women, boys and girls should always be held accountable for their actions. If she’s in a bad place in her life (understandable with young kids, high stress), then maybe some changes are in order.
[quote]Nominal Prospect wrote:
BarneyFife wrote:
Congrats. Your wife loves you, and wants to keep you. She shouldn’t have exploded on you, and it was good of you to call your wife and explain. No advice, but just a congratulations that you have a loving woman.
Loving? He’s married to an pathologically insecure wench who wants to enslave him. Congrats, indeed.[/quote]
Based on the knowledge of women that you have displayed on this site that just reaffirms that Barney is right.
Derek’s wife loves him and does not want to lose him. She is a bit jealous because he is in a career that he could easily cheat on her. She is a bit insecure.
I belive you are on to something there, as are some of the guys posts (the ones that were NOT calling my wife a wench, bitch etc.).
It would be nice to have a third party involved. Otherwise it’s just pointless debate with no resolution.
Something I want to add here is my profession may play a role here. I own my own private studio and have a few attractive women come to train 6 out of 7 days per week.
That can’t be easy I suppose even though things are on the up and up.
I know it’s not my DIRECT actions that are to blame but short of finding a new career, I cannot seem to do anything about it.
[quote]SBB wrote:
Go heavy fool wrote:
No matter how bad women piss you off, you bite your fuckin’ tongue.
That’s the exact opposite of how I want to be “handled.” I’d have no respect for my husband if he wasn’t clear and direct with me and didn’t tell me what was on his mind for the sake of making peace. How does constantly biting your tongue help a relationship in the long run? Are women so ______ that they can’t accept honesty?
[/quote]
My wife would have no respect for me either, if I never said anything to her. My point was that you never insult your wife or talk down to them. I’m the most straight foward type of person you’ll ever find, but I bite my fuckin’ tongue before I’ll ever insult my wife. Women have better retention than elephants, they’ll take those insults to the grave with them. From my experience, it’s better to resolve the issue another way. I can usually do it with a stern look or and words at all… no need to insult anyone. I can accomplish my point without ever having to actually say it.
“Are women so ______ that they can’t accept honesty?”
Does a woman want to know that she looks like dogshit today? Does she need that honesty? I think not. I think you bite your fuckin’ tongue when need be. Some things are best left unsaid. Does she need to know that she’s a bitch? Yes! There are ways of letting her know that without actually calling her one. Whenever you want to be called a “bitch” and feel good about yourself for it, let me know. It will be the first I’ve heard. My wife in particular, does not like to be insulted in any way. Instead I tell her about all the things that make her great, and that tends to make her want to act that way. I don’t tell her everything that is wrong with her so she can feel worse about herself. I hope I answered your questions and you understand what I meant, because I understood what you trying to say and I agree with you.
