Snack:
2 eggs
1 string cheese
1/2 cup rolled oats
1 apple (THE BEST IVE EVER HAD)
----Total: 488 Kcal, 18g fat, 44g carbs, 26g protein
Dinner:
3 slices pizza
4 oz ground turkey
1 cup milk
1 cup Greek yogurt
1 tbsp peanut butter
1 tsp honey
----Total: 1358 Kcal, 61g fat, 99g carbs, 98g protein
Days total: 3478 Kcal, 146g fat, 298g carbs, 217g protein
Good eating I suppose
Tomorrowās workout
OHP:
5 sets of 85lbs x 6 reps
Deadlift:
5 sets of 225lbs x 6 reps
Dips:
4 sets of +10lbs x 10 reps
BB curl
4 sets of 65lbs x 10 reps
DB lunges
4 sets of 45lbers x 10 reps each leg
Hopefully I can do the lower body exercisesā¦ ankle and knee have been cranky. Back is feeling fine though.
Im 58.Ģ 3% done with Mass protocolā¦ wow.
What is life? Is it to live, Or to be alive? Is it the journey unto death, that cold and icy embrace at the end of this race? Wherefore we then shall be born once more into our Life in God (if not in Hell that is)? Is death not to go into life? And so is life a preparation for Life? and If we prepare now for life, and not Life, we shall die. But if we prepare for death, and so Life, we shall Live.
So what is death, other than Life antecedent? Death, as in, to live no more? And so to live no more, is to be in Life? Therefore, is there no death? But there is death, there is Death, but not death, which is unto Life.
Therefore, Live, and die, lest you live, and go into Death.
Jan 12 2025: W8D1
Emotional talk
I feel generally depressed today. I feel like my sin is too much to be forgiven. But I know it isnt, Christ is greater than all sin. I just feel so melancholy.
I just want to be alone and lay in bed all day, away from everyone. But I canāt.
I just need to push forward. Life moves on, and time slows down for nobody.
I donāt want to die, for my parents sake and for everyone else. But I feel like if there was nobody, I would want to kill myself. But I donāt. Im such a mess. I want this feeling to stop. I know theres so much to live for. Im justā¦ Tired. Tired of everything. Tired of hurting. Tired of my sinful nature. Tired of being Tired.
ā¦Breakfast in 10 minutes
Start of the second semester for school. First class is electrical engineering. Then after that il have strength. Everything else is the exact same.
You matter dude. Donāt ever think otherwise. Iām here if you need to chat, as are others.
I am the half baked atheist. However, if I remember correctly the Grace of Christ is a blessing you need to remember. Due to Grace you are forgiven of your sins. That is what you believe. Grab onto it and find peace in Christ. Your parents want you here as well. Counseling might be a good thing. IF it would make you feel more comfortable meeting with a Christian counselor, then do so. Maybe the religion of your attendance furnishes that service. Meanwhile, keep working your workouts. My 3 days a week sessions is my mindfulness time. Throw in a few sauna, a good quiet sweat. As T3hPwnisher typed, you do matter. Keep pushing forward.
You matter.
I believe Jesus lived, was an enlightened master, and is an example of how to find heaven on earth. I donāt believe in the Christian (Roman, Pauline) view of Christ as the messiah.
But, I do know that your sins are forgiven already, before they even happen, for Christians because of the crucifixion. You get a pass. Learn from them and move on.
Include physical activity as part of moving on.
I find practicing gratitude to be beneficial. We are all miracles and blessed to have a human experience.
Thanks everyone.
I was feeling a lot better once I was in school, and I feel better now still.
Iām glad to be alive today. I love life. Things are how they are.
Il update with everything in a bit.
Made a new log with all my physique pictures. Figured it would be good for ease of reference
Breakfast:
1 cup cottage cheese
1/2 cup protein granola
1 tsp honey
1 oz golden berries
----Total: 427 Kcal, 11g fat, 45g carbs, 34g protein
Workout:
OHP
45 x 5
65 x 3
75 x 2
85 x 6
85 x 6
85 x 6
85 x 6
85 x 6
These were difficultā¦ Last rep of the last set or two were more of standing incline bench, but, failure wasnāt an option for me.
Deadlift
135 x 5
155 x 3
175 x 3
195 x 2
215 x 2
225 x 6
225 x 6
225 x 6
225 x 6
225 x 6
Dips
+10 x 10
+10 x 10
+10 x 10
+10 x 10
BB curl
65 x 10
65 x 10
65 x 6 +1
65 x 4 +1
Good workout.
Lunch:
1 sandwich, ham and cheese
1 juice box
----Total: 459 Kcal, 18g fat, 50g carbs, 25g protein
Snack:
2 chicken patties
2 cheese sticks
1 cup pineapple chunks (not as flavorful as I remember, but still very good. The juice is quite good also)
2 slices bread
3 eggs
1/2 tbsp butter
1 slice ham
4 orange slice candies
----Total: 1179 Kcal, 48g fat, 112g carbs, 64g protein
Dinner
4 oz beef
3/4 cup macaroni
1/3 cup peas
2 tbsp ketchup
----Total: 469 Kcal, 11g fat, 44g carbs, 44g protein
Need 366 Kcal and 46g proteinā¦ sigh. Gonna have to find something good. Greek yogurt would be good. Add some peanut butter and honey. Maybe a bit more fruit, for nutrition. Then maybe a glass of milk. Maybe Il be pretty close then.
I love math. Its so beautiful. I love the function:
f(x)= e^((-x^2)/2)sinx
or to copy into desmos graphing calculatorā¦
f(x)=e^{\frac{-x^{2}}{2}}\sin x
Its so wonderful.
I did my workout split up. I got to do OHP during class, and then I did Deadlift (I DID DEADLIFT! WOOHOO!) BB curl, and weighted dips. I didnāt even attempt lunges, I knew it would mess me up.
I walked on the treadmill backwards after this for a few minutes. Thatās nice. Walking home?, wasnāt fun but I made it!
My friend (he lifts and is very active) gave me some advice on my knee. He recommended doing single leg extension 30 second holds, with my knee right on the edge of the seat, and working my way up in weight as I can. And also āTKEā, Spanish squats, monster walks, and some other stuff I should have noted down. These should be enough for now though.
Good to see you pulling again.
Need 366 Kcal and 46g proteinā¦ sigh. Gonna have to find something good. Greek yogurt would be good. Add some peanut butter and honey. Maybe a bit more fruit, for nutrition. Then maybe a glass of milk. Maybe Il be pretty close then.
I donāt see a whole lot of value to the honey in this equation. Theyāre simple carbs, and youāre already done training for the day. 46g of protein is 184 calories, so youāve already knocked out half of that 366 right there. Adding milk to the greek yogurt makes sense, as would cottage cheese, and then some fruit would work well.
The honey is really more of just for taste, and its healthier than just white sugar. The peanut butter gives it a flavor Im not very fond of, so adding honey helps. I donāt add much really.
Never had the fruit with it, but did have 1.5 cups of milk
Days total: 3020 Kcal, 105g fat, 288g carbs, 215g protein
Today would be a conditioning day, but I donāt have any time so if I probably wont be able to do anything. Oh well.
Im going to do some of the exercises for my knee. A new focus for me is to strengthen my tendons more, in general.
20 minutes until breakfast
Today would be a conditioning day, but I donāt have any time so if I probably wont be able to do anything. Oh well.
You were participating in the martial arts club at some point: do you know how to shadowbox?
No. I mean, I have an idea, just get real mad and start beating up the air for being in your way, haha. Not sure if thereās an actual āwayā though.
Will update soon. Did some knee work this morning, and wore a bandage wrap on my knee. It feels SO much better. Im definitely doing this more often.
Thatās quite the opposite, yeah. Itās basically practice sparring, just with an imaginary opponent. But itās something you can do in the absence of equipment.
Good to hear youāre healing!
Breakfast:
1 cup cottage cheese
1/2 cup protein granola
1 cup milk
1 oz golden berries
----Total: 538 Kcal, 16g fat, 54g carbs, 42g protein
Lunch
1 sandwich ham and cheese
1 juice box
----Total: 453 Kcal, 16g fat, 50g carbs, 26g protein
Dinner
1 pack protein oatmeal
3 pork chops
1/2 cup boiled potato
1/4 cup glazed carrots
3 orange slice candies
----Total: 974 Kcal, 21g fat, 90g carbs, 95g protein
Need 934 Kcal and 50g protein
Soā¦ thereās this girl. I think I like her. I donāt really know what her voice sounds like (she is very quiet), Iāve never talked to her, but I find her attractive. Not in a āhotā way. But attractive as in, she seems respectable. I think shes pretty too. I think this is what people call a ācrushāā¦ I think if I see her at my lunch table I might say something to herā¦
This is the first time I find myself infactuated with a girl. I have this feeling Iāve never felt before, its like a shy nervous (but not anxious) happiness.
Had 2 chicken patties, 1 cup Greek yogurt, 2 tbsp peanut butter, 1 tsp honey, and 2 fruit strips.
Days total:
2902 Kcal, 86g fat, 285g carbs, 227g protein
Good eating today.
Jan 14 2026 W8D3 Bench/Squat/S1
Probably canāt squat today, but I might try.
Need to actually write out my workout:
Bench 160 x 6
Squat: 205 x 6
Pullups: 8 reps
Tricep extension: 60lbs x 10
KB swings (hopefully) 70.2lbs x 30
Time to work on stretching/mobility/tendon strengthening.
Breakfast:
3 eggs
2 slices cheese
1 slice ham
1/4 cup cheese
1 cup milk
----Total: 627 Kcal, 32g fat, 41g carbs, 41g protein
Lunch
1 turkey cheese sandwich
1 juice box
----Total: 561 Kcal, 21g fat, 53g carbs, 38g protein.
Snack (still eating)
1 soft baked oatmeal square
1 hot pocket
currently cooking a bunch of fish to eat. Need protein.
I think I should space out my food more throughout the day. The last two days Iāve had this lightheaded feeling in the afternoon, and I think its from lack of food. Breakfasts havenāt been huge, and lunch is pretty small. I might start bringing something else.
Next time we go to the store Im buying a bunch of meat and stuff. I need meat.
WIll track everything soon
Snack:
1 soft oatmeal square
1 hot pocket
12 oz fish filets
1/2 cup oats
----Total: 941 Kcal, 29g fat, 77g carbs, 83g protein
Need 771 Kcal and 52g protein
Workout: I did squats, but not all of them. Easing my way back.
Bench
95 x 7
115 x 5
135 x 4
160 x 6
160 x 6
160 x 6
160 x 6
160 x 6
My one friend is in my strength class, and he was actually shocked that I could do so much. He said that Iām āan animalā. Lol. I donāt really get it though, its not that much weight? He lifts less (as in, not dedicated), but he isnāt out of shape. He does sports and stuff, and fishes.
Squat
115 x 5
135 x 5
155 x 3
175 x 3
195 x 2
205 x 6
205 x 6
205 x 6
Didnāt do the rest. My knee was hurting super badly, but, I felt it, and although I pushed through 3 sets, I felt it might be better to skip the last two. This meant, however, that I had just enough time to finish the whole workout
Pullups
8
6 1/2 +1/2
~5
~4
Tricep extesion
60 x 10
60 x 10
60 x 10
60 x 1
KB swing
70.2 x 20 (cut it short for time reasons. Plus might as well ease back into it)
70.2 x 20
70.2 x 20
70.2 x 20
Good workout.
Time to get my homework done. Eating an apple as well, for nutrients.
Dinner:
1/2 a tonyās supreme pizza
the toppings from three slices (we were throwing the rest away)
----Total: 916 Kcal, 47g fat, 77g carbs, 43g protein
Uhā¦ I made a bowl of cottage cheese and pineapple before I tracked the toppingsā¦ so Il be over the calorie and the protein. Not an issue! Eating it now.