[quote]Bauber wrote:
[quote]ouroboro_s wrote:
Finally, don’t alter your tits. Get a defcon 4 pushup bra. I’m pretty low bodyfat and have zero boobs so I put a couple of La Senza muppets on my chest.[/quote]
Negative, do not false advertise lol.[/quote]
Fair enough. I’m married so my husband knows exactly what’s under the muppets. I feel sexier though.
[quote]Spock81 wrote:
Well I cannOT STAND having any hair in my girl area, so that parts covered. LOL
[/quote]
Covered with what? Not hair apparently.
Oh and here’s a bit of a back story to explain my life situation a bit:
A few years ago I was living on my own in an apartment while working/going to school.
I did not need to drive because everything was literally a 10 min walk from my house, perfect right?
Well life was pretty awesome, but I was busy every day and almost never saw my kid (he was with my parents when i worked or during school time).
I could see him every free moment, but that all changed once he started going to school.
I worked weekends and evenings and went to school in the evenings and it was starting to really get to me.
Then summer holiday’s came and we spent TONS of time together and I felt so much better, but school was going to be starting up again and I couldn’t do it anymore. I couldn’t have my parents continue to raise my own kid. So I told him he was going to be changing schools and he was going to live with me and not stay at my parents place anymore.
Well needless to say it broke his heart that he had to change schools. He wouldn’t talk to me for days and the guilt was tearing me up inside. I also felt guilty for not being there enough over the years so on like August. 30th I decided to move back in with my parents and now I’m kinda stuck there. I want to find a place to live here, but like I said, it’s crazy expensive. Twice what I would pay for an apartment in edmonton. It’s something that I am working towards, but honestly this is just where I am at right now whether I like it or not.
I still think I’m a good person and deserve to find a man regardless of my shitty life situation.
[quote]Spock81 wrote:
I really do believe it’s ‘me’ and not them that’s the issue though.[/quote]
The grooming issues are beyond my scope of expertise. Men do like women to dress up a bit and that shaped like a woman. Looks are very important to get men to make the first effort. After that, it’s personality, which you have.
I think the bigger issue is you need to go somewhere where there are men. You can’t fish in your bathroom at home.
Synagogue or church (I presume) comes to mind.
A job that is not your current job. Say, a bookstore, hardware store, computer game store, whatever.
Volunteer at something.
Lol So I was kinda intrigued by this thread, after reading her quick bio I knew she had to be ugly…that had to be the answer, after finding a pic of her on the other tread I’ve come to 1 conclusion…
There’s no way in fucking hell she’s real. I’m calling shes another DN created by someone else on this site.
No fucking way
Just
No fucking way
Spock I’m in a similar boat. I’ve given up what I want in order to keep my daughter in a private school where she gets a great education and has solid friendships. So I know your sacrifice, and there’s nothing wrong with that. I don’t think nightclubs and bars are good places to meet a solid stable dude. It will happen if you love yourself and be yourself and keep your eyes open to the possibilities around you - some of them may happen where you’d least expect. I think you are totally rad just the way you are from what I’ve seen and you have a rockin body too. The sexiest thing about a person is confidence and if you can see they love themselves and the people around them.
Pictures can’t determine someone’s attractiveness.
[quote]theBeth wrote:
Pictures can’t determine someone’s attractiveness.[/quote]
Yes, they hella can.
Like it or not, if you put 10 pictures of women up, men will rate them more or less the same.
We iz not wimmenz.
Looks matter quite a bit.
And we do that automatically and lighting fast too.
References:
http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2013/04/01/female-beauty-from-5-to-7/
http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2009/03/27/female-beauty-from-1-to-10-2/
[quote]orion wrote:
http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2013/04/01/female-beauty-from-5-to-7/
http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2009/03/27/female-beauty-from-1-to-10-2/[/quote]
Well, the ‘objectivity’ surprised me a lot there. Outside of the 10 (which I really only see as an 8), everything I said matched very very closely with the stats.
I didn’t realize there was actually that little statistical variance.
As someone who knows Spock in real life (and has for quite some time) this is a fascinating thread.
In other news Spock if you want to learn to drive, and have access to an automatic (it’ll be easier to teach in the winter but I’m happy to teach you stick in the summer, no innuendo there) I’d be happy to teach you. . . given that I am a licensed instructor with Alberta Transportation and all that.
I’m not saying I’m picking you up every evening but I can find some time to help out a bit if you’d like.
FYI it won’t cost you and won’t be “official driver training” so there won’t be an insurance discount with it but I’d be happy to help you out regardless off the books.
Spock - you are a naturally pretty girl. You don’t need to get your boobs done or change your hair color or any of that nonsense. If you want to try a new hairstyle fine, but don’t make drastic color changes. You exercise regularly and intensely, so I suspect that your figure is lovely. Start a wardrobe overhaul. Look for styles and colors that make you look classy and feel sexy. Sexy-confident, NOT “I’m looking to get laid right now slutty”. Let a man see you and know that you are a woman AND a lady.
If you want to attract a man of substance, you need to put yourself in situations where you will meet and interact with those sorts of men. In this case, the gym doesn’t count. Decide what you want in a man and then become the sort of woman that a man like that will find interesting. Expand your horizons. Become involved in charity and volunteer work, politics, religion. There isn’t anything wrong with having an interest in cartoons and video games and comic books, especially as they give you some common ground with your kid, but you are a grown up. Find some women in your community and the world that you admire, define WHY you admire them, and then work to become more like them.
You seem like a smart, sweet girl Spock. I suspect that you haven’t yet begun to discover what an awesome woman is hidden away inside you. But you have to get after life just as you get after a pr in the gym.
Also - get busy and get your driver’s license. Make it a priority. Even if you don’t use it often, you will need it sooner or later and getting it will give you a little boost of self-confidence and a sense of accomplishment.
[quote]Sturat wrote:
As someone who knows Spock in real life (and has for quite some time) this is a fascinating thread.
In other news Spock if you want to learn to drive, and have access to an automatic (it’ll be easier to teach in the winter but I’m happy to teach you stick in the summer, no innuendo there) I’d be happy to teach you. . . given that I am a licensed instructor with Alberta Transportation and all that.
I’m not saying I’m picking you up every evening but I can find some time to help out a bit if you’d like.
FYI it won’t cost you and won’t be “official driver training” so there won’t be an insurance discount with it but I’d be happy to help you out regardless off the books.[/quote]
Oh man. I am certain that teaching my kid to drive took a few years off of my life. I salute you - teaching folks to drive day in and day out I could not do.
Edited to add - Spock - take advantage of this! It will be good for you.
[quote]kineticj wrote:
[quote]Sturat wrote:
As someone who knows Spock in real life (and has for quite some time) this is a fascinating thread.
In other news Spock if you want to learn to drive, and have access to an automatic (it’ll be easier to teach in the winter but I’m happy to teach you stick in the summer, no innuendo there) I’d be happy to teach you. . . given that I am a licensed instructor with Alberta Transportation and all that.
I’m not saying I’m picking you up every evening but I can find some time to help out a bit if you’d like.
FYI it won’t cost you and won’t be “official driver training” so there won’t be an insurance discount with it but I’d be happy to help you out regardless off the books.[/quote]
Oh man. I am certain that teaching my kid to drive took a few years off of my life. I salute you - teaching folks to drive day in and day out I could not do.
Edited to add - Spock - take advantage of this! It will be good for you.[/quote]
I actually teach class 6 (motorcycle) mostly, I’m generally too survival oriented to get in a car with people who don’t know what they’re doing. I’ll make an exception here though.
After seeing the pic, I would have a hard time approaching but would be more than happy to strike up a conversation through incidental contact and take it from there.
Spock, I wonder if you’re just not communicating all that great personality that we see here? Are you pretty shy and quiet IRL? I’ve spent a chunk of my life being shy and withdrawn and once I finally opened up people were surprised that I actually had a sense of humour, a personality and something to say. (Plus I wore baggy jeans, skater shoes and boyish nerdy tops**) Now I won’t shut up, much to everyone’s regret =D But my point is that somehow that personality you have, and a bit of sexuality too, could benefit you if more people got to see it.
**This was semi-deliberate. I didn’t want to attract sexual attention or stand out as a girl in IT, a linux/unix admin and c programmer to boot and have to fight nerd women fear and bias against girls. Now that I’ve established myself and gotten away from teh low level guy nerds I can be female again lol
Spock, first you are definitely good looking and I am sure if you " dress up " you could be smokin’.
Second, the sacrifices you have made for your kid is sexy in its own way. Just reading your replies here I can’t see you being too
Shy to make a move first, just saying.
On another note, read this article:
This, along with Merry Christmas Bob, tend to be two of my go-to motivational articles.
Basically ask yourself why would people want to hang out with you? I know what you’ll say. . . “Because I’m nerdy, because I like to work out, because I’m fun if you give me a chance, because I do my best for my kid”
All of those are bullshit and don’t actually answer the question.
People want to hang out with other people because they feel that they can get something they want from that person whether it be safety, security, love, respect, an audience, entertainment, sex, etc. There’s nothing wrong with this, but it does mean that you need to broadcast to people (men in particular) that you’re willing and able to provide something they want. Most girls default to offering (however untruthfully) sex via they’re dress, their makeup, their flirting etc.
So what you need to do is ask yourself a few questions:
What qualities would the type of guy I want be interested in?
Do I have these qualities?
How do I demonstrate that I have these qualities in my interactions/dress/appearance?
How does someone across the street, the bar, the room, the table know that I have these qualities?
Start at the top and work your way down. I don’t know what you’re like these days but in days past you would run away, or turn red, and flat out refuse to talk to any man who showed any real interest in you. Your self esteem was non-existent and when someone did want to hold a conversation in an area you liked (working out, nerding out etc) you’d basically talk so fast that you’d ejaculate out every piece of knowledge you have without allowing them a chance to talk, let alone really listen.
I’m not in any way trying to be mean about this, quite the opposite I want to help.
Stu
[quote]SkyzykS wrote:
After seeing the pic, I would have a hard time approaching but would be more than happy to strike up a conversation through incidental contact and take it from there.
[/quote]
Unpack that comment a little–why would you have trouble approaching? (outside the gym obviously)
[quote]Aragorn wrote:
[quote]SkyzykS wrote:
After seeing the pic, I would have a hard time approaching but would be more than happy to strike up a conversation through incidental contact and take it from there.
[/quote]
Unpack that comment a little–why would you have trouble approaching? (outside the gym obviously) [/quote]
Even inside the gym. Thats just my M.O. I’ve never done straight up cold approaches. Any women I’ve ever either hooked up or had a relationship with has been more of a warm up scenario (even if it warmed up really quickly), either incidentally or with the specific intention of hooking up with someone.
She is an attractive healthy woman, which starts a cascade of assumptions ala the halo effect. Some would be that she’s smart (she does look smart, no neck tats!), is already taken, has better things to do, wouldn’t be interested, etc. Granted, those are my assumptions, but a lot of people do the something similar at least to the extent that it is a well documented phenomenon.
It should also be noted that my self image isn’t exactly stellar and without a few minutes of conversation to read a response, my assumptions can be faulty.
[quote]Jewbacca wrote:
I think the bigger issue is you need to go somewhere where there are men. You can’t fish in your bathroom at home.
Synagogue or church (I presume) comes to mind.
A job that is not your current job. Say, a bookstore, hardware store, computer game store, whatever.
Volunteer at something.
[/quote]
I generally agree, but if she’s not religious, meeting a guy at church would be a terrible idea. If she is religious, it’s a great idea.
[quote]Spock81 wrote:
[quote]RATTLEHEAD wrote:
I’m not going to blow smoke up your ass.
You are decent enough looking, seem interesting BUT you seem really unambitious in life (different matter in the gym tho).
I’ve read you saying how you are happy living with your parents with your kid and having your dad drive you everywhere…
Thats more so of a turn off in terms of relationships than just looking to get my hole off you though.[/quote]
I am not happy living with my parents I HATE living with my parents. I stay here because my kid wants to live in sherwood park where his school is and the cheapest rent is like 1500 dollars a month, which I cannot afford.
I am also terrified to drive and have no one to teach me how and cannot afford to spend thousands of dollars on driver’s training [/quote]
Yeah A chick approaching 30 that stays at home still and has a kid. Does set off a low level warning. But everyone deserves a chance. Seen your pic. I am going to say you are just you are trying to hard to find a guy.