Weightlifting and Insecure Friends

Off Topic
61

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]Teledin wrote:

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:

[quote]24Animal7 wrote:

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:

[quote]Nards wrote:
Also, may I say I’m surprised how this thread went considering that the OP is new and his second post in this thread is something about him being accused of steroids.

I’m proud of you T-Nation!

(Though I would like to see pics of the OP)[/quote]

lol

Im disappointed.

You all are telling him to fight his friend over a joke? You are telling him he doesnt know who is real friends are over a joke? That is ridiculous.

Any response other than questioning whther or not this dude can actually fight is off. If you can lay someone out you know it and nothing anyone says will shake your confidence. I think OP is afraid of his friend.[/quote]

My post is about how to deal my friends being insecure and making ridiculous claims. Nowhere do I write that I am afraid my friend and I will not my fight my friend. I guess my post is more a rant than anything else. I will have pics to follow
[/quote]

That’s my point. The people who posted in this thread took your little rant eay too seriously.

Our friends say shit about us all the time and would do so whether we lifted or not…that’s how it goes.

[/quote]

Really didn’t think it would be necessary, but to point out the obvious (which I am positive you are aware of) … some of the other posts were targeted at the general notion of ‘negative people’ who bring unnecessary shit to the table at one’s own expense. Not just explicitly about the original post subject.

If you are fine with people like that around ya, cool … more power to you. I personally have better things to do with my very limited free time than listen to unnecessary stuff that just strokes the ego of another person.

(yes I am an uptight asshole) =P[/quote]

Well said. I was speaking about life in general, not just the OP. If you want to excel at anything, wasting your time pleasing people who don’t have your best interests in mind will hold you back. I personally don’t have friends who make jokes like that…because they know I’m serious about this. I guess if you take what you do as a joke, others will too though.[/quote]

no one jokes with you because they dont want to argure over nothing…if you act the way you do in real life as you do on here.

62

[quote]lethaldosage148 wrote:
Well this would be my first post, but I really feel the need to comment on this.

Your buddy is not attacking you because he honestly thinks that he could beat you up. The problem is that your getting bigger and in better shape because your consistently going to the gym (and he is not), and he is realizing this and feeling insecure in light of you. He’s just projecting his feelings of inadequacy. Yeah its annoying, but when you break it down, its actually a compliment to you. Your success is making him feel this way.[/quote]

Nah, it’s his way of crying out to the world that he wants “Surprize Buttsecks”.

63

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
Nevermind…

Y’all are right. Friendships are to lack all emotion

In life. Comedy at the expense of friends and family does not exist.

Smiles are irreslevent

I’m planning plastic surgery as I type this to put a permanent scowl on face

People will know that I’m not to be fucked with on my pursuit to dominate the galzy…

All who smile shall kneel in their own vomit before me

My child will only receive frowny faces in school when she excels…that’s just how we roll

Death to those who oppose, even in jest…condemn them to be be impaled

When they are impaled lay them at my feet so that I can eat them to fuel my fires so that I may carry on my battle against the opponent…

Only RAMPAGE

AHHHHHHHHHHHH
[/quote]

LOL. Dude, some of us do take this seriously. That is like being ok with guys making fun of the kid who actually gets good grades. Yeah, people do it. The problem is, usually those laughing do so because they aren’t good at school…and actually would rather bring that other guy down because it makes them feel better. It may not matter to you…but your point of view would be easier to understand if the rest of us saw “proof of success” on your part that would denote you even understand where we are coming from.

Get it?

64

[quote]SteelyD wrote:

[quote]lethaldosage148 wrote:
Well this would be my first post, but I really feel the need to comment on this.

Your buddy is not attacking you because he honestly thinks that he could beat you up. The problem is that your getting bigger and in better shape because your consistently going to the gym (and he is not), and he is realizing this and feeling insecure in light of you. He’s just projecting his feelings of inadequacy. Yeah its annoying, but when you break it down, its actually a compliment to you. Your success is making him feel this way.[/quote]

Nah, it’s his way of crying out to the world that he wants “Surprize Buttsecks”.[/quote]

Ha, or that

65

If your 18 ish just have a non homo ‘funfight’ sometime and dominate on him.

Or rape him

66

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
Nevermind…

Y’all are right. Friendships are to lack all emotion

In life. Comedy at the expense of friends and family does not exist.

Smiles are irreslevent

I’m planning plastic surgery as I type this to put a permanent scowl on face

People will know that I’m not to be fucked with on my pursuit to dominate the galzy…

All who smile shall kneel in their own vomit before me

My child will only receive frowny faces in school when she excels…that’s just how we roll

Death to those who oppose, even in jest…condemn them to be be impaled

When they are impaled lay them at my feet so that I can eat them to fuel my fires so that I may carry on my battle against the opponent…

Only RAMPAGE

AHHHHHHHHHHHH
[/quote]

I’m with Count Chocula on this one me and my few close friends bag on each other all the fucking time. Some of the shit we say would probably even seem down right cruel to some people.

Yet the other day we honestly asked each other in between taking pot shots if anything we ever said to each other has left any emotional scarring or general butt hurting. The answer was no on both sides. It’s like an unspoken rule that anything we say is in jest and never in anger or bitterness. We have been friends for going on 6 years and have never had a fallout of any sort.

On the other hand i wouldn’t banter like this with all my friends especially ones I’m not that close with or that i know are sensitive to that sort of thing. After all I’m not out to tear anyone down and make them feel like shit. You just got to know who it’s appropriate to talk to like that. Some people have thick skin and others don’t.

Anyway OP the fact that you felt the need to make this thread means you probably aren’t one of those thick skinned people like me and Count Chocula over here. Which is fine, you can just tell your friend that he has hurt your feeling and in retaliation he will either apologize or laugh and call you a bitch…but probably the latter.

67

[quote]Matthaeus wrote:

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
Nevermind…

Y’all are right. Friendships are to lack all emotion

In life. Comedy at the expense of friends and family does not exist.

Smiles are irreslevent

I’m planning plastic surgery as I type this to put a permanent scowl on face

People will know that I’m not to be fucked with on my pursuit to dominate the galzy…

All who smile shall kneel in their own vomit before me

My child will only receive frowny faces in school when she excels…that’s just how we roll

Death to those who oppose, even in jest…condemn them to be be impaled

When they are impaled lay them at my feet so that I can eat them to fuel my fires so that I may carry on my battle against the opponent…

Only RAMPAGE

AHHHHHHHHHHHH
[/quote]

I’m with Count Chocula on this one me and my few close friends bag on each other all the fucking time. Some of the shit we say would probably even seem down right cruel to some people.

Yet the other day we honestly asked each other in between taking pot shots if anything we ever said to each other has left any emotional scarring or general butt hurting. The answer was no on both sides. It’s like an unspoken rule that anything we say is in jest and never in anger or bitterness. We have been friends for going on 6 years and have never had a fallout of any sort.

On the other hand i wouldn’t banter like this with all my friends especially ones I’m not that close with or that i know are sensitive to that sort of thing. After all I’m not out to tear anyone down and make them feel like shit. You just got to know who it’s appropriate to talk to like that. Some people have thick skin and others don’t.

Anyway OP the fact that you felt the need to make this thread means you probably aren’t one of those thick skinned people like me and Count Chocula over here. Which is fine, you can just tell your friend that he has hurt your feeling and in retaliation he will either apologize or laugh and call you a bitch…but probably the latter.[/quote]

Wait a minute…you nad Professor X actually understood what Rockula was saying?!?

I gave up after three “sentences.”

68

[quote]Nards wrote:

[quote]Matthaeus wrote:

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
Nevermind…

Y’all are right. Friendships are to lack all emotion

In life. Comedy at the expense of friends and family does not exist.

Smiles are irreslevent

I’m planning plastic surgery as I type this to put a permanent scowl on face

People will know that I’m not to be fucked with on my pursuit to dominate the galzy…

All who smile shall kneel in their own vomit before me

My child will only receive frowny faces in school when she excels…that’s just how we roll

Death to those who oppose, even in jest…condemn them to be be impaled

When they are impaled lay them at my feet so that I can eat them to fuel my fires so that I may carry on my battle against the opponent…

Only RAMPAGE

AHHHHHHHHHHHH
[/quote]

I’m with Count Chocula on this one me and my few close friends bag on each other all the fucking time. Some of the shit we say would probably even seem down right cruel to some people.

Yet the other day we honestly asked each other in between taking pot shots if anything we ever said to each other has left any emotional scarring or general butt hurting. The answer was no on both sides. It’s like an unspoken rule that anything we say is in jest and never in anger or bitterness. We have been friends for going on 6 years and have never had a fallout of any sort.

On the other hand i wouldn’t banter like this with all my friends especially ones I’m not that close with or that i know are sensitive to that sort of thing. After all I’m not out to tear anyone down and make them feel like shit. You just got to know who it’s appropriate to talk to like that. Some people have thick skin and others don’t.

Anyway OP the fact that you felt the need to make this thread means you probably aren’t one of those thick skinned people like me and Count Chocula over here. Which is fine, you can just tell your friend that he has hurt your feeling and in retaliation he will either apologize or laugh and call you a bitch…but probably the latter.[/quote]

Wait a minute…you nad Professor X actually understood what Rockula was saying?!?

I gave up after three “sentences.”[/quote]

Game recognizes game Nards.

69

Not for nothin’ this is a problem I had with a good friend of mine for a while. We both started training at the same time but after a couple of months he stopped while I kept on. Fast forward almost 2 years, he is the definition of skinny fat. When I see his family they spend the majority of time complimenting me and keep saying how their son should “follow suit” or if I had some time to “drag him to the gym with you”

Of course when its just me and him one on one (for example when I was trying to buy some lifting shoes) I explained to the store associate I needed some footwear to lift in. Mr. Skinny-fat says something like “oh you work out?”

Another time I could think of is when I met his gf for the first time she complimented my back and arms. Mr. Skinny-Fat told her I was just “pushing my fat up” and that I wasn’t really muscular. She gave him a look like “what do you think I am? Retarded?”

I ceased communication with him after we last spoke I told him how my wrestling was going. He made some lame comment like “oh, I didn’t know you kept it with it… I wish I did back when we started together.”

Just don’t need people like that in life. Besides, the skinny-fat look is fucking horrible, especially when the person afflicted with it is clueless about how they look.

70

The more i train and get into this lifestyle, the more distanced i get from my friends.

I mean, i really enjoy being at their side and laughing, but I simply don’t stand going to nightclubs and getting wasted and using drugs anymore, i have bigger goals in life and it’s a shame i can’t share those moments with them. Although i would be lying to myself if i said that i would better spend my time with them instead of training all day long.

I cut off friendship with the most distant/drug-abusers ones, i just noticed, that i didn’t care for they friendship, the lifestyle didn’t match anymore, sometimes they would offend me because of being so focused on training, fuck. There are 6 billions of people around the world, I’m pretty sure i just need to find friends who share the same goals and camaraderie to spend my time with.

71

LOOOL way to look at the extremes. It isn’t that people like me don’t joke around. I do it all the time too with friends and strangers. It is just bullshit annoying when one person CONSTANTLY rips on you for the same thing and never has anything positive to say on the matter. It can become a ‘notsureifsrs’ situation, especially when they are directly ripping on your for something you are succeeding in which plays a big role in your life. If there is no balance, then it’s just negativity. By far an large, it is more of a thing you decide on face to face level. You just know what a person really means by their expression, the tone in their voice, their body language, etc.

I.e. people at work call me the office gorilla and say the boss pays me in steroids. I’m cool with that because they also recognise my contribution to the team and I can read into it via direct communication.

You just know when someone is being a dick, as opposed to a joker.

72

[quote]Teledin wrote:

You just know when someone is being a dick, as opposed to a joker.[/quote]

sometimes people don’t, i have a friend who whenever i see him i just say shit about him because i like to see him getting pissed and showing how much he brags about having changed but still cares a lot about people opinion, till one day he snapped. Then i learned that some people don’t have that joker/dick detector and he was truly mad at me.

73

All of my friends universally accuse of me of steroid use… And that shit is getting really old. I’m not saying I frown upon people who us it, but the matter of fact is that I am not all that big, I just enjoy being healthy. If they got their lazy asses off the couch/put down their PBR…

Eh, come at me bro.

74

I find it amazing that all these sub 200 lb guys are being accused of steroid usage . At 5’7" 205+ people don’t comment on my size or scream roidzzzz . Of course I lift in my own place, own my own business , and find the average person is more interested in my wife and kids than any training method, steroid use, or the latest whiz bang supplement.

It’s the difference between knowing something and owning something . When you’re self assured no one gives a shut about trivia such as biceps size. On both sides .

75

[quote]tom63 wrote:
I find it amazing that all these sub 200 lb guys are being accused of steroid usage . At 5’7" 205+ people don’t comment on my size or scream roidzzzz . Of course I lift in my own place, own my own business , and find the average person is more interested in my wife and kids than any training method, steroid use, or the latest whiz bang supplement.

It’s the difference between knowing something and owning something . When you’re self assured no one gives a shut about trivia such as biceps size. On both sides .[/quote]

My size is the first thing people tend to notice…and yeah, how I’m dressed has much to do with it also. I am at the point where wearing a tank top to the store after training is guaranteed to get whispers and people pointing. It isn’t that noticeable when in a full shirt but I still get some comments.

I agree though, if you are sitting under 220lbs, most of that is just talk and I seriously doubt most people really think you are on steroids. If you are a teenager, “teenage speak” doesn’t count. Everyone is retarded at that age.

It is a matter of degrees. Yeah, the really big guys here get it constantly…and it would seem a lot of smaller guys wish they got it more.

Just to throw it out there…but if you are average height and over 230lbs relatively lean (no gut at all and chest bigger than your stomach), chances are, few people see someone your size casually walking around outside of sports. Much bigger than that equals “freak” to most people.

This is NOT for people walking around at 6’1" and taller.

76

[quote]Matthaeus wrote:
Game recognizes game Nards.[/quote]

recognize

[quote]tom63 wrote:
It’s the difference between knowing something and owning something . When you’re self assured no one gives a shut about trivia such as biceps size. On both sides .[/quote]

well said

77

[quote]kaisermetal wrote:

[quote]Teledin wrote:

You just know when someone is being a dick, as opposed to a joker.[/quote]

sometimes people don’t, i have a friend who whenever i see him i just say shit about him because i like to see him getting pissed and showing how much he brags about having changed but still cares a lot about people opinion, till one day he snapped. Then i learned that some people don’t have that joker/dick detector and he was truly mad at me.[/quote]

Granted.

I do think it is A LOT easier to tell the difference between a joker in person versus a joker over a communication medium (phone/internet) just because you can see their body language. Like you pointed out, being able to read body language is another story which generally you learn as you grow up. Your friend probably just hasn’t learned it yet. I sort of do the same with a few of my mates because I know I can get under their skin more than they can get under mine. Tit for tat situation.

78

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]tom63 wrote:
I find it amazing that all these sub 200 lb guys are being accused of steroid usage . At 5’7" 205+ people don’t comment on my size or scream roidzzzz . Of course I lift in my own place, own my own business , and find the average person is more interested in my wife and kids than any training method, steroid use, or the latest whiz bang supplement.

It’s the difference between knowing something and owning something . When you’re self assured no one gives a shut about trivia such as biceps size. On both sides .[/quote]

My size is the first thing people tend to notice…and yeah, how I’m dressed has much to do with it also. I am at the point where wearing a tank top to the store after training is guaranteed to get whispers and people pointing. It isn’t that noticeable when in a full shirt but I still get some comments.

I agree though, if you are sitting under 220lbs, most of that is just talk and I seriously doubt most people really think you are on steroids. If you are a teenager, “teenage speak” doesn’t count. Everyone is retarded at that age.

It is a matter of degrees. Yeah, the really big guys here get it constantly…and it would seem a lot of smaller guys wish they got it more.

Just to throw it out there…but if you are average height and over 230lbs relatively lean (no gut at all and chest bigger than your stomach), chances are, few people see someone your size casually walking around outside of sports. Much bigger than that equals “freak” to most people.

This is NOT for people walking around at 6’1" and taller.[/quote]

Agree with this!

79

I think it’s an age thing. My average attorney patient or teacher patient knows what I do and are only mildly interested . I have a friend who does biathlon races. I’ll ask him about his races etc and he asks me how the workouts are going. Then it’s kids, economy and other middle age things. I’ve have some people comment on my size but just something very mild. It’s like I don’t care and they don’t care. But I’m sure with s big guy like you it’s the initial wow thing and then people deal with you on a professional basis or friend / aquaitance basis.

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]tom63 wrote:
I find it amazing that all these sub 200 lb guys are being accused of steroid usage . At 5’7" 205+ people don’t comment on my size or scream roidzzzz . Of course I lift in my own place, own my own business , and find the average person is more interested in my wife and kids than any training method, steroid use, or the latest whiz bang supplement.

It’s the difference between knowing something and owning something . When you’re self assured no one gives a shut about trivia such as biceps size. On both sides .[/quote]

My size is the first thing people tend to notice…and yeah, how I’m dressed has much to do with it also. I am at the point where wearing a tank top to the store after training is guaranteed to get whispers and people pointing. It isn’t that noticeable when in a full shirt but I still get some comments.

I agree though, if you are sitting under 220lbs, most of that is just talk and I seriously doubt most people really think you are on steroids. If you are a teenager, “teenage speak” doesn’t count. Everyone is retarded at that age.

It is a matter of degrees. Yeah, the really big guys here get it constantly…and it would seem a lot of smaller guys wish they got it more.

Just to throw it out there…but if you are average height and over 230lbs relatively lean (no gut at all and chest bigger than your stomach), chances are, few people see someone your size casually walking around outside of sports. Much bigger than that equals “freak” to most people.

This is NOT for people walking around at 6’1" and taller.[/quote]

80

[quote]24Animal7 wrote:
So I am an avid gym goer. I’ve been hitting the iron for 6 years in November, ever since i was 15. My friends are in and out of exercising. They usually exercise more when we’re all home from school, such as the summer time. I outweigh one of my buddy’s by 60 lbs of muscle and he struggles to bench 150 for reps, doesn’t do anything else, just “benchin and curlin”. But yet he keeps on insisting he could beat me up in a fight haha.

We’re just playing but he always saying things like, “I could take you down, I need to workout today, I havent worked out in a few days, your not so tough” etc. I usually just laugh and go about my business but it gets annoying. Any of your buddies ever give you shit like this and what do you do about it? [/quote]

Men take the piss out of each other. Get over yourself, find a sense of humour and stop worrying