What’s she doing, if you don’t mind me asking? Understand if you don’t wanna talk about it.
Fucking guys and making sure to tell me how good they are and big. Being as mean as she can be, as hurtful as she can be. Telling my kids I don’t care about them, that it’s my fault. Making seeing them difficult Just a bunch of little stuff that probably looks like nothing from the outside but to me is like death.
Is she texting you all this stuff? Do you have a lawyer right now?
And it doesn’t look like nothing. None of that does. It looks horrible and I’m sorry for what you’re going through.
Eyes on the prize though. The prize is liberation from this nightmare, and a healthy relationship with your children.
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So I have let some INSANELY incriminating/damming texts get deleted. BUT I have started to screen shot some stuff now.
I’m going to try and meet with one today. The plan was to do this ourselves and save money. Fuck that. I’m getting one lol
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The lawyer isn’t only to win you things, it’s to have someone with no emotional investment mediate things in a courtroom. Trust me, I have several friends with divorces and judges want no part of he said/she said bullshit in court, or people just yelling and screaming.
I know this is terrible but you HAVE to control what you say to her and document everything.
OKAY, that’s stepping out of line! My mom, in her frustration, has echoed this sentiment towards my dad, but never explicitely in from of us. (they were going through a very rough patch)
My brother and I understood and didn’t take it at face value. I’m sure your kids are mature and will understand. Maybe some 1 on 1 time might help?
I talked about that with a guy at work. There is literally zero chance she can even almost act like a normal person in court. Judge is going to eat her alive.
I don’t want to “get things”. I gave her everything basically. I just don’t want to get raped on child support and don’t want strange thugs around my kids. Also walked them to the door last night. Her apartment WREAKED of marijuana.
5/8, so pretty young. I told them last night that I loved them and stuff and that if mommy tells them bad things about me to not listen. 5 minutes after dropping them off I get a text demanding why I would tell the kids they don’t have to listen to her.
That is something to document, dude. You don’t want them going in a place where someone’s smoking weed inside.
Idk how to document that.
I think you should try to keep kicking ass and trust your kids. They’re perceptive and will notice immediately if what they’re being told doesn’t match up with what they see.
I don’t know anything about your wife, but I’d refrain from even implying she’s struggling with mental health. NOTHING got my mom more worked up than when My dad (rightfully so) brought up mental health
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Oh she’s got issues. Real ones. On a few meds.
I have no kids. I cant advise on that. But consult a lawyer regarding the divorce and hire one. Start screening stuff.
Regarding the marijuana. Call the police that you can smell someone smoking marijuana and give them the address. They will have to check and document it. May be useful later.
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Wish I’d have thought of that last night. It WREAKED. She was so worried about when I’d be bringing the kids back. She told me she had a guy coming over, I just thought it was that
even so, I’d refrain from telling your kids or even mentioning that their mom “ might have problems “- they’ll see for themselves very fast
Yep, unfortunately it’d require law enforcement. If she’s not smart enough to at least smoke outside of the place where the kids will be staying, I don’t see it as a safe place for the kids.
And don’t say anything about not listening to your wife, tell your kids that “no matter what, I love you, and everything will be okay”. That’s all you can say.
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I’ve had friends going through what you are, some didn’t handle it well an acted on their partners level. They regretted it later. Stay strong, don’t get drawn into documented text or email arguments. Keep being the better person.
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I’m most definitely being a better person than her. But unfortunately I have been sucked in a time or two. This stuff is hard lol
Got an appointment with a lawyer at 3:30 today.
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Lawyer appointment went good. Paid some money, for the ball rolling. Didn’t even make it out of the office before the wife could smell something and demanded more money 