Econ study buddy
I wasn’t ever considering gym buddy.
I’m just tallying up the count here.
Gym buddy is out.
Econ buddy out.
Math buddy- ?
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has a gf
So you’re 0 for 3 on using people.
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Well, I don’t need to be in a relationship with any of them to get what I want.
Also the constraints have the benefit of keeping me to my objective
It’s a relationship.
Not an sex based relationship, but a relationship none the less.
My ex girlfriend, the one I almost married, we still have a relationship. I see her around and we talk about life stuff. That’s how I know she’s becoming a nurse and she knows stuff about me.
It’s not what it was. It is what it is though.
Edited to change description of relationship
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Maybe Eleutheria?
I don’t know, but if anyone else does, could you point me in the right direction? Because that sounds pretty interesting.
Dude, no.
Like I said at the time, some people just don’t work together. No blame, no moral judgements.
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On the flip side of the coin it is important to recognize not only our triumphs but our failures so we can learn from them.
Not saying @aldebaran did anything wrong at all, just saying we are all human and screw up sometimes. Learning from those is like Chinese take out. So fucking yummy
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It’s more that I just wasn’t right with myself, and in my head. I would have stopped things earlier and prevented many pain, if I knew how to care and act for me and what I want.
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How else is this generation going to afford them with the surge in property prices lol? I don’t even know how average people in Shenzhen can afford apartments anymore. The price I paid for one 10 years ago as an investment has gone up around 10 times and one in a 2nd tier city like Nanchang has gone up by around 5x while incomes aren’t keeping up. And this is still nothing compared to (in terms of prices, not PPP) 1st World Chinese dominated countries like HK and SG. A fucking 5 room, 1,200sq ft, 99-year leasehold GOVERNMENT apartment in SG can cost up to 1 million USD at resale value now LMAO. Do the math per sq ft. PRIVATE apartments cost almost double. Landed property? A tiny terrace house in suburban areas like the one in The Conjuring 2 will cost at least 2 million USD now. Median salaries are still lower than the US. HK prices are fucking crazier and I don’t think many will believe me if I bring them up unless I post actual links to the official stats but I’m too lazy to google them.
EDIT:
And if anyone thinks I’m making up even the stuff I wrote above, I’m actually downplaying or not mentioning certain stuff.
Reality is even more absurd:
“Last year, police in the Zhejiang province in eastern China, arrested 11 members of an extended family who married and divorced each other 23 times in two weeks to cash in on an urban renewal project when their village was designated for demolition.”
What they don’t even mention is that people have long been fucking advertising online and spamming forums to get into fake marriages and divorce to do this shit. The CCP with all it’s internet monitoring obviously knew about it and let it slide for nearly a decade until current prices got out of hand.
My grandmother has severe trouble with mobility. My parents and a domestic helper take care of her. I’d probably be doing the same for my parents in the future. That’s why my brother and I live in close proximity to them.
Same here except most nursing homes around here are either heavily government funded or given “benevolent” grants annually by private individuals or organizations so they’re relatively cheap. The problem is there aren’t enough of them and they’re quite shitty. So it’s less about a “stigma” than it is about some people just not giving a fuck about their parents when they have the resources to take care of them. That’s why the government spent millions on the previously mentioned campaign (yeah I did the math lol). They aren’t promoting “values”. They just don’t want to spend more money taking care of the senior population. The luxury ones are privately run and aren’t affordable for the average person. There aren’t many that are priced in between.
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In Plato’s Republic, book I, Cephalus (himself very old) recounts Sophocles’ reply to an interlocutor asking about his love life:
“And he replied, ‘Hush, man, most gladly have I escaped this thing you talk of, as if I had run away from a raging and savage beast of a master.’ I thought it a good answer then and now I think so still more. For in very truth there comes to old age a great tranquility in such matters and a blessed release.”
The word translated as release here is eleutheria.
A related idea is autonomy; being able to give oneself one’s own laws.
Looking upthread, at “people seem to think that freedom means you should be able to do whatever you want to do without ever being told no,” would be called license rather than freedom or liberty (Plato uses both exousia and anarkia to express the idea of excess liberty in Book VIII).
The truly free person is autonomous; he is able to give himself and follow his own laws, which correctly aim at the good.
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Hey!
Long time no see, man!
Nice to see you!
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O SNAP!
ShOtS fIrEd 
Did I interpret this correctly?
Nope.
We had previously established upthread that of course she’s using people, with absolute minimum personal/emotional investment so as to game the give/get ratio.
Convo takes place between posts 142 and 163.
So most posters know that I came out of a long marriage, and have since remarried. I met my ex-husband at the gym I worked at, discovered he’d gone to college on an athletic scholarship, had a degree in English literature and a set of leather-bound classic novels. Check, check, check! Perfect!
We married very quickly. Over time I would come to realize that we were never going to cozily read books together. Over time I would come to resent his loathing of “fat people” when he himself cycled between fitness and sloppiness. Over time I would come to learn that I couldn’t save him from his quasi-suicidal depression because it wasn’t due to his being hurt and needing love, it was simply his pessimistic, unhappy character. Over time having this unhappiness externalized onto me became unbearable. He was completely incurious, and so would never fix his…anything. I was puppeteering him, and ultimately he resented it. So did I.
Yes. This is it exactly. I wanted, and have achieved, a partner capable of generating his own happiness/contentment. He’s as good-natured as I am, though we’re both also very headstrong and territorial, so we do have flares of temper. My husband is strong of character, honest, and loyal. We have in common that we both like being outdoors. He would like that I be more adventurous in that regard, but we enjoy the space where we overlap. He’s dyslexic and so not a reader, but he enjoys practical information. I respect his curiosity, which rivals my own, though curiosity takes us in very different directions. We agree on food and television shows well enough, and share a sense of what “family” means. I love his sense of humor, and we enjoy dreaming together, even impractically. What we’ll do/say to mess with the kids, what happens when we win the lottery and his cousin, our money guy, wants to talk endlessly about options (cousin has a Phd and LOVES finance) and we have to politely listen because he’s so nice. We just seem to live in the same head space most of the time. Not always. We differ politically and it can flare, but we’re learning to step around mines.
Most important in my view are character and temperament. These are enduring, while hobbies may or may not be.
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Yep.
I have hobbies that I’m engaged in or disengaged from that vary from fully into to completely ignoring that span decades.
Like, if I was matching up based on that I could absolutely say that I love fly fishing and do it as often as possible.
The caveat being that for a year or two, it just hasn’t been my go to.
Or snowboarding. I’ve been “a snowboarder” since 1989, but haven’t been on the slopes in a couple of years.
Or mountain biking
Or weight lifting
Etc.
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I’ve never done this but I’d love to try it one day
I really like fishing. Used to go frequently
