[quote]OctoberGirl wrote:
Most of us know about the Darwin Awards. I just had a call from a friend at work about one of our coworkers that deserves honorable Darwin Award mention.
The guy is 48yrs old, divorced last year, he left her, and so he started on this new life. He decided to lose weight as he has one of those pregnant woman bellies and he belts his pants under his tummy.
He drinks slim fast, he eats KFC as “it is chicken” and tons of diet soda. He says he walks enough and lifts enough boxes at work. He works in Shipping & Receiving.
What the guy did was he started taking a spoonful of bird grit with each meal!!! He had asked me about eating healthy and I suggested an easy thing to do would up his fiber and protein (I also invited him to work out with me, but he declined). I suggested more lean meats, Benefiber and celery.
NOOOOOOO he has parakeets which I guess you give the bird grit so they can digest their food. So the guy has been downing a spoonful of grit with each meal and has been doing this for a week or so. It clumped like kitty litter in his intestines and he was rushed to the hospital today from work due to severe gastric pain.
I don’t know the whole story but they may have to remove part of his intestine due to damage and infection from the grit.
folks… don’t eat bird grit.
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See…society is the ultimate Darwin award. He was supposed to die from his stupidity, but our society saved his life. Presumably at age 48 he had already procreated. If not then he still has the chance to extend his wonderful genes into the future.
[quote]Anabolic_Mike wrote:
I dont think you understand what a Darwin Award is babe.[/quote]
maybe not… it’s tough being a dumb blonde.
I did provide a link to the website for the Darwin Awards in this thread and I did title the link “Should be a Darwin Award.”
and hopefully it won’t become one.
In the vain of locking your kids in the trunk because you have better things to do, has anybody read “The Death of the Grown-Up: How America’s Arrested Development Is Bringing Down Western Civilization” by Diana West. It may be a little over dramatic, but there is a lot of truth in it…
That guy sounds like he is in a world wind of pain with his body.
[quote]OctoberGirl wrote:
maybe not… it’s tough being a dumb blonde.
[/quote]
That’s ok just sit there and be pretty in between pregnancies and pie baking.
So wtf does your work think about all this since he is trying to scam some woker’s comp money?
[quote]sen say wrote:
GhorigTheBeefy wrote:
Almost as good as the soft core porn they show on Oxygen eh?
Soft core porn makes She Say want to fuck in tandem with the movie…as long as Orpah isn’t getting her ass slammed on film I got no problem with Oxygne showing faux fucking. [/quote]
Soft core is a weird animal. I see it as a waste of time but most of teh ladies like it so I’ll suffer through it.
[quote]Nich wrote:
OctoberGirl wrote:
LIFTICVSMAXIMVS wrote:
OctoberGirl wrote:
folks… don’t eat bird grit.
What exactly is that? Like bird seed?
The Darwin award is too late for people who may have already procreated. According to Darwin he already won – his genes survived.
it’s some kind of sand or gravel that birds eat to break up the seed. Now… I should google this as I don’t really know. This is just what I was told.
How do you even consider this a good idea?
exactly
birds dont have teeth and to digest there food its kind of hard for them so they eat sand or rocks and the rocks in the stomach works like a tumbler and breaks up the food birds just poop it out just fine they are built that way.
we on th other hand have things like teeth and very strong stomach acid so we dont need rocks.
so yes dude was sand.
great
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this is exactly the case
i work in the zoo and have been unfortunate enough to have been hit by this kind of poop… its not pleasant at all
[quote]GhorigTheBeefy wrote:
OctoberGirl wrote:
maybe not… it’s tough being a dumb blonde.
That’s ok just sit there and be pretty in between pregnancies and pie baking.
So wtf does your work think about all this since he is trying to scam some woker’s comp money?[/quote]
well I haven’t been to work as these were my days off, so I am getting this secondhand, but I am wondering how the guy could be filing anything if he has been in surgery and having all these major problems.
I am thinking someone was assuming, but who knows, maybe he was gasping out, “I wanna sue!” between painful cramping.
it does sound like something he would do though. He went to our clinic over a papercut once, he said a papercut is dangerous because paperlint can enter your bloodstream and stop your heart
I hope you can read the story with the pic, he picked up a King Brown snake from the side of the road and ended up losing an arm.
[quote]OctoberGirl wrote:
I hope you can read the story with the pic, he picked up a King Brown snake from the side of the road and ended up losing an arm.[/quote]
"A Darwin man… "
Ha.
I hope you can see in the picture that they have an electrical cord being floated by two rubber sandals…
[quote]OctoberGirl wrote:
I hope you can see in the picture that they have an electrical cord being floated by two rubber sandals…[/quote]
There’s three of them in the pool! Probably all related too.
[quote]OctoberGirl wrote:
RJ should read this one[/quote]
Is that the definition of irony?
[quote]LIFTICVSMAXIMVS wrote:
OctoberGirl wrote:
RJ should read this one
Is that the definition of irony?[/quote]
that or karma!
I still can’t figure out the pool situation. There were three dudes that didn’t think to even move the table so that the plug didn’t need to be floating 3cm above water.
[quote]OctoberGirl wrote:
RJ should read this one[/quote]
That’s outrageous.
[quote]OctoberGirl wrote:
it does sound like something he would do though. He went to our clinic over a papercut once, he said a papercut is dangerous because paperlint can enter your bloodstream and stop your heart
[/quote]
That’s pretty lame. My 2nd grade teacher accidently gave me a paper-cut on my eye…praise the lord my heart didn’t stop. Funny thing was the teacher didn’t believe me but once I do see the nurse she sends me back to class with an eye-patch while my mom drives to come take me to the doctor. I think my teacher shit her pants.
You should make this guy get well soon brownies and load them up with chocolate ex-lax. Then again he may just try to sue you for excessive bowel movements.
Great Pics too! Reminds me of this snake guy on TV that kept being retarded with this snake and was bitten. He’s like 2 hours away from a hospital and he looks at the camera men and says, “I’ve been bitten oh no oh no I’ve been bitten”. No shit you fucking idiot you were on your knees right next to a snake you are lucky it was a finger and not your face.
Oh and in the spirit of this thread I present this…just in time too.
http://www.break.com/index/molotov-cocktail-baseball.html
