Ridiculous Gym Numbers

Off Topic
101

[quote]TheKraken wrote:
I generally leave people alone. I have a 2nd black belt in Kempo, not from Fred Vallari’s but one I sweated and trained for, for years. I also took judo when I was very young, wrestled and did BBJ for a few years (very humbling experience BTW, those guys know what their doing) most of which I don’t tell people about. I’m a big, potentially mean guy. However, my kick-ass/tough guy/pissing match days are behind me. Once in a while I’ll get into “that discussion” about fights, fighting etc., and there always seems to be some inexplicably “trained killer that no one knows what they’re capable of.” There are people like that, such is life.

I hit a 315 lb squat x2 a couple weeks ago, but I’m 6ft and semi solid 315 lbs, so although I’m personally proud I don’t brag about it. I told my friend about it and and he said, “that’s great, I usually squat with three of the big plates per side.” I said, “that would be 315,” to which he changed the subject. I know he has never seen 315lbs loaded on a bar (accept for the time I was loaded and danced on a bar) and that he rarely leaves his couch these days, but there are people like that. Frankly, it pissed me off a little, so yeah, a little truth might be refreshing especially from a friend who celebrates taco night like it’s Christmas every week. [/quote]

Your friend means he squats 3 plates of tacos when he is sitting back down.

102

Damn, all this talking about breadsticks makes me want to go to the olive garden.

103

[quote]PimpBot5000 wrote:

[quote]Steel Nation wrote:

I was on a business trip, and the maintenance manager at the steel mill we were visiting told me there was this HUGE guy that used to work in their rail yard that could definitely kick my ass. This was completely out of the blue and about 90 seconds after I first shook the guy’s hand.

We still joke about it at the office.[/quote]

LOL, “nice to meet you too, friend!”.

I can do you one better. I was on a business trip to the states, and was out to a nice dinner with some administrators of a rehab hospital. Someone commented that I was a big guy and asked if I played football…pretty standard observation/question which I’m sure a lot of us here get.

Another staff member interjects that he has a brother “about your size, but in way better shape” who is a Navy SEAL. He informed me that he couldn’t give me his real name as it was “classified”, but he gave me his SEAL Operator (nick)name, which was that of a deadly animal. He went on to say that his brother could kill me “in a hundred different ways, all without breaking a sweat”. He snapped a breadstick while saying this to further drive home his point. Everyone at the table just sat there in stunned silence.

This was all before the appetizers arrived, by the way.

[/quote]

How does a conversation or dinner party ever recover from something like that?

For b.s. stories-

I haven’t had too many lately, but one kid at work was great for some doozies. Back when he played football he squatted 1100, and benched in the 9’s. I responded that those are some world record numbers, and he could easily break them if he lifted weights.

He was also in some epic fights wherein he hospitalized multiple attackers. Not only was he extremely powerful, but also capable of cartoon like violence at the drop of a hat.

104

The highest incidence of bullshit stories I’ve ever seen were when I was playing men’s league baseball. In 5 seasons of summer ball and 5 seasons of fall ball, there was always at least one guy on each team who claimed to have played in the minors. The number of pitchers who used to throw 90 was pretty damn high too.

Btw, when I was 17 years old I was throwing over 90 mph but started having shoulder issues so I moved to the outfield. I did pretty well in the outfield and played a couple years in the minors after college but my shoulder kept getting worse so I decided to walk away. They wanted me to stay at it, they had Major league plans for me, but my health was too important to me.

105

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:

[quote]PimpBot5000 wrote:

[quote]Steel Nation wrote:

I was on a business trip, and the maintenance manager at the steel mill we were visiting told me there was this HUGE guy that used to work in their rail yard that could definitely kick my ass. This was completely out of the blue and about 90 seconds after I first shook the guy’s hand.

We still joke about it at the office.[/quote]

LOL, “nice to meet you too, friend!”.

I can do you one better. I was on a business trip to the states, and was out to a nice dinner with some administrators of a rehab hospital. Someone commented that I was a big guy and asked if I played football…pretty standard observation/question which I’m sure a lot of us here get.

Another staff member interjects that he has a brother “about your size, but in way better shape” who is a Navy SEAL. He informed me that he couldn’t give me his real name as it was “classified”, but he gave me his SEAL Operator (nick)name, which was that of a deadly animal. He went on to say that his brother could kill me “in a hundred different ways, all without breaking a sweat”. He snapped a breadstick while saying this to further drive home his point. Everyone at the table just sat there in stunned silence.

This was all before the appetizers arrived, by the way.

[/quote]

How does a conversation or dinner party ever recover from something like that?

For b.s. stories-

I haven’t had too many lately, but one kid at work was great for some doozies. Back when he played football he squatted 1100, and benched in the 9’s. I responded that those are some world record numbers, and he could easily break them if he lifted weights.

He was also in some epic fights wherein he hospitalized multiple attackers. Not only was he extremely powerful, but also capable of cartoon like violence at the drop of a hat.
[/quote]

Why don’t they just throw in about how they cured cancer? ha ha

106

[quote]PimpBot5000 wrote:

[quote]Steel Nation wrote:

I was on a business trip, and the maintenance manager at the steel mill we were visiting told me there was this HUGE guy that used to work in their rail yard that could definitely kick my ass. This was completely out of the blue and about 90 seconds after I first shook the guy’s hand.

We still joke about it at the office.[/quote]

LOL, “nice to meet you too, friend!”.

I can do you one better. I was on a business trip to the states, and was out to a nice dinner with some administrators of a rehab hospital. Someone commented that I was a big guy and asked if I played football…pretty standard observation/question which I’m sure a lot of us here get.

Another staff member interjects that he has a brother “about your size, but in way better shape” who is a Navy SEAL. He informed me that he couldn’t give me his real name as it was “classified”, but he gave me his SEAL Operator (nick)name, which was that of a deadly animal. He went on to say that his brother could kill me “in a hundred different ways, all without breaking a sweat”. He snapped a breadstick while saying this to further drive home his point. Everyone at the table just sat there in stunned silence.

This was all before the appetizers arrived, by the way.

[/quote]

LOL!!!

107

[quote]on edge wrote:
The highest incidence of bullshit stories I’ve ever seen were when I was playing men’s league baseball. In 5 seasons of summer ball and 5 seasons of fall ball, there was always at least one guy on each team who claimed to have played in the minors. The number of pitchers who used to throw 90 was pretty damn high too.

Btw, when I was 17 years old I was throwing over 90 mph but started having shoulder issues so I moved to the outfield. I did pretty well in the outfield and played a couple years in the minors after college but my shoulder kept getting worse so I decided to walk away. They wanted me to stay at it, they had Major league plans for me, but my health was too important to me.[/quote]

Oh man, hahahaaha!!! I’m in fuckin’ stitches

108

on edge, from one 90 miler to another, I laughed for a solid two minutes after reading your post, thank you so much.

109

I once had a 20 kill streak in mod. Warefare one up that

110

A few months a guy i met a guy at 18 who claimed a 160kg (352lb) bench, but didn’t know what a dead-lift was

111

Yup, I’ve heard my fair share.

Best one was this dude (complete plonker! Got his head kicked in for selling some oregano as weed, lol). He looked at one of my adjustable dbs (12kgs) & said: Is that all you can lift, I said: No, that’s just a warm-up weight, he then picks up the db, rather awkwardly manages a few reps & drops it on my living room floor.

I would have told him off for it, but I was too busy trying to stifle giggles.

I’ve never really bothered calling people out on stuff like that, I just make a mental note of it & chuckle about it later.

112

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:
He was also in some epic fights wherein he hospitalized multiple attackers. Not only was he extremely powerful, but also capable of cartoon like violence at the drop of a hat.
[/quote]

Guy I knew from college – 5’5 120lbs at best – claimed to have been jumped by three guys in the ghetto, but with a tire iron and mad martial arts skills, sent them all to the hospital. Considering he then moved halfway across the country, and lived out of a hostel, laying low… there might have been some truth to his story. Honestly have no clue. Dude was fucking crazy, in the “should probably be institutionalized” sense.

Once when walking back from campus, guy ducked to the ground, claiming he could feel the laser dot of a sniper rifle on the back of his head. Was also paranoid to go out at night, afraid he’d be “jumped by guerillas”. First time I heard him say that, I thought he was scared of gorillas.

113

[quote]MattyG35 wrote:

[quote]on edge wrote:
The highest incidence of bullshit stories I’ve ever seen were when I was playing men’s league baseball. In 5 seasons of summer ball and 5 seasons of fall ball, there was always at least one guy on each team who claimed to have played in the minors. The number of pitchers who used to throw 90 was pretty damn high too.

Btw, when I was 17 years old I was throwing over 90 mph but started having shoulder issues so I moved to the outfield. I did pretty well in the outfield and played a couple years in the minors after college but my shoulder kept getting worse so I decided to walk away. They wanted me to stay at it, they had Major league plans for me, but my health was too important to me.[/quote]

Oh man, hahahaaha!!! I’m in fuckin’ stitches[/quote]

Why?

114

[quote]on edge wrote:

[quote]MattyG35 wrote:

[quote]on edge wrote:
The highest incidence of bullshit stories I’ve ever seen were when I was playing men’s league baseball. In 5 seasons of summer ball and 5 seasons of fall ball, there was always at least one guy on each team who claimed to have played in the minors. The number of pitchers who used to throw 90 was pretty damn high too.

Btw, when I was 17 years old I was throwing over 90 mph but started having shoulder issues so I moved to the outfield. I did pretty well in the outfield and played a couple years in the minors after college but my shoulder kept getting worse so I decided to walk away. They wanted me to stay at it, they had Major league plans for me, but my health was too important to me.[/quote]

Oh man, hahahaaha!!! I’m in fuckin’ stitches[/quote]

Why?[/quote]

Cuz that was some damn near-perfect storytelling.

115

I bet Jesus heard whoppers.

Yea well I died and came back in 1 day what took you so long.

I turned water into gas

I ran a 4.2 forty on water, why did you walk.

116

[quote]Derek542 wrote:
I bet Jesus heard whoppers.

Yea well I died and came back in 1 day what took you so long.

I turned water into gas

I ran a 4.2 forty on water, why did you walk.[/quote]

i loled.

you’re the son of God? meh, my dad’s allah, my uncle’s buddha, my mom’s kali.

you multiplied bread and fish? i did beef and lamb.

117

I don’t hear these stories all that often. All I ever hear mostly is “I used to be pretty ripped, then…”

Which, hey, whatever. Obviously what I think of as ripped compared to what they think is VASTLY different, but whatever floats their boat. There is one guy at my work who I’ve heard claims he used to squat 900 and bench 600, which is funny because he’s a tall fat uncoordinated weak guy, but he’s also known as a chronic BS-er. Meh.

118

[quote]Derek542 wrote:
I bet Jesus heard whoppers.

Yea well I died and came back in 1 day what took you so long.

I turned water into gas

I ran a 4.2 forty on water, why did you walk.[/quote]

Yeah well…I can turn beer into gas…I once belched a cyclone. I think they called it Tracy. Does that count?

119

[quote]MartyMonster wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:
I bet Jesus heard whoppers.

Yea well I died and came back in 1 day what took you so long.

I turned water into gas

I ran a 4.2 forty on water, why did you walk.[/quote]

Yeah well…I can turn beer into gas…I once belched a cyclone. I think they called it Tracy. Does that count?[/quote]

Uh you are not very religious are you?

120

I myself 5’9 140 pounds. 150 pound clean and press, 175 bench 245 squat (legit ass to grass) and a 375 deadlift.
I was in the Army until I broke my leg at basic. I know, not long at all, but I was in the guard for almost 2 years so I heard some great stories.
Running through my neighborhood an old man who is a legit 5’5 with boots on told me “When I played football I wasn’t the fastest guy on the team, but I was the quickest with a 4.3 40”

Anyone with a 4.3 when I played would’ve by far been the fastest.
Also I love people who “Know someone stronger than you.”
I usually respond “Being stronger than me isn’t that great” and they don’t know what to say.