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It costs 35 bucks to get married in NY. Obviously if people value an outrageously costly wedding then thatās their call, though itās not necessary. People can have a wedding in their back yards if they wish. And the ring is a costly modern concept too. Diamond prices are grossly marked up. No man is obliged to overspend on a ring.
I was fortunate enough to have a diamond from a deceased relative who used to work in the diamond business, a discount on a ring from my then diamond-dealer friend who has a place in the Diamond District, and a family who spoiled me for my wedding. Of course I spent some of my own money, but I wouldāve gotten married even if I didnāt have those goodies given to me.
Plenty of poor people marry. Itās obviously up to two people how they want to live in marriage but poverty has never stopped many people from doing so.
Looking back with far more insight now, I would have never allowed modern and degenerate societyās expectations, constructs, trends, and fashions get in my way of anything I could control.
If I recall earlier in this thread you asked if thereās some acceptable, moderate number of sex partners that would likely not affect whether someone gets divorced. Obviously millions of people have stayed married after doing so and I donāt know what the exact number is. Someone can even have a long list and stay married after.
At this point of my life, you obviously know Iām not fond of the constructs of dating and boyfriend-girlfriend. It someone presents to me the topic of casual sex, my question is āwhy?ā, and it is actually asked irrespective of religion. If a man goes on some costly hunt (time, money) with all the flirting, āgameā, and ādatesā involved and then getting even sightly emotionally wrapped up with a woman, only to have sex with her, I cannot see why he wouldnāt just go to a place with legalized prostitution, which might even be less costly in some respects. After all, āitās just sex.ā
Considering we can tie in religious thought, The theologian Thomas Aquinas and St. Augustine had some things to say about prostitution.
Itās quite interesting as to just how worthless diamonds really are. Rather supply is cut off from the public, thus clever advertising + corporate manipulation = an exorbitant public mark-up
Many are shocked when they come across and try yo pawn (example) a14K white gold diamond ring that weighs sayā¦ 3 grams, only to be offered a sum in the ballpark of 1-200$ for the ring. āI must be getting scammedā
Noā¦ jewelry is only worth itās weight in gold/silverā¦
I know because I used to collect gold/silver coins with my pocket money. There were two ways about. My predominant manner of doing so was by going to the store, purchasing scrap silver coins within a large tub and filling up books with sequential dates. Scrap coins were sold at weight + a slight markup.
Second manner would be by going to the bank, procuring boxes of dimes/quarters, going through them, pick out the silver ones, hand the box back to the bank and rinse/repeat.
If I wanted ājust silverā, or ājust goldā my coin guy also sold scrap silver and gold in the form of jewelry and antiques his customers would pawn off to him. These were sold more/less at weight. Through this way I used to buy rings that I likedā¦ sometimes these would include fairly nice looking diamond rings. Whether the diamonds were real or mad madeā¦ Iām assuming man madeā¦ but buying a nice Sterling silver wedding ring for 4$ or a diamond gold ring for 60$ wasā¦ oddā¦
I only stopped coin collecting because there wasnāt much of a scene for it in Ausā¦ I enjoyed it very much.
Theyāre only expectations if you conform to meet the status quo. To which you havenāt. Even if we donāt always see eye to eye I must sayā¦ good on you for taking initiative and choosing to follow the path you believe is best.
Many want a relationship, but the construct of marriage is daunting as it entails spending the rest of your life with someone. Most my age canāt even figure out who they want to be/what they want to do ten years from nowā¦ the daunting concept of who theyāll be with 30-40 years from now scares many.
It isnāt just sex men are seeking hereā¦ itās also companionship, and perhaps marriage one day down the line when they feel comfortable with the concept.
Many prostitutes are pimped out. Various legal and illegal frameworks do nothing to deter this from happening. If you see a prostitute in Singapore or Aus, chances are theyāve decided to participate by their own vioalition. However like pornography, the industry of prostitution is filled to the brim with fractured individuals. Singapore is probably the only place Iād feel truely comfortable doing thisā¦ not to say I wouldnāt do it IF I was desperate enough.
I donāt feel comfortable potentially helping out the paradigm that is sex traffickingā¦ or helping someone pay for their heroin addiction.
If we refer to seeing a prostitute to relieve urgesā¦ it is just sex for YOU (not actually you)! But what of the wider implications? What are you supporting by doing this?
Iāve actually been offered this as a birthday present before.
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Iāll look into it. Getting on a plane soonā¦ not sure if Iāll write a response as Iām not a fan of prostitution to begin with, so if this theologian states āprostitution is badā Iām not going to argue back at that. However our reasons for disliking prostitution will probably differ. With that being said, I still donāt wish for it to be criminalised.
Look into āthe Nordic modelā for prostitution (itās legalā¦ but at the same time it isnāt). I see this is a valid way to go about it if one canāt get rid of sex trafficking through legalisation and extensive regulation.
For countries like Singapore with low crime rates and VERY low rates of drug useā¦ sure, legalised prostitution works.
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It isnāt the marriage Iām talking about. Iām talking about the cost of an apartment/a houseā¦ the cost of living is so high in Australia most canāt even afford RENT before the age of 25.
Take into account the cost of a child. Seriouslyā¦ look into cost of living for Melbourne, Sydney, New York, Tel Aviv etc.
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I made the mistake of getting into an argument with a commentor on a youtube video (Crackedās honest ad about megachurches) about the problems megachurches can cause and the false idols they produce (looking at you Joel Osteen).
You would think I would have learned my lesson to not comment on issues like this except here in PWI. Seriously, T-Nation may be the most respectful place for differing opinions on the net.
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I think if anybody says they know, like know for a fact, they are probably wrong. I have heard tons of theories as to why from Sam Harris to CAIR and everything in between. A lot of people point to their teachings. I am not so sure. Itās certainly fair that every religion has some degree of conflicting teachings. And Islam has āgoodā teachings and pretty bad stuff by 21st century standards of relative morality. I have to think itās something in the culture, in certain regions. Certainly there are moderate Muslims who live in peace with their neighbors and are pretty much normal. The part I cannot get over and the part I dislike the most is there near universal hatred for Jews. And maybe that is the answer. It certainly can be the answer. I have never met a muslim, or seen a Muslim who did not hate Jews. They can be fine with everybody else, they can even be friendly-ish with Jewish individuals, but they hate Jews by default. Perhaps, if you have a baked in hatred for an entire people, there is no way you can be at peace universally. That is why the Christian tenant of ālove your enemiesā is so important. You may hate some one or some people, but you have a moral imperative not to and itās on you to fix it, not eliminate the āotherā for your hatred.
So my theory is the violence stems from hating Jews. Even if Jews arenāt always the targets of the violence, it seems to make sense violence would come if you have innate hatred.
Thereās actually a small book that answers your question on terrorism, why there is veiling, subordination, and sequestering of women, and cousin marriage. Many Muslim societies are tribal and their geography does not lend to high trust. For example, Afghanistan has 75 tribes and 600 clans and it is mountainous.
There is more detail. But if you do some digging you might find the book.
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Wasnāt aware of this one being a construct within modern day Islam
First cousins or distant relatives?
I haveā¦ Iām friends with a Muslim woman, we were quite close at one point in timeā¦ as was my brother (same woman)
Our political ideologies vehemently clashed, but we still enjoyed talking to one another.
Yes, first and second cousins.
āSweet home Afghanistanā
āWhere the skies are so blueā
She had no issues with Jews or Israel?
She had an issue with israel, but not Jews. She actually had somewhat of a thing for dating Jews
It was very odd
There you goā¦ I know you are young. I have heard this trope. I had a muslim friend as well and we became pretty good friends. He used to complain how mean and controlling his very traditional wife was. I went to mosque with him and everything. He said also, he didnāt hate Jews, but he loathed Israel. But the reality he hated Jewsā¦ He would let the mask slip every once in a while, when he would criticize harshly, institutions or people who happened to be Jewish, for no other reason but for being Jewish. Like he quit drinking Coca-Cola for a while, because the head of Coke was a Jew. Soooā¦ If you are anti-Israel, you are anti-Semitic. They two are the same sides of a coin. I donāt buy the āI just donāt like Israelā line. Why? What has Israel done that is so unique from any other place on Earth, to have a particular hatred of them?
If you just hate the actions of a country, then you universally hate that same action done by any other country, but that is not the case with Israel. Israel as a nation has not done anything worse or better than any other country at one time or another. The singling out of Israel for ācrimesā while ignoring say Saudi Arabia or Iran or Lybia, or Sudan for similar actions is problematic. So why Israel? Because they are Jewish, thatās why. Itās the same on the American Left as it is with most Muslims. For some reason they just hate Jews.
I cannot dignify or respect the codified hatred of a people because they were born a type of way. That is my biggest beef with Islam.
Anti-zionist
Exactly
She DID dislike countries like Saudi btw @pat
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I can sympathise with it however. Many are indoctrinated from birth to systemically hate.
Such an individual will have immense difficulty pulling away from harbouring preconceived notions about a demographic, whether rational or irrational because indoctrination is such a powerful tool.
Btw, the cousin marriage comes from low-trust living.