Quest for 2950lb Bench Press

So, I was at Generic Nutritional Centre and decided that I would try a new supplement. I was looking around for something with a bit of creatine, some BCAA’s and some beta-alanine.

Then, I found it… the supplement that is going to take me over the top. Right there on the label it said my bench press would increase 1180% That’s right. Eleven hundred and eighty percent. I don’t think we have enough plates at my gym for me to do this today, but I will still try for about a 500% increase today… . which should be pretty easy.

Wish me luck, I’ll see you guys in the record books!

  • I can’t believe none of you guys have tried this earlier… stupid idiots.

And don’t try to say all that “research” bullshit you guys always say, this study on this product was performed at a university. A reputable on at that.

sounds legit

[quote]Im_New_Feed_Me wrote:

So, I was at Generic Nutritional Centre and decided that I would try a new supplement. I was looking around for something with a bit of creatine, some BCAA’s and some beta-alanine.

Then, I found it… the supplement that is going to take me over the top. Right there on the label it said my bench press would increase 1180% That’s right. Eleven hundred and eighty percent. I don’t think we have enough plates at my gym for me to do this today, but I will still try for about a 500% increase today… . which should be pretty easy.

Wish me luck, I’ll see you guys in the record books!

  • I can’t believe none of you guys have tried this earlier… stupid idiots.

And don’t try to say all that “research” bullshit you guys always say, this study on this product was performed at a university. A reputable on at that.

[/quote]

Bear in mind that is 1180% in Canadian units.

I’ll be waiting for the news report where your spotters couldn’t catch the weight and you were decapitated. :slight_smile:

[quote]lewhitehurst wrote:
I’ll be waiting for the news report where your spotters couldn’t catch the weight and you were decapitated. :-)[/quote]

dude it probably increases deadlifts by about 800% so as long as his spotters take a shot of it before he benches they should be able to pick it up off him just fine.

[quote]AccipiterQ wrote:

[quote]lewhitehurst wrote:
I’ll be waiting for the news report where your spotters couldn’t catch the weight and you were decapitated. :-)[/quote]

dude it probably increases deadlifts by about 800% so as long as his spotters take a shot of it before he benches they should be able to pick it up off him just fine.[/quote]

Kill my dream damnit!

If you run out of plates, just carry some cars inside to replace them. That stuff has to put your farmer’s walk to at least 1/2 ton per hand, so just grab some gym attendant’s cars and you’ll be good.

If the bottle says to put it in your sucks don’t believe it, it’s a trap.

Does this “supplement” involve being bitten by some type of radioactive insect or fish?

[quote]lewhitehurst wrote:

[quote]AccipiterQ wrote:

[quote]lewhitehurst wrote:
I’ll be waiting for the news report where your spotters couldn’t catch the weight and you were decapitated. :-)[/quote]

dude it probably increases deadlifts by about 800% so as long as his spotters take a shot of it before he benches they should be able to pick it up off him just fine.[/quote]

Kill my dream damnit! [/quote]

That’s the beauty of it: if the spotters dose up he can do partial reps with 8850. Which is far preferable to a measly 2950.

[quote]dday wrote:
If the bottle says to put it in your sucks don’t believe it, it’s a trap.[/quote]
True. If it says to put it in your socks though, it’s legit.

[quote]inkaddict wrote:

[quote]dday wrote:
If the bottle says to put it in your sucks don’t believe it, it’s a trap.[/quote]
True. If it says to put it in your socks though, it’s legit.[/quote]

haha! Yea that.

Could you give us the website for this?

If it’s another one of those supplements telling you to put it down your pee hole I ain’t doing it!

video pls

So… I just got back from the gym.

As it turns out, I got a lot of energy from said supplement, and FELT like my power level was over 9000, but my bench did not go up like expected. I did hit a new PR, which I am ok with, but it wasn’t 1108.2% above my best.(I got the percentage wrong in the OP, I was just too fucking excited to read it right) also, it says my leg press should have gone up 53.5% - which I did not attempt today, but squat day is on Tuesday. . so, who knows.

I don’t think I can post the link to the supp, but we can hopefully play the “sounds like” game.

Sounds like Go-Shitgun. “Go” being the word that sounds like the opposite of yes, and “shitgun” sounding like a weapon that shoots bullets.

Google it and be amazed at the awesome claims.

^^ Done!

Wow, they should patent the letter X then they’ll make more money…they certainly used it a lot.


That’s all great, but will it turn my hair yellow?

[quote]Im_New_Feed_Me wrote:
and “shitgun” sounding like a weapon that shoots bullets.
[/quote]

Rifle?

Fucking unarmed Canadians.

[quote]Im_New_Feed_Me wrote:
and “shitgun” sounding like a weapon that shoots shitgun shells.
[/quote]

[quote]SteelyD wrote:

[quote]Im_New_Feed_Me wrote:
and “shitgun” sounding like a weapon that shoots bullets.
[/quote]

Rifle?

Fucking unarmed Canadians.

[quote]Im_New_Feed_Me wrote:
and “shitgun” sounding like a weapon that shoots shitgun shells.
[/quote]

[/quote]

I suppose you’ve never seen Canadian military. Feast your eyes on our latest project. Rumours are that it cost about 6 billion so far for the prototype.