[quote]Cortes wrote:
2. This type of porn IS addictive for certain guys, and they DO need help and they DO need to understand what is going on.[/quote]
This. Very much this.
I’m not one of those guys, but a good friend of mine is.
He started with porn and a couple failed relationships, and over time, moved onto hookers (thanks Amsterdam and Germany) and street walkers.
For him, it was an addiction to novelty, as well as an addiction to absolute power/control. With porn, if you get bored, if you want something different, it’s just a click away. It’s selfish, and just about you – you’re in full control. (No moral judgments in that statement.) With hookers, well, you’re paying her for whatever you want, so again, it’s selfish, and about you – you’re, again, in full control.
It took a couple years and a couple serious scares before he came to his senses and realized what it was doing to him. Luckily, he managed to get away from that without acquiring any STIs… how he did that, I have no idea.
For him, he had to go cold turkey on both the hookers and the porn. He went and deleted everything he’d saved. And it was a challenge to see how many days he could go before he slipped up, but when he fell off the wagon, he kept trying again. Now he’s met a girl, and while I don’t think there’s any substance to that relationship beyond sex, at least he’s moved himself away from the addiction to control and addiction to novelty aspect.
Basically, I guess I’m saying this: porn can fuck you up, and for some people, it’s far worse than others. Will it? It really depends on who you are. Some people can handle it in moderation, some can’t.
EDIT:
I really don’t think it’s the porn itself. I think the problem is a mix of addiction to novelty, addiction to control, and the fact that the sexual dopamine feedback loop is so strong. Porn just happens to hit all of those triggers.