So what’s the score? Feeling any better?
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Well… I have to say I’m starting to feel the toll, that the last few weeks and months have taken on me. Exactly what I anticipated and feared. I’m starting to feel increasingly anxious on the weekends and dead tired during the week.
Hopefully not a trend that’s starting but I’ve learned to be mindful about these things.
So mental health wise, the score is dropping a little bit. Physically: I slept pretty good last night, I have been taking walks on the weekend days and I am starting to recharge, I think. I will still wait until Tuesday before I train again because DOMS haven’t settled yet and a bit longer break will be good for me, I think.
Just too many balls in the air for a little longer than what’s healthy. I think you’ll relate to that, haha.
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To quote a wise man: what are you doing about it?
Hehe, I hope you’re not quoting the man I think of right now. Not sure that’s really a wise guy.
Good question. I’m trying to see in what ways I can reduce stress and engage in things that decompress me more. Simultaneously I try to get some things accomplished to reduce the pressure of things.
For insurance reasons I haven’t seen my therapist for a bit but I am theoretically still in therapy and will use that as well. I’m also trying to see where I can maybe get support from friends and so.
But ultimately it is like it always is: Being mindful is the one thing but it’s not exactly providing a solution unfortunately.
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1 oh squat
4 x 6 @ 60 kg
2 deadlift
4 x 5 @ 180 kg
3 power jerk
6 x 2 @ 100 kg
At first I was like “wtf THAT light?” But in the end that was pretty good to get a feel again, get used to the movement and also my left shoulder has been slightly iffy from benching lately. Used no supports for pressing.
4a seated cable row
4 x 12
4b db windmill
3 x 8 @ 20 kg
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27.10.
1 squat
3 x 4 @ 140 kg
This felt like the most awful squats I’ve ever done. Felt the deadlifts.
2 bench press
4 x 5 @ 110 kg
Misread, should have done 3. Was still feeling decently strong though.
3 seated box jumps
5 x 3
4a ghr
2 x 5
4b ring pull ups
2 x 5
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Nice!
I’m pretty sure you/ most people wouldn’t have counted 5 reps, haha.
Well, no one knows that without a video!
I have a pair of rings but honestly have never used them for anything. When I first got them several years ago, I tried dips, and they were too difficult for me.
I find ring pull ups difficult but not by much more than regular ones. My only reason for them is that my program says to do neutral grip and that’s the only option for that (plus I physically can’t do a supinated grip).
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I got my MRI results this week (not sure anyone remembers anyway, haha). Bit weird that I only got them after asking and with no further instructions, appointmens and so on.
Since I currently work in the neurology department, I grabbed a doctor today and asked him to translate the report to German (my own medical knowledge is insufficient here).
To make it short: I need further diagnosis.
Best case: No action required besides monitoring.
Bad case: Medical treatment via medication
Worst case: Brain surgery.
Working in neurology, I’d love to avoid anything other than monitoring.
Crossing my fingers it’s the best case.
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Thanks Bagsy, let’s hope for the best. Will probably be quite a while until I know for sure.
Scary stuff but there’s a surprisingly big body of evidence suggesting that I’m hard to kill.
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You’ve been through a lot, no doubt!
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Yeah, sounds a bit worrisome alright - really hope it is the best case for you. And that they can fix whatever it is that ails you. 
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I never really thought about that much until rather recently. When I’m talking to my classmates about past experiences (I spare them the medical stuff mostly), it’s become apparent that the experiences that we made differ a lot.
Everybody has to carry their package and I really don’t have it particularly bad in the grand scheme of things. Working in a hospital sheds some light on perspective. Not that I personally needed that but it’s a good reminder that there are a lot of people willing to give everything they have to trade shoes.
@doomyguy cheers man. We’re talking about an adenoma at the hypophysis which is a usually benign kind of brain tumor. Although benign means you don’t expect it to spread around the body, it can still be an issue. If the tumor presses on certain parts of the neurohypophysis, it could trigger an excess hormon production of different hormones (one of them for example being prolactin - the hormon women produce when they lactate to feed babys). Also the nervus opticus runs along that area. Big enough or placed badly, an adenoma might impair that, causing loss of sight (not all at once, i.e. you don’t go blind from one day to the other).
Well that’s as far as my own knowledge of these things reach. There’s a lot I don’t know and am not sure I want to know. It’s apparently not something that poses an immediate death threat.
The adenoma in question is at the backside of the neurohypophysis, which makes an operation a little more difficult probably. It’s not always necessary to operate on it. Future tests will decide that.
Although I’ve had more surgeries than most people will ever have in their life, thinking about operating on the brain makes me anxious.
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Thats a bit of an understatement.
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My mom also had a brain tumor. It was benign, but she had to undergo surgery. I still remember the day the doctors found the tumor. It was stressful for her to say the least, so I can imagine how you feel even if I have not experienced it myself. Hang in there!
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Fuck. Really sorry to hear that - good thing you are indestructible then.
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Hey. Lot of stress and… other things in here. Good thing you’re hard to kill.
I watched that near suicide-by-log from a couple weeks ago and damn…
You’re amazing. Strong AF. Hope all goes well and things look up for you.
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