Per aspera ad astra (strongman Koestrizer)

Well I was never “that guy” but that is only my bodyweight. It’s just not a favorable lift for me and compared to my back squat it’s got a lot of catching up to do. But Paul holds front squats in high regards as a builder for the overhead press that I’m workin on.
We’re both very confident that I’m gonna get it this time.

Hold on to that memory for when you are on Mark Bells powercast and he asks you for a poop story. I am guessing that many of us have been in similar situations just not with the funny chat with the coach.

2 Likes

em… :grimacing:

are you telling me you have never had to throw away a pair of undies and go home commando ?!

2 Likes

nope- I have had blood run down my legs after cutting myself during a set of dealifts (forgot to clip nails), dropped a barbell, a plate and stubbed my toe on the platform all within 2 min of each other and had bloody urine after squatting bc I had a tube up my kidney from surgery though

1 Like

The main question being, do you keep training after you shit yourself, or is that a sign that it is time to call it a day?

Keep at it if sharted. Call it quits if full evacuation.

3 Likes

Yeah vitamin D can go crazy high. Meadows recently was at 10 000 and it wasn’t going up so he started taking 45 000 every sunday to finally make it go higher

I didn’t know about this. Man you’re such a badass and an inspiration.

1 Like

I’m a little behind on your log mate. This is the first post I came to today, and I got so excited to see it, I skim read the other 50 posts. Whens this slated for?

1 Like

That’s very nice of you to say mate. However I don’t consider this to be my accomplishment. I took all the drugs, had all the surgeries I was told to and suffered through everything I needed to. Just as all the other people who survived as well as the ones who didn’t.

I know this is highly controversial and most people don’t understand this (I also have only said it out loud a few times) but… I kind of dislike the whole glorification of cancer survivors. It kind of involves the assumption that if the unfortunates that didn’t survive had just fought a little harder, they might have also made it. I have a huge respect for people who survived a chemo like that because it’s a lot to take and process, don’t get me wrong. I just wouldn’t consider the outcome necessarily an accomplishment. (Btw. this was just a rant, not really referring to you, buddy).

The experience I had fundamentally changed the way I grew up - being confronted with the possibility of your own wretched demise so early on in life does that, I guess. For better or worse I think it had a huge impact on who I am today.

Welcome back, I guess. Always appreciate you stopping by mate. I don’t actually know but I think we’re still a few weeks out. from the magical day. Confidence is higher than ever for this and coach told me in his last email that he is sure it’s coming.

2 Likes

I’ve been a bit absent for a week or so, training kind of slipped from my mind a bit. I’ve been looking forward to you making that 140kg for a long time though, no pressure or anything.

1 Like

Indeed, I agree with you. there’s a aprt of luck. But don’t diminish what you’ve been through. And what you are now. Some people could have just thrown the sponge after this. No, you’re proving life wrong!

For sure… people like you are inspiring me, to move my ass and get what I want and stop being afraid of life. It goes fast, and can come to an abrupt end in an instant.

1 Like

Although I agree with this conclusion, it doesn’t seem like I’ve internalized those points very well myself, does it? I mean with me being clinically depressed for years and all, going through all kinds of therapies and drugs (medication) and having reached a point in my life (twice) where I was almost ready to finish what cancer couldn’t.

Sometimes that infuriates me. Like I feel way too sorry for myself and like a spoiled arsehole. Sure I’ve had some bad luck and all but it’s really not been that harsh at all!
My mum said that to me this winter: “You beat cancer! Why do you think you won’t be able to beat this? You beat cancer, you can beat anything!”
I appreciate her faith in me and I agree but as I said the whole “you beat cancer” thing isn’t a narrative that I’ve internalized. I am not talking about the impact the experience had on me or others, just questioning the degree of an active part one really plays.

I think this site is great. We went from shitting oneself during front squats to experiencing cancer in a handful of posts, haha.

4 Likes

26.04

DOMS crippling me to the point that I literally moved at half speed all day. God damn I hate front squats.

1 deadlift (power bar, beltless)
4 x 6 @ 165 kg

Embarassingly heavy. I’ll probably use the belt next week to account for the frobt squat fatigue.

2 log lift (clean once)
4 x 5 @ 98,5 kg

3 vertical jumps
5 x 3

4 floor press
3 x 10 @ 105 kg

5 meadows rows
4 x 10 @ 40 kg

Notes:

  • you know frontsies are beating you up when 165 moves like that, lol.
  • today was very rough. I felt crap, was huffing and puffing, yawning despite my heart beating like a bongo drum from all the caffeine… just crap all over. On the other hand the weight I repped out like it’s nothing on log is very close to what we usually do in comp for reps. I need to watch my sleep and nutrition (no under eating)! Stress is going to dip in the foreseeable future (in two weeks - at least a bit), so I’m looking forward to that.
  • please don’t ask me how long this took, haha. Well the weather was nice at least. Sometimes you just gotta keep your head down and put in the work.
4 Likes

Firstly congrats on a brown PR!

Secondly you’re hard on yourself (or it reads that way in your posts above) for being depressed and not loving life the way you think a cancer survivor should. A couple of observations of I may, firstly and foremost depression is a clinical illness not a choice, you cannot (shouldn’t not) be angry at yourself or disappointed in yourself for having it, you can still be grateful for life and depressed. Secondly it’s entirely possible that your childhood leukemia and subsequent chemo actually caused your depression.

Just saying don’t be hard on yourself (not saying you should wallow in self pity - but I know you don’t do that anyways!) - you’re doing awesome!

4 Likes

It’s what seperates the boys from men… Wait what?

Generally true. I can’t imagine there was ever someone who hated me more than I have at times. In regards to feeling guilty… I used to. I don’t necessarily do so anymore, I’d say. It helped to learn and broaden my horizon. Also to realize that there is no way of brute forcing you’re way through this I tried to shove things away because I tried to tell myself that there’s no reason for me to feel this way (spoiler: Does not work out). .

It’s very likely that it played a part. If that’s through trauma/ behavioral conditioning or actual chemistry changes is debateable. As is the extend to which it contributed to my heslth struggles nowadays. I’ve been through this a couple of times in therapy (although not necessarily in depth) and I am sure I will go through it at some point with my current therapist, as soon as my insurance stops bitching.

Thanks friend!

Also important to notice that I’m doing much better than I usually do, all things considered. I just found the train of thought interesting and wanted to share these insights.
As far as me goes, I am in a pretty good place by comparison. I am not settling and still working. Just acknowledging.

3 Likes

Great to hear, particularly not settling, keep pressing on!

1 Like

:joy:

I never shat but yeah the stains a couple times I think ROFL

Amen.