Party/Social/Public Mishaps

How timely, I’m currently kicking myself for running my mouth last night.

I was hosting some friends at my regular bar, being a big shot but having a good time. It got uncharacteristically crowded and service got slow. One of my friends complained and, like an ass, I agreed saying:

“yeah this bartender is nice and all but she sucks”

Evidently she heard me, and was extremely offended.
Imagine how great I felt as she continued to serve me promptly all the rest of the night with a scowl on her face.

LOL at “who shit in my pants?”

Kind of like me when I cant find shit. “Who hid my keys?” Always trying to pass the blame.

BTW the only way I could think to show regret to my bartender was to scratch out my name on the tab receipt and write in “chronic asshole” and then leave a 50% tip.

[quote]ImSkinny wrote:
Ever been in a situation where you just want to punch yourself for being an idiot?

Ever say something that you though was funny but it only recieves an awkward silence?

I was at a party last night. Everyone wanted me to come since I don’t get out much anymore, had girls calling me to make sure I come out. Had people offering me rides.
I get there, everything is going smooth.
I get to know that several females have expressed interest, everyone happy to see me, basically winning at life. The works.

I am sitting at the table with some friends and I see one guy pick up a wine botte and throw it back, chugging it (??? classy eh?). My friend nudges me and says its empty, he is just doing it for the photos. I take the bottle from him and people turn and go with shit like “ehhh ImSkinny is going for it!”.

I wanted to show the bottle is empty and with the anticipation of me holding the bottle it would be funny. The bottle will be empty and I will be like “wtf?!?!?!” and everyone will laugh and laugh and laugh!

But no. The bottle wasnt fucking empty. It had a last gulp in there. So me being the cool cucumber that I am I tilted it without it touching my mouth. It all poured right over my white shirt. Red Wine. Everyone was looking.
Painful it was.

Please share any of ‘those’ moments with us![/quote]

You should be able to play that off with little to no effort. I would bet I could roll an accident like that into something more entertaining than the original plan? If this made you feel awkward that you really need to get out into social environments more often…

[quote]Rooster1980 wrote:

[quote]ImSkinny wrote:
Ever been in a situation where you just want to punch yourself for being an idiot?

Ever say something that you though was funny but it only recieves an awkward silence?

I was at a party last night. Everyone wanted me to come since I don’t get out much anymore, had girls calling me to make sure I come out. Had people offering me rides.
I get there, everything is going smooth.
I get to know that several females have expressed interest, everyone happy to see me, basically winning at life. The works.

I am sitting at the table with some friends and I see one guy pick up a wine botte and throw it back, chugging it (??? classy eh?). My friend nudges me and says its empty, he is just doing it for the photos. I take the bottle from him and people turn and go with shit like “ehhh ImSkinny is going for it!”.

I wanted to show the bottle is empty and with the anticipation of me holding the bottle it would be funny. The bottle will be empty and I will be like “wtf?!?!?!” and everyone will laugh and laugh and laugh!

But no. The bottle wasnt fucking empty. It had a last gulp in there. So me being the cool cucumber that I am I tilted it without it touching my mouth. It all poured right over my white shirt. Red Wine. Everyone was looking.
Painful it was.

Please share any of ‘those’ moments with us![/quote]

You should be able to play that off with little to no effort. I would bet I could roll an accident like that into something more entertaining than the original plan? If this made you feel awkward that you really need to get out into social environments more often…
[/quote]

It was a genuine facepalm moment.

Fancy restaurant, surrounded by beautiful females, and this shit happens.

Sure it plays off and no one thinks twice about it. But fuck, I failed.

Softmore year of college. Pissing on the side of a building after a party got out. A cop had seen me from across the street. He literally snuck up behind me and pushed me up against the wall…mid stream. He threw cuffs on me before i could even put my dick away. He didnt even let me zip my shit up and my cock was hanging out on full display. The jerkoff cop made me stand there for like 5 minutes before he allowed me out of cuffs to tuck it back in.

I got arrested and charged with indecent exposure…which is a sex crime in the state of massachuesettes. Like i was out showing my dick to kids or somthing. WTF. The case obviously didnt stick and after 2 court sessions got nailed with like a $75 fine.

To top it off. I got bailed out like 3 hours later. We were smoking trees in the dorm room when someone knocked on the door. We unsuspectingly let 2 officers into the room. WTF. They had smelt the pot and wanted to search our room. After giving them 1000 reasons as to why we would rather they didnt come in, they came to the realization that i was the kid caught earlier with his dick in his hands…literally. They made a retarded joke and left without searching the room.

This one time, I drank a lot of booze and puked.

My brother peed in my laundry basket once.

about 6 months ago i was visiting my friend at college and his roommate was out of town so i passed out in his room. apparently in the middle of the night i woke up and pissed in his desk drawer with all his season football tickets in there. they didnt find it until 2 weeks later (there was an away game the first week) there was mold all over, noone told me until like 2 weeks ago. I feel pretty shitty i woulda bought him new tickets lol. my friend just gave him his tickets or bought him one here and there. im going back this weekend and havent seen the kid since, he doesnt know i know not sure how to act to that one haha.

A ‘friend’ of mine got super wasted at my house, and my bro tells me he’s pissing in the laundry room, but theres a drain on the floor that ppl have been known to piss in, so I’m like w/e and stuff. Then I go look and he’s just pissing everywhere but the hole in the floor. Later on when he left my house, he would drive into a lamp post and knock it over. I’m pretty sure he’s still a 'lik.

Dude, you’re definitely in need of some post-traumatic stress disorder treatment! Don’t overlook the consequencies of such a traumatic event! Without help you may never get over what happened or feel normal again!

Good luck!

that would have been a perfect time to take your shirt off to show the ladies your sweet abs then proceed to get laid. way to fail.

this thread started off blah and turned into

BAHHAHAHAHA!!

keep this shit coming.

Not really a ‘social mishap’ but hilarious.

I am trying to go to sleep one night and my brother walks in the house from a night out, clearly wasted as fuck. Anyways, I wake up the next morning to take a piss, and I see that in his contacts case, instead of using contact solution, he put shaving cream and just shoved his contacts in there, with shaving cream bursting out of it and all. I just burst out laughing. He’s such a drunk, like just yesterday he fell asleep on a radiator.

MOAR. lol

I was snowboarding with my GF and her parents. We got to the mountain and went seperate ways. Anyways I wanted to show off my mad skills, so I was absolutely flying down a mogul run and was completely out of control, I hit the last mogul dead center before a (green rated) cross run and got randomly huge air, colliding with some noob skier.

It was her dad.

Two broken ribs and a sprained ankle for him, I was completely fine.

The ride home was SERIOUSLY awkward…

[quote]StevenF wrote:
that would have been a perfect time to take your shirt off to show the ladies your sweet abs then proceed to get laid. way to fail. [/quote]

you trolling a fail thread actually means you fail…bro. Ur face in your avatar fails too.

I was at a rugby game after party (aka "the third half) in Atlanta about ten years ago. It was an away game and we had just beaten the shit out of the home team. So my team mates and I are in rare form because we beat them by like more than 50 points or something - It was bad. So we were partying our asses off, and I was nominated to do a “flaming land shark”.

To those of you unfamiliar with rugby, this may seem a little off, but a flaming land shark is when six guys carry around a nekkid dood with a piece of cardboard wedged between his ash cheeks, and you set the cardboard on fire. So you go around the bar carrying the guy chanting the theme music to Jaws.

Long story short - I get thrown out of the bar in all my glory. No one could find my clothes, of course. I eventually made it back to the van that had my bag with my shorts and smelly game jersey…

Good times!

i showed up to my dorm really drunk my freshman year. The kids from my floor literally had to lift me into my loft, i was about 230 at the time so i wasnt exactly light. in the night i managed to roll out of my bed and my face grinded down the wooden ladder. my roommate woke up to me unconsciously puking, he put me on the futon. I woke up about 8 hours later to about 6 of my friends standing around me. i was concussed to shit, went to the hospital later that day. I couldnt go outside for 2 weeks bc the scars on my face were so bad that the sun would have made them permanent, that was fun explaining to my teachers why i wouldnt be in class. I couldnt even walk to the food hall, they would bring me food to my room. Along with that i got the nickname 2 face because if you looked at the one side of my face it was normal, then if i turned people were horrified.

I can keep these stories coming all day long lol.

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
this thread started off blah and turned into

BAHHAHAHAHA!!

keep this shit coming.[/quote]

Speaking of Shit. Last year me and my roommates threw a house party, and the 2 bathrooms in our house are right above each other. My friend had to drop a deuce so he went up stairs since the downstairs bathroom was for guests and had a huge line. After he flushed the toilet clogged and the pipe burst, shit and piss flooded the 1st floor bathroom completely soaking some drunk chic that was pissing. Here friend that was holding her up got soaked to. The best part was neither of them cared. Strangely enough they wound up coming to another house party we threw like two weeks later.

[quote]fighting_fires wrote:
i showed up to my dorm really drunk my freshman year. The kids from my floor literally had to lift me into my loft, i was about 230 at the time so i wasnt exactly light. in the night i managed to roll out of my bed and my face grinded down the wooden ladder. my roommate woke up to me unconsciously puking, he put me on the futon. I woke up about 8 hours later to about 6 of my friends standing around me. i was concussed to shit, went to the hospital later that day. I couldnt go outside for 2 weeks bc the scars on my face were so bad that the sun would have made them permanent, that was fun explaining to my teachers why i wouldnt be in class. I couldnt even walk to the food hall, they would bring me food to my room. Along with that i got the nickname 2 face because if you looked at the one side of my face it was normal, then if i turned people were horrified.

I can keep these stories coming all day long lol. [/quote]

did that shit heal okay?

[quote]cord13 wrote:

[quote]fighting_fires wrote:
i showed up to my dorm really drunk my freshman year. The kids from my floor literally had to lift me into my loft, i was about 230 at the time so i wasnt exactly light. in the night i managed to roll out of my bed and my face grinded down the wooden ladder. my roommate woke up to me unconsciously puking, he put me on the futon. I woke up about 8 hours later to about 6 of my friends standing around me. i was concussed to shit, went to the hospital later that day. I couldnt go outside for 2 weeks bc the scars on my face were so bad that the sun would have made them permanent, that was fun explaining to my teachers why i wouldnt be in class. I couldnt even walk to the food hall, they would bring me food to my room. Along with that i got the nickname 2 face because if you looked at the one side of my face it was normal, then if i turned people were horrified.

I can keep these stories coming all day long lol. [/quote]

did that shit heal okay?[/quote]

yup no permanent marks at all. the doc was pretty shocked.