Any interesting/funny experiences?
Threw up. It was unpleasant.
Fucked a dog in the ass.
What?
Woke up in a strange house…
^That, and in the fetal position on the couch.
And once on the bathroom floor with my pants unbuttoned.
Just the other day, my boy was so drunk he took a piss in our boys living room, then immediately denied it even though people saw him do it. Embarrassing.
Once I was so drunk I ran around a university cafeteria shirtless making siren noises, then when security came in (some 130 lb little bitch) I gave him a little slap on the chest and said peace out buddy.
Told a guy that I was in the Mafia and I was going to call a hit on him because he wouldn’t let me smell his weed.
I was THAT drunk. Or that much of a douche.
Still debating.
I pooped in the toilet one time.
I rode a bus, lay down on the back seat, slid off TWICE. Apparently, went somewhere to eat and when I finally came to my senses I was sitting on the shitter. Woke up the next day unable to squat down.
Aahh, the joys of playing flip-cup with rum
stripped down to my boxers and did a flip off a balcony (little less than 2 stories probably) into a 5 ft pool.
that was dumb as shit
Fell over in a boat and knocked my fishing pole into the lake.
…started sobbing uncontrollably, stood up and had my pants fall down, then tried walking but tripped and rolled down a small hill stopping a couple feet short of a bonfire.
Then I farted.
Man…so many stories…
Pissed in my girlfriend’s sock drawer thinking it was the toilet.
Walked through a taco bell drive through while my pants dropped.
Woke up in many weird places.
Threw up on the Vegas strip.
Lost my cell phone at the bar…lost another cell phone due to “water damage”…Left credit card, license, friends at the bar…
Hell, got arrested.
I’m sure glad I don’t drink that much anymore…
rolled down a hill and right into a tree. yeah, that hurt my ribs.
once in college, woke up in the middle of the night and peed all over the dresser (all hardwood floors too)
[quote]Ronsauce wrote:
…started sobbing uncontrollably, stood up and had my pants fall down, then tried walking but tripped and rolled down a small hill stopping a couple feet short of a bonfire.
Then I farted.[/quote]
I think you win. +10 points!
actually believed that waffles were better than Pancakes! Obviously this was while wasted because EVERYONE knows pancakes are awesome
[quote]Rocker3829 wrote:
actually believed that waffles were better than Pancakes! Obviously this was while wasted because EVERYONE knows pancakes are awesome
[/quote]
duuuuh shit you must’ve been trashed
Went to hooters, got in a pogo stick contest with one of the waitresses, went completely parallel to the ground and busted ass in said hooters. Went home, woke up, went to work in the morning, called the parents to ask what was their plans for the day:
Mom: Where are you?
Me: Work
Mom: How’d you get there?
Me: Drove
Mom: You were drunk as a skunk last night, we found you passed out in the front yard with only your pants on.
Me: Damn I thought that was a bad dream where I was getting yelled at.
Later that day, talking to the neighbors…
Neighbor: So you had a good night last night huh?
Me: Dammit, my mom already told you all?
Neighbor: No dude, I talked to you for an hour or so outside.
Me: Why didn’t you get me inside?
Neighbor: You just didn’t wanna go.
And another story:
Came home from a bar to write a history paper (had been at happy hour all day) and saw my next door neighbor in the dorm and we started horsin around pushin each other shovin each other and then he hit me in the nose so I body tackled him through the window in our room which was on the 2nd floor. Went to the hospital had this conversation (as told to me by the RA that took me to the hospital):
Nurse: Do you smoke or do drugs?
Me: No
Nurse: Do you drink?
Me: Yes
Nurse: How many drink on avg would you say you have a week?
Me: Around 120 or so.
Nurse: WHAT?
Me: I could be lowballing it, I just recently stopped drinking on Sundays.
Nurse: You have a problem
Me: No shit, I went through a 2nd floor window and am leaking blood out of my hand.
Nurse: No you have an alcohol problem, you need to go to AA.
Me: AA is for quitters.
Proceeded to have to sign a form saying I’d go to AA otherwise they wouldn’t fix me up. The nurse only put butterfly stitches on me and 3 months later when my wrist still didn’t work I went to a hand specialist and found out I had 2 severed tendons, glass shards in my wrist, and a few torn ligaments…FML
[quote]Rocker3829 wrote:
actually believed that waffles were better than Pancakes! Obviously this was while wasted because EVERYONE knows pancakes are awesome
[/quote]
I see what you did there.